Chapter Text
“Man, what a beautiful day to be alive! Come on, Aubrey, don’t you want to get your blood flowing?!” cheers Kel, jogging far ahead of Aubrey, haphazardly walking backwards to face her. The crisp summer breeze showers a downpour of hot ass Vitamin D on the skins of the two teenagers. If you could focus enough, you could hear the squawking of bir-
“Can you PLEASE slow down, doofus?!” yells Aubrey, barely keeping it together from the brash heat and Kel’s somewhat annoying optimism. She’s been hoping to get into shape to show off to the Hooligans, since Angel has surprisingly started growing more adept. Aubrey admits it: she’s proud of how far the little man has come, but she isn’t backing down from her pedestal anytime soon.
… and that brings her to putting up with this slump of a friend. KEL. “Come on, Aubrey! We can take a pit stop at my house! We can get water, food, HERO’S FOOD, to be specific!” Kel already salivates from the mere thought of his big brother’s cooking, wiping it off quickly whilst still jogging backwards.
Aubrey, disgusted by her childhood friend, yells to make up for the distance between the two. “HEY! WATCH WHERE YOU’RE GOING!” Kel promptly turns forward, staring at the ground. Noticing he almost stepped over a white lily, Kel drags his foot away from the delicate flower. “Man, Aubs! Thanks for the warning! I almost stepped on this poor flower! Imagine how HEARTBROKEN Basil would be!” Kel does a fake swoon, almost falling over from it. Despite the dopey expression he was making, tuning out any and all thoughts, he still heard Aubrey’s face palm from a block away.
“I’m talking about the street… and that robot, thing.” Aubrey points at the street, with a strange robot with an odd hood blasting flame at the local garbage. Kel almost walked directly into the flames. “Oh! Hello Mr. Streetcleaner! Hey Aubs! It’s these new edition of (INSERT ROBOT COMPANY) I’ve been hearing so much about!” Kel lets out a large grin and extends his hand as greetings. “How do you do?” The robot continues roasting the garbage into ash, unaware (or ignorant) of Kel’s hello. Kel stares at the Streetcleaner a little longer, right before a lightbulb appears atop his head. Kel, you genius, you!
“Oh! Beep beep beep bop? Brrrrrrr- breep beep?”
Suddenly, the Streetcleaner turns around, placing a pause to his work. Aubrey catches up to the two at a mild pace, sweating from the heat of both the sun and the roasting garbage nearby. A few other townspeople wander by, despite how early in the morning it was.
After a small staring match with Kel, the Streetcleaner lets out a beep in return, then a strange text-to-speech-like voice sputters from the hunk of metal. Shaking its flamethrower and reloading the fuel gauge with experience, it lets out an aggressive “What did you just say about my mother?”
Crap. Aubrey grabs Kel by the collar of his shirt and absconds the hell outta there.
…
After successfully escaping a rightfully pissed off robot with a flamethrower and accidentally pushing a few fellow civilians out of the way, Kel and Aubrey let out raspy wheezes (mostly Kel) right outside the Rodriguez household. After a minute, both sides look towards each other. A brief pause. Then laughter.
Lots of it.
Kel wheezes like a tea kettle left screeching for a day. Aubrey howls with laughter as she clutches her chest, and even, miraculously, slaps her knees. Despite the sun beating down on the two, they couldn’t believe the situation they got into. “OH MY GOD, KEL! I DIDN’T THINK THEY COULD EVEN TALK! HOW DID YOU EVEN PISS OFF AN A.I.?!” Aubrey raises out a hand as Kel returns with a high-five, leaving a clap that reverberates throughout the neighborhood. The wind breezes past whilst Mincy doodles a quick sketch of a deactivated Droid in the background.
Kel lets out one last gasp for air prior to resonding. “No idea, but that was fun as heck. We should try that again sometime!” Aubrey still leaves a smile, left with some sternness behind it. “No. Absolutely not.”
The doghouse right outside Kel’s house lies a sleeping Hector, still asleep despite the volume of the two teenagers nearby. Kel waves Aubrey over and knocks on the door “Anyways, that was something new to my mourning routine. Wanna chill out and bother Hero for a bit? He’s still on his break with us for today.”
Aubrey averts her eyes, a tad bit guilty. “Are you sure? I didn’t even ask beforehand, or anything. Would your parents mind?”
In response, Kel lets out a chuckle. “It’s no problem, Aubs. (Aubrey jabs Kel, “Don’t call me that.”) Ow! But seriously, you can chill here anytime. I’m sure my parents won’t mind.” Kel scratches the back of his head. “Sally has started taking a liking to you, anyways.”
Right as Aubrey opened her mouth to speak, her phone rings inside her pocket: a small jingle from Captain Spaceboy’s newest mixtape, made for that Sweetheart crossover. Yuck. “Hm? Oh, alright.” As quick as it came, she clicks off her phone, then promptly flicks Kel’s forehead. “Alright Mr. Doormat, despite your convincing spiel, Basil’s mom sequel called me over.”
“Wait, Polly?”
“Yeah, duh. She needs help managing a few things over there. After all the… bullying I threw at Basil for the past few years, she got pissed off. I’m basically doing volunteer work st this rate.”
Kel lightly chuckles before throwing finger guns at Aubrey. “Serves you right!”
Aubrey’s smile contorts instantly to a scowl. “Hmph. Rude. I’m working on it.”
Kel then waves both his hands at Aubrey. “I’m messing! Anyways, you better get going before she ends you. I’ve only seen her angry once and that’s when I accidentally shaved Basil bald…”
Whilst walking away, Aubrey lets out a howl of laughter once more. “I still have no idea why anyone thought it was a good idea to give you a razor. (And with one last wave backwards, Aubrey exclaims) Catch you later, nerd.”
Once Aubrey was out of sight, Kel lets out a heavy sigh. It’s been a long time since Sunny’s moved away. A few weeks, but the thought still counts.
Kel stares at the empty house nearby... and the Drone nonchalantly flying around it. Apparently the old buyers got scared off because they thought the house was haunted! They complained about the constant piano plucks that supposedly happened occasionally. Heh, maybe Mari didn’t want anyone to touch their memories. God, he still misses her.
Great. All this introspection’s bumming Kel out. It’s been four years now, but the things that were said at that hospital still ring through his mind. He sifts through his hair before sighing again. He’ll end up like Hero at this rate.
…
The sun’s still bright today, but Kel definitely needs to brew himself a new coffee. Hector continues to rest within the doghouse, unaware of his owner leaning on it right outside. Taking a second to FOCUS, something he learned from Sunny, he notices the little insects and creatures that prowl amongst the overgrown grass.
And right as he took the step towards home, a strange hum murmurs through the window. Unsure if he’s hearing things, Kel sticks a finger through his ears, cleaning out a disgusting amount of wax. Gross… but the noise was still there. Carefully, he peers through his window, noticing a bright purple sheen radiating through it. The hum grows louder and louder. Kel checks the doorknob, noticing that it was left open. The moment he turned it…
With a shuttering boom, the house exploded, leaving a shower of wood and splinters flying through the air. The instant impact left Kel flying through the air, already leaving bleeding wounds and cuts from the debris. Everything was strewn about, all his memories in his home, crushed out of nowhere. His ears were ringing as everything felt disoriented. What… was that?!
Barely mustering his strength, he picks himself back up. He hisses from the sharp pangs of pain from his arms, while his legs felt completely numb and crushed under the rubble. The last thing he saw was a shadowy figure, standing over him.
A sprout mole.
It was blurry, but he was absolutely sure of it.
Only one thing coursed over his brain. “I finally lost my marbles.”
Kel blacks out.
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Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.
Kel wakes up to the blinding white of a hospital room. The constant beeping of the heart monitor reassures him that he’s still alive. He mumbles something prior to rubbing his eyes, only to notice how strange his arms felt. It was metal… and orange. Hero sits on a chair nearby, left in awe.
First, shock. Then, pride.
“IT WORKED! KEL! YOU’RE FINALLY BACK!”
Hero shakes Kel with wide eyes. This was the most excitement he has ever seen his older brother in years, and Kel couldn’t help but smile himself. “What worked? What’d I miss out on?”
Hero takes a deep breath and steadies himself. “Well, Kel… first and foremost: what’s the last thing you remember?”
“Ummm… walking with Aubrey, then… uhhh.. the house…”
Kel’s eyes widen, then his heart beats out of his chest. However, instead, he just hears rattles and clinks. “The HOUSE EXPLODED.”
Hero’s face morphs into a somber expression. He plays with a pen while adjusting a clipboard over his legs. “Unfortunately, yes… but anything else?”
Kel clicks his tongue. “Uhmm… a… sprout mole?” He then catches onto how weird he sounds. “Likewaitmaybeitwassomesortofpost-explosionhysteriay’know-“
Hero then nods his head… what? “Correct! We were uh… operating a new experiment with Dad.”
Kel tilts his head, confused. “An.. experiment? And why Dad of all people?!”
Hero clicks his pen multiple times. “Well, Dad’s a bit of a handyman, but I’m sure you noticed how they started creating new robot prototypes?”
Kel glances at his arm, flexing his mechanical muscles. Sick. “Yeah! So… what about that, bro?”
Hero then pauses.
The awkward silence fills the air. Kel waits patiently for what’s next. Hero lets out one of his patented sighs. “You were supposed to be dead.”
Kel’s face turns pale. “…you were trying to KILL ME?! No way.”
Hero’s somehow reaches a new, deeper sigh, filled with disappointment. “No, Kel, why would we EVER want that?! It was something else entirely!”
Kel deadpans. “You’re giving me mixed signals, Herebro.”
Hero then stares at the hospital bed while the monitor continues beeping, lost in thought. Then he just puts on a wry smile. “Do you want the long version or short version?”
Kel’s eyebrow raises, pulling off his best impression of The Rock. “You know me! Short version!”
“You are now a ‘cyborg’ and you must feed off of blood in order to survive.”
Kel is lost in awe. “WOAH… CYBORG?!? That’s AWESOME!!!”
Hero then pokes Kel in the forehead. “I gotta admit, it IS kinda ‘cool’, but we had to replace your heart with an artificial one. It can no longer pump blood, but needs to intake blood to keep yourself alive.”
Kel stares at the comically large Blood packet connected to his chest. “…can I still drink Orange Joe?”
Hero lets out another weak smile at his brother’s strange perception. Only he would react like that in this situation. “Also, I forgot to mention! Sunny’s mind creatures got released in the explosion and now they are rampaging the world.”
Kel’s eyes widen. “Woah… but you still haven’t answered my question! Orange Joe or norange joe?” He then mutters to himself briefly, “i swear if i cant drink it this ain’t a life worth living, man”
Hero snaps in front of his brother’s face.
“Sunny’s headspace creatures are killing people. They are committing massacres out there as we speak and you may be the only person capable of taking them out before we are all doomed. I know it’s a heavy task, Kel, but we need to undo the mistakes our dad made.”
Kel then sips some blood from the pouch. Tastes… pretty good! “Okay, but then how is this hospital still operating and functioning?”
Hero walks towards the window, curling his finger and gesturing him to follow. Kel glances outside.
Oh God.
The hospital’s bottom has large barricades and bunches of barbed wire, with armies of knightly Sprout Moles, fish with legs, and … squizzards(?!) all attempt to break through. Police and other civilians he couldn’t decipher all unload whatever weaponry they have onto the encroaching horde.
Hero sighs again. “We can barely keep up our own front. Sprout moles have already started leaking into Australia, and do you even KNOW how far away that is?!”
Kel then nods. “I still don’t see the issue here, maybe they just want hugs.”
Hero then points at the man being bitten at by an orb-like rotund bunny.
Kel shrugs, slurping up more of the heart juice. “Wow, that might leave a mark.”
Hero then points at the floors of corpses on the ground level once more.
Kel waves it off. “Yeah, honestly, I don’t know how you could die to SPROUT MOLES of all things.”
Hero’s body slumps, face exasperated. “You can still drink Orange Joe-“ Kel’s face lights up- “-but the Orange Joe factories are located in Australia.”
Kel’s head creaks and turns towards Hero.
“What.”
Hero then twirls his finger. “And if these armies reach the Orange Joe factories, they will surely close down for good…”
And so began Kel’s purification.
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[ULTRAKEL]
PRELUDE - INTO THE KEL
TIME: 3 MONTHS (D)
KILLS: 0 (D)
STYLE: 0 (D)
D RANK
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