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Kiyoomi had never been around alphas (apart from his family) during his time in school. He went to an all-omega boarding school and he didn't have any friends outside of it.
So can you imagine how absolutely mesmerized he was when he saw Miya Atsumu in one of the hallways of his university for the first time? The blond, broad and utterly handsome alpha made hearts appear in Kiyoomi's eyes and made his actual heart beat so fast and loud that the omega thought he was about to burst whenever he glanced at Atsumu.
His omega jumped in circles inside him, all eager after Kiyoomi first smelled the earthy scent of the alpha when they passed each other in one of the lecture halls.
If one thing was certain then it was that he trusted his inner omega. They've been a team for a good while now and when the inner voice literally demanded him to get closer to the alpha, he was more than happy to oblige - after all, he craved Atsumu's attention, too.
Kiyoomi started his mission with walking closer to Atsumu when they and their friends (they had about the same group of friends, lucky him!) started going out; it was followed by always seeking out the seat next to Atsumu.
The next step cost a lot of Kiyoomi's courage. He wasn't used to spending time with alphas - let alone ever tried courting one. Nonetheless his omega's voice guided him.
Place your hand on his thigh, it said. Laugh at his jokes, it said. You need to make sure he knows that you like him, but Kiyoomi already knew that one.
But it was hard, way harder than he anticipated. In those cheesy (Motoya's words) books he used to read (and still does) the omega was always quick to catch the alpha's attention. They dropped a book? The alpha was there to pick it up for them. They 'accidentally' bumped into the alpha? Well, then the alpha would shoot them a sweet smile and say something like "watch out there, pretty".
Atsumu did none of those things and he barely acknowledged whenever Kiyoomi tried to make a move. They talked quite a bit - which cost the omega a lot of his social battery - but Kiyoomi noticed how Atsumu's mind always seemed to be somewhere else.
Sometimes the alpha even seemed a bit uncomfortable whenever Kiyoomi snaked his arms around the muscular biceps of the other, or when he sat (sticked) extra close to him. Or when Kiyoomi started to purr because he just felt so comfortable and safe in the alpha's presence.
Kiyoomi desperately hoped it wasn't because of his actions. Because the last thing he wanted to achieve was forcing himself onto Atsumu, or worse, making the alpha hate him because he didn't know what personal space was.
But Atsumu didn't push him away and was never rude, so he believed his inner omega when it whispered that it was all fine, all good. See, it said during one of the many parties they went to, other omegas do the same as you. And his omega was right.
Quite the opposite of Atsumu were their friends. They obviously noticed how head over heels Kiyoomi was for the alpha and how he desperately tried to get his attention.
Soon, they started making jokes, started teasing - especially Atsumu. "You and your omega," was the first insider they had and Kiyoomi noticed how the blond had to hold back a grimace whenever their friends talked about it.
"Did your little omega make you lunch today?" Kiyoomi would hear them tease when he made Atsumu a self-made lunch box.
"Did you two kiss?" was a question they were asked whenever Atsumu and Kiyoomi would leave together. "Or did you let off some steam?"
"Are you actually dating now or not?" Kiyoomi wished he could say yes but one look at Atsumu and he started to have second thoughts.
Kiyoomi felt a little guilty (or, at least, something similar). He didn't know what he was doing, actually. He didn't know if this was the right thing on how to court an alpha - then again, weren't alphas usually the ones to court an omega?
Kiyoomi was so confused and he started to believe that maybe his omega wasn't always right like he thought it'd be.
Maybe he should just ask Atsumu if he wanted to try dating him. But it scared him. What if he said no? Pathetic, his omega scoffed and Kiyoomi widened his eyes. That was the first time he had ever heard it speak like that.
You're doing nothing wrong. Kiyoomi didn't know what or who to believe. His observations or his inner omega?
Nonetheless, it still wouldn't explain why Atsumu didn't push him away then! So he was fine with it? Was he actually fine with an omega like Kiyoomi?
The mere thought made his heart jump and his face grow warmer.
+++
"Look at you two being all lovey-dovey again," their friends laughed once again. They were currently attending another party and Kiyoomi was, once more, glued to Atsumu's side. He heard the other exhale slowly which caught his attention.
"Don't you have anything better to do?" Atsumu said through slightly gritted teeth which only made their friends laugh louder.
It was probably too much and Kiyoomi shouldn't have been surprised when after a few more teasing and joking around, the alpha suddenly stood up and walked away.
"Hey, wait—" he quickly called after him and immediately got up to follow the blond.
They heard distant whistles and one of their friends even yelled "use protection!" after them.
"Atsumu—" he tried and was just about to reach out for the blond's arm when the alpha abruptly turned around to stare him down. He wasn't a small omega by any means, heck, he was taller than Atsumu. Yet, he felt a shiver run down his spine, making him gulp.
"You," Atsumu pointed an accusing finger at him, "are insufferable."
Three words. Those were three words and yet they stung like three thousand knives.
"You can't read a fucking room, can you?" Atsumu continued raging when Kiyoomi said nothing. "Why in the world do you have to cling to me that much? It's annoying and, I don't know, have you ever heard of something called personal space?"
"I—" he wanted to speak but the words got stuck in his throat. His omega was quiet, too, which only fueled his anxiety even more.
Kiyoomi tried to step closer to the alpha but the other was quick to take a step back. "When will you finally leave me alone, huh?"
"You didn't say anything," was all the omega could whisper. "I thought that—"
"What? That I was fine with it? That I was fine with being made fun of by my friends? That some...some wannabe omega started hitting on me and that I just didn't push him away because I thought that he must have some common sense in him?"
"Atsumu—"
"Shut! Up!" he yelled and Kiyoomi's mouth snapped shut. He knew that something had been off, he knew all along and he still didn't stop. His love and inner omega blinded him and now look what he's done. He fucked everything up and it was Atsumu's every right to be angry at him.
Still - he felt tears forming at the corners of his eyes - couldn't he have worded it a little bit nicer...?
"I'm...sorry," was all he said before he turned around on his heels and stormed out of the house. He didn't want anyone to see him crying, especially not Atsumu who might accuse him of 'faking it', too. Rightly so, he had to realize.
He ran down the street, the cold air filling his lungs. It stung but it was way better than the constant stinging of his heart.
Stupid, he had been so stupid. How could he think that novels would work in real life? How could he think that Atsumu wasn't opposed to starting something with him just because Kiyoomi wasn't pushed away? Atsumu had just been nice. Always acted polite towards a dumb omega like him who apparently had no idea how courting worked.
He ruined everything by having those stupid hearts in his eyes, ignoring how Atsumu must've felt all the time.
When he arrived at his dorm, he slammed the door shut and slid down the wall. He curled up, bringing his knees to his chest and resting his head on them.
Kiyoomi couldn't stop the tears, didn't want to stop them, in fact. He deserved everything he had been told tonight. He thought he was an acceptable omega just because one alpha hadn't pushed him away or had made him feel secure without even intending to.
He really was a wannabe omega. He had no clue how the actual world worked, how normal omegas were supposed to behave.
And the cherry on top of it all was that he had always been the odd one out. Starting off with his height and spicy scent. How often had he wished to smell like flowers or sweets like honey or cinnamon? How often had he wished he was smaller? More petite? He didn't know.
Too often, there it was again, his inner omega. Kiyoomi couldn't help but feel anger towards it. Part of it was its fault as well so "fuck off!". And it finally did, leaving him alone with his spiraling thoughts.
+++
Atsumu watched after Kiyoomi as he ran out of the house. He sighed in defeat. He might have overreacted a little bit but he also wanted to make sure the omega got the message.
Atsumu didn't want Kiyoomi to be clingy anymore, he didn't want him to always sit so close anymore.
Because he fucking hated it. And it primarily wasn't even the omega's fault.
It was their friends'. They just didn't know how or when to stop, they didn't know when a joke simply wasn't a joke anymore or when someone found said jokes uncomfortable.
Whenever Kiyoomi got a little too close, they'd start. Cooing "Atsumu's little omega" or "little lovebirds" or asking annoying questions like "when will you two start dating?" which, after some time, just weren't funny anymore (if they ever were to begin with).
Atsumu started to become uncomfortable, started to hate going out with their friend group whenever Kiyoomi would tag along.
He regretted not telling the omega sooner. Atsumu saw the hurt in his eyes and he was sure that Kiyoomi hadn't meant any harm. Still, he also knew that the omega wasn't exactly clueless either, he must have noticed something.
He just sighed again - it's been done now anyway.
+++
Kiyoomi seemed to leave him alone from then on. He stopped walking so close to Atsumu and began to take seats further away from him. He was way, way less clingy and with that, the teasing of their friends finally lessened as well.
Atsumu was relieved. He could finally breathe again without having to worry about his personal space suddenly being invaded or about his friends making fun of him again. Atsumu might pride himself in having much self-confidence, not caring much about what others said and thought about him. However, there was a big difference if you were being made fun of by strangers or by your own friends.
So, yeah. It was all good.
Until it wasn't.
Atsumu noticed how Kiyoomi slowly stopped attending their group activities. At first he believed it when the omega texted how he didn't feel well or how busy he was with school work, but the alpha soon figured out that Kiyoomi did it on purpose and that it were all lies.
Kiyoomi also stopped talking to him. Completely. Atsumu would've said they were friends, or something close to it, so the alpha actually wasn't so unbothered by it as he wished he was.
Kiyoomi stopped smelling, too. Even if the omega wore scent patches, Atsumu could still always make out a small hint of his ginger (mixed with a tint lavender) scent. At first it stung a little in his nose but he grew used to it - he'd describe the scent as pleasant, soothing even. But now? Whenever they passed each other in the hallway or a lecture hall, Atsumu didn't smell anything.
He once read that when omegas suddenly hid their scents, it could only mean two things: one, Kiyoomi was near his heat. Which was very unlikely however, given that Atsumu stopped smelling him around three weeks ago. Or two, that the omega wanted to hide a specific emotion - anger, frustration, fear,...sadness - because their soured scent would easily give them away.
Atsumu was sure that the incident at the party a few weeks ago was the reason for the omega's current behavior.
Yes, he wanted Kiyoomi to stop it but he didn't want the omega to suddenly isolate himself; especially because he kinda knew Kiyoomi actually liked to be around people and was somewhat touch-starved. Ah...yeah, he had to know, right?
"Have you seen where Kiyoomi is?" he asked their friends and really, he should've known better.
"Why? Did you two fight?"
"We don't know where your little mate is though."
It left him frustrated and he was close to just leaving it be. Kiyoomi wouldn't die without him. He could easily find another alpha with his pretty looks and he could easily find another friend group.
Do you actually want this, his inner alpha suddenly asked and he had to stop in his tracks for actually thinking about an answer. Did he?
Probably not. Because slowly he started to actually miss the presence of the omega next to him. He missed his lovely scent, he missed his touches and he missed his big, dark button eyes. Atsumu missed the omega's little squishy cheeks and how they used to press against his shoulder. He missed the other's gentle laugh and giggles and he missed...
It finally dawned on him: He missed Kiyoomi.
Fuck. This wasn't supposed to happen. He wasn't supposed to fall in love with him, not after he yelled at him for how sick he was of the omega.
Want omega, need to cheer omega up. Yeah, he agreed with his alpha.
He needed to get Kiyoomi back.
+++
However, said task resulted to be way more difficult than he expected it to be.
Kiyoomi kept his distance, he was more closed off than ever and barely spoke now. His head was hanging low, clutching the books tightly against his chest. His pretty, always shimmering eyes were dull and his expression was more neutral than Atsumu had ever seen it.
And it was his fault. His alone.
Not yours, his alpha tried to convince him but he knew better. It was partly his fault; if he hadn't yelled at Kiyoomi, if he'd just talked to him and explained the matter and if Atsumu just hadn't called him a wannabe omega. Then Kiyoomi would still be by his side, Kiyoomi would still look at him as if Atsumu was the most beautiful thing on this planet and Kiyoomi would have continued to make him those amazing lunch boxes and sweets.
But he'll make it up to him. He will, even if it was the last thing he'd do.
+++
Another week later and he still hadn't had the chance to properly apologize to the omega. Atsumu had to admit, whether Kiyoomi was clingy or distant, he was certainly good at it.
Then, finally, he spotted Kiyoomi sitting alone on a bench during lunch time. He was nibbling on an onigiri, not actually eating it.
Atsumu inhaled and exhaled to calm his racing heartbeat before he walked over to the omega, sitting down next to him.
He saw Kiyoomi startle and then noticed how the omega scooped away from him. Another wave of guilt rushed over him. So he scooped closer to Kiyoomi in return.
"Wait—!" Atsumu yelled and grabbed Kiyoomi's wrist as he saw how the omega stood up to run away from him again. "I—"
Kiyoomi didn't turn around and Atsumu felt his hand trembling against his own.
"I— I'm sorry."
Finally the omega glanced over his shoulder; even if it was only for a second. "...for what?"
"For," Atsumu breathed in, "for yelling at you at the party. And...and for calling you a wannabe omega. It wasn't right to say that."
"You were right though," Kiyoomi whispered back. The slight breeze made his soft black curls fly around on his head.
"I definitely wasn't!" Atsumu was now standing, too. "I was just angry and— and I was embarrassed. The teasing really got to me, okay? I know this doesn't excuse my actions but at least...at least it's an explanation."
The alpha tightened the grip around Kiyoomi's wrist, carefully trying to pull him closer. "I miss you."
The omega jolted and turned around. The sight sent a pang through his heart, making it clench. Kiyoomi's eyes were wide and confused, his cheeks were flushed and slightly wet. He sniffled.
"I don't get you," he mumbled and tried to free his hand from Atsumu's grip. "You scream at me how I should leave you alone, even though you didn't say anything whenever I was close to you. I thought it was fine and that maybe— that maybe you want to be with me, too."
"I do—"
"But when I actually stop bothering you, then you suddenly say you missed me? That...that you regret pushing me away?"
It made no sense, Kiyoomi was right about that.
"I'm so confused. I really don't know what you want from me."
Atsumu gently loosened the hold on the other's wrist and took the omega's hands in his. He squeezed.
"Kiyoomi," he started with a lowered face and caressed the back of the omega's hands with his thumbs. "Look, I— I know I screwed up. I know it doesn't really make sense what I say, it's probably stupid. But there's one thing I'm sure of which isn't stupid at all; and that's my feelings for you."
The omega didn't say anything and he took it as a sign to continue. "I don't really know when they started. Probably when I first laid eyes on you. You're so beautiful, you know? And your scent— your scent smells so good; it's soothing and calming me down. I'm such an idiot for calling you a wannabe omega," Atsumu winced as he said it again, "because you're the most perfect omega I know. You're special, so, so special."
He squeezed Kiyoomi's hands once more and suddenly the omega squeezed back lightly. "I'm so stupid," he laughed dryly.
"And dense," Kiyoomi added. The alpha snapped his eyes up to the other's. Kiyoomi had this look in his eyes, the one Atsumu wanted to protect and treasure forever, the glimmering and vulnerable kind of look.
"And dense," this time it was a genuine snort which left his mouth and when a tiny yet shy smile formed on Kiyoomi's face, Atsumu had never thought he'd feel such a strong urge to kiss someone like he did now.
He stepped a little closer, their chests were almost touching now. This time the omega stayed where he was.
"I—" he bit his lip and looked away.
"...you?"
God, Kiyoomi would be the death of him.
"I'm sorry, and I mean it. Really."
The omega mustered his face carefully and he swallowed.
"Can I ask for a second chance?" It must have been the hardest thing to ever ask. It was also bold, he knew that.
It was silent between them for a few moments.
"I thought you didn't...want me anymore," Kiyoomi then spoke and it hurt to hear how much he hurt Kiyoomi. "My omega told me to stick close to you, I thought I could trust it. I thought... I thought I could trust you, too."
Atsumu took a deep breath. Those words stung like hell but he had it coming. However, if the omega thought that it would make him back off then he had to disappoint the other.
"Kiyoomi," he placed his hands on the omega's shoulders. Those dark and beautiful eyes looked into his own hazel ones now and he wanted to stare into them forever, he had to realize. "There's never been a time I didn't want you. I'm an idiot, remember? Now I know that there isn't a more precious thing than your company or your touches; never has been and never will be. Because you're amazing."
"I am?" Kiyoomi broke eye contact. "I have no clue what I did, to be brutally honest. I have no clue how to deal with others, let alone with alphas. All I did was listen to my omega. That's it." See where that got me.
"That's it? Kiyoomi do you have the slightest idea how amazing that is? It's not very common to meet people who are in perfect sync with their inner voice and trust them fully."
The omega didn't react to that. Apparently, it wasn't the best thing to say.
"Kiyoomi—"
"You really should—," and the other let out a shaky breath. "You really should look for a better omega than me."
"But there's no better one. Kiyoomi, please listen—"
The omega shook his head frantically. "I'm not good for you, I realized this once I ran home from the party. You're so handsome and popular and I'm just... me. I'm tall, I'm blunt, my scent is so spicy it hurts to smell it and I love challenges. I'm not your typical omega; I'm not normal."
"That's what makes you you."
"And it's also the reason why you should—"
"Can I kiss you?" The question startled Kiyoomi just as much as it did Atsumu. He didn't think, the words just came out of his mouth but he didn't regret them either. He couldn't stand the way Kiyoomi talked about himself; just what did he have to go through in that all-omega school?
"...what?" Kiyoomi's eyes were wide open. Not because he was confused like before but because he was surprised; in a good way.
"Please let me. You are perfect, alright? I don't know what you've been told you 'needed to be' but let me tell you that's all total bullshit. Maybe you haven't growled at me yet or made a snarky comment, but I believe it's only because you liked me. Still do, I hope. Because I really, really want to kiss you and I really, really want you to be my boyfriend."
Red slowly started to spread across Kiyoomi's face and the omega played with his fingers - it was the cutest Atsumu ever saw him.
He saw how the adam's apple of the other bobbed, then, he slightly nodded.
Atsumu, eagerly yet gently, pressed his lips onto Kiyoomi's. They were so warm, so beautifully pink and so soft.
He sighed through his nose and stepped closer to the omega, pulling him closer by the hips. It took a little moment for Kiyoomi to fully relax but when he did, he wrapped his arms around Atsumu's neck and deepened the kiss.
It was amazing. The way their lips moved against one another and the way their faint scents mixed together around them, creating a little bubble where only they existed and nobody else.
When they parted, their eyes met and Atsumu wanted to kiss him again so badly.
"Does that mean I'll be getting a second chance?" the alpha hopefully asked and Kiyoomi had to smile at that.
"If it also means that you won't push me away again...then yes."
"As if," Atsumu breathed and pressed his lips once more onto Kiyoomi's. He didn't care if there were people around them, watching them. He didn't care what they thought or what they might do or say later - if they'd tease him for being a sap or if they'd joke something like 'when will the marriage be'. He had already let this kind of talking get to him once and it made him hurt this amazing person in his arms right here.
Never again, he swore to himself. He's going to be the best boyfriend Kiyoomi's ever had - and hopefully the only one, too.