Chapter Text
Sayaka Miki was a name, not an identity. For as long as she can remember, Sayaka has never known who she is, or what her purpose was. Everyone insisted people don’t need a justification or a reason to exist, that was the beauty of humanity after all. Humans are a collective of creatures with no real purpose for their existence. They just evolved that way. But it was never enough. It never satisfied Sayaka knowing her existence wouldn’t leave a mark passing as even a dent. As time went on she somewhat came to terms with knowing she would probably never grow on to do something great. Never fully, but she could live with knowing her life and its significance wouldn’t grow into something of notability. She was… Sayaka. Sayaka Miki. A name and a face with nothing really behind it, just someone who existed.
So she lived life, always with a lingering hunger for something for her to really do with herself, but some kind of acknowledgement she would only ever be what she was now. An ordinary girl who wouldn’t amount to anything in the end. It just bothered her sometimes, given who she was surrounded by. Her best friends Madoka and Hitomi knew who they were, and what they wanted to be. Madoka was so caring and sweet that she would never be forgotten by those who met her. She’s going to become someone who changes lives for the better. Hitomi was gorgeous and poised, she was almost like a divine portrait of all Sayaka wanted to be. She was polite, intelligent, beautiful, charming, and most of all, she knew who she was. That alone always ate away at Sayaka, no matter how much she wanted to repress that envy. She loved them both, but it eventually began wearing her down more and more living with the inability to find purpose.
However, after the accident that completely reshaped her childhood best friend Kyosuke’s life, and stole his ability to bless the world with his incredible violin playing, she found… something. She brought him music, and always tried to visit him and do things to make him feel better. It was new. It gave her fulfillment. It gave her an existence. She finally had something that gave her a sense of satisfaction with herself. And that alone is enough. Or, more accurately, was enough.
During her brief and unfortunate entanglement into a witch’s labyrinth, she discovered something that would completely change everything about the course of her life. Her best friend Madoka, and her now friend Mami were magical girls. They were saving the world from the devastation of witches, all because of a deal with a creature named Kyubey. From then on, she would follow along with them from time to time, watching them fight and win against these horrific creatures. However, even with all their victories, it was becoming increasingly clearer not just that being a magical girl isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, but that something… terrible happening is an inevitable end to their fate. Their injuries were horrific to watch, some gained from protecting her. They almost died in front of her multiple times. It was disturbing and deeply unsettling to watch, not just because of what they kept going through, but most of all due to the fact that they just… continued. Not only that, unless they continued to put themselves into that much danger, they would suffer a fate worse than death- becoming what they devoted their lives to destroying.
One day, something worse than anything Sayaka had ever seen emerged. It was a witch, but not any. This witch was not contained. There was no labyrinth- just reality itself. This witch managed to be powerful enough to completely break free from the confines of a labyrinth. It was more powerful than… anything Sayaka witnessed ever. For whatever reason, no matter how often this replayed for her, and how many times she saw this inevitable fate, she could never remember anything except one moment. One moment that entirely shaped everything about who she is now: Madoka leaving.
In her incapacitating state of horror, Sayaka sat there, in that exact position she’s relived thousands of times, holding Mami’s corpse in her arms. Madoka was the only one left who could stop the Walpurgisnacht from destroying reality as we know it. However, Sayaka knew she couldn’t take it on alone.
“Madoka… you… you can’t!” Sayaka pleaded, barely even able to get a comprehensible sentence out. She was shaking and sobbing so intensely she couldn’t breathe. It was hard to maintain her composure. One of her best friends was about to abandon her for a suicide mission, and the other’s corpse was in her arms. “Y-you can’t leave me, Madoka! You’ll die!” she begged through her undecipherable wails. Madoka looked at her with the same eyes she always had, but this time they were wracked with guilt. Despite however she really felt, as per usual, Madoka was still smiling reassuringly at her.
“I’m sorry, Sayaka. But I know why I became a magical girl. To save people, including you. Goodbye.” was all Sayaka understood in her panic before she watched as Madoka approached the Walpurgisnacht in the hopes of defeating it, even if it meant sacrificing her own life. Sayaka will never forget how she screamed until her lungs felt like they’d collapse, the way her throat felt like it was being shredded into billions of pieces, the way she sat there watching helplessly unable to do anything but shout, scream, sob, beg, and just witness her best friend hurtling herself toward the face of death. Every single time, no matter how often this moment played again in her mind, it still hurt. It was still agonizing watching Madoka die, no matter how repetitive it became.
Kyubey, the same incubator who granted Madoka and Mami’s wishes and deceived them into signing their lives and souls away, was there. It was always there. Waiting for an opportunity to take the soul of another girl impressionable enough to sign themselves away. Those girls were tricked. The difference between them and Sayaka is that they were naive and didn’t know just how deeply they were giving themselves away. Sayaka knew. The difference between them and Sayaka was that Sayaka was just stupid. So, so stupid.
Kyubey approached her with its usual thousand yard stare. Sayaka was a perfect target for it at this moment- young, vulnerable, traumatized, and completely alone. “You know Sayaka, you could have the power to change Madoka Kaname’s fate. As you witnessed, a single magical girl can’t take this on alone. However, you could use your wish to save her.”
It was a proposition that, despite every single bone in Sayaka’s body that screamed at her not to sign her soul away to this disgusting, manipulative creature, struck her deeply. She knew what she wanted, and she knew that thing could grant her wish. She knew how badly she wanted Madoka safe, and how deeply she wished she was still here and not bound to the horrors that came with being a magical girl. So Sayaka, despite now being acutely aware of all that came with being a magical girl, agreed.
Sayaka’s wish birthed something new that the fabric of reality itself could hardly contain- her ability to create and alter new timelines all within the confines of a singular universe. She wasn’t just persistent- she was desperate. Hundreds upon hundreds of timelines all led to the same inevitable ending. Everyone she knew and loved, including Madoka, died in front of her. Over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over again. Her meddling this severely with the concept of time, reality, and the universe itself were bound to cause issues. She never could have known that eventually the world as she knew it had the potential outcome of ceasing to exist, all because of her futile attempts at saving Madoka over and over. One day, however, she reset once again as per usual. But something was very wrong. Every single timeline she had lived through never had the inclusion of a specific person. But this time, this new mystery girl was in front of her introducing herself to the class. Who was she? And what triggered her sudden existence? This girl stuck out like a sore thumb because something was aching within Sayaka that convinced her that there was something horribly wrong within this timeline. Whatever it was, Sayaka would have to discover herself, and brace herself for whatever new horrors would be thrown at her this time.