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Two Types of Fear

Summary:

Escapril 2023 day 24: Fear

In the castle even after the war, fear still fills the air. But fear is always there, no matter what, and so two types of fear appear.

Aka Nikolai and Zoya both hide their fear, but both are scared of very different things.

Notes:

The amount of times I wrote the date today and wanted to write 2022 and almost had an existential crisis. 😭

Anyway, this would kind of be set after season 2 I suppose or just before KoS, it doesn’t really matter. All that matters is that Nikolai is hiding everything he feels so he doesn’t seem weak and Zoya is doing the same but with different feelings. Enjoy!

Work Text:

Fear

A constant companion

To everyone here

In the castle

 

Each had their own reasons

Own things to fear

Most stemmed from the war seasons

Seemingly ever near

The war won too still haunted

Memories of the fallen general

Wide eyes, all taunted

Though the possibility of his return were null

 

Even so, they all held fear close

Some ignoring it

Some embracing it

Fear was good in their minds

Keeping them alert

Others pushed it aside

And continued to flirt

 

The King himself

Was the embodiment of fear

Though it never showed

Except to anyone he kept near

He had many reasons to be afraid

Enemies surrounded him

Just waiting to be betrayed

Looking proper and prim

Just waiting to invade

He also feared the plague of darkness

In himself and his Queen-to-be

He also feared an uprising

Always watching what was put in his tea

But he had also promised

Himself and others

That he would not rule with fear

He couldn’t rule weak

Lest they look at him with a sneer

 

The rest of the castle

Was the same way

Being scared too much of a hassle

But again, each feared something different didn’t they?

 

One such girl

Thought of herself as the world

Powerful as she was

She too feared something

Something very different though because

She feared people, learning about her

About where she came from

She feared her past

Would be all that was asked

To her, upbringing was vital

She herself came from humble beginnings

How could she ever have a title?

She’d worked to hard

To let that go

So she made sure

That nobody would know

About her past

But also the present

The fact that she had feelings

For someone she knew

Someone she loved

Even after all they’d been though

But it could never be so she shoved

Her love aside

And behind her carefully crafted image

Would she hide

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