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It was a late night, the wind blowing cold through the open window of the house. It was close to summer with the temperatures rising, explaining why you kept it open. However, that was not the only one as you were waiting for a certain priest to come back to the house you two shared. It was the night of the Arm's Length dance for the elementary school where your boyfriend chaperoned in order to make sure no one did anything "ungodly". It seemes stupid to you, but in Moralton you supposed everyone couldn't be too careful even if it was young kids. You brought this point up to Rod and he commented on how silly it seemed now too. They're kids!
Rod said the dance ends at 10 pm, with the clock now saying 9:58. You hoped he'd come sooner, but you knew it might be closer to 10:30 because of possible clean up and him wrapping up with the fellow adults. It was so lonely without him, wanting to just rush into his arms, and hug him till you pass out. Rod usually comes to sleep around this time as well, so you can't imagine how tired he is.
Tonight felt too cold, not because of the breeze flowing onto your forearms and face, but on the inside. Insecurity and vulnerability piling up all of today and digging deeper into you until it hit where it truly hurt. Just not a good mental health day where you wanted to just stay in bed all day and cuddle Rod, so you didn't have to think. But, you couldn't do that. You had to be a strong adult and work just like he did and it hurt, but you're now home. The second you got home you crashed into the couch, curling up and just staying there for a moment, whimpering. The emotional stress kept piling and it leaked out there yet you somehow got it to stop. Rod didn't come home to see you, having to do his normal work then set up for the dance. He told you of this the day before, something you were grateful for, but still dreaded knowing.
It felt far too cold and you gave up hope of seeing Rod pull in within the next minute, so you shut the window and pulled the curtains down. You went and locked every window, making sure another breeze couldn't sneak in. You were already clean and in your PJs, so you couldn't waste time with a shower. You looked around for Lucy, the cat you and Rod owned, but see seemed to be out and about, not having come home yet. She was an indoor, outdoor cat. You wished she was here, maybe taking your mind off of things, but alas she wasn't. You decided to head to the kitchen and put on the tea kettle, thinking some tea might soothe your mind and anxious stomach. You don't know what triggered it or what caused such a bad day, but it did and it took away your appetite along with your sense of comfort. It felt all too alone, isolated, and like you were nothing but the trash your brain said you were. You knew it was untrue, but it felt all too real.
Minutes pass and the kettle hisses, the smoke pouring out. You take it off the burner and pour yourself a cup of chamomile tea before pouring another one for Rod. He was a coffee drinker more than anything, but it was far too late for that. You took your mug and sat on the couch, feeling the heat transfer and stick to your fingertips, a gentle grounding sensation. You wished it was Rod's heat engulfing your entire body right now instead of the heat from the tea coarsing through your hands. You sat, feeling the oh so familiat depression seep through your entire soul and get lost in it; the thoughts grew louder and louder.
Somehow, though, the moment the loudest was coming you heard a car pull into the driveway, pulling you to reality. You sat up, setting your tea mug down and quickly grabbing Rod's to greet him with. The door clicked open and your boyfriend stepped in, closing it and sighing.
"Long night?"
"Hmm? Oh! No, not entirely, just more so tired and missing you."
"I made you tea"
"Aww, love."
Rod smiled and took it, bloeing before taking a sip. He then set it on the table and engulfed you in a hug, taking you by surprise before hugging back. He rested his head on yours and his arms wrapped themselves tightly around your upper back, his right thumb rubbing up and down. You grasped his cardigan, hugging back just as tightly.
"I love you, my darling"
"L-Love you too, Rod.."
The one sentence that slipped from his mouth was enough to make you tip over, grasping rougher and the tears came. Maybe all of today was worth it just for him..
He kissed your head and kept holding you, cradling your head with one hand.
"By this I think *you've* had a rough night, darling."
You hummed, letting him know it was indeed rough. He chuckled, but you knew it was with kindness before he kissed your head again and pulling away. He held your wrists and bend down slightly to match your height more evenly.
"Well, I felt quite lonely tonight too. Just watching the youth have their partners and knowing mine was being their amazing self at home wasn't the best. Holy potatoes, I missed you so much. Had to step out to talk to Steph for a minute!"
It was half serious and half joke, his mouth smiling with the crooked teeth showing, but his eyes saying the truth of truly feeling alone. That's him, your Rod and your boyfriend.
"How about you tell me about your day as we dance? I need to make up some time there, but it by no means is going to be arm's length."
"That sounds nice. I hope you didn't stop too many loving interactions from happening."
"Nah, I'm slowing down on that. It is kinda silly and I by no means want to stop their love. God might punish me if I stop that when I have you, kinda hypocritical if you ask me."
You giggled, leaning in for a kiss. His lips matched yours and he kissed back before you pulled away. He wasn't done, however, and pulled you back by your waist, his lips sticking like honey and tasting like it too.
You pushed him away by his chest, sliding your hand to his, locking fingers as your other slid to wrap around his shoulders. His hands did the same, his face showing a doofy lovesick smile. His feet moved first, moving back before turning to the left to have you face the door. The dance had started in your own space of privacy.
"I think this is going to show my age more than anything, but I always dreamed of dancing to 'I can't help falling in love with you' by Elvis Presley with someone. I know most kids hope for more recent things, more electronics and bass, but I prefer that."
"If you had a record player or CD we could be playing it."
"Hmm, well I suppose. We'll get one eventually and have it in this living room, right here."
"Perfect. Then, we'll dance to it, but for now how about an acoustic?"
"What? You really want me to sing? You lost your mind, kid?"
"Nope! You have a great singing voice and I wanna hear it, Revs."
"Alright, alright. Your charm won me, but you start."
"Okay-"
"Wise men say, only fools rush in.."
You began singing, your voice small and unsteady as it felt strange without any music coating the background to your voice and to be singing in front of anyone at all, especially in the intimate act of preforming for your partner. However, Rod just smiled, his eyes softening. He twirled you again as he followed you.
"But I can't help falling in love with you-"
His eyes were soft with love and caring, his fingers shifting to hold yours securely as you continued.
"Shall I stay? Would it be a sin? If I can't help falling in love with you."
You smiled, feeling the anxiety of the day slowly slipping away as he pulled you closer to him, almost chest to chest now. His voice flowed gently after yours.
"Like a river flows, surely to the sea, darling, so it goes- Some things are meant to be!"
A small giggle followed that line, his head bumping yours as his fingers clutched tighter for your line.
"Take my hand, take my whole life too. For I can't help falling in love with you."
He pulled you closer, fully touching now and surely not arm's length or anywhere close to it. He pressed a small kiss to your head and mumbled, "Together" before he sucked in a breath and looked back at you, his smile remaining.
"Like a river flows, surely to the sea, darling, so it goes- Some things are meant to be- Take my hand, take my whole life too. For I can't help falling in love with you. For I can't help falling in love with you.."
His voice faded with yours and his eyes shut, his forehead resting against yours. You shut yours as well, staying like that for a moment, basking in each other's company.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
You opened your eyes to see Rod staring at you, his smile so wide that his dimples were especially prominent. He backed away, still holding you though, and looked you up and down.
"How in the hell did I get you? Because this feels like heaven already."
You chuckled, leaning in and pecking his lips.
"I could day the same for you, Revs."
"Hmm, well I can say it more and more dramatically!"
Rod then twirled you against, bending his knees to make you lean with him in the stereotypical lover's pose with the woman leaning back and holding onto the man. Usually the man would have a rose in his mouth, biting down, but all you could see the crooked toothed smile that was worth a thousand roses. He held you, securely, before pulling you back up just as dramatically, adding another twirl in.
"Alright, how about we head to bed now? This old man is pooped."
"Sounds lovely, hold me more once you're ready."
"Of course, darling."
_________________________
You relaxed as you got into bed next to Rod. He was in his PJs now, laying on his back and outstretched an arm for you to curl into his side. You rested your head on his chest and he wrapped his arm around you, tracing little circles on your lower back with his other hand resting over his stomach. His heartbeat echoed in your ear, grounding you. He kissed your head before letting his fall onto the pillow. Tonight, he actually remembered to take off his glasses, but he was now squinting at the ceiling.
"It's so weird without having the glasses on. But, even from here, you're quite beautiful. Nighty night, love."
"Nighty night, Rod."