Chapter Text
Haymitch doesn’t really understand how it came to happen, but one minute Hazelle Hawthorne cornered him in a hallway and, quite frankly, scared him a bit; and the next second, Haymitch had his arms full of the youngest Hawthorne, Posy. And he was late for command.
Well, shit.
☆
He didn’t miss the way everybody froze when he entered command. Granted, he had a toddler on his shoulders, who was wearing a pink tshirt and had her hair up in two pony tails, and Posy was quite busy braiding Haymitch’s hair.
While most people were highly amused, Effie looked … disappointed, for some reason Haymitch couldn’t begin to comprehend. But she was also the only one to come to his side.
‘And who is this?’, Effie asked sweetly.
‘Posy Hawthorne’, Haymitch grumbled, and he saw understanding in Effie’s eyes. She also sighed, seemingly relieved, which, again, didn’t make a lot of sense to him.
‘And you’re babysitting?’, Effie went on, a smirk on her lips.
‘Her mother is surprisingly scary.’
Of course, Posy tugged on his hair a bit too hard then, making Haymitch yelp and the whole room ended up in a fit of giggles, no matter how much he glared and grumbled profanities under his breath.
‘Posy, sweetheart’, Effie finally said, grabbing a hold of her hands and stilling them, even if they were still in his hair. ‘Haymitch has to work now, so how about you and me go sit down, and do some drawing.’
Posy slapped her little hands on top of Haymitch’s head. ‘You have paper?’, she shrieked.
‘Yes, well, not a lot’, Effie winked. ‘But I’m willing to share.’
‘Can I, Mister Haymitch?’, Posy asked then, gently pushing her fingers to his beard. ‘Pretty please?’
‘Oh course’, Haymitch put her down on the floor. ‘But you be good to Effie, okay? And quiet, we do have work to do.’
Posy nodded, clearly excited, and boldly grabbed a hold of Effie’s hand. Haymitch saw her surprise, but it didn’t take long before she smiled down at the kid jumping up and down by her side and guided her to the far side of the table.
Haymitch forgot she was even there for the next two hours, but when Plutarch dismissed him, he had to stifle a laugh. Posy was asleep with her head on the table, various papers and crayons laid around her, and Effie was sitting next to her. In one hand, she had a tablet, and she was avidly reading something off of it, but her other hand was absently petting Posy’s hair, which was now free of her pony tails.
Haymitch wordlessly picked Posy up, and she woke up, just enough to wrap her hands around his neck and snuggle to his chest.
‘Let’s put you to bed’, he whispered to her. ‘Can’t have you drooling on the command table, can we?’
‘I don’t drool.’, she mumbled, and Haymitch had to stifle a laugh.
He was half way through to the Hawthorne’s bunk when he realized that Effie was following him. Though, he was thankful she did, especially when it came to changing Posy into pajamas and tucking her in.
‘Mama always sings me a lullaby’, Posy batted her eyelashes at Effie, and it took all of Haymitch’s strength to not laugh on the terrified expression on her face.
‘I don’t know any of your lullabies’, Effie finally said. ‘I didn’t grow up in your District. Maybe Haymitch-‘
‘Haymitch does not sing’, he interrupted her, sternly. Effie glared, but it was gone quickly, especially when Posy put both of her little hands on her face and asked her again.
‘Well, maybe I can think of something, since you have been so well mannered today.’
Posy grinned and pulled the covers up to her neck, making herself comfortable.
Before she started singing, though, Effie looked at Haymitch for a long while. He didn’t understand what she was looking for, and he didn’t understand what she was thinking. Because Effie had a very sad look in her eyes, a look he has never seen before, in the years they had worked together.
But he didn’t look away.
Finally, Effie smiled, looking incredibly shy. When she turned to Posy, she started petting her hair and started singing, in a very soft voice.
And after the storm,
I run and run as the rains come
And I look up, I look up
On my knees and out of luck, I look up
Haymitch frowned. For one, because Effie didn’t have that bad of a voice. And secondly, because the song seemed weird.
Night has always pushed up day
You must know life to see decay
But I won’t rot, I won’t rot
Not this mind and not this heart,
I won’t rot
That sounded like Effie. Who, despite being surrounded by murder and gore every Hunger Games, despite having to send two children to the slaughter every year, always came out of it with her head held high and a smile on her lips.
And I took you by the hand
And we stood tall,
And remembered out own land,
What we lived for
And Haymitch was there with her, every step of the way. For years.
There will come a time, you’ll see, with no more tears
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears
Get over your hill and see what you find there
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair
She kept him sane, during the Games. As sane as possible, at least. It just took him a long time to realize it.
Now I cling to what I knew
I saw exactly what was true
But oh no more
That’s why I hold
That’s why I hold with all I have
That’s why I hold
Posy was asleep by now, but Effie didn’t stop singing, even if it was clear that she was holding back tears.
And I won’t die alone and be left there
Well I guess I’ll just go home
Or god knows where
Because death is just so full and man so small
Well I’m scared of what’s behind and what’s before
Effie probably never said words that were truer than these ones. But Haymitch couldn’t help but wonder what was her home now. Where?
And there will come a time you’ll see, with no more tears
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears
Get over you hill and see what you find there
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair
They were both silent for a while, after Effie stopped singing. Haymitch’s mind was whirling, with so many thoughts and questions, but he settled on a single one, that seemed the most important at the moment.
‘That didn’t sound like a Capitol approved song.’, he whispered, thankfully not waking Posy up.
Effie smiled, a bit, as she wiped at her eyes.
‘It’s not’, she said, finally turning to look at Haymitch. It didn’t last long, her eyes going to Posy again, but she did start explaining.
‘My father was a historian, and his passion was the time before the Dark Days. In his travels, he found this device, an archaic way of playing music. It was called a record player, and the records were large, black circles. I never understood the science behind it, but I liked the songs.’
She took a few seconds to collect her thoughts before she continued.
‘He wasn’t allowed to keep them, but he did.’, she smiled then. ‘A wonderful act of rebellion, I should say. And, of course, my parents were killed in an accidental fire that most likely wasn’t an accident on the year I started working as an Escort, so most of the records were lost. I had a few, at my apartment, but… who knows what happened to them now?’
It took a while for Haymitch to manage to say something.
‘It’s a great song.’, he settled on.
‘Yes’, Effie smiled at him. ‘Quite uplifting.’
Haymitch wrinkled his nose. ‘I wouldn’t say that.’
‘Oh, but it is’, she smiled wider, looking back to Posy. ‘Kept me sane during all those Games. Gave me hope when I shouldn’t have had any. It is a great song.’
Neither of them had anything more to say.
Half an hour later, after Hazelle came back, Haymitch wordlessly walked Effie to her quarters, but she stopped him from leaving, with a soft hand on his arm.
‘We’re doing the right thing, aren’t we?’, she looked scared, unusually so. ‘This war, it’s the right thing to do, isn’t it? For the kids? Not the ones we lost, not the ones we’re losing, but for the kids we aren’t going to lose anymore.’
Haymitch sighed, but it an equally unusual act of kindness, he wiped away Effie’s wet cheeks and brought her to his chest.
She gasped, slightly, when she realized that Haymitch was hugging her, but she did relax quickly enough.
‘We’re doing the right thing’, Haymitch said, willing conviction into his voice. ‘I’m not sure if the way is right, but we’re doing the right thing. Now come on.’
He pulled away, still keeping a hand on her neck.
‘Back straight, chin up, attitude.’
Those were very weird words coming out of Haymitch’s mouth. But he has spent years hearing her say them, they were drilled into his brain by this point.
And they did the job, considering Effie smiled, and she lifted her head up.
Haymitch smirked, how could he not, even if he put some distance between them.
‘Don’t let Plutarch hear you sing that song, princess, he’ll make it even more important than The Hanging Tree.’
Effie rolled her eyes, even if she was smiling. She told him goodnight and went into her room without looking back.
Haymitch, however, stood in front of her locked door an embarrassing about of time.
He thought of every time Effie surprised him. There were quite a few times, over the years, and it was always when Effie showed a sign of… humanity, that he was so unused to seeing in the Capitol.
She got attached to some of the tributes, crying when they died. She tried to find out their favorite food on the first day, and made sure to always have it on the table. When there were young children, close to the age of 12, she held them while they cried. She was always kind to them, when the cameras were off. And she always tried to keep Haymitch in check, making sure he was doing his job, training the kids as much as he could.
And, really, after years of that, Effie singing a forbidden song to an adorable child shouldn’t have surprised him. But it did.
Haymitch didn’t have time to think about it too much, though. They were in the middle of a war and Katniss was waiting for him in command.
He’ll think about it when the war is over. He’ll think about her.
After the storm, indeed.