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On a Runaway Homophobic Train, For Love

Summary:

No matter how homophobic a train is, Shelly's love for his husband is stronger.

This is what happens when you write a fic in frantic fanfic with a one minute timer while hiding the previous parts.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

3.5 Shelly de Killer was on a quest to reunite with his love, Colonel Sanders. There was only two problems: a battle field and the Homophobic Train.
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Homophobic Train smirked. And told Shelly the Killer he must place higher than him in a game of Fortnite in order to cross the battle field and get closer to his love mr. Sanders.
Shelly was really good at fortnight because he was really good at shooting people and the homophobic train fucking cried really loudly and homophobicly.
Shelly then set off across the land
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to reunite with his lover. Colonel Sanders is looking out of the window, waiting for Shelly while watching the chickens they will slaughter for the next batch of KFC chickens. Then the tram
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rammed into their house and killed all of their chicken. Colonel Sanders got very upset, he had planned this romantic dinner all year.
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Now it was ruined thanks to this stupid train. The train had clearly been targeting them because they were gay and Shelly (thicc) wasn't going to stand for it. He stood up. As Shelly walked towards the homophobic train that was halfway in their house the sound of his ass cheeks clapping reverberated for miles. The train was really in for it now. He had upset Colonel Sanders and ruined their romantic night together. Shelly was pissed. Ultra pissed.
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"You fucking train ruined everything! I was just trying to have a cozy evening with Colonel Sanders and it was everythign but cozy! I do not want to deal with your ass either!" Shelly (thicc) screamed at the homophobic train.
"With my ass, you say? Tough talk coming from a fella with a fat truck," the train then replied. "Gay f
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fruity people do not deserve a nice, cozy evening."
With that the homophobic train started huffing and puffing and it put all its effort to flatten Shelly's thicc ass.
"There can be only one Fat Ass in this town."
Shelly ignored the trains taunt and jumped over it, landing behind the train. He thretened the trains engine.
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The train panicked, but it could not turn around on account of it being on rails. It could also not reverse, because its inertia was too high. Shelly De Killer started clapping his thicc cheeks inside the engineer compartment, and began to put out the firebox.
"No!!" screamed the homophobic Locomotive, as Shelly slowly smothered its fire with copious amounts of cake.
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The engine began to sputter and wheeze.
"Shelly de Killer... you will not defeat mE! The HOMOPHOBIC TRAIN IS TOO POWERFUL!!"
Shelly ignored the pained cries of the train and continued smothering it with his thicc, thicc cake. Finally, the engine was completely broken down. Another assassination successfully completed.
The train came to a screeching halt, and all the passengers on board looked bewildered, stepping out of their cars.
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Finally, Shelly had arrived. His beloved was only a short distance away.
Quickly he ran into a sprint and threw himself at Colonel Sanders who had been waiting so patiently for him.
"I have returned, my love. I am so sorry for keeping you waiting."
Colonel Sanders glanced at the remains of the Homophobic Train before turning back to Shelly with a fond smile on his face.
"It seems we have a lot to catch up on and you certainly have an interesting story to tell."
And so they began to walk away together, Shelly recounting everything that had happened. Never again would they have to feat the Homophobic Train.

Notes:

Shelly de Killer/Colonel Sanders is probably our favourite crack ship at this point ngl. Anyway, if you want to join in with us then feel free to join our Discord server, the link is in the series notes