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"What about this one?" Bradley asked, masking the growing irritation in his tone. He gripped the sides of his phone and lowered it so Jake could see it from his spot on the bottom bunk.
The blond looked up from his phone and braced himself for what he'd see. It was a nice photo of him and Bradley walking along the beach, their hands clasped together was the only thing visible. His heart started to race, he could clearly see the design of his watch—they'd know it was him.
"Maybe somethin' more discreet, Roos?" He suggested cautiously. The older man audibly sighed and Jake could feel the annoyance from above.
"How can we be more discreet?" He gruffed, hurriedly sitting up.
The 'soft launch' was Rooster's idea after a year of loving the other pilot in silence. The silence was Hangman's idea. It wasn't that he was embarrassed of who he was or who he was with, it was the fear of what would come after it.
"Just find something else."
"Find something else," Bradley repeated bitterly under his breath, letting his phone fall on top of his chest. He'd lost track of how long this was taking, choosing one single photo to share with their friends once they got back to shore. He wondered what Jake's problem was anyway, most of them knew about their relationship.
Bradley loved Jake and just wanted to be able to share his love with everyone. He picked his phone back up, swiping a few times before the screen landed on his favorite photo. A screenshot from a video he took while on vacation to the Seresin Ranch, Jake came up behind him and wrapped his arm around his waist, and lovingly kissed him while Bradley looked like he had never been happier.
"I'm going to find food," Jake announced, standing up and tugging on his fleece jacket. Bradley wanted to roll his eyes and mutter a dismissive response, but he wasn't like that.
Swinging his legs over the edge, he jumped down off the bed with a thud, shoving his phone in his back pocket. "We agreed to this, Jake," he reminded his boyfriend sternly.
"Yeah, I know. Maybe we could hold off, wait till we're back on shore." All Bradley could do was roll his eyes at the nonchalance. On shore would turn into a week, then two, then a month. He was tired of keeping them a secret.
"Why are you so against this? It's been a year!" Bradley raised his voice.
Jake turned to face him, zipping up his jacket. "I'm not," he said plainly.
"It's just a fucking picture, Jake."
Just a picture. Jake swallowed and shifted his gaze to look at the metal floor holding them up. That picture would lead to comments and texts of congratulations and then they would lead to Bradley realizing Jake wasn't the one and would leave him. He would have to deal with the looks of pity, not feeling worthy of a celebrated love.
"I want the world to know how much I love you. I want them to know you're mine!" Jake didn't blame him for the passionate yelling.
He didn't mind being a secret if it meant keeping Bradley. He was used to being a secret, it felt comfortable. The one time he let someone share their secret left him scarred.
"You'll leave," Jake whispered moments later.
There was another long and grueling silence. Bradley's eyes opened wide he swore they were going to pop out of his head and his cheeks were red with frustration. "What the hell does that mean?" Bradley huffed, putting his hands on his hips.
Jake's fingers twitched at his side and he longed for a way out. The door was right there, calling his name but Bradley repeating his question was louder.
He stepped closer to the other man, tilting his chin slightly to meet his stare, "You'll realize that this was better as a secret. I'm better as a secret."
Bradley's cheeks grew a deeper shade of scarlet. His eyebrows were so low, he was surprised he could still keep Jake in focus.
His name was Jack, a fellow pilot he met while at Top Gun. Jake felt like a fool, believing he was worthy of someone who thought of him beyond the combines of his house. He dumped him 2 days after posting a picture of the two of them while at dinner. "This was a bad idea. Sorry" Jake had never felt so low. He was left with the fallout and the "Oh bless his heart" comments.
Rooster's calls echoed in his ears, bringing him back to reality. "I don't want to keep secrets just to keep you, Jake!" He shouted, taking a few steps back. "I've been in love with you for as long as I've known you. Everybody knows how much I love you."
"Bradley—" he choked out.
"Why would I leave when I just got you? I've made so many plans," Bradley’s voice calmed, calmed enough to step forward and cup Jake's cheek. His face finally softened once he saw the sadness displayed across Jake's features. Jake's skin was cold as he swiped along his cheek, catching the tear that had unknowingly slipped, "But I'd give you anything you wanted."
And with that, Bradley let him go and retreated back to the trenches. Jake stood there a moment, frozen and trying to process Bradley's reassurance. He was loved, he was loved, and he'd continue to be loved.
Bradley woke up the next morning with a grim reminder of last night with a terrible headache. "Fuck," he groaned, sleepily searching for his phone. After finding it under his pillow, he tapped the screen and squinted at the sudden brightness. His notifications were standard…except one from Instagram.
jake.seresin tagged you in a post
His heart skipped a beat and his chest fluttered as he opened it. It was his favorite photo of the two of them. No caption, no location, and the comments turned off—just a tag on the center. @bradbradshaw. He checked the timestamp, determining that he posted it in the middle of the night.
He flung the top half of his frame over the edge, seeing Jake sleeping peacefully below him. Expertly, he climbed down and straddled the man. "Jesus!" Jake yelped, startled awake by the sudden weight. "Bradshaw, what the fuck?" He blinked the sleep away and settled his hand on Bradley’s hips.
All Bradley could do was smile down at him, allowing himself to be in sheer bliss. "I saw what you did," he said, pushing some of Jake's bedhead back into place. "I love you."
Jake took his finger and curled it around Bradley's dog tags, pulling him down for a good morning kiss, "I love you too, Bradshaw."