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Chapter Text

Steven looked around the room "So, I'm guessing, this is Mom's room...DUH!" said Steven "I think I need to sit down for a while..." and then, from behind Steven, a chair rose up as if hastily yet professionally constructed.

"Oh! Well, that's convenient!" said Steven. He then noticed something small sticking its head out from the leg of the chair and hid itself. "What the hell was that?" said Steven. He stopped and thought for a moment.

"You know what? Chairs are so old fashioned, how about a couch?" Steven suggested. Nothing happened. "A beanbag chair?" Nothing. "Oh! Then just a cushion then!" said Steven.

The chair then quickly sunk into the ground and then formed a cushion, Steven stood up and lifted up the cushion "Ah-ha!" He saw the little grey things again and they sunk back in from where they were sticking their heads out from. 

"Okay, now I gotcha! I wanna hole from which I can see you all in this wall!" said Steven as a hole opened in the wall and he peaked in "Here's Johnny!" he said to the tiny little gems inhabiting the inner workings of the room. 

The tiny gems then panicked. "What? Did I forget to brush my teeth?" asked Steven "uh, sorry to scare you?" "Sorry?" said the voice of one of the little gems. "Is it?" asked another one. "It IS her!" said a third one with a playful giggle.

The tiny gems began to surround Steven. "Why does she look so different?" One of them cut a hole through the wall and lifted Steven's shirt and inspected his gem "She's back!" All the small gems celebrated and all leapt on Steven.

"Pinkie! She's back! Our Diamond! Pink! Pink!" A small gem announced. All the tiny gems were climbing all over Steven like he was a playground "Whoa whoa! Easy there fellas!" said Steven.

"Whoa! What's this long thing down here?" a small gem said. Steven reached into his pants and pulled out one of them "Hey! Stay outta there!" said Steven "who the hell are all of you anyway!?"

"Very funny pink!" said The Small Gem in a pink dress and it's...gemstone...? on her nose. A small tower rose Next to Steven "Always playing her games! Pretending not to know us pebbles" said a gruff looking member of the pebbles.

They reached into Steven's pocket and pulled out his phone and took their own picture with it. "How did you figure out how to use that thing, like, right away?" asked Steven. Steven looked around at all the pebbles.

"Now that I got a good look at you, you guys are kind of cute" said Steven. Suddenly the door opened, frightening all the pebbles as they scurried into their hiding places. He then noticed Pearl come in.

"Pearl! Boy, am I glad to see you!" said Steven. "Steven!" said Pearl as she ran in to hug Steven "Oh thank the stars! You're okay! What did White Diamond do!? Did she hurt you!?" 

"No, I'm okay...she was all "welcome home" but not in a nice way, in a dismissive, rude, way" said Steven "Pearl, I take back every bad thing I've said about you, White Diamond is the biggest bitch in the universe! And I ain't just talking physical size, I could already tell just by listening to her talk! I don't think she understands I'm not Pink Diamond. Wait! Connie, Rebecca! Garnet and Amethyst! Where are they!?"

"Still on the ship and I can assure you nothing's happened to them" said Pearl as she took out Steven's duffel bag "I'm only here because I was sent to bring you your things...and they consider me one of your things..."

Steven had a mischievous expression back then "Alright, where should I put you? By my nightstand? Pearl, sit! Stay...roll over!" "Go ahead, Steven, keep that up and find out what happens..." said Pearl as she took out a riding crop from her gem.

"S-sorry ma'am..." Steven apologized "so...remember when you said not all pearls know each other last year?" "Yeah, I lied...I knew the other Diamonds Pearls...me and Blue Diamond's Pearl get along fine...but I can't stand Yellow Diamond's Pearl...!"

The Yellow Diamond chime played, unbeknownst to Pearl and Yellow Pearl walked in "I just can't stand that stuck up pencil-necked snob!" Pearl continued "I tell you, Steven, Yellow Diamond's Pearl is just so infuriating! She is such a suck up! If Yellow Diamond had a digestive system, you can bet her pearl's nose would be more brown than a chocolate bar!" 

"Uh, she's right behind you" said Steven. Pearl looked behind herself and yelped "aaaand that was my impression of a bad pearl!" she said nervously.

"I must say, your acting is quite spot on, I have no problem believing you're a bad pearl" Yellow Pearl answered with a smug grin, she then turned to Steven and cleared her throat.

"Pink Diamond, My Diamond has requested your presence in the Extraction chamber" Yellow Pearl announced. "You'll need your swimming trunks" Pearl advised

Chapter Text

Steven, wearing only his swim trunks and Pearl were led by Yellow Diamond's Pearl to a yellow hallway "So, uh, why am I in swimming trunks again?" "Trust me, Steven, it'll ruin your suit" said Pearl.

"Hmm, and that's the only one I got..." said Steven "Beach City can't a mayor with a ruined suit, I suppose. Alright." Steven looked around the hallway and noticed that parts of the wall were alive and whispering to each other.

They returned to a neutral position "Um, Hi?" said Steven. The Wall segment blushed. "Um, are parts of this hallway...alive?" asked Steven.

"Yes, Pink Diamond, those gems were made to be the walls of this hallway" said Yellow Pearl. "So...if their purpose is to just be a wall...what is even the point of giving them sentience?" asked Steven.

Unbeknownst to the group, one of the wall segments began looking at their own hands in existential dread "Oh my stars...." 

Eventually, they reached The Extraction Chamber Entrance, which was guarded by two Topazes. Yellow Diamond's Pearl stood aside and performed a Diamond Salute "Pink Diamond" she said.

"Oh, please, call me Steven" Steven answered. "No, just Steven" "Just Steven" "No!...wait, call me...Daddy" Steven said with a sly grin. "Pink Daddy" Yellow Pearl acknowledged. 

"Now say: Oh, Pink Daddy, you're so big" "Oh, Pink Daddy, you're so big" "No, say it more lustfully" Steven instructed. "Oh, Pink Daddy...you're so big!" Yellow Pearl said flirtatiously as instructed. 

"That will be all" said Steven as he snickered his way into The Extraction chamber "Have a nice extraction, Pink Daddy" which made Pearl snicker. "And just what are you laughing at, Big Nose?" said Yellow Pearl.

"Who're you calling "big nose", big nose?" said Pearl as she pushed her nose into Yellow Pearl's nose, the two glaring at each other angrily. 

Steven entered the room and realized why Pearl recommended the swimming trunks as the extraction chamber turned out to be a sauna, and Yellow Diamond was sitting on the other end, in full garb no less, as her clothing was part of her.

"Pink" Yellow greeted. "Oh, hey...cool sauna" said Steven. "It's new. Have a seat" said Yellow. Steven immediately sat down. "So, you met with White, how was it?" asked Yellow. 

"I hadn't been that creeped out since that one weird GameTerminal 3 commercial with the baby doll" said Steven "I barely got to say anything, All I got to say was: Um, Hi, and I."

"Two and a half words! That's a new record!" Yellow complimented. "But how am I gonna convince her to come help heal all the corrupted gems if she's not gonna let me get a word in?" asked Steven. 

"Hmm, good luck with that." said Yellow "White never leaves her own head these days. She never let's anyone in, except for you of course. I have hundreds of successful Crystal System colonies. But you get to see her because your ONE colony is a failure?"

"Shit happens" Steven shrugged "besides, saving billions of innocent lives is hardly what I call a failure." Yellow Diamond laughed "Saving billions of organic life is not a failure?! Oh Pink, you always did have quite a knack for making me laugh, you're almost worth the trouble!"

A chime was heard "Oh? Is it time already? Excuse me." Yellow Diamond squeezed all the sweat out from her body as it built up and went down the drain "Gross." said Steven.

"I've got to check up on the Citrine Production Reports" said Yellow. "God, I can see why Mom wanted leave all this behind, White's a bitch and Yellow's a freaking Karen!" Steven muttered. "What was that, Pink?" asked Yellow.

"Nothing!" said Steven. Yellow gave Steven a suspicious look but then left. Behind him came Blue Diamond's Pearl. "Pink Diamond, My Diamond has requested your presence" she said with a polite bow.

As Blue Pearl led Steven and Pearl down a blue hallway, Steven was talking about his experiences in Yellow's extraction chamber "So, she ditched me for some citrus report or something like that! Never got a word in edgewise."

"Yellow Diamond's like that, and she'll be like that for a while" said Pearl "she oversees all gem production on every single on of her colonies. And when she's not doing that, she's off with her army, conquering the next one."

"Proactive people suck" said Steven. "My Diamond will be waiting for you inside" said Blue Pearl, bowing down at the door. "I'll wait for you here" said Pearl.

"Alright, I think I can make leeway with Blue, see you in a bit" said Steven. Pearl waved as Steven went in. "Welcome back" said Blue Pearl. Steven went inside and saw Blue Diamond brushing her hair with a sentient comb.

"You'll never be alone-y, as long as you are combing" the comb sung.  Blue sighed deeply and then she noticed Steven "Oh! You're here!" Blue gently dropped the comb into a huge cup.

"Come in" Blue beckoned. "Don't mind if I do" Steven did a cannonball into the pool and burst out of the water "Ha ha! It's funny, I live right next to the ocean and yet here I am going into outer space to swim" said Steven. 

Blue chuckled heartily, making large ripples in the pool "Oh Pink, you've hardly changed. So silly. So small!" she sunk into the pool as Steven rose out of the water as Blue's knees rose up beneath his feet.

"Maybe I'm not small, maybe you're just really huge" Steven suggested, making Blue giggle. "I'm so glad your back...Steven!" said Blue. "Hey! You said my name!" said Steven. 

"Steven, Stee-von? What a funny sounding name" said Blue "you're so creative, Pink. So, what name did you give that little experiment of yours?" "Experiment?" asked Steven.

"You know, that partially blank gem that comes out of a human?" "You mean, Rebecca?" asked Steven. "Yes, her! Oh, her human gemstone is quite adorable" said Blue.

"No, Rebecca's the human, my daughter, the blank is Security Blankette. Rebecca named it that" said Steven.

"Oh, my mistake! Say, what did you use as a kindergarten in order to make her? What sort of land did you use?" asked Blue. "What? Connie's the one who gave birth to Rebecca" said Steven.

"You mean that human?! You used a human as a kindergarten?!" Blue exclaimed. "Well, I don't know if "used" is the correct term here, Rebecca's the result of more consensual circumstances" said Steven, trying to avoid the nitty gritty of the explanation of how Rebecca was made. 

"You must have had to use some sort of tiny injector for a human to serve as a kindergarten" said Blue. Steven felt almost insulted by that, he had to defend his manhood from that remark "Well, maybe for someone of your grandiose stature, I suppose it is rather small, but for an average human woman like Connie, I'd say it was pretty sizeable." 

"Oh! Do you remember when I let you name that batch of Pyrite "Fool's Gold?" Oh, White was so furious after that" said Blue. "Sorry, I don't remember" said Steven.

"Oh! Do you remember the game we used to play here?" asked Blue. Steven shook his head. "We had such fun together...You, Me, Yellow...and White..." said Blue. "We were all together here!?" asked Steven. 

"You would stand under the water and sing. And we would be above the surface trying to guess the song" said Blue. "Wow...Red too?" asked Steven. Blue lurched at the sound of her name. 

"Oh...that's right...you remember Red now..." said Blue "and you're...okay?" "Yeah, I mean, what memory I have of her is messed up, for the most part, yes" said Steven. 

"Well, Red wasn't as interested in the game...thinking back on it, I do remember rolling her eyes in disgust and disbelief every time we played that game" said Blue "after the incident, I've noticed a lot of small details in all my memories of the five of us..."

"I wonder what I must have done to make her hate me" Steven wondered, playing along with the fact that Blue thinks he's his mom.

"I don't know, but, after "the incident" I remembered how you would not leave your room, or speak or move at all..." said Blue "I used to check up on you frequently when you were in that catatonic state...that's when your original Pearl came forward and told me of all the bullying she did to you when me, Yellow or White weren't looking...she could have shattered you at any time...just like she did with all the others we found in her room!"

"Others!?" "Yes, when we inspected her room before we sealed off that part of The Palace, we saw thousands upon thousands of gem shards, all of them empty of any residual energy of the gems they once were"

Steven could tell Blue was getting more and more upset so he decided to switch the topic back to the subject of the game "So, tell me more of this game, maybe we can play it again and use that opportunity to convince White to come help us heal those gems on Earth?"

"No. We stopped coming here together after you left" said Blue "that was the start of Era 2. No one wanted to be here, not with your empty spot. It was so quiet..." Blue Diamond began tearing up, and so did Steven under her influence. 

"Well, I'm back now, perhaps we can help fix things, make 'em how they used to be?" Steven suggested. Suddenly, Blue Diamond's chime could be heard "Excuse me, My Diamond, but your next appointment." 

"Of course" Blue sighed. "Wait! We need to talk about White!" said Steven. "Later, perhaps" Blue Diamond climbed out of the pool as it began to drain, leaving Steven flat on his stomach at the bottom.

"At least she's not as bad as the other two..." said Steven. 

Chapter Text

"Ugh, I didn't make any progress, it's like the moment we returned to Homeworld, they stopped caring, as if all they wanted was Mom back!" said Steven "like, what was today, a spa day!?"

Steven was back in his mother's room talking about his experiences in Blue Diamond's Pool chamber "What did my mom even do here?" asked Steven "like, did she even have a duty here while the other diamonds were off doing who knows what!?" 

"Before her colony, she had massive balls" said Pearl. "Wh-what!?" Steven exclaimed. "Let me rephrase that, I meant she threw massive balls" said Pearl. "You mean she juggled?"

"No, "ball" as in party, she did juggle, but she would throw parties in celebration of the other diamond's accomplishments. Every member of every court would all come together to bask in the glory of all four diamonds" said Pearl.

"Five, actually" said Steven "Yellow and Blue pretty much confirmed that Red Diamond was in fact real on the ship." Pearl thought back to it "Oh my stars! You're right...but if Red Diamond was real then...no wonder a part of the Palace looked like it was blocked off." 

"Anyway, back to the balls...you said all four diamonds would be attending, does that mean even White?" asked Steven. "Oh yes...hm, I do wonder what became of Pink's court, though...that reminds me! Hang tight, I'll be back!" said Pearl. 

Pearl immediately ran off "Pearl wait!" but she was already gone "hmmm, I wanted to ask her about mom's first pearl that Blue mentioned...ah well, later...ugh, what have I gotten myself into?" 

Steven fell forward, knowing the pebbles would make a soft platform for him to land on "Am I supposed to be Pink Diamond now?! Hey, Pebbles? What was she like? What did she do? Why the hell do I feel like singing and why does this feel so..."

"...Familiar...why is this so familiar? Familiar, like something I used to know? 

Familiar, staring up at the ceiling? Familiar...I swear I know this feeling!"

Steven wandered through Pink Diamond's room, entering a strange corridor past all these gears and saw drawings Pink had made on these holographic panels.

"Where everyone wants me to be Mom, and everything I do, I do it wrong.

I'll sway 'em with a joke or a song, and maybe that'll help us get along..."

A single year shed from Steven and dropped on a non-sentient pebble in a bowl that suddenly came to life.

"Familiar, why is this so familiar? Familiar...like something I used to do...

Familiar...like she would throw a  tantrum...Insisting "Hey, I'm a diamond too!" 

I bet she'd drive them crazy all the time. They love her but they're leaving her behind.

With more important places they should be, than hanging out with someone like me...!"

As Steven stepped out the room, the pebbles who were singing along were making an exact replica of Pink Diamond's outfit for Steven.

Each segment of the out fit was placed on Steven, unbeknownst to him.

"Familiar! That's why it's so familiar! Familiar, like someone I used to be!

Familiar! But this time I had some practice, at managing a family! 

Oh, I'll get them together in one place! And once we're together face to face...

I'll show them all the errors of their ways and stop their spread of terror across space!"

Steven sung those last lines while pointing at White Diamond's head ship from the balcony. He then noticed a mirror and saw what he was wearing "Holy crap! What the hell is this!? This ain't my style! Oh god, if Connie sees me in this, she'll never let me hear the end of it!"

"Steven!? Oh my god...HAHAHAHAHA!" he heard the familiar voice of his wife laughing "What are you even wearing!? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" "Damn it" Steven cursed "wait! Connie!? How did you get here!?"

"Through, Pearl's gem. But I'm not all she bought with her" said Connie. Pearl summoned Garnet, Amethyst, and Rebecca out from her gemstone. "Daddy!" said Rebecca running up and hugging him.

"Rebecca! Hey! Oh my gosh! I was so wrapped up with The Diamonds I almost forgot about you!" Steven hugged back "oh, honey, you have no idea what a relief it is to see you after the day I've had!"

"What's with the weird outfit, you look funny!" said Rebecca. Steven looked over and Connie was still trying to hold back her laughter.

"Yeah, you definitely don't have the physique for your mother's old look, perhaps if you were...a lot younger, maybe it would..." said Pearl. "Oh! That reminds me, I got an idea!" said Steven. 

"What?" asked Pearl. "Remember back when I was just a kid, before I gave up on trying to be a Crystal Gem, and I couldn't come on adventures? But you guys would often drop everything just to spend time with me...That's Pink Diamond...they think I'm my Mom, and I'm gonna use that, surely they'd want to celebrate her coming back? So perhaps I could throw some big ball and invite all of Homeworld just like my Mom used to do! 

"Just like in my favourite Princess Movies!?" asked Rebecca. "Just like in your favourite princess movies!" Steven answered, he then leaned into one of the Pebbles "but, could you design me a new outfit, seriously, this is SO not my style! And I want it ready before Connie takes a picture of this!"

Steven then heard a click and a snap from Connie's phone as she continued to giggle "Aaaaaaand, it's too late..." 

Chapter Text

Steven was balancing on a ball, juggling his guitar, a bag of Chaaaaaps! and his old childhood toy, MC Bear Bear, all encased in bubbles, much to the entertainment of a strange pink pearl who resembled White Diamond's Pearl.

He then stopped juggling, leapt off the ball and landed, blowing the pink pearl a kiss as she laughed. Just then, he quickly got back up on the ball and began balancing as pink pearl kept him in place. 

Yellow Diamond peered her head through the door, her neck elongating her head towards Steven and the pink pearl and glared at them for a moment but was ultimately satisfied with what she had seen and left. 

In almost an instant, Steven was in a elegant ballroom, the pink pearl was announcing his arrival, he walked in and waved but suddenly, he tripped over something. 

He heard some snickers coming from the crowd but Yellow Diamond cleared her throat, signalling for them to stop. "Oh, Pink, honestly..." he heard Blue criticize. 

He looked behind himself and saw that beneath his ankle was a foot...the foot of none other than Red Diamond! She immediately put her foot back in place and made an innocent expression, looking the other way. 

Steven was about to pick himself up when he started coughing up hair...pink hair! He looked up and saw White Diamond staring at him with a deranged smile! This prompting him to cough up more hair and spewing out a giant clump of it!

Steven scrambled awake! "Steven, are you okay!?" asked Pearl. "Yeah. I had a real weird nightmare, reminded me of the time I once experimented with LSD" said Steven. "You took LSD!?" said Pearl.

"Oh, yeah, like you weren't aware I had a substance abuse problem when I was a teenager" Steven answered sarcastically "it's not like I took it again...once was enough..." Connie yawned "Morning..." she said. 

"Pink's moving again!" said one of the pebbles. "The new outfit you requested is done, My Diamond" said the other pebble. "Oh! Thanks!" Steven got out go bed and went to the special screen the pebbles built so he could change.

He paused and saw that Rebecca was still asleep, his face lit up when he saw that, he forgot how cute Rebecca was when she's sleeping. He then slipped behind the screen "Goodbye Mom's weird hand me downs!" 

Rebecca yawned herself awake "Good morning everybody" said Rebecca "Whoa! When did all this get here!?" "The Pebbles were at work all night" said Pearl "what do you think?"

"Wow, it looks almost like home!" said Rebecca in wonderment. Steven then stepped out from behind the screen, with a pink outfit that had a hole where Steven's gem was and a cape. 

"Well, what do you think?" asked Steven. Connie was snickering. "What?" Steven asked in an annoyed tone. "Sorry, it's just that...you look like Superman if Superman had come out of the closet" Connie cackled. 

"Well, I think it looks cool" said Steven, pouting. "Isn't it great, Garnet? The Pebbles made this room look just like home!" said Rebecca. "Almost" said Garnet glaring over at the huge head structure of White Diamond. 

"Let's close the curtains" said Steven as he pulled them closed "I'm sick of her glaring at us." "Besides, we've got to propose your idea of a ball to Yellow and Blue" said Pearl. 

"Right! This plan'll have to work, it's got to! So, everyone, I understand we all have a beef with them, but for the sake of the corrupted gems on Earth, we've just gotta suck it up and play nice" said Steven. 

Later that day, Steven was in the main Throne Room of the palace, proposing his plan to Yellow and Blue Diamond. "A ball? We haven't had a ball in six thousand years" said Yellow. 

"We haven't had Pink in six thousand years!" said Blue. "Yeah, that's the spirit, Blue! I mean, think about, Yellow, after six thousand years Pink Diamond makes a miraculous return and it gets treated like no big deal? I mean, come on, surely my return home is something worth celebrating?."

Yellow Diamond began taking what Steven said in consideration. "Besides, a ball this big? White would have to attend! And once all four of us are reunited, we can convince her to come with us to save all those gems on Earth!"

"And this can also mark the beginning of Era 3" Blue added. "You're right! It's brilliant!" Yellow agreed. "Yeah, there you go! Blue, Yellow, thank you both so much!" Steven said with a bow. 

"If White's gonna be there, everything must be perfect!" said Blue "Pink, can you manage this on your own? Our pearls will help you get this all started!" "Not to worry, Everything's gonna be fine!" said Steven.

"At your service, Pink Diamond" said Blue Pearl. "Make sure you go through all our customs with Pink, since she has so much trouble recalling her past here on Homeworld" Yellow instructed the pearls.

"Yes, My Diamond" said Yellow Pearl. "Era 3! Steven, you're already changing the world!" Pearl complimented. "Not quite, this is merely the foundation...we've got a lot to work to do. Alright pearls, let's get to planning!" said Steven.

"We are at your command, Pink Diamond" the pearls said in unison. "Please, just call me Steven" "Whatever you command, Pink Diamond." "Yeah, that's not gonna get old..." Steven grumbled. 

Steven then explained his plan for the ball with the Pearls "So, maybe could set up some balloons and maybe a few confetti cannons..." Steven suggested. "Ooh! Dibs on being the confetti cannon!" said Amethyst.

"Cannons are forbidden inside Palace Walls! And these "balloons" of which you speak? Unprecedented and out of the question" said Yellow Pearl. "Then, what is...?" asked Steven. 

"You are to sit on your elevated throne, while members of your court indicate that they are present" said Yellow Pearl. "So, I just sit here and take attendance?" asked Steven. "Yes, very good, Pink Diamond" 

"Yikes, this sounds pretty dry" said Amethyst. "Liquids are also not allowed within Palace Walls" said Yellow Pearl. "So, booze is out of the question, I'm guessing?" asked Steven. "I don't know what this is, but yes" said Yellow Pearl.

"Great, a boring rigid party that I can't even get hammered at" Steven remarked. "Goodness, Pink Diamond, why ever would you want to be struck by a hammer?" asked Blue Pearl. "Figure of speech" said Steven "I'll explain it to you some other time." 

Steven decides to leap up to Pink Diamond's throne. "From here, you can accept or reject members of your court at your leisure" Yellow Pearl continued "and so will My Diamond, Blue Diamond as well, and if we're lucky, all of us will enjoy the impeccable judgement of White Diamond!"

"So, when she gets here, that's when I can finally speak with her!" said Steven. "Oh stars! No! I forgot how silly you can be. Everyone stays where they belong" said Yellow Pearl. 

"Okay, then I'll just speak to her on the dance floor" said Steven. "Pink Diamond! Your subjects will be dancing for you! Why would a diamond want to dance?" asked Yellow Pearl. 

"Because it's fun?" "What is fuh-un?" "This planet sucks..." Steven grumbled. 

Chapter Text

"Excuse me, Pink Diamond, I asked you a question, what's fuh-un?" asked Yellow Pearl. "Fun is when you enjoy something and want to do it again and again because it makes you happy!" said Rebecca. 

"Rebecca, when did you get here?" asked Steven. "Oh, we got bored and wanted to see how things were going" said Connie "Good job for getting Blue and Yellow to approve of the ball."

"Thanks, but I think I've got my work cut out for me" said Steven. "I don't think we do "fun" here" said Yellow Pearl. "Come on, isn't there anything you like to do?" asked Rebecca.

"Oh, of course not, my feelings are irrelevant" said Yellow Pearl with a chuckle. "No they're not, everyone's feelings matter" said Rebecca. "I like to draw" said Blue Pearl. "Wh-wh-what!?" Yellow Pearl yelped.

"Oooh, Rebecca, good job getting one of them to show some personality!" Steven praised. "Do you have any pictures I can see?" asked Rebecca.

"Um here..." Blue Pearl projected some screens "My Diamond allows me to draw during court proceedings, they're not much." One of the pictures was of Yellow Diamond zapping someone with their power. 

Steven chuckled "Oh gosh, that's totally her! Good job, Blue Diamond's Pearl!" "Oh...thank you" Blue Pearl blushed. "What!? Let me see that! You can't share these! Those pictures are highly confidential!" Yellow Pearl scoffed, grabbing the pictures and scrolled through them.

She then paused on what appeared to be a picture of herself "Hmm, actually, that one's not bad, try it from this angle!" Yellow Pearl posed elegantly. "Oh, so you like to model and she likes to draw, what a combo" said Steven.

"Hey, maybe if you're ever on Earth, I could take you to Paris, you've got the right build to be a supermodel" said Connie. Just then Blue Diamond entered the main throne room and Yellow and Blue Pearl immediately stood at attention. 

"Pink! Why aren't you getting ready?" asked Blue Diamond. "Oh! Right, I need to get on my throne!" said Steven. "Are you really gonna look like this!? Even at the ball!?" Blue questioned. 

"Well pardon my anatomy" Steven responded. "You weren't thinking on inviting your Earth friends, are you?" asked Blue. "To the biggest event on Homeworld? Uh, yeah!" Steven answered. 

Blue Diamond placed her hands between Steven and The Crystal Gems & his family and separated him from them. "Steven!" Connie and the gems called out "Daddy!" Rebecca cried out.

"Blue, what the hell!?" Steven questioned. "Pink, quit fooling around! White Diamond is gonna be there!" Blue chided "We have to present her with our best selves! Just as our gems present us with their best selves! This ball is  meant to inspire everyone!" 

"Well, I think my friends are very inspiring, they've sure inspired me on many occasions" said Steven "and I'm sure they can inspire White too...probably..." 

Blue Diamond rolled her eyes "Very well, you may bring along your pearl, of course. Along with your pet and hybrid experiment." "That's my wife and daughter you're talking about" Steven said, glaring at her. 

"As for this faulty Amethyst..." "Here we go..." Amethyst grumbled "...She'll require limb enhancers to meet the height requirements of a proper Amethyst. The Sapphire will enter with the other sapphires of course and the ruby will need to enter with the other guards."

"You mean Garnet?" asked Steven. "Garnet? Does "that" call herself a garnet?" Blue scoffed in the tone of a high school mean girl "Ha ha! Oh how silly you are, Pink! Where are we supposed to put her in with? The Demantoids?  The hessonites? The pyropes? Pink, I'm being very generous but you can't just expect me to-"

"No, it's fine, I'll split up..." Garnet said in a subtly angry tone. "Well, at least the sapphire in there is making sense" said Blue. Garnet snarled. "Actually, I think that may have been Ruby's idea." said Steven.

"Pink, aren't you going to ring in the ball?" asked Blue. "Huh?" "Fine! I'll take care of it! Come, Pearl" said Blue in the tone of an exhausted mother as Yellow and Blue Pearl run after her.

"You really okay with this, Garnet?" asked Steven. "Please, Garnet, I want you there" said Rebecca. "Don't worry, I'll be back when this is all over, this is your father's one chance to speak to White Diamond, I cannot ruin it for him, we've got a lot of gems depending on us back at home."

"Okay..." said Rebecca reluctantly. Rebecca was actually more aware of the situation than she seemed. She understood why Garnet had to do what she did, she knew she was right, so Rebecca had ultimately decided to be on her best behaviour.

At long last, The Ball had begun. At the top of the ballroom, a disco ball like gem was singing a haunting song as all the guests began to enter. "That singer's singing is more haunting than festive" said Steven.

Steven had Connie and Rebecca side by side as Pearl stood below his throne. A pair of gems approached his throne "Pink Diamond, it's wonderful to be in your presence" they greeted in unison.

"Oh, thank you" said Steven, nervously. "So radiant and sparkly!" The pair of gems exited as another appeared behind them "Pink Diamond!" "That's the name, don't wear it out!" "So radiant and exquisite!" 

"Steven! You're doing great! White Diamond will be impressed!" said Pearl. "She'd better be" said Steven. "Yo! My Diamond!" said Amethyst coming in with limb enhancers.

"Ah, Amethyst, those limb enhancers look good on you!" said Steven. "Thanks, I'm getting the hang of them, I don't know how Peridot moved in these, oh! Look at this new party trick!"

Amethyst touched her nose with one of the fingers, it then made its way to Steven. "Amethyst, I don't think this is the right time or place" Steven whispered. "Oh! Right! Gotcha! I'm gonna mingle with the other quartzes" said Amethyst.

"I hope this works out, Connie" said Steven. "I know what you mean" said Connie "this ball's meant to inspire, but I have this feeling of dread..." "Oh! There's Ruby and Sapphire!" said Rebecca.

 "It means a lot that they're going to this length for me, but it breaks my heart to see them be forced apart by this rigid society" said Steven. "I know, especially since they're married" said Connie.

Just then, Yellow Pearl made her appearance "Everyone, behold! The daunting beauty and elegance that is...Yellow Diamond!" Behind huge curtains Yellow Diamond stood making her entrance into the ballroom.

She took her throne which was situated to the right of Steven "Not a bad turnout, Pink" "I appreciate your attendance, Yellow" Steven answered politely. Blue Pearl then made her entrance.

"Ahem, everyone prepare yourselves for the emotionally overpowering elegance that is, Blue Diamond" The curtains pulled back again as Blue gracefully entered the room. "Emotionally overpowering is right" Steven whispered to Connie. 

"You're doing great!" Blue whispered as she took her seat. "Thank you, Blue" said Steven. And then, the moment Steven had been waiting for, White Pearl floated on in.

"To those in attendance at the Era 3 Ball, White Diamond..." Steven leaned forward expectingly "...has more important things to attend to!" "Excuse me!?" said Steven. White Pearl encased herself in a bubble and sunk into the floor then appeared on White's throne.

"I will be overseeing in her stead! Welcome to Era 3!" White Pearl announced. Every gem in attendance began to to dance in a mechanical manner as White Pearl observed with a deranged smile. 

Rebecca had begun to yawn. "Getting tired, Rebecca?" asked Steven. "Yeah..." said Rebecca. "Alright. Hey, Pearl, Rebecca's tired, could you send her back to my room and put her to bed?" asked Steven. 

"Of course, My Diamond, I think it's around her usual bedtime anyway" said Pearl "come Rebecca." "Pearl, I'm too tired to walk all the way there, would you carry me?" asked Rebecca. "Yes, I will do that" said Pearl "I'll be right back, my Diamond." 

Pearl carried Rebecca off to Pink Diamond's room. Steven and Connie continued watching the ball "Well this is a dud. I was counting on White being there, we all did as we were supposed to for nothing!"

"Steven..." asked Connie. "Don't you mean, Pink Diamond?" said Steven. "No, I meant Steven, you could just say what you need to say to her pearl and she could relay the message for you" said Connie.

"Nah...you know what? Screw it. If White's not here, I'm not gonna care about some stinking rule, Connie, let's dance!" said Steven. "Steven...I'm not sure if that's a good idea" said Connie.

"What, it's not like we're gonna do anything while, I just wanna show these robots what a real dance is!" said Steven. Pearl came back and took back her place during this conversation. "Okay...if you say so" said Connie.

Steven leapt down onto the dance floor as the gems gazed in awe "Let's show them the true elegance of dance" said Steven. Steven and Connie held hands danced liked they did at their wedding.

They both got so caught up in it that...they melded together into Stevonnie much to the silence of everyone. White Pearl's smile turned into a frown. "Pink! What are you doing!" said Yellow gritting her teeth as she stood up.

"What? I'm just dancing..." Stevonnie suddenly saw her reflection on the dance floor "...oh shit." "Pink, this is completely unacceptable! Unfuse or I'll make you!" said Blue. "Okay! Okay! Sorry!" Stevonnie apologized "I'll-" 

Ruby and Sapphire interrupted by fusing back into Garnet "If you want her, you'll have to get through me!" "No, Garnet! Stand down! I'll-" Stevonnie was about to say before Amethyst and Pearl fused into Opal. 

"And me!" said Opal. "Hey! Come on, you're making it worse!" said Stevonnie "Blue, Yellow, it was an accident! I'll unfuse at-" "And me!" said a sudden fusion of two jades. "Anyone else gonna make this worse?" Stevonnie facepalmed. 

"I knew I wasn't the only one who-AAAAAAAAUGH!" The Jade fusion was destabilized by Yellow Diamond's electricity. Yellow Diamond then, in quick succession zapped Opal and Garnet too, reverting them back to their gemstones. 

"Opal! Garnet! Yellow, look, this was an accident, I'll unfuse right now, okay! Surely there's a reasonable-!" But Yellow quickly snatched them. "Pink! You've gone too far, even for you!" said Yellow. 

"aaaaand we're not gonna be reasonable..." Stevonnie yelped. They were then tossed into a dark room in a tall tower "And you're gonna stay in there and think about what you've done!"

"No, wait!" Stevonnie cried out in vain as the door slammed shut.