Chapter Text
I actually love my job. I get free movies and free popcorn. Although I think the best part about my job is that I moved to management pretty fast, and that means I can boss Cartman around all day. I love to tell him to sweep the floor and wipe off the counters. The thing is I really wouldn't have to do this if he did his job correctly.
I guess if I say Cartman is one of the best parts of my job, it is half a lie. Because he also makes my job a living hell at some points. The lousy workers always do. There are a few of them. One of them is Craig, I actually really like Craig but getting him to do a customer service voice is a game I have yet to win at. He often makes customers mad because he talks so deadpan, and that is when I have to swoop in and give them free popcorn or a movie pass so they don't start screaming at me or him.
When I walked into the theater today for my opening shift I had high hopes for a good day. It's the start of January so we haven't had any big movie releases since the last marvel movie that came out two weeks ago. So it should be a nice and slow Monday morning. I unlock the door, and then lock it back up behind me. No one should come to the theater for another hour or so. So it gives me time to get everything set up for the day.
The opening shift is my favorite because it is easy, while also giving you a lot to do. I switch on all the lights so the lobby doesn't look haunted anymore and disarm the alarms. My mental to-do list is pretty short. Turn on lights, Disarm, pin the daily in and out schedule on the back room board, and set up the booth for the movies to run smoothly. Pulling out the schedule I notice that I not only have Craig as an opener but Cartman as a midday shift. I sigh, this was actually probably going to be one of the longest days of the week. I also notice a little name at the bottom “Stan” with a little “T” next to it. God damn it, I also have to train today.
“I'm not training the new kid,” Wendy says from behind me.
“Holy shit! What the fuck” I nearly scream “I didn't know you worked this morning you scared the shit out of me dude.”
“They added me on so you could train and there could still be a manager to yell at Cartman.” She smiles, and then adds “I just got my own set of keys, and you didn't hear me come in dumbass.” she laughs while holding up a shiny set of manager keys.
“I’ll set up the bar if you do the booth?” she asks and I only nod.
“Oh! Katie also sent us an email, apparently, we have a bus coming in around 12 for the flashback movie.”
I groan and put my head against the board. “Is it a Jesus movie?” I ask through closed teeth.
“Yep!” she pops the P at the end.
I don't say anything and give a nod. I start to make my way up the small set of stairs that leads up to the booth and the office.
“And don't forget the lens changes.”
“Thank you, Wendy,” I say and roll my eyes. She only laughs again.
I also really like to work with Wendy, she takes no shit and sometimes that's needed. I am sure it will be needed today when we get a bus full of bible thumpers ready to see whatever movie features the name, Jesus. Plus I can't do much when I have the equivalent of a dumb child to watch over all day, plus the new kid.
After another set of stairs, I finally made it up to the booth. Opening the door to the booth I am hit with the whirring sounds of six projection monitors which are only lit up the soft red glow of those said monitors. I hate the booth, it's fucking scary man. At least it's a small theater so the booth is not that big. Some of the bigger theater chains have at least 12 monitors, and that seems like hell to have a long narrow hallway with the overwhelming sounds of machines.
Carefully I check the show time schedule on each one, while also flipping the thousands of switches to turn the fuckers on. Today only theater 6 and theater 3 need lens changes. Setting an alarm on my phone is the only way I actually remember to climb back into the booth at random points in the day just to make the screen wider. If I don't set an alarm on my phone I get the Human alarm. Which is usually some snobby-looking old lady saying that the screen doesn't fit the ‘picture movie’, and that one is almost always less fun.
After turning on everything I grab a headset as I head to the office. Somehow the tiny office is the most depressing part of the theater. It's cluttered wall to wall with things tacked up on bulletin boards and two small desks with 3 computers jammed on them. We usually only ever use one computer for cameras and the other two are for doing the dumb paperwork that comes with dealing with a business. Logging on I see in our shift notes the first mention of the bus, which was mentioned at 2 AM last night.
On the monitors, there is a sticky note with scribbly handwriting.
“Dear Openers,
The slushy machine needs to be deep cleaned,
And all cash drawers must be recounted before use,
I was unable to count them last night.
Thank You, Katie.”
Katie is the theater owner, she truly means well, just sometimes I think she is unfit for the job she holds.
Carefully I open the safe that holds the cash drawers. Only lifting the three I need, I'll leave the rest to be counted by the night crew. Before I start to count I look at the cameras and see Wendy neatly stacking the liquor bottles in neat rows at the bar. The camera facing the parking lot catches my eye as I see a beat-up red truck pulling in. I roll my eyes at the fact customers are showing up an hour before any show times even start.
Shifting my attention to the task at hand I slowly pull out the coins to count them. I have a system for counting these. Pennies, Nickels, Dimes, Quarters, then I go from smallest bills to largest. Then after you count them you pull out enough money to leave $150 as a starting base for the cashier.
I quietly hum as I push dimes to the side as I count them. It looks like it was a slow night last night because most of the drawers are only around $300. Making it pretty simple to count. As I finish the third drawer I put the leftover money into our bank bag. I am still humming whatever song is left in my head from the ride over this morning.
I am about to unlock the safe and put the cash bag in when I'm jump scared for the second time this morning.
“Oh, I love that song!” A bright voice says from behind me.
“Oh, Jesus!” I drop the bag and it lands with a loud thump.
“Sorry! I didn't mean to scare you!” I turn around to see a kid my age with dark hair,
“I’m Stan! Uh, the girl downstairs, Wendy I think, said you were training me today!” he says through an apologetic smile.
“Oh, you're here already!” I smile as I turn around again to put the bag safely into the safe.
“My shift is for 9:30, I’m not too early am I?”
I looked at the time on my phone, somehow it was already 9:15.
“Wow, I didn't even realize the time, sorry! I have been setting everything up.”
Stan smiles, “It’s all good!”
“Do you think you could carry one of these drawers down and I can get you all clocked in after that?” I ask and offer him one of the drawers on the desk which he takes with both hands.
We begin to walk down the stairs when Stan starts to speak again, “The song you were humming, it was off of Lincoln's new Album right?” he asks.
“Dude! You like Lincoln? Sick!” I say with a light tone as we reach the bottom stairs.
“Oh, yea! I love his first EP! I actually got it on vinyl! It's this really pretty blue, one of my favorites to listen to.” he talks excitedly.
“Sweet,” I say as I put the drawers on the counter. I lead Stan over to the time clock where we keep all our time cards. I find his brand new one, which looks starkly different from the other few hanging on the wall. the years of use evident on them. I hand Stan his card.
“Okay, so to clock in you just swipe your card right there, normally we ask that you only clock in five minutes early, but if you'd like we can start the tour before everyone else gets here.”
He nods and quickly swipes his card through the machine which dings with a bright noise indicating that he was officially clocked in for his first day.
“If you just wanna hang here for a second I'm going to put the drawers away and talk with Wendy real quick.” I look at him and he simply nods again as I make my way up front with the drawers.
I put the drawers in their registers and head over to the drink machine where I can hear Wendy's music playing softly. She looks up to me and pauses the music. She has a mischievous grin slapped on her face.
“Hey I’m gonna give the new kid the tour, do you mind unlocking the doors when we open?” I ask.
“Sure!” she answers and then continues, “the new kid is pretty cute if you ask me.”
I just roll my eyes, “gross wendy! Also, that's inappropriate, wouldn't want Katie overhearing you trying to seduce crewmembers, you know she gets with workplace relationships.” I joke.
She laughs with a bright smile, “He’s not my type, but he is definitely yours.”
“My point still stands, that would probably get me fired or demoted,” I say with a serious look.
“Mhm but the good news for you is you only got a month left here and you're free!” she adds.
“Oooookay, anyway, I'm gonna go do my job now. Thanks for this very concerning talk at 9:30 am on a Monday.” I laugh as I walk away.
Wendy's music starts again. I didn't even realize that my last day is coming up in t-minus 5 weeks. I am finally leaving South Park at the start of February . I got this random job as a student counselor at some rich kid camp that is happening in Seattle. I don't come back to South park until the end of July, and then I leave for college mid-august. I don't think I have ever been so excited about something.
Turning the corner to the back I see Stan talking to a very dis-enthused Craig. Stan is definitely not getting the hint and I smile to myself. Okay, maybe today won't be that bad.
When Craig sees me he gets a sour look on his face.
“Kyle, I am pissed at you!” he says with a slightly raised monotone voice.
“What! Why! What did I do? I haven't even spoken to your highness yet.” I laugh.
“Not only am I working a hellish morning shift, but I also have cartman and yappy over here.” he points to stan who looks slightly offended.
“Hey, be nice to the new kid. Although say what you will about Cartmen.” Craig rolls his eyes.
“Oh, we also have a church bus coming in at 12,” I add with a smug smile.
“Yay. I’m sooo happy I work here.” Craig speaks with the most even-toned voice I have ever heard. Earning a laugh from me.
“On that note, Stan want to come with me. I'm gonna show you around.” Stan gives me a look of an acknowledgment as he follows me through the backdoor.
“Okay! Are you ready for your grand tour of the famous South Park theater!” I say in an overly excited tone as I stretch my arms out as if showing something amazing.
Stan smiles and opens his mouth to respond but is cut off by my phone ringing.
“Oh goddamn it! One second.” I sigh as I pull out my phone.
It's lit up with Katie's name. Woah she is up early this morning. She lets me run the morning shifts because she is famously evil in the morning. I answer quickly.
“Uhhhh hello?” I speak.
“Kyle! I just wanted to let you know that that church that is coming in is bringing 150 guests So I called in Kenny for backup.”
“Wait, isn't Kenny supposed to be Usher today?”
“Oh, I guess he is. Well, you can take over the usher cleaning duties. It's not like you and Wendy aren't there. I'm already over-staffed so you'll have to figure it out.’
“But Katie-”
“Alright, I gotta go. I need at least 6 more hours of sleep.” the phone call quickly goes dead.
“Oh Fuck off!” I say to my phone screen and Stan stares at me with wide eyes.
“Oh jeez sorry, I forgot that you were here.”
“It's uh okay,” Stan says as he looks down at the floor.
Nevermind. Today is going to actually suck balls.