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It was going to be one of those nights again.
A night where ghosts from the past haunted her to her core.
One that wouldn’t allow her to rest in her bed with her partner.
One that had her staring at a cup on the counter trying her best to keep dinner down. Her eyes burning as she stared the piece of porcelain down. Whether the burning came from the tears that threatened to spill or the thought that she could destroy the offending piece of drinkware just from her eyes alone.
But she couldn’t.
Just like she couldn’t have saved Ruby back in the Ever After…
The shock of watching Ruby…
She couldn’t even finish the thought.
And settled on staring the cup down.
Her tears started to blur her vision and her head began to spin. Her left eye already has been slightly blurred for as long as she has been fighting, so for both eyes to have that fogginess gives her more stress than necessary.
The cup wasn’t even a teacup. It was one of the mugs that she would use for her coffee. She made sure that it resembled nothing of a teacup. But thanks to waking up in the night, a desert as dry as Vacuo on her tongue, she came down for some water to drink. But her tired mind kept playing tricks on her after the horrible nightmare she just woke from and made the mug look like that teacup that once took her partner away.
She almost crumbled on the spot, thinking she was still in bed, still suffering from a nightmare. But she wasn’t, otherwise Ruby would have already awoken her. She would already be soothing the tears on Weiss’ face, the same way Weiss would with her after Ruby would begin to thrash from her own nightmares.
But she was still in the kitchen, locked in a staredown with a piece of drinkware.
She knows that Yang, Blake and Ruby struggle with the same problem. It haunted Juane too, but more in the way of his quick acceptance of what had happened. None of them could ever look at a teacup that was that round with such a nice handle without feeling like they were still stuck in that twisted fairytale.
And when they had found Ruby after watching her leave in complete despair, the feeling didn’t fade. Ruby had been…different. For a good while. It tore Weiss apart. Yang as well. Blake had done her best to stay strong for her, for both of them really, but they all knew that Blake was just as shattered as them.
And the war was still happening at the time. And they still had to get back to Remnant to continue their fight. But all of them had changed. All from one teacup.
As tears flowed down her face freely, cutting deeper than the scar that has always graced her face, she could feel the panic attack completely take over. She was terrified, stuck back in the Ever After watching as the ground swallowed up her beloved partner. The partner she had failed . That she let feel worthless and like a failure. That she didn’t make time for despite her promise to be the best partner. Weiss made her feel unwanted when Ruby was the person she wanted by her side the most. Who suffered silently and alone but still took the time to comfort Weiss as the bizarre burned while they fled.
She lunged for the mug, gripping it tight. Glaring at it while she choked back sobs. She threw open the window above the sink and launched the mug out, subconsciously using some glyphs to get it away from their home faster.
Her breath didn’t slow though and the whole room still spun, her eyes shedding what must have been an infinite amount of tears. She just wanted to go back to bed with the person she loved most. But she was drowning in the past.
Friends, allies, enemies, many of them had died during the war. So much pain. So much anger. So much loneliness. But none of it was like the moment that Ruby brought that damn cup up to her lips.
Nothing made her world crumble like that even though she had watched her homeland crumble just days before. Watching her team fall over the edge into what she believed to be death and still forced to fight to save as many as she could only added salt to the wound. And then finding them all again had felt like the Gods had finally offered her a little mercy. But it was more like a palate cleanser giving her little respite from the next taste of pain. Because losing Ruby again, even if it wasn’t permanent again , was pain that Weiss had never anticipated. The only difference was that Ruby was making the active choice to leave it all, that it wasn’t the threat that they had all signed up for that they knew that could cost their lives. The fact that Ruby felt she needed to be gone, that she needed to kill herself…
It was her worst nightmare come true.
And she was forced to relive it most nights during the war.
Because even though Ruby Rose came back, she wasn’t who they knew. She was someone that became what some would assume the perfect leader. But she wasn’t. Not for team RWBY. Team RWBY needed Ruby Rose and what they got was the perfect fairytale leader. And following her was like chasing a ghost.
But eventually Ruby, the Ruby that she, Yang and Blake knew, returned to them, with words about the heart always remembering. And she still wasn't exactly the same but she was still back. And none of them ever wanted to let her go. And they didn’t.
They made sure of it.
They couldn’t lose her. Not again. Not when team RWBY was the final home they had left. And they would protect it with all they had.
Weiss was finally able to stumble into one of their kitchen chairs. Her knuckles paper white as they clenched hard enough to start hearing small cracks in the wood. She needed to ground herself. She needed to remember where she was.
The war was over and they had won. They were safe. They were happy, or as happy as they could be after all the horrors they had to endure to save the world.
But she still spiraled, because even after all that, they could still lose Ruby. She could still lose Ruby.
“Ruby…” she weakly whimpered out.
All she could see was the despondent eyes staring the whole team down from behind a tilted up cup. All that she could hear over the roaring sound of her blood in her ears was the sickening sound of the ground opening up, taking away her partner. Her Ruby.
Her too young leader that carried the weight of the world on her too young shoulders. Her Ruby, whose loneliness rivaled, or more accurately bested, her own.
Her–
“Weiss,” a rushed whisper came from the doorframe of the kitchen. She saw more than heard the rush of a red blur, rose petals littering the tile she had mopped earlier that day.
Steady and calloused hands rested on her shoulders as piercing silver stared at her in concern.
The one person that calmed her was here. Her partner. Her Ruby Rose.
“Ruby.” The pounding in her chest was starting to die down and her breathing slowed. Roses filled her nose and her hand loosened just enough for a pair of hands the worm into them.
“I’m here, Weiss. Come back to me.”
She could hear her, smell her, feel her. But she still couldn’t see her. Not fully. Not her face, nor her eyes. Only the empty ones that tried to hide behind a too large teacup.
“Please don’t leave me. Leave us. We never meant to make you feel–”
“I know. I know. I won’t leave again. I’m here.” Shining silver stared at her again, breaking the views of oh so stormy gray.
“What’s happening here?” Blake sleepily asked as she entered, her voice just as quiet as the others. “I thought I heard something over Yang’s snoring and saw the light turned on.”
Weiss only focused on Ruby, all her attention on slowly coming back from Ever After.
“Teacup,” Ruby muttered gravely. Weiss was sure she threw the cup out already but Ruby was smart. She probably saw the open cupboard that held all their dishware and drinkware alike and one of Weiss’s favorite mugs missing and knew that it wasn't a coincidence that the kitchen window was wide open.
“Let me go get Yang.” Blake said, rushing off in a hurry.
Great. You woke everyone up. Weiss thought. But she knew that if it had been one of them, she would be down in a hurry. ‘Teacup’ was probably all their least favorite word so whenever it was uttered it meant being there for each other. As the team they are.
It was a shame that word was tainted for them. It never stopped them from drinking tea, but not from any classic teacup. Never from a teacup.
“Are you coming back to me?”
She was blinking hard, trying to keep the image of her falling partner out of her mind, so she only nodded and squeezed the strong, steady hands holding hers.
“Good. That’s really good, Weiss. Blake and Yang will be here soon.” Her whispered voice always helped to calm Weiss down from a nightmare and the promise of her other two best friends was grounding.
And on queue was a pair of quick footsteps making their way down the stairs.
“We’re here Weiss,” Yang’s steady voice soothed. “All of us. All of team RWBY is here.”
And it helped to reassure her, make her sure of the present.
“Are we allowed to touch you?” Blake’s voice carefully asked, but Weiss could hear the urgency of her faunus friend wanting to offer physical comfort.
And the promise of a hug from her three most favorite people made her look into the silver, lilac and amber eyes of her team and utter a strangled yes.
Quickly she was wrapped from all sides. Blake on her left side and Yang on her right. And her lovable dolt completely crashed into her from the front. It was warm. It was safe.
It was home.
And they will repeat this again when it inevitably happens. When the thought of losing Ruby to her own solitude nearly killed all of them. When they all believed they failed each other. When they still feel like they did and still do.
“I’m sorry,” she muttered, tears still flowing. “I should have been there for you Ruby. I should have taken the time.”
“It’s ok Weiss. You couldn’t have known how much I was suffering,” Ruby replied.
“But I should have. I’m your partner and I failed you. I didn’t help you when you needed me most. I added to it.”
“Hey, no, none of that. You couldn’t have known, I didn’t–”
“Don’t you dare finish that thought, Ruby Rose. The weight of the world was on your shoulders and I did nothing to alleviate it.” Weiss will be damned if she let Ruby try to take the blame herself.
Blake and Yang tightened their holds on her. It helped to stop her shaking that she didn’t notice she was doing. And she knew it was to remind her that it wasn’t just her. That they all said words intended as kindness and motivation but became poison in their leaders ears. It still did nothing to her guilt in not noticing, in not comforting when she knew how it felt to be isolated.
“I let you feel alone. ” Weiss’ eyes squeezed shut as the words came out choked.
“But I’m not now.” Ruby leaned her head forward, both of their foreheads now pressing gently against one another.
Weiss could also feel the breath radiating off Ruby’s lips, close enough for her to press hers against. Normally she would blush and shyly close that gap, but she didn’t. Part of her not giving into her desires was because it didn’t feel right to find comfort in that way while she still felt so anxious. And the other part was that Yang and Blake were there and while they wouldn’t hold it over her during such a fragile moment, the teasing they would eventually do would be unbearable.
The corner of her lips quirked up at the thought. It told her she was finally calming down, her rational thoughts at last returning.
“And neither are you. That’s what matters, right?” Weiss didn’t even need to open her eyes to know that a gentle smile was on Ruby’s lips.
“Right.” It came out like a prayer.
“We made a promise, remember?” Blake finally spoke again, knowing that the worst of it was over.
Weiss nodded. Of course she did. They promised to stay together, stay team RWBY until the bitter end and then some.
“And there’s no breaking that promise. Can’t get rid of us even if you tried, Ice Queen,” Yang joked, squeezing Weiss even more. Her voice was still gentle though, cautious with her jokes and tempering the water. Weiss knew.
“Guess I’m stuck with your boorish manners forever then,” Weiss joked back.
It was her and Yang’s code. Jabs to hide the you’re okay, right?
Yang pulled back and grinned brightly. “Yup!”
Weiss returned the smile. “Thank the maidens we have Blake to reign you in then, Temper Tantrum. ”
Yang gave her a lighthearted glare with none of her usual heat while Blake tried to hide a chuckle behind her hand. “Glad to have you back here with us on Remnant, Weiss.” The relief in Blake’s voice was easy to hear.
“Thank you for the warm welcome.” She then let out a yawn, exhausted.
A light chuckle emanated from in front of her where Ruby still hovered close, not quite letting Weiss out of her arms. Weiss was happy for it, it helped to ground her further.
“I’m sorry for waking yo–”
“Nuh-uh. Nope. None of that,” Ruby vehemently shook her head.
“She’s right. You always wake up for us despite your oh so precious beauty sleep,” her blonde teammate teased. “You really still think we wouldn’t do the same?”
Blake subtly smacked Yang. “What she means is that we’re all here for each other.”
“I know that. But it’s still late,” Weiss yawned again, “and I did interrupt our sleep.”
“Sounds like we try and get some shut eye then, right?” Ruby asks, standing to look the other two in the eye. But her hands moved to hold Weiss’ once more. “I’m thinking we all sleep in and go out for brunch in the morning after we wake up.”
“Sounds like a plan to me!”
“Me too.”
“Yeah, that would be pretty nice,” Weiss smiles fully now as she looks up at her teammates, her family. “Thank you.”
“Of course,” three voices ring out in harmony, like it was the only natural response. Mostly because it was for the four of them.
Blake and Yang shuffle out of the kitchen, trying to hide the yawns that they had been stifling the whole after making sure that Weiss was completely fine. Besides, they knew she was in good hands. It was time to sleep.
A plain cup of water was placed on the table in front of her. She hadn’t even realized that Ruby had let go of her hands to grab her one. She took the cup without any words, sipping it greedily till it was all gone.
“Ready for bed then, Princess?” Ruby asked with all the care in the world.
Fatigue had caught up to Weiss then and only gave her partner a simple nod. Her exhaustion didn’t stop the slight blush on her cheeks from the nickname though.
“Alright then, let me put this cup in the sink then we can go back to bed,” Ruby says while pressing a kiss onto her girlfriend’s forehead. Weiss just sits and watches Ruby move.
Then she feels herself being lifted off the chair in the arms of her beloved.
“Wait, Ruby, you don’t need to carry me. You must be tired too. I can walk to our room myself, silly.” It all comes out in a breathy laugh, betraying her true feelings about being princess carried.
“I know, but I want to anyways,” shining silver eyes and an equally glimmering smile reassure her.
And she let her. She liked knowing that her partner’s strong and reassuring arms held her. That her shoulders weren’t heavy from carrying the weight of the world, that they were only carrying her light frame instead. Weiss pressed her ear to Ruby’s chest, listening for the rhythmic beating she searched for every night. The steady thump thump thump that guaranteed her partner’s place next to her, that she was here, that she was safe. That she was herself.
The climb up the stairs was slow, careful to not upset their balance unless they wanted to tumble down. They passed by Blake and Yang’s room, hearing the snores of the latter permeate through. Weiss smiled at them.
They soon came to their room and she was placed delicately on her side of the bed. Then Ruby laid down on her side, her weight shifting the bed. Weiss turned and fit herself in under Ruby’s chin, snuggling up to the stronger and taller body of her warm partner.
“We’re going to need to get you a new mug, y’know,” Ruby said, cutting through the comfortable silence.
“We can get one tomorrow.”
“Yeah.”
It got quiet again. Weiss knew that Ruby only spoke because not all the tension had left her body yet, Ruby was just trying to open the door for her to talk. So talk she did.
“You won’t do it again, right? You won’t drink that tea and leave.” Leave me alone. Leave me forever. She didn’t dare utter those fears aloud, worried it might speak it into existence.
She heard Ruby’s quick intake of breath. “I won’t. Not again. I didn’t want to be Ruby Rose back then.”
“And now?”
“I like being Ruby Rose now. So there’s no need to escape this life.” Even on the days where I don’t feel like Ruby Rose. Weiss could read between the lines.
But that’s why she was here. Why their whole team was here. They were here to remind her that she didn’t need to be Ruby Rose, leader of team RWBY, the silver eyed warrior and savior of the world, all the time and could be only Ruby, the adorable goofball with a heart of gold and their best friend. Someone allowed to fail because she wouldn’t be alone.
“That’s good. I’m quite fond of Ruby Rose.”
Ruby let out a chuckle. “Great to hear. I’d be worried if you weren’t after all the times I’ve kissed you.”
Weiss’ smile only broadened. “Thank you for reminding me.”
Weiss comes out of her safe space in the crook of Ruby’s shoulder. She leans up on one arm and stares into the lightly gleaming eyes of her partner that she swore could rival all stars in the sky combined. She cups Ruby’s face with one hand and presses a deep kiss on her lips.
“Goodnight, my love.” She whispered onto Ruby’s lips. She pressed once more. “And thank you.”
Ruby pressed one more kiss back before allowing Weiss to fall back into her place on bed.
“Of course. I take team attack ‘teacup’ very seriously every time.” It came out grim despite the light tone. They all hated that word and hated seeing one in person even more, but when one of them was reminded of that horrible experience in the Ever After, they were the only ones that could bring comfort to each other. The devastation never left them and they always needed the reassurance that they were all still here. They may have changed, they all have scars down to their souls, but the one thing that never changed was their love for one another.
“I know you do. We all do.” She takes a deep breath, sucking in the scent of her partner before starting to feel sleep overtake her. “And Ruby?”
“Yes Weiss?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
And she was pulled back into rest, curled safely in her beloved partner’s arms. They were all safe. They were all home. They were all together. And no teacup would take them away from each other or themselves again.