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Summary:

Bad crouched down next to Callahan, pointing up into the walls of netherrack that boxed them all in. “It’s inside a cavern in that wall. You see that cliffside all the way up there?” Tina’s eyes locked on where Bad’s clawed finger pointed at.

It was high.

Impossibly high.

“Go down a few tunnels and you’ll find your portal.”

Callahan kept nodding, eyes trained on the cliffside, as if it would disappear if he looked away for even a second. After he was treated, Tina served him some hoglin stew, but Callahan shook his head and pushed the bowl away.

//

Or, Tina is a demon living with her nomadic clan. One day, she stumbles upon Callahan close to burning alive by the lava fires, and she takes him in.

Notes:

ah, the Tina one shot. the struggle of my lifetime because there is no SBI/SBI adjacent characters here. Actually I had an easier time writing this than I did the Kristin one shot for some reason. Nonetheless, I really enjoyed writing this, even if I had to sift through old Tina clips of her interacting with Callahan.

title from forward by beyonce

see y'all in the end notes

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

They didn’t get many gods in these parts, so it was a shock to Tina when she saw a horned creature buried in the slopes where netherrack met soul sand, just a few feet away from immolating. She slid down the bend, using all her strength to pull the creature away from the river of lava that rushed past them. 

His eyes were shut in a peaceful manner, but his body was littered with cuts and bruises. His flesh festered with infection in open wounds littered with netherrack debris and the little mites that lived in the ash. He moved like a corpse in that he did not move at all. His body weight was loose and centered and made all of Tina’s efforts infinitely more impossible. 

She managed to get the creature to the top of the hill, away from the lava river. She dropped him once she knew it was safe and fell over from exhaustion, staring up at the wide ceiling of the Nether, the glowstone barely lighting up the darkness of the realm. 

Her eyes wandered over to their strange new visitor. He definitely wasn’t from around here. Tina had never seen a being like this, and the way he dressed wasn’t in line with the adaptations of other creatures that originated here. 

Tina, for instance, had horns on her head, much like the creature, but his were massive and branched off to create new horns. It was like a tree of sharp edges. Hers were small and were good for headbutting. Her skin was hardened and textured like scales to protect her from the heat of the flames and made it harder for her to be punctured by hoglins. She was at the very top of the hierarchy in the Nether, belonging to a clan of nomadic demons. 

Tina had the talent of being familiar with every part of the Nether and yet not knowing anything at all of her surroundings. 

And now there was this creature that was clearly not from this realm, knocked out and vulnerable to the dangers of the Nether. 

Had her clan been here, they would’ve left him for dead, or told Tina to leave him. Perhaps they would have picked him up only to eat him for supper later. Tina didn’t have that same appetite. Perhaps that was why she was always sent out as a ‘gatherer’ rather than a ‘hunter.’ Her aim was as true as anyone else in the clan’s, but she lacked the killing intent that put demons at the top. 

Tina wasn’t due back to camp for a while, so she sat and picked at the netherrack until the creature came to. It took a while-- Tina had no way of knowing how much-- time was measured by the rumbles of their stomach. If they got hungry, they knew it was a new mealtime. 

It was the rumbles of her stomach that pried open the eye of the creature. He had similar eyes to Tina-- white sclera though his irises were a lighter shade of brown than hers-- though the mouth he had he did not use. 

Where am I? He said, picking his head up and looking around wildly. Tina jumped back, startled when she heard his voice in her head rather than pass through his vocal cords. 

“Who are you?” she demanded instead. “Why are you in my head?”

Where am I? He repeated. 

“The Nether!” she fumbled through her belt, unsheathing her hoglin tusk knife and shoving it against his horns. “Answer my questions or I’ll cut your horns off!”

Horns? I don’t have horns. 

“Yes, you do!” Tina began to slice through the horn, but was shocked to find her knife repelled by the sturdiness of it-- not even a single scratch. 

Oh! You must mean my antlers. 

“Questions!” 

The creature picked himself up, dusting the crumbs of netherrack off his attire, wincing when he felt his wounds. I am Callahan. I come from above. This is the way I speak. 

“But you have a mouth?”

Callahan opened his mouth, the orifice hollow with a missing tongue. His teeth were still intact, white and flat, different from the canines Tina’s mouth held. “Did someone eat your tongue?” 

It was what Bad would’ve done. Perhaps this creature had made an enemy of someone more powerful than him. 

I need to find a way out of here, said Callahan. He dug his finger into the loose netherrack and began to draw lines until he had created a picture. A door of some sort, with swirls and particles floating around it. Have you seen this before? It’s purple. 

“No,” said Tina. “Something like that exists down here?”

It should, replied Callahan, it’s a portal to the Overworld. 

“Is that…” Tina tapered off, instead gesturing up to the cavern ceiling. 

Callahan nodded. 

“I don’t know of any portal, but my leader has lived long and has traveled all over the Nether. I’m sure he can help! And we can treat your wounds.”

As much as Tina wanted to ask how he got here and how he got here so hurt, she knew it wasn’t the time. Callahan’s face was tight with focus as he lifted himself off the ground. Tina got up with him, ready to catch him if he were to falter. 

Where to? 


Her clan looked upon their new addition with an unfiltered disdain. They had no qualms with showing their disapproval and even asked to roast him to his face. 

Tina had to take Bad aside to talk. “Can you lay off a little, Bad? He’ll just be here until he’s healed.” 

“I’ve been nothing but a delight!” Tina remained unimpressed. “Alright, alright, I should’ve kept the eating comment behind closed curtains.”

“Thank you. Also… He may need your expertise.” 

Bad patted her shoulder and brought her back to Callahan, who was sitting by the clan’s massive metal pot used for cooking most meals. One of the clan members more well-versed in medicine was cleaning Callahan’s wounds with healing pots won in a trade with some piglins in the neighboring bastion. Bad cringed when he witnessed the clan’s supplies used on an outsider, but he kept his thoughts to himself this time. 

“Hello, Parasite!” Bad greeted. “Tina tells me you’re looking for something.”

It’s Callahan, he corrected. 

“Right. Well, what can I do you for?” 

Portal. It’s purple, usually lit from within using obsidian--

“An Overworlder? I’ve seen a few portals in my time. There’s one nearby, actually.”

Callahan lifted his eyebrows in surprise, hope evident in the way his lips curled up. How close?

“Well,” Bad said, tapping his chin, “It’s pretty high up. It’ll take some climbing. Not really something I recommend in your… State.”

I heal fast. Tell me where! 

Bad crouched down next to Callahan, pointing up into the walls of netherrack that boxed them all in. “It’s inside a cavern in that wall. You see that cliffside all the way up there?” Tina’s eyes locked on where Bad’s clawed finger pointed at. 

It was high. 

Impossibly high. 

“Go down a few tunnels and you’ll find your portal.” 

Callahan kept nodding, eyes trained on the cliffside, as if it would disappear if he looked away for even a second. After he was treated, Tina served him some hoglin stew, but Callahan shook his head and pushed the bowl away. 

Tina rolled her eyes and took it for herself, the bowl tipped from her lips, the contents spilling down her throat quickly. When she finished, she put the bowl in the pile that was accumulating next to the pot. 

She glanced back over at Callahan, noticing how his eyes drooped and his head was lolling back and forth as he sat and watched the fire. She poked him with her finger, rousing him once more. “Are you sleepy? Are the healing pots making you tired?” 

Callahan shrugged.

“Come on, I’ll take you to my tent.” They got up, heading over to a small triangular tent made of hoglin leather. Inside was a simple lamp and a sleeping pad with a light sheet over it. Tina stood at the entrance, wondering what she should do about the missing second sleeping pad. The ground was warm, but sleeping on netherrack would exacerbate the damage done to Callahan’s body and make him heal slower. 

She pointed to the sleeping pad with regret. “There. Sleep there.” 

Callahan didn’t need to be told twice, diving onto the sleeping pad and curling up into a ball, making himself as small as possible. He sort of reminded Tina of a pet in a way-- though she was a little hesitant to be calling a sentient creature something of a pet.

Tina made herself comfortable on the ground next to Callahan, knees drawn to her chest, fingers tapping on the scales on her shin as she kept eying Callahan. She didn’t mean to, it was just that he was so strange. 

“Hey, Callahan? How did you get here?” she asked. She hoped he hadn’t fallen asleep just yet. 

His hand darted out from the sleeping pad and into the netherrack, playing around with the little particles he picked up. I think I was cast out. 

“Cast out? Like from your clan?” In demon culture, getting cast out of one’s clan was fairly normal. Tina’s particular clan was nomadic, but they still had laws and customs they lived by, and if one did not heed them, they would be punished accordingly. The highest offense was being cast out; it was the same as being left for dead. 

It happened often because most demons don’t like rules and they don’t like leadership. It was a wonder any clans lived long enough to see new generations, but Bad had a special hold on their clan. Nobody had been cast out of Tina’s clan in many years. Perhaps the last would’ve been the demon that fell in love with an Overworlder and had a child with her. 

No, not a clan. Something similar, maybe. 

“And you don’t know for sure you’ve been cast out?” 

I think I was bad. I’ve been bad before. 

“Bad how?” 

Misbehave. 

“Oh.” 

That’s why my tongue is gone. I misbehaved. DreamXD doesn’t like when his pets misbehave. 

Tina froze, chills running down her spine. She had been joking when she said Callahan acted like a pet. It was a throwaway comment. That was what it was meant to be-- that was all it was meant to be-- how could it be that there was a being that would treat Callahan like a pet? How could a being put a sentient life in the palm of his hands and mean to destroy it?

“Are you trying to get back to the Overworld to see… DreamXD?” 

Callahan made a dismissive gesture with his hand, unbothered to move his head. I need to be in the Overworld to get to where DreamXD is. In this place… It’s unreachable to a god. 

“God?”

You don’t have many of those down here, I guess. 

“We’re a godless place. Just like you said.” Tina adjusted her position so she was laying on her side, facing Callahan. Her hand inched forward, the tip of her claw tracing a pattern on his hand. “What’s it all like? What’s the universe like outside of the Nether?” 

It’s blue. And it’s warm, but not because of fire, but because of the sun. There are lots of animals. They make fun noises… I like cats the best. I think you’d like them too. Rather than netherrack, there’s dirt and grass. 

“It sounds beautiful.”

People can actually tell time in the Overworld. When it’s time to sleep, it becomes dark and the moon and the stars come out. 

“Sometimes, when the glowstone breaks, it gets all dark. The dust sort of falls on you and it glitters. Over arms and legs, on the netherrack…” 

That’s nice too.

“Yeah… yeah! It is. It can be…” Tina trailed off. “Have you been to lots of places in the Overworld?” 

I’ve overseen it all. 

“Are you a god too?” 

By barest definitions. But I wouldn’t be presumptuous. There was a bit of humor in his voice as it echoed in Tina’s head. It was different from the tone he took prior. Have you ever thought about going, now that you know there’s a way?

Tina curled her hand into a fist, cradling it close to herself. “No. No, I wouldn’t even know where to begin…” 

You’re a nomad, aren’t you? 

“The clan is.” 

You don’t like it? 

“I can’t be the first to ever want a home?” she asked with a wry smile. She turned around so her back was to Callahan and shut her eyes, letting sleep take over. 


It was Tina’s stomach that woke both of them up. The smell of stew wafted in the dense, hot air. She wondered if Callahan would be eating today.

He didn’t. 

It occurred to Tina that perhaps the food down here wasn’t built for a being like Callahan.

A god. 

“What sort of things do you usually eat, Callahan?” asked Tina as she polished off her plate. 

Callahan shrugged. Whatever DreamXD gives me. When I’m good, I get nectar and ambrosia.

“That sounds delicious.” 

It is. I’d let you try some, but you’d probably combust from its pure awesomeness.

Tina tried to hide her expression of disbelief. “That good, huh?” 

While Tina put her plate back, the demon with medical knowledge came over to check on Callahan’s injuries, surprised to find all but one miraculously healed. Even with health potions, it still should’ve taken a couple of days of recovery, especially with the state Callahan was in. Perhaps it was just his superior genes as a god, or maybe sleeping in a nice sleeping pad did wonders for the soul. 

As everyone was coming and going from breakfast, Bad came forward with a large metal pole and banged it against the pot three times, grabbing the attention of everyone in the vicinity. “Hello, hello! I just wanted to say that we’ve been here awhile, and senior leadership has decided that we move on. We leave after third meal’s sleep!” 

Tina glanced over at Callahan before jumping up to pull Bad aside as he walked away. “Bad! Bad, hey! What about-- um-- what about Callahan?” 

 Bad cocked his head to the side. “What about Callahan? Isn’t he heading for the Overworld?” 

“Yes, but he’s still recovering!” 

“I’ve been told he’s already completely healed.” 

“Well… Yes… But it’s his soul that needs healing.” 

“Tina, what? We’re not staying put for something like that. Go pack your tent.” 

Tina moped the entire way to her tent. She arranged all of her things into a sack and then sat on her sleeping pad as she stared into the netherrack, lost in her thoughts. She couldn’t just abandon Callahan. What if he hurt himself on his way up to the portal? What if there wasn’t even a portal up there? 

“Callahan!” she called out, looking wildly back and forth for the god, only to find him sitting outside the tent like a piglin brute protecting a bastion. “Oh. Um-- I-- I was thinking. My clan is leaving, but I feel bad about leaving you alone… So, I thought--” Tina shook her head, her disoriented thoughts lining up in a row. “Look, this DreamXD doesn’t treat you well. He doesn’t deserve you, Callahan. So I think you should stay here. With me.” 

Callahan just stared up at her with an undiscerning gaze. She couldn’t see through his eyes to read his thoughts. Finally, he spoke. I can’t stay here. 

Tina’s head dropped. “I know.” 

But you don’t have to stay here either. 

“This is my clan. I can’t-- I can’t leave them.” 

You will never find a home with them. We can find one together. In the Overworld. 

“That’s crazy talk,” she said, her mind already picturing the things he called grass and dirt and the moon and the stars. “It’s just crazy.” 

You could meet a cat. 

“Callahan.” 

I’m leaving for the portal after your next mealtime. 


Perhaps her mind was already made up then. Perhaps she had been enchanted by nothing but words, but the passion of the unknown and the desire to experience beauty as much as she had experienced the ugly were enough for Tina to finish packing her bags, taking down her tent, and then bowing deeply to Bad, relaying to him her decision.

Callahan waited by the slopes of netherrack, his eyes sparkling with joy when he saw Tina climb over the mounds with her sack on her back. 

The climb took two hours. Two hours of slipping, missteps, burning joints, and finally, a tall, impressive obsidian structure with purple matter swirling within, beckoning Tina forward. 

You may feel dizzy after stepping through. It’s normal, warned Callahan. Tina gripped her sack tightly and went in head first, her vision swimming as the landscape changed around her. One minute she was in a dark cavern with no light save for the portal, and the next she was in an open field of green, something bright and oppressive shining down on her. 

Tina stepped out of the portal and tripped, falling onto the green with a startled gasp. It was soft on her knees. 

When Callahan stepped out, he was quick to help her back to her feet.

He was right. It was quite blue. All of it. Above was blue with specks of white fluff floating in the air, and a small bright circle that was far more blinding than glowstone. Next to the green was blue lava resting in a pond.

The air was crisp and clear and it all just felt so beautiful. 

At her feet, a creature approached. It was small and black with pointed ears and green eyes. It rubbed up against her leg, a small war cry released from its mouth.

That’s a kitten. It’s a baby cat. Go on. Pet it. 

Tina crouched back down, hand outstretched as her palm slid through the soft fur of the kitten, a small smile painted on her face, a feeling of home etched in her heart already.

Notes:

I had to keep the cast in this one shot tight otherwise it would've been longer and, well, not in this economy. Tina and Callahan have fun adventures in the overworld, making new friends yadayadayada

i just know this one's gonna be the least popular of the bunch; i thought it would be the sally one shot but honestly now i'm not so sure

if you like the women of the dreamsmp, I encourage you to check out the other works in this series

and: follow me on twitter @seasonaltherapy and on tumblr @seasonal-depression-club