Chapter Text
Matthew might have felt like a walking zombie, but hey! At least he was a happy, idol zombie!
It had just been just a few weeks since the show ended and the schedules already felt unending. Except when they do actually end and the group had to instantly go to rehearsal. Followed by a photoshoot. Then more rehearsals.
Yes, Matthew was exhausted, but at least he was an idol! Nothing could stop the cheesing that Matthew was doing at all times. His smile was bright. Megawatt.
He was doing what he dreamed of doing. His voice was on a song that he sang on and it was playing in cafes! His voice was on a popular song! He had done it.
And he did it with this team! The eight other guys were truly a dream. Sometimes he found himself just looking at all of them and smiling. Like a proud father or something.
Not to pick favorites- Ricky and fans were always trying to make him do it anyway- but he got to debut with Jiwoong hyung and Hanbin hyung! And Hanbin got to debut with Hao! And Hao with Ricky! And Ricky with Yujin and Gyuvin and Gunwook and Taerae! It was all so incredible and novel to Matthew still.
Some nights, when he just couldn't stop that excitement buzzing around under his skin, he would sneak out of the room he shared with Gunwook and would creep across the hall over to Hanbin’s room. The other man never seemed surprised when prodded awake, and would make room in the tiny bed for Matthew to slide in. His roommate, Gyuvin, was always dead to the world. Face down on his bed, so he never seemed to wake up to their late night whispers.
It reminded Matthew of when they trained together and he and Hanbin would sneak away and have deep conversations about their hopes and dreams. But now the conversations were about how they were actually living their hopes and dreams that they once talked about. Hanbin knew how much this meant to Matthew and Matthew knew how much this meant to Hanbin. To have someone who supported him for so long with him all the time? It was like Matthew saved a kingdom in his passed life and this was his reward.
And they got to be around each other all the time! Sure, the dorms were a little small, but they were a group of nine men. Most places would feel small to them.
But nothing would feel as cramped as the bunk bed dorms on Boys Planet. So really, two or three to a room was a breeze.
One of the nicest thing about the dorm to themselves was that they kept it stocked up with food at all times. Jiwoong hyung took care of most of the real cooking though, not trusting most of the group passed boiling packages of ramyeon.
They had tons of snacks! Sure, they were all technically on a diet, but with the amount of dancing they were doing they needed to eat a lot to keep their energy up.
So, when Matthew's little tummy was rumbling at midnight, he hopped up so quickly, thinking about what he could grab from the kitchen.
Noodles would take too long… There might be some cookies still? Unless Gyuvin snatched those. Maybe some of those gummies that Taerae keeps hidden at the back of the pantry… Matthew still hadn't figured out where Ricky was stashing his fancy chips.
The light from the kitchen stopped Matthew's food musings. He could hear soft voices from where he was in the hallway. He was about to announce himself as to not spooky whoever was also up and rummaging for food, when he heard his name.
Okay, so Matthew wasn’t known to eavesdrop or be very nosey, but hadn't everyone always ever wondered what people said about them when they're not there? Want to be a fly on the wall? And Matthew had that chance right now. He was going to jump on it.
So yeah, arrest him for being a snoop. He flattened himself against the wall near the doorway, not daring a peek inside the room, but those ears were open.
“...like three times, hyung. I don’t know though, I’m usually asleep.” That was Gyuvin.
“What are they usually doing, when they’re,” There was a soft cough. “Y’know, together?” That was Jiwoongie hyung.
Matthew felt a little guilty for listening in, but now hearing who was talking his interest was at an all time high. What could these two be talking about Matthew for? Were they going to shit talk him? While objectively that would be hilarious, Matthew didn't like the idea of Jiwoong complaining about him. He had to keep listening to make sure that he fixed whatever it was he had done wrong.
“They usually just whisper for a while and Matthew hyung sometimes falls asleep but sometimes leaves after a while,” Gyuvin replied.
“So do you think that Matthew has… feelings for Hanbin?” ” Jiwoong sounded like he really had to force that word out. “What about Zhang Hao?”
Gyuvin didn’t answer at first but there was a rustling sound and what sounded like a light thump. “I dunno? Maybe Matthew has a crush on Hanbinnie. They’ve known each other for a long time. Doesn’t mean Hanbin likes him back. Maybe it’s… What’s that word? Irrevocably? Unresisted?”
“Unrequited?”
“Yeah, unrequited!”
Matthew's face was burning hot. That was not the type of talk he was expecting to hear. That was–
This was so mortifying!
Matthew didn’t like Hanbin! Hanbin was his hyung! His best friend! They edited baby noises around them on the show! Not romantic music! They had a family edit!
The idea made him sick.
Oh god, why were these two even talking about this?
“You don’t know if Hao knows about Matthew going to Hanbin’s bed some nights?” Jiwoong asked. Oh no.
“I mean, no? I haven't really been paying attention. Can I have the bag of cookies now?” There was the rustling of a package exchanging hands.
No way, Jiwoong was interrogating Gyuvin for information about Matthew and Hanbin’s relationship because he must think that Matthew was a homewrecker. That he was the other woman. That would be horrible! Matthew thought they were going to say that he was a bad snorer or something. Not that he was trying to break up Hanbin and Hao!
“Jiwoongie hyung, are you asking me about this because you’re jeal-” Matthew didn’t hear the rest as he practically sprinted back to his room, jumped in bed and covered his head. His thoughts were absolutely spiralling.
Jiwoong hyung was being a standup person and trying to stop Matthew from ruining the perfect relationship budding between Hao and Hanbinnie.
Of course, that was what it looked like from the outside. He was crawling in his bed late at night! He was saying during interviews that he was jealous of Hao and Hanbin’s closeness. He was trying to be funny, but maybe it sounded serious?
Matthew's mind was racing over all the times he had been just so touchy with Hanbin in front of Hao. He was just a tactile guy! He wasn't thinking it would be misconstrued as anything beyond just a friendly handhold or head pat.
Matthew had to fix this. This was so embarrassing. This could destroy the team!
Hao must have thought that he was actually trying to come between them and had been too nice to say anything. Hanbin must have been trying to push Matthew away for the sake of his and Hao’s relationship and Matthew hadn’t even noticed…
Or maybe somehow Matthew had accidentally manipulated Hanbin into not even realising that he was being too friendly.
That was probably it. Matthew was accidentally a master manipulator.
Fuck! Should Matthew ask Jiwoong hyung for help?
No, no, thinking back, that was way too much. Jiwoong had already been trying to help. He’d grabbed Matthew's hand so often (probably to pull him away from Hanbin), and he sat Matthew on his lap when there was not enough chairs (obviously because he thought that Matthew would sit on Hanbin right in front of Hao). Then hyung had been wanting to spend so much time alone with Matthew and asking him to do things together. Always specifcially just them! Jiwoong was obviously trying to stop Matthew from monopolising Hanbin. When he took Matthew to that BBQ place last week he must have been just trying to stop Matthew's advances on Hanbin.
Matthew was so horrified by his own salacious, indecent and just plain lewd, actions.
He had to make a plan.
Step 1: Avoid Sung Hanbin
Doable! There were nine of them. He could get lost in the crowd. Hanbin won't even notice.
Step 2: Subtly let Hao know that Hanbin was all his.
Going right out and saying ‘I’m not in love with Hanbin’ would sound insane. Also, it would sound like he was 100% in love with Hanbin. Matthew had watched too many kdramas. He wasn’t about to get trapped in a miscommunication trope.
No, instead he will subtly hint and let Hao know that he wasn’t interested in Hanbin and that Hanbin was his hyung. Just his hyung. Like it would make him vomit to date him.
Not that Hao was weird for wanting Hanbin or anything… He was just not really Matthew’s type!
No, Matthew was more interested in… well… if he had to pick an ideal type from the team? Matthew supposed it would be Jiwoong hyung. A reliable and good hyung who treated him like an equal. Hanbin always treated him like he was something adorable and would coddle him like someone would their little brother. From Hanbin, that was perfectly fine!
But the idea of someone like Jiwoong doing that made his stomach hurt for some reason…
Back to the steps.
If Step 1 and 2 didn't go well, he’d have to continue to Step 3: Get Jiwoong’s help.
Jiwoong was already on the case. It would make sense for Matthew to ask for his help sooner, but the amount of embarrassment still roiling through him made Matthew pause that line of thought for the time being.
What Matthew really had to do was this: Step 4: Somehow convince Jiwoongie hyung (and Gyuvin but that didn’t feel as pressing) that he actually wasn’t desperately in love with Hanbin.
Maybe Matthew should slip into someone else’s bed at night… That would really throw them off his trail.
The plan was all coming together. He would just switch step 3 and 4 and it should all work out perfectly fine and he’d fix everything!
Matthew fell asleep with his plans and his softly rumbling tummy.