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11:30 pm
The clock fingers pointed accordingly to the time as Wukong stared at it lazily. His eyes were half lidded and only grew more heavier as the clock ticked by. His limbs began suffering the side effects of sleep deprivation as well, his slow movements evident of that. A hand was positioned on the head of the relaxed body atop of him, Macaque’s head lay comfortably on the slowly breathing chest of the basically almost asleep King. His hand staggered briefly, Macaque taking notice of this.
“Y’wanna switch with me?” Macaque inquired softly, head craning up to take a good look at the ginger.
Wukong’s brain lagged for a moment upon hearing the question, his sleep addled brain not properly registering the request. “Ah- what, no! I’m fine,” he muttered out, attempting to return to his previous ministrations.
Brows knitted together, Macaque’s face contorting into discontent. He didn’t question the insistence of his partner initially… until he felt his body begin to nod off again.
“You sure you don’t want to switch with me?” Macaque’s browed quirked up and he peered up at the heavy head of the King still fighting off sleep.
“ Nahhh, I’m fine, trust me. I don’t wanna make you do it.”
Macaque recoiled at the bold statement.
“You say ‘have’ to do it as if It’s a hassle for me, a monkey, to be forced to groom my partner.” Silence followed the interrogation. Wukong turned his head away, trying to save himself the humiliation of saying a pretty boldly stupid thing and being caught for it.
Black eyebrows furrowed more at the prolonged silence, Macaque moving himself up from where he lay so his torso rested on his elbows. He got a better and more dominant view of Wukong. “Don’t tell me you’re still pushing people away, me away when we try to show concern about you,” Macaque’s voice was coated with stern a tone.
“I’m not pushing you away! I just… don’t want to have you doing all that for me,” a quiver buzzed through the uncertain words leaving Wukong’s mouth. At the sound of hearing his own excuse did he actually realize how shaky his argument was.
Macaque cupped Wukong’s face and directed his eyes towards his, “Wukong that is pushing me away. How do you expect us to actually get better if you still aren’t even letting me reciprocate the affection?” His voice wavered on the last word, vocal chords betraying his fighting attempt to cover up his hurt.
All these months, all this time they were spending together, slowly talking, opening up. Macaque thought that Wukong was finally leaving behind that self destructive habit of barricading himself away from everyone and letting himself marinate in his own grief and self imposed obligation of doing everything on his own. The progress he thought Wukong was making, it dwindled in front of him. Almost as if they were back at square one.
He shook his head subtly before heaving out a sharp sigh and hefting himself up to straddle Wukong’s middle. He still continued to cup at the King’s face below him, leaning down so they were a breath away, “You promised that you’d stop isolating yourself. That includes isolating yourself from our own affection. We may live under the same roof but you’re still able to separate yourself emotionally,” Macaque closed his eyes and let out a shaky exhale, “I’m not going to let that happen again.”
Wukong didn’t say anything, silence usually being his go-to response, but his eyes softened.
His body language was usually the thing to communicate his feelings.
“Do you want me to groom you?” Macaque asked.
Again no response, Wukong shifted his gaze away to bluff disinterest. Still stubborn as ever. However the subtle trill that emitted from his throat and the quivering of his tail at the prospect of getting groomed betrayed the angst show the stubborn Sage was trying to put on.
Macaque’s body did a physical eye roll as he took that stubborn silence as a yes, Wukong just being too hard headed to actually suck up his pride and say it himself.
That’s something that will never change.
Lifting himself off of the King below him, the Shadow pushed the awkward mass of fur and muscle that still occupied the spot he intended on taking. Wedging himself between the bed and the ginger, forcing him to move from his spot, he finally pushed Wukong out of the way. He adopted the position Wukong was in earlier and presented himself to the King, opening his arms up and silently requesting for him to take his place laying on top of him.
The still stubborn Sage obliged, but reluctantly, his movements being hesitant and slow.
Eventually getting fed up with the act, two black furred arms wrapped around broad shoulders and yanked down the apprehensive King.
“ I’m supposed to be the dramatic one, not you,” Macaque quipped.
Wukong let out a half hearted growl but otherwise settled down. His cheek squished up against Macaque’s bare chest, the skin to skin contact reminding Wukong all too well of how open he’s being right now.
His back was exposed, his arms were awkwardly folded against his chest, he couldn’t cover his blind spot.
Attempting to combat his growing vulnerability, he unfolded his arms pressed against Macaque’s chest and tried to cover the back of his head before he felt a separate pair cover it instead. Two tanned hands cupped the back of his head and started carefully threading through auburn fur. One hand remained occupied just behind his head while the other busied itself with dancing across the soft fur coating his scalp.
The sudden contact stunned Wukong. His body tensed and his eyes were wide, unblinking. He didn’t know how to react initially, It was almost like his mind lost the instinct of responding to affection.
Something itched in the King’s little mentally stunted brain.
The attention he was receiving began reigniting a habit that Wukong had unknowingly developed during his Journey with the Monk. A habit he felt he had to follow in order to live up to his title of “ The Monkey King.”
In order to repay his misdeeds, he had to provide his services. Whether that means him acquiring food or fetching water, finding a place to house them for the night, or offering up his own life to protect the Monk. He had to compensate for his offenses.
So in an attempt to sate his need to fulfill that inner assigned desire to appease those around him, he began threading his fingers through black fur that surrounded the perimeter of Macaque’s torso. He could only manage a few brief strokes before he felt the slightly colder flesh of his partner’s hands encase his.
“Aht, aht. You’re not gonna groom me. I’m the one returning the favor. You just relax and sleep,” Macaque stated firmly.
Wukong was about to retort with a ‘but‘ , however Macaque pressed a finger to his lips, before he could utter anything out.
“Don’t be smart with me, you’re not good at that,” Wukong gaped his mouth at the offending insult, a little conflicted on whether Macaque was trying to be supportive, or using this as an opportunity to insert his superiority, “A part of you fixing your isolation issue is letting yourself receive from people, and that includes me. You need to receive from people, otherwise you’re just emotionally stunting yourself. And you’ve done a pretty good job at that so far,” Macaque snarked that last line, but his gaze softened.
Wukong let his words marinate in his brain for a moment, Macaque’s rebuttal silencing any argument Wukong had left. He made a good point, one that he couldn’t find himself to disagree with, but he also felt slight shame for being called out in such a way. Almost like a child being caught with cookie crumbs littered on their hands after being questioned for stealing cookies.
With a pout, Wukong lowered his head down to Macaque’s chest and thumped his head onto his muscles, trying to get the point across that he wasn’t happy here doing nothing but will comply for the time being.
Macaque actually rolled his eyes this time and returned to his previous ministrations, digging his fingers gently into soft fur and petting the grumbly ginger laying on top of him.
Now as much as the hard-headed Sage tried to hide it, he couldn’t control the few traitorous trills that left his throat. He tried covering them up with well timed growls but Macaque’s sharp hearing caught them very easily. He laughed softly at the attitude, finding humor in Wukong’s striking resemblance to a cat being petty about it’s owners authority. His hands still dragging across his thick head and massaging at the crown of his scalp.
The heavy chains of sleep started pulling at the Sage’s body, the frequent fluttering of Wukong’s eyelash tickling Macaque’s chest testifying to that. However the accused dozer was still a hard headed prick who continued to fight the need for sleep, continually readjusting his head to prevent himself from releasing the tension from his muscles and relaxing.
Eventually losing his patience with his toddler-for-a-partner, Macaque slid his hands down, securing his fingers along the muscle of Wukong’s back.
If there was one thing the King was a sucker for, it was back massages. The gentle traces of fingers along the old, worn muscle of his back always successfully pulled purrs and trills that not even someone as annoyingly resilient as Wukong could hide.
The stiff muscles of his back slowly ebbed away as his body slackened on top of Macaque. The Sage tried to fight in one last attempt to not give in to the holds of sleep though. He started batting his tail around to release some form of stimulation to keep his mind racing.
His attempts were futile however when Macaque snaked his tail around his and he let out a soft ambient purr.
And then it was game over.
Seeing how hard Macaque was trying to coax him into sleep, seeing how much he was trying to give to him, he thought back to what he said and finally understood what he meant.
He had gotten so used to isolating himself that it became second nature to reject any form of receiving from anyone.
His intricately assembled walls started getting chipped down to reveal the disheveled mind.
His elaborately constructed masks were carefully removed to expose the scars underneath.
Combine all that with the gentle hands treating his tight muscles and the calming noise of his purring, he was fighting too hard against something so pacifying.
It was an unfair battle.
This was how he was going to get better. This was how he was going to heal, so he allowed himself to receive.
He took and gave nothing in return.
He returned no damage back.
Upon feeling the body atop him go lax, Macaque let himself join Wukong in the embraces of sleep.
Favor returned.