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The Interdarshan Championship draws to a close, and with the final step of conveying the truth to Kaveh completed, so too does Alhaitham’s lengthy investigation into Sachin’s research see its conclusion.
In spite of what he’s shared, Alhaitham isn’t naive enough to think that Kaveh will truly find closure for his twenty-year burden in the short-term. Perhaps he may even regress, and fall back into old habits that have been ingrained in him since he was a child. But, at the very least, Kaveh’s reaction to the discovery had been a favourable one, meaning that Alhaitham had accomplished all that he had set out to do. Much like confirming a hypothesis after months and months of experimentation and bringing a long academic project to an end, Alhaitham is left with a vague sense of satisfaction, and decides to leave Kaveh to his own devices for the next little while. After all, he surely still needs time to process all that he’s learned, and Alhaitham doesn’t want to interfere with that time.
He retires to his room for the night, ready to end the day with his newest read when the door creaks open. Curious, Alhaitham glances up over the top of his book towards the entrance to his room.
It’s Kaveh. With his shoulders slumped and eyes downcast, Kaveh looks like the very picture of despondence—or maybe loneliness—and Alhaitham raises an eyebrow when Kaveh neither says a word nor moves an inch from the doorway.
“Yes?”
Kaveh remains silent still, but he slowly moves closer until he’s by the bedside. And then, he all but collapses into it, practically falling on top of Alhaitham and eliciting a startled grunt from the latter as he stares incredulously at the human-shaped bundle of cloth now clinging to his side.
“...What are you doing?”
Kaveh curls a little closer. His fingers dig into Alhaitham’s clothes. “Just let me stay here for a while, okay?” Kaveh mumbles, his voice muffled by Alhaitham’s clothes.
Though he can recognize that Kaveh wants some form of physical comfort, Alhaitham is unable to resist a soft, exasperated sigh. He makes note of the page he was on, shuts his book, and places it down beside him. Then, he shifts slightly to better accommodate Kaveh on the bed, nestling a hand into Kaveh’s hair.
“Didn’t you say you had designs to get back to after the competition was over?” he asks as his fingers slowly muss through the mess of blond.
“It’s fine… I can take a small break…”
“Hm. Don’t complain about this in the morning.”
“You’re so annoying…”
The words lack any real bite. Kaveh is clearly too exhausted, emotionally or otherwise, to put up much of a fight this time, and Alhaitham has no desire to prod at him while he’s like this. He says nothing else, content to allow the silence to blanket them until Kaveh suddenly speaks up again.
“Hey… Is there anything you need?”
Alhaitham looks down at Kaveh, who’s now practically glued to his side. “What’s this all of a sudden?”
“Cyno paid me a lot for the limited-edition TCG card, so… I can treat you to a meal, since you missed out on our dinner. Or… Maybe there’s something you want to buy at the market? You said you were looking for new furniture, right? I can buy that for you too. Since I’m your senior, I should spoil you every once in a while.”
The connection isn’t immediately apparent to Alhaitham, who spends a single, very brief moment trying to puzzle out why Kaveh would want to treat him to a meal he had already brought him leftovers for. Kaveh is clearly trying to do something for him, most likely in return for the effort he had put forth in bringing him the truth, but Alhaitham hadn’t carried out his investigation expecting a reward—the fact that he had even received acknowledgement for it at all had been something of a pleasant surprise.
But this is how Kaveh is. Hopelessly sentimental, helplessly caring…and unyieldingly warm.
And knowing that his forlorn senior, in his endless string of unnecessary thoughts born from unabating kindness, may eventually find some way to twist this turn of events so that he can find something to feel guilty about, Alhaitham decides to nip the bud before it can truly form.
“The remainder of your funds is better spent towards paying your bills for the month,” Alhaitham says, “but if you really want to pay me back, I wouldn’t be opposed to hearing you thank me a fourth time.”
“Ugh, you…!”
That’s enough to get Kaveh riled up. His previous dejection all but forgotten in an instant, he pushes himself up and off of Alhaitham, glaring down at him as he hovers over him on the bed. His face is turning red.
“Can’t you just accept an upperclassman’s generosity without being so contrarian for once?!”
Alhaitham remains on his back, quite content to watch as the blushing Kaveh grows ever more flustered, though it scarcely shows on his stoic expression; the only indication of his amusement is the muted warmth in his eyes, which Kaveh doesn’t seem to perceive. “Oh? Then you’d be willing to buy me another wooden statue without complaint?”
“Not that! Be reasonable!”
“I’m being plenty reasonable. You said you would buy me any piece of furniture that I wanted, and the price of that statue is surely within your budget, even when accounting for everything else.”
“It’s not about the money, it’s the aesthetic! I don’t want my Mora to go into something so ugly! Why are you so obsessed with those wooden carvings, anyway?! Do you even realize how much something like that would clash with the rest of the living room?!”
“I thought you were the one treating me? I wasn’t aware that this so-called ‘upperclassman’s generosity’ you speak of comes with strings attached.”
“You--!”
“If you’re inquiring into my needs, then rest assured, they’ve already been met.”
He interjects clearly, steadily, his even voice cutting through the heated atmosphere before he and Kaveh can devolve into a true argument, and it’s enough to stop Kaveh in his tracks. Losing steam quickly, the architect can only stare, blinking, at Alhaitham.
“What?”
“I don’t need anything,” Alhaitham says again, reiterating his point in simpler terms. “The basic necessities are within reach for me at all times, allowing me to pass my days quite comfortably. I currently don’t require anyone to provide for me, and I hope to keep it this way.”
“That’s not what I meant, and you know it! I just…” The aura of anger dissipates as quickly as it appeared, leaving Kaveh all fizzled out; there’s still not as much fight in him as there usually is. He looks away guiltily. “All this time, you were doing all these things without me knowing… And I was so…”
“We’ve known each other for this long already, so you should be well aware by now that I do as I please. Be that as it may, it doesn’t change my present circumstances, nor my current lack of ‘needs.’” Alhaitham hums softly. “Hm… But if you were to inquire into my ‘wants,’ perhaps my answer would be different.”
Kaveh looks up again, giving Alhaitham a flat stare. Annoyance seems to have replaced the guilt, which was certainly one of Alhaitham’s aims. “You’re really going to argue with me about my word choice? Really? Right now, when I’m trying to have a serious heart-to-heart with you? You Haravatat scholars are something else,” Kaveh grumbles, then lowers himself down onto the bed again, defeated. “Fine… Then tell me what you want. Even if it’s that wooden statue, I’ll buy it for you.”
“At this point in time, there’s nothing that I want,” Alhaitham replies, and Kaveh’s temper flares up again. He doesn’t have enough energy to raise himself up completely, but he pushes himself onto his elbows and leans over to glare at Alhaitham.
“Then what was that all about?! Why are you being so difficult right now?!”
Alhaitham sighs. Kaveh is always loud, but at this proximity, the volume of his voice is really making Alhaitham’s ears ring. “Didn’t you hear what I just said? I was implying that what I want isn’t attainable. Not with the way things are at present, anyway,” he adds after a brief pause.
“Huh?” His countenance ever telling, Kaveh’s expression easily morphs from one of indignation to a mixture of confusion, bewilderment, frustration, and hope. “Wait, what do you mean? Then there is something you want? You’re not making any sense. Just stop beating around the bush and—”
He trails off, perhaps because he’s noticed the way Alhaitham gazes at him, equal parts tender, fond, and longing, and Alhaitham makes no move to veil what he’s showing. Regardless of what he sees, it’s enough to steal the words right from Kaveh’s lips and banish them into nothingness.
Then, the moment is gone. Alhaitham rolls onto his side, his back facing Kaveh.
“I’m going to fall asleep in seven minutes. If you have anything else you’d like to say, I encourage you to say it now, or you’ll have to wait until morning.”
“Wha--you can't just--don’t treat this like your office hours! Hey! Alhaitham!”
Despite Kaveh kicking up another fuss right beside him, Alhaitham finds himself awash in the comfort of their proximity, and soon begins drifting off.
He doesn’t hold any hope of Kaveh grasping the true meaning of his words. There had been many an occasion in the past where Alhaitham had hinted at similar things to Kaveh, only to be questioned for his true intentions, labeled as insincere, misinterpreted, or otherwise brushed off.
But that’s fine. Even if Kaveh were to remain oblivious for the rest of their lives, even if he were to find his happiness and freedom elsewhere, Alhaitham would accept it.
That, he knows, is the essence of unconditional love.