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Jimmy was gone for two seconds.
Or that was the intention at least. Jimmy would admit, time slipped away easily in his true form, but the point was he definitely wasn’t gone for long and somehow in that time frame his vessel was destroyed.
Jimmy cradled the sad pile of stuffing and cloth. Normally he took more care when he had to leave his vessel, but Pearl wanted him to take a Listen at something she Saw and Jimmy thought it would be fine to tuck his vessel away in a bush while he Listened to one silly little scene. Except because the multiverse hated him, a storm started, knocking his vessel from its hiding spot into a mud puddle, where some animal fleeing for shelter accidentally tore it.
It better have been an animal at least.
Jimmy groaned soundlessly and scowled up at the sky. He was highly tempted to go give Joel a piece of his mind, but Joel didn’t know about Jimmy and Jimmy intended to keep it that way. He… hoped Joel didn’t know. If Joel was willing to screw over a Listener, Jimmy or no, he deserved a piece of Jimmy’s mind.
The soaked cotton squelched with mud in Jimmy’s hands, ripped almost in two and button eye smashed. There was no way Jimmy could repair it. He needed to make a replacement—except he didn’t have enough time. He was supposed to meet Joey for a gunpowder meeting soon for goodness’ sake! And thanks to the storm that had enough time to get worked up, he was much less confident about that small window of time left anyway!
… Jimmy was going to have to do something drastic. He needed to steal a Sheriff toy. Joel had done a frustratingly good job of making them look like Jimmy, and for once Jimmy was glad for it. He’d be missing all the patch-ups and prep, but it should do the trick for one little meeting, right? And then he could disappear to make his real replacement, and replacements for that so he would never be in this situation ever again.
Jimmy carefully tucked his old vessel in his robes and stood, thinking. He was closer to Joel’s than he would like, but he had the most toys. Jimmy could easily pop into his little store.
But what if Joel was there? Stocking up or counting his profits, or another customer was buying toys? An eldritch being in such a small shop would not escape notice… as though Jimmy could ever escape notice like this. To interact with the world he had to reveal himself, an old failsafe by the previous Watchers to prevent interference, a decision Jimmy now had to suffer for.
And Jimmy really, really didn’t want to interact with Joel right now. If there was anyone who would know what he was, it was a god.
Jimmy tried to think of who else he could steal a toy from. The issue was, most people only bought one or two Jimmy would have to search their homes for, and they had to be close enough Jimmy didn’t have to wander around like this—he could hide, of course, but at least two emperors had magic vision and at least three others had very powerful magic, and even as a Listener he didn’t want to push his luck.
Jimmy desperately focused over the surrounding empires. The swirling volume of noises, from the loudest laughter to the quietest step of an ant, went from background noise to the front of his mind. Once this was overwhelming to him, and now it was only a fraction of what Jimmy could Listen to with ease.
Jimmy sifted through the noise for voices, and sifted through the voices for anything that might help him get a replacement.
“—another round!”
“—ah right, Jimmy’s not getting this back—”
“Whose turn was it for the dishes?”
“—jump jump jump! Jump through the pudd—"
“Why did the chicken—”
“—mn llama, going to take forever to wash this spit out—”
“—behave Owen, I’m going to housekeep the rooms—"
Jimmy zeroed in on Scott’s voice, memory of a tour he tried hard to forget about surfacing. What had he said? “The only hotel where you can sleep with the Sheriff.”
Scott had toys. Scott had lots of toys. Scott had lots of toys for anyone to take. Surely he wouldn’t notice one missing. And Jimmy was just that little bit closer to Chromia over the Toy Barn anyway, it was perfect!
Jimmy nodded to himself and tucked his form away from third-dimensional sight. It took mere minutes to slip over to the hotel in Chromia, nearly empty in the middle of the day despite the storm driving people inside, likely because of the spitting llama.
Jimmy stopped under a window and turned all his attention to tracking Scott and anyone else in the hotel proper. To his relief, it just seemed to be Scott. He was muttering to himself about something a guest was carrying around that dripped magic wherever they went.
Ah. Right. Scott was one of those emperors with the magic vision. Jimmy wished he’d pressed Sausage for more information during the gossip ramble the eye was mentioned. Could it see through walls? Could it see souls? Could it see what was hidden by Beings beyond the firewalls?
Probably not. Scott would have gone crazy long ago if he could see those last two things, unless Jimmy wasn’t the only eldritch being on the server; then Grian would laugh at him for not noticing.
Oh Void, please don’t let Scott being another eldritch being.
Jimmy shook his thoughts away—and the faint laughter of Keralis, the cheeky Primordial—and refocused on Scott again. He closed a door behind him, securely locking it and tucking the key in a pocket, and took out another key to open another door. Jimmy Listened to him identify what he needed to clean and strip the bed of its sheets.
Satisfied Scott was busy, Jimmy flew to a window and tried it. To his relief, it was unlocked. To less of his relief, he forgot to check for anyone watching.
Jimmy froze when he Heard the llama below him. He Heard it stop chewing grass, Heard it turn its head to blink at the slightly open window and the flash of the Listener with a baffled grunt, and Heard it finally get shooed away by a worker. Jimmy waited a few more minutes for the worker to leave and pushed the window open the rest of the way. Like all things Jimmy interacted with, it was perfectly silent. The rain rushing in wasn’t, and Jimmy hurried to close the window with a silenced thump.
Now. For the toy.
Jimmy Listened to the room around him. The pounding of the rain, the settling of the building, the noise from the tavern, the movement of Scott in the next room over, and the way all the sounds echoed into nothing or were absorbed formed a picture of the room.
There was a bedside table to Jimmy’s left, where Jimmy expected to find the toy, but it wasn’t there. Jimmy stuttered a moment and swept over the room again. There was no toy.
Baffled and a little panicked, Jimmy Listened to the other rooms. The cleaned ones had toys on their bedside tables.
Where was this room’s?
Jimmy was so caught up in his panic he didn’t Hear Scott exit the room he was working on, floorboards tapping under his boots in a beeline for the room Jimmy was searching, or the click of the lock. He did, however, Hear the doorknob turn.
Now more than a little panicked, Jimmy tried to both hide himself and open the window at the same time. He succeeded at neither.
“What the—!”
Jimmy froze. There was a long moment where all he could focus on was Scott’s startled breathing, the shifting cloth in his hand—oh hey, there was the toy—and the rapid blinking.
“Huh, I’ve never met someone easy on one eye and hard on the other.”
What.
--
When Scott starting housekeeping the hotel rooms, he wasn’t expecting to find a… thing in one of them that made his magical eye burn until he shut it. He certainly wasn’t expecting the first thing to come out of his mouth to be a flirt.
In his defense, he did just get back from trading with Sausage. It was on his mind. The flirting, not… whatever that was.
The thing—bird? Avian? They looked a lot like an avian, if Scott ignored the sheer number of wings and the parts he couldn’t focus on. The avian turned their blindfolded eyes—the only facial feature Scott could make out—directly at Scott. A black pickaxe was slipped from their belt and struck the floor. Scott gaped at it—was that a pickaxe made of coal? You could do that?—and the cracks that spread from it, forming words.
Why are you like this.
Scott laughed. He didn’t know what else to do.
“You miss one hundred percent of the shots you don’t take.” Scott said brightly. Screw it, he was leaning into it. Flirt with the bizarre avian, why not. It’d be a cool story if nothing else. He was already stuck winking at them.
The avian shook their head slowly.
“Can I help you with anything?” Scott asked politely. He glanced over at the window, the avian’s hand still on the sill, obviously their entrance point. Water shone on the just-cleaned floor below it and Scott frowned at it in annoyance.
“You know, most people use the door,” Scott scolded. “We’re not cheap but we’re willing to consider alternative methods of payment if you can’t afford it.”
With robes like that, Scott figured they could pay it regardless. He was… pretty sure they were robes. They glittered with golden embroidery, that had to mean wealth. Not even the three gold-obsessed emperors wore gold like that.
The pickaxe tapped the floor again, erasing the previous cracks and replacing them with more words.
I’m not here for a room, I need the toy.
Scott blinked at the words and down at the toy he’d forgotten to put in the room in the first place.
“They typically come with the room.” Scott told them.
The pickaxe hit the floor a little harsher. It was only then Scott noticed the taps were completely silent. He cracked open his magical eye to watch the words form. Telling magic types apart was difficult, but Scott was confident he had never seen this type before. He couldn’t even commit any details to memory. Odd.
I need. The toy. Now.
“Demanding. This isn’t a situation where I appreciate that. It’s a setting, but not a situation.” Scott crossed his arms and considered the wisdom of arguing with… whatever this was. And continuing to flirt, as the avian facepalmed.
“I mean, I’d be happy to sell it to you,” Scott offered. “I’m just very baffled. There’s a Toy Barn in Joel’s empire—”
Better you than Joel.
“…I mean, fair,” Scott said after a long moment. “Joel is a handful.”
The avian held out a hand—presumably a hand—and made a grabby motion.
“Hang on, you gotta pay.” Scott tucked the toy behind his back. “I’m not giving these out for free, Joel drives a hard bargain.”
Scott couldn’t see their face, somehow, despite it pointed right at him, but he got the feeling he was being given a flat look.
You give them out for free though.
“Yeah, that’s a bit of a lie. The cost of the room covers the toy,” Scott admitted. “I’ll give you the toy—just the toy, if you really don’t want a room—for three diamonds.”
The avian’s hand jerked, dragging the pickaxe across the floor. Three diamonds?!
“I have to buy them for two diamonds apiece! I gotta make a profit!” Scott said.
Three diamonds for a toy!
“Take it up with Joel!” Scott threw his free hand in the air. “If it bugs you that much, go buy from him. It’s only two diamonds there. Be lucky I’m not charging you for breaking in!”
The avian was still for a ten count.
I don’t have that on me.
“Well, go get it then,” Scott said cheerfully. He moved away from the door and gestured out. “Maybe use the door this time?”
I need it NOW. It’s an emergency.
“What kind of emergency do you have? A crying child?” Scott demanded.
Yes. Absolutely.
Scott squinted at the avian. It took them a moment too long for comfort to answer.
“I don’t believe you.”
The avian tilted their head.
IOU?
Scott raised an eyebrow. “And what guarantee do I get?”
The avian hesitated and slowly offered the coal pickaxe. Scott’s eye widened.
“You know, that looks plenty good.” Scott said hastily. He held out the toy and stepped further into the room to take it. “If you decide you can’t pay off the diamonds, I can just keep—”
Yeah that’s not happening. It’s MINE.
Scott snickered. “Nice pun.”
The avian paused and quickly tapped the floorboards again.
That was not the intention.
Stop laughing.
Scott pursed his lips. “Fine. One pick IOU three diamonds for a Sheriff toy.”
Scott tossed over the toy and accepted the pickaxe. Its handle was smooth as silk and Scott couldn’t get a comfortable grip no matter how he held it. Touching the blade left smudges of coal over Scott’s fingers. He didn’t need his magical eye to tell him about the power coming off it, power that left him tingly all the way up to the shoulders and whispered something he couldn’t make out in his ears. His eyes felt heavy. Scott suddenly wondered if this was really a good idea.
The avian nodded at Scott. They opened the window and jumped out before Scott could tell them off. They didn’t even have the decency to close it behind them. When Scott went to shut the window and yell at the avian, he found no trace of them in the clearing sky.
Scott swallowed and closed the window. He hurried to put the pickaxe in his collection, to enjoy it while it lasted, and it vanished along the way. Scott stared at his abruptly empty hands outside his house and quietly cursed.
--
Jimmy didn’t like his makeshift vessel. It wasn’t prepped for him, for one, filled with magic that whispered of Joel, and it was too stiff with newness. He tugged the hat, with its paltry badge that wasn’t even metal, over his unpatched forehead and regretted everything.
Joey noticed the cloth badges and Jimmy spit out an excuse of fWhip replacing them as a prank. Joey bought it, laughing loudly at Jimmy’s expense, and the rest of the meeting went by smoothly. He didn’t seem to notice how stiff Jimmy was, or how new his body looked, or the subtle details that marked his vessel as made by Joel, and the meeting turned out in Jimmy’s favor.
But, because the multiverse hated him, Sausage swept in for his own business with Joey and Jimmy couldn’t make an escape fast enough to avoid Sausage popping up in his face to greet him. His eyes slid over Jimmy and noted, with the voice Jimmy could never tell meant he knew or was just making a genuinely innocent comment, that Jimmy was looking different today. Joey saved him by gleefully sharing the story of fWhip replacing the badges. Sausage laughed along, but looked over Jimmy again, a curious glint in his eye, and Jimmy went cold with the realization that Sausage was a drama-loving gossip and word was getting back to fWhip, one way or another, to say nothing of the whole server.
Jimmy made his excuses and left. He could feel Sausage’s eyes on him until he was out of sight.
Maybe he could convince fWhip he assumed the culprit was fWhip. It would make a mess out of his reputation, no good law-enforcer jumped to conclusions, but better his rep than his secret.
Jimmy took extra care that night to tuck his vessel away when he went to create proper vessels. He spent three full days on four of them, only stopping to occasionally be seen doing things so he wouldn’t alert the others to his mysterious absence.
Once the toys were done, Jimmy had a choice. He could pay the diamonds, or he could just continue pretending it never happened—Scott didn’t know who the person in his hotel was after all, and the pickaxe returned to Jimmy once he entered his vessel. But the disaster would be an even bigger disaster if it wasn’t for Scott, and Jimmy would rather his Listener side stay in Scott’s good graces. Scott was petty and Jimmy didn’t want him finding out about the Listener stuff anymore than he wanted Joel to, so Scott would absolutely get him back if he ever saw a chance. If Jimmy needed an emergency replacement vessel again, that was not ideal.
So Jimmy spent another day digging up three diamonds and debating how to get them to Scott. To show up as Sheriff Jimmy and say he found them in Tumble Town in a chest marked for Scott? No, too suspicious. Why give them to Jimmy when they could be given to Scott himself?
Straight to the correct person it was then, but how to do that? Show up as a Listener? And risk someone else catching him? Joel and fWhip were neighbors with Scott. Showing up as the Sheriff had its own previously mentioned problems…
Under the cover of night then, when everyone was asleep and Jimmy could drop off a chest with no one else the wiser. It was the perfect plan.
--
“What’s been going on?” Scott grinned at Sausage over his coffee. The café was small but they were safely tucked in the corner, where they could exchange all the hot gossip and scandalous details without anyone overhearing.
“Oh it’s been crazy!” Sausage paused to take of bite of his cookie. Scott kept his impatience off his face and took a loud, slow slurp. Sausage immediately caved.
“Jimmy looks different, recently.”
“Oh?” Scott raised an eyebrow. “fWhip give him a new scar?”
“No no, that’s the strange thing! He appears to be missing the scar!” Sausage watched Scott closely.
“Huh.” Scott swirled his coffee. “He is a toy, he probably got a repair.”
“Oh he got an overhaul! He looks all shiny and new! Almost like right at the start! Crazy, huh?”
“That is crazy.” Scott eyed Sausage, who was leaning over the table, practically bursting with more news. “Sausage, you’re hurting yourself more than me.”
A lie, but Scott had the better poker face so no one could ever prove anything.
Sausage giggled. “His badge is missing!”
“Sausage, that’s old news.”
“No no! Not the deputy badge; the Sheriff badge! The one he always wears. The one on his hat too! And his belt buckle.”
Scott paused and slowly put his cup down. “Huh?”
“Mhm.” Sausage nodded. “He says they were stolen and replaced with cloth by fWhip, but I talked with him just an hour later and he said he never did that! He was so surprised!”
“Did Jimmy get it wrong?” Scott asked.
“That’s what I thought at first! But then I started thinking more, and I realized something…” Sausage took another bite of his cookie and a long sip of his coffee. Scott flicked his stirring stick across the table, more wound up than he wanted to admit.
Sausage coughed on his drink. “Okay! Okay! Jimmy looks exactly like the toys Joel makes! Down to the stitch!”
“What?” Scott gaped.
“I know! At first I thought, why would he do that? If he was gonna change his look wouldn’t he go for looking less like them? And then I thought: what if that isn’t Jimmy at all?” Sausage leaned forward again, eyes bright. “What if one of Joel’s toys gained sentience and overthrew Jimmy as the new Sheriff? Like the Buzzes in the second movie?”
Scott turned that over his head. “Well… that wouldn’t be the weirdest thing that’s happened.” Scott’s mind flashed back to the whole human Owen fiasco.
“Yeah! I’m gonna ask Joel when he drops off Hermes tomorrow, see what he thinks. Hopefully we won’t have a whole toy war on our hands as they all fight to be the ‘real’ Sheriff.”
“Yeah… hopefully.” Scott agreed.
“So.” Sausage cupped his chin his hands, grinning at Scott. “What’s up with you?”
Scott chuckled. “Oh I had the weirdest thing happen in my hotel the other day…”
--
Jimmy wished he could teleport. Unfortunately, doing that within servers was not something he was good at, especially under stress, and he flew to Chromia normally. He felt every second passing by as the moon slowly set.
Finally, Chromia came into view below and Jimmy circled down. He landed in a clump of grass near silently, wincing at the barest trace of sound. Once you could make no sound at all, anything was too loud.
Jimmy eyed Scott’s house. There were no lights on in the house, or any nearby houses. Despite both eyes working perfectly, Jimmy felt more blind with them than with his Listener abilities. He crossed his fingers, praying the multiverse didn’t hate him for the third time that week.
Jimmy took out a chest, set it as close to the front door as he could, and carefully placed the toy in it, resting the diamonds on the plush so it could muffle any rattling around. Once satisfied with that, Jimmy closed the chest, cringing at the creaking of the hinges. Chests were always so loud.
Jimmy held the lid for a long minute, listening for any hint he was heard. When no one made themselves apparent, Jimmy took out a sign and set it on the chest.
Here are the diamonds as promised! I even returned your toy in perfect condition!
Jimmy took a step back and nodded at the chest. Perfect.
It wasn’t until Jimmy was halfway home that he realized Scott would recognize the handwriting as his.
Jimmy cursed the multiverse and made the sharpest U-turn he’d ever made in his life. If he had a flesh-and-blood body he’d have gotten whiplash.
Jimmy stumbled to a landing, wincing and pleading under his breath. The chest was undisturbed. Jimmy whispered a prayer of thanks. He snatched the sign and turned to take off.
His eyes met Scott’s.
--
Scott wished he could say he was getting home so late because he was having fun, but the truth was he had the opposite of fun.
If there was one thing Scott disliked, it was paperwork. However, it came with the territory of running a town, so Scott didn’t have a choice. There was only so much legal stuff he could con. Usually, this culminated in Scott leaving the paperwork until the last minute and doing it all at once. Healthy? No. Helpful? Certainly not! But it worked out well so far, so why not?
“I’m barely thirty, why does my back hurt so much.” Scott grumbled to himself. He slowly sat up and stretched, his back popping like fireworks. If he was wearing wings he wouldn’t even need rockets to go flying into the wall.
Scott rubbed his smushed face and looked around. The desk lantern was on, stained glass sending pretty colors around the otherwise dark room, the curtains that had been closed to block out distraction filtering moonlight into the room. The clock on the wall declared it to be almost three in the morning.
“Ah. That’s why.” Scott buried his face in his hands and considered if it was really worth walking down the road in the cool night just to fall asleep again. He shifted in his seat and decided yes, yes it was.
So Scott, yawning large enough to swallow a Stratos island, shoved papers into vaguely organized piles, clicked the light off, and left.
Scott yawned again as he turned the last corner and paused. Was that… was that Jimmy in front of his house? At three in the morning? Why? What was wrong with the man?
“You saw nothing!” Jimmy blurted. His badge gleamed in the dim light as he shot into the sky.
Scott blinked slowly after him. “I am way too tired for this.”
When he tried to open the door, he stumbled over a chest. Scott blamed not noticing it on his tiredness and kicked it into the house to deal with in the morning.
Scott tripped over the chest again in the morning. It was a rude way to jog his memory.
Scott studied the chest. There was no indication who it was from, though there were markings that suggested there used to be a sign on it. Scott curiously opened it.
Blue sparkled up at him, scattered around a toy Sheriff.
Scott took out the toy. It was in excellent condition, clean enough only a very close inspection revealed traces of wear and tear. He could probably put it back in the hotel and no one would be the wiser. Scott scooped out the diamonds and counted them. Three, freshly mined judging from the traces of stone dust.
“Huh. Whaddaya know.” He didn’t expect to get the payment, and he certainly didn’t expect the toy back. Scott turned to put the diamonds away and a thought occurred to him.
Why was Jimmy outside his door in the middle of the night? The same night he got payment from the strange avian no less?
Scott turned back to the chest. It gave him nothing more than he already knew.
“Jimmy looks different, recently.”
Scott rewound his memories, heart pounding. No, that was definitely Jimmy. He distinctly remembered the metal flash. Looking down at the toy in his hand, one bought directly from Joel, confirmed there was no metal on it. And it wouldn’t make sense anyway, for a replacement Sheriff to give him Jimmy and three diamonds.
Not that it made much sense if it was Jimmy doing the giving either. Was he working with the avian? That made a bit more sense, especially the part about preferring Scott over Joel, but why the toy? Was he planning something to stop Joel? Or did he catch wind of the exchange and try to steal the diamonds and burn the toy?
Scott’s comm buzzed and he gratefully set the toy aside to focus on something else.
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: Scott. Scott, Sausage told me about your visitor
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: What exactly happened?
Bemused, Scott sent him the details. Joel was silent for so long Scott almost thought he wasn’t getting an answer.
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: Scott. I need you to pay very close attention to what I’m going to say.
Scott slowly put down the bread he was preparing for breakfast.
You whispered to Joel Smallishbeans: I’m listening.
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: Scott that was a Listener, one of the most powerful Beings in all the universes. They spy on worlds for entertainment, even twisting things around if they aren’t exciting enough, and they Hear everything. DO NOT talk about them aloud.
Scott’s mouth went dry.
You whispered to Joel Smallishbeans: You’re joking right?
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: I wish. I don’t stand a chance if I went against one. I don’t know what they wanted with that toy or why they were so willing to bargain, but they’re dangerous. Doubly so if they have a Watcher with them, who Sees all, so even writing might not be safe.
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: Actually I lied, I might have an idea about why they wanted the toy.
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: Sausage told you about his toy war theory?
You whispered to Joel Smallishbeans: He did… are you suggesting they have something to do with that?
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: Remember when I said they twist things if they don’t think they’re interesting enough? A toy war sounds just up their alley.
You whispered to Joel Smallishbeans: I saw Jimmy just last night! Early this morning, whatever, I saw him! He had metal badges.
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: What were you two doing so late?
You whispered to Joel Smallishbeans: I fell asleep in my office and was heading home, he was standing in front of my house, said something about it never happening, and flew off. There was a chest in front of my house too, it had the diamonds and the toy I gave the avian Listener whatever.
You whispered to Joel Smallishbeans: I don’t know if Jimmy was dropping them off or trying to take them or what
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: Oh no
You whispered to Joel Smallishbeans: What? What kind of oh no is that?
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: You just confirmed Jimmy has a direct connection with the Listener. They’re definitely doing something and it has to do with Jimmy.
You whispered to Joel Smallishbeans: What do we do?
Joel Smallishbeans whispered to you: Make a group chat with everyone but Jimmy in it, duh
--
Jimmy stared at the fire he burned the sign in. Everywhere he turned, the mess was just getting bigger and bigger.
Maybe Scott wouldn’t remember. Maybe he was too tired or thought it was a dream. Maybe he saw the sign, saw the contents, and was checking if Jimmy was still around to yell about him being a liar and a thief and—
Everything was going wrong. Jimmy’s secret was going to be out of the bag if this kept up.
His comm buzzed.
Jimmy went ramrod stiff. He bounced around the idea of ignoring it but that made the pit in his stomach, already worsened by the sound, to get deeper. So with shaking hands, Jimmy checked his comm.
It was Katherine. Jimmy sagged with relief.
Katherine whispered to you: Hey Jimmy! I have some extra string from a project, can I bring it over for your cats?
Jimmy grinned and sent a delighted confirmation to her. Playing with Norman and Flick sounded like an excellent idea.
Katherine showed up a few minutes later, a whole basket of string and a witch with her. Jimmy spluttered over the sheer amount of it.
“Katherine! What kind of project were you working on?” Jimmy gaped.
“Oh, this is actually several projects’ worth, I just realized how full it was.” Katherine laughed. “And I thought, hey, Jimmy’s cats would get a kick out this! So I brought it all.”
“Yeah! They can pick out their favorite colors!” Shelby beamed.
“Aw! Thank you guys!” Jimmy beamed. He could already feel his stress melting away.
The cats were as delighted with the string as Katherine thought they would be, and the three emperors had just as fun a time dangling the strings and competing for the cats’ attention. Jimmy’s stitches felt ready to burst with laughter before the hour was up.
“Hey Jimmy?” Katherine asked, watching Shelby spin in a circle, a string in each hand and both cats running around her.
“Yeah?” Jimmy tilted his head up at her.
“How are you doing? I haven’t seen much of you the past few days.” Katherine was watching him out of the corner of her eye.
Jimmy forced himself not to stiffen. “I’m fine. Just busy! You know how it is!”
Jimmy’s voice was far too fast, but he couldn’t make himself slow down. Katherine noticed. She turned to face him.
“Jimmy.” She said, gently, so gently, and it made Jimmy even more nervous. He glanced over at Shelby. She was still spinning, but slower. She was clearly trying to look like she wasn’t listening.
“You know if you ever need help with anything, you can come to me, right? Or any of us?” Katherine said.
Jimmy nodded, not meaning it. He’d thought about asking her for replacement vessels before, as the tailor of the emperors and the only person left Jimmy would trust with a Deputy badge, but… that would mean explaining.
“I do mean anything.” Katherine was keeping a solid line of eye contact and Jimmy couldn’t look away without looking guilty. “You have my axe at your back!”
“Thanks Katherine, I’ll keep that in mind.” Jimmy smiled wanly at her and picked up a string.
“So everything’s okay? Nothing’s wrong?” Katherine prodded.
“No,” Jimmy said, a little harsher than he meant to. He toned it down. “No, nothing’s wrong. I promise.”
And then, because he just couldn’t keep his mouth shut: “Why?”
“Oh, no reason! Just-just being buddies!” Katherine grinned at him too brightly and dug out her comm.
Katherine whispered to you: There’s some rumors
Jimmy froze. He didn’t dare look up.
There’s some rumors.
Katherine whispered to you: The Sheriff toys are apparently gaining sentience and trying to impersonate you? And there’s something called a Listener on the server, do you know anything about that?
“Get out,” Jimmy snapped. Surprise and hurt flashed on Katherine’s face. “Get out of my house, right now.”
“Jimmy—”
“I said out!” Jimmy stood up and glared at her with his might. If he had a heart it would be beating out of his chest. He was barely aware what he was saying, he only knew he needed them out.
They knew about the Listener they knew about the Listener they knew about the Listener they knew—
Katherine gathered up her string. Jimmy grabbed an armful and tossed it in—out out he needed them out—and felt the tingle of magic sweep through his fibers, searching. He whipped around to see Shelby, wand still out and pointed right at him.
“What did you do?” Jimmy yelled at her. His panic spiked higher—Shelby was more powerful than she realized, there was a chance she could pick up what he was and then—
“I-I was just—the Listener, they’re doing something—they’re trying to start a toy war with fake Sheriffs—”
“Get! Out!” Jimmy shoved the basket toward the door—stupid, stupid little body, why didn’t he put in the extra effort to make a bigger one, he wanted to push the women out the door but he couldn’t—
Katherine scooped up her basket and then they were gone, the wee of their rockets fading into the distance. Jimmy sagged to the floor.
Everything was going wrong. Everything was going terribly wrong.
--
Shelby: I couldn’t tell what it was, but there was definitely some weird magic in Jimmy. It was… buried, almost, like it was hiding. It was hiding, actually. You could hold a sword to my neck and I wouldn’t be able to tell you anything about the magic though, like you said Scott
Katherine: And you should have seen his face, he looked so scared!
Pixlriffs: So something’s definitely up then.
Joel Smallishbeans: I told you!
False Symmetry: So what do we do about it? How do we stop this Listener guy?
Joel Smallishbeans: I have no idea. That’s a Listener, I’m nothing compared to them!
Lizzie Shadowlady: Then we’ll have to improvise. Could we dump them into the Void?
Scott Smajor: Lizzie they have wings
Lizzie Shadowlady: Cut them off then!
Joel Smallishbeans: IT DOESN’T WORK LIKE THAT
--
Jimmy hugged his knees to his chest, tucked between Norman and Flick. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been like that, but he was terrified and he couldn’t think of a good solution.
All he could come up with was leaving, and he didn’t want to leave. He didn’t want to lose his friendships. Maybe he could ask Grian for help getting rid of their memories of this, but the thought of messing with his friends like that, even if it made everything better, made Jimmy’s cotton twist.
He groaned and buried his face in his knees. Why couldn’t anything be simple? He was an eldritch being, one of the half-trained fledglings who overthrew the previous Watchers, he shouldn’t have ever gotten into this position in the first place!
Jimmy was so lost in thought he didn’t notice several people landing outside his house until they knocked on his door.
“Jimmy?” Pix called. “You in there?”
Jimmy squeaked. He buried himself further into his cats, who stirred but allowed him to hide.
“Maybe he’s out.” Gem suggested.
“No, he’s in there. I heard him.” fWhip declared, and oh, Jimmy never thought he would want to throttle his former deputy more than the time he spawncamped Jimmy in his own jail, but he really really wanted to throttle him.
“Let me—” The porch creaked as peoples shuffled, and then Scott knocked firmly on the door. “Jimmy, can we come in? It’s really important!”
Jimmy couldn’t speak. He was in his vessel and he couldn’t speak, frozen where he was like he was in his true form and simply waiting for loitering Players to move so he could interact without consequence.
“Are you sure he’s in there?” Scott asked.
“Yes! I heard him make a noise!”
“Let me try something.” The porch creaked again as Joey stepped forward. The doorknob turned and he cheerfully shoved the door open. “Half the time the door is unlocked when you don’t expect it to be!”
“…That works too.” Joel muttered. In a louder voice, he called for Jimmy. Jimmy was practically under his cats by this point, and they were getting annoyed with him.
“Jimmy? This is serious, you need to come out!” Katherine pleaded.
“Do you two know where Jimmy is?” Sausage asked the cats and Jimmy barely kept from whimpering.
Norman, Flick, if you rat me out that’s no cat treats for a MONTH, Jimmy thought. But the multiverse hated him and his cats weren’t telepathic.
Flick meowed.
“Oh. Oh dear.” Sausage murmured.
“What? Where is he?” Gem asked.
“Is he hurt? Are we too late?” Oli panicked.
Flick stretched and wandered over to Lizzie. Norman lifted his head, decided he didn’t want to go to her but was done with Jimmy, and hopped up on a window sill. Jimmy was left on the chair in full view of twelve emperors. He squeaked again.
“Jimmy! There you are! We need to talk.” Joel was in his smaller form and he crouched to be at eye level with Jimmy. He typed into his comm as he spoke. “We’re supposed to have that meeting, remember?”
There was no meeting scheduled. Jimmy would have remembered that, because every thought of interacting with his friends set him more on edge.
Joel held out his comm. The words on it blinked.
Are you hurt? Do you know what the Listener is planning?
Jimmy stared at the comm. He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what to do.
“Jimmy?” Joel prodded. “Hey, you okay?”
“I’m fine.” Jimmy forced himself to say. His voice wobbled. “Everything’s fine, can you-can you go? Please?”
The other emperors looked even more concerned and exchanged looks that made Jimmy ball his fists.
“But the meeting?” Joel showed his comm again. What did they do to you? How do we get you out of it?
“There is no meeting.” Jimmy snapped. “There is no meeting because I would have remembered having to interact with you all because I’m the Listener and I just needed a temporary vessel but Scott caught me and now you’re all panicking and trying to save me from myself and I just wanted to be normal and-and-and-and—!”
Jimmy burst into tears.
--
Scott had never seen Jimmy cry before. He hadn’t even known he could cry, with actual tears and everything. They weren’t like any tears he’d seen before. His eye told him they were unidentifiable magic, the same way the Listener was magic, and they glittered and shone with Scott’s inability to really focus on them, just like the Listener.
The Listener… who was Jimmy.
Scott would rather think more about the tears, thank you.
“What? You can’t be the List—” Joel cut himself off and furiously typed in his comm. Scott caught a glimpse of the screen, a misspelled mess of Joel protesting he would have noticed such a thing.
Jimmy shook his head. His eyes were tight shut, not letting him see the screen but he seemed to get the idea. He was crying so hard he could hardly speak, but he attempted anyway, blubbering about broken vessels and gunpowder meetings and uncomfortable toys.
“And n-n-now you’re-re-re all-ll-ll-ll scared of me an-an-and I-I don’t know wh-what t-to d-do, please don’t ha-hate me!” Jimmy wailed. He completely broke down after that, crying too hard to say anything.
Scott gaped like a grounded fish. At some point he closed his magic eye from the growing stain of tears on Jimmy’s hands. His head spun, for no reason connected to the tears other than the proof they offered.
Oli sighed and marched up to Jimmy’s chair. He scooped Jimmy up in his hands and pat his back. “There there.”
Jimmy screeched and flailed in Oli’s hands. Scott wasn’t the only one gaping at Oli.
“Oli! Put him down!” Katherine snapped.
“What? Someone has to comfort him! Lot of help you lot are, standing around like idiots.” Oli scolded them.
“Put me down!” The indignation of being picked up apparently returned Jimmy’s ability to speak. Scott only knew of two people allowed to pick Jimmy up, Katherine and fWhip, and fWhip hadn’t been allowed since he got fired. Scott totally wasn’t jealous he wasn’t on that list, no, not at all. It was fine.
Oli dropped Jimmy back on the chair. Jimmy fumbled for his footing and gave up, flopping against the arm to rub at his face. His tears were slowing down. He looked up at them, nothing but terror on his face. Scott’s brain finally kicked into gear.
“Jimmy.” Scott nudged Joel out of the way, but he was so shocked he just fell over. Scott eyed him and decided someone else could deal with him. Lizzie poked Joel with her claws. Scott turned back to Jimmy.
“No one hates you.”
“You-you don’t?” Jimmy stared at him in shock.
“Of course not!” Katherine cried. “We just wanted to keep you safe and it turns out the only danger was us! We’re really sorry.”
“I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have scanned you without your permission.” Shelby rubbed her arm.
Scott nodded along. “I’m also sorry, Jimmy.”
“But how?” Joel spluttered. “I never—how—are you serious? You’re the Listener?”
Jimmy’s eye flicked over to Joel. He gave a tiny nod.
“I didn’t want anyone to know.” Jimmy whispered. His eyes welled with more tears. “I was—I just wanted to fit in.”
“You’re not lying?” False asked. “This isn’t a trick to throw us off the scent? Or something?”
“False!” Sausage cried.
“What?” False demanded. “Joel said these guys were dangerous, I’m not taking chances!”
“It’s not a lie! It’s not, I—” Jimmy hesitated and stood up, making a shooing motion at Scott. Scott backed up. Jimmy wavered for a second. And something drew from him, expanding out as the Sheriff dropped lifeless.
Scott choked on his breath. Part of it was how wrong it was, to see Jimmy so limp and blank, part of it was the explosion of magic filling Scott’s eye. He squeezed it shut and tried not to stare.
It was definitely the guy from the hotel. Jimmy was definitely the guy from the hotel. His wings curled around him like he was trying to hide, and his face was turned away, though not enough to hide the obvious tear tracks leaking under the blindfold. The pickaxe slipped through Jimmy’s hands to thump soundlessly against the ground.
Ta-da?
“…Ah. It’s not a trick.” False clutched the handle of her sword uneasily.
Jimmy folded back up a second later and the toy regained life.
“I don’t want to hurt anyone!” Jimmy blurted. “I’m not like the old guys, I just want to live my life! Please, you have to believe me!”
“We believe you.” Scott soothed. The tears had vanished from Jimmy’s… vessel… when Jimmy withdrew from it, but his eyes were welling up again. Scott slowly reached out to brush the tears away and was mildly surprised when Jimmy let him. He was so small. How did such a form fit into that? “Right guys?”
The crowd of emperors shuffled awkwardly and voiced their agreements. Jimmy sagged, tears building up again, this time with relief.
“Thank you!” Jimmy whispered.
“So you’re not—we don’t—” Joel made some very confused noises that had Scott raise an eyebrow. He sounded like a cartoon. Jimmy actually rolled his eyes.
“Joel, I don’t care what you’ve done to me. I don’t care if you keep going. It doesn’t matter. It really doesn’t.” Jimmy said flatly. He turned hesitant a second later, peering fearfully at them from under his hat. “You… you guys aren’t going to treat me differently, are you? I don’t want… can we forget this ever happened? Please?”
“I don’t know how we’re supposed to forget something like this, but if that’s what you want.” Pix said slowly. “Though… could I get an exception for an interview? I am very curious about Listener and Watcher culture.”
Jimmy burst into laughter. “Sure, why not? I’m not going to be very helpful though, we threw all the old guys and their stuff in the Void.”
“Oh! That’s-that’s great!” Joel’s voice turned high and squeaky. “So we don’t have to worry about anyone spying on us?”
“Nope!” Jimmy thought about it and grumbled, “most of the time. My siblings are… nosy. And like to mess with me. But they should leave you guys alone!”
“Oh, how… how nice!”
Jimmy nodded. “Um. So… so we’re all good?”
“Yeah, we’re good!” Joel squeaked. The rest of the emperors gave less squeaky confirmations.
“Then… can you guys go please? I think… I am done with people right now.” Jimmy slowly curled into himself.
“Yeah, of course!” Scott stood up and dragged Joel from the floor. “Bye Jimmy! Sorry again!”
Scott tried to hurry out the door without looking like he was hurrying. There was… a lot he needed to process now. And he didn’t want to process it.
That paperwork was looking pretty appealing all of a sudden.