Chapter Text
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It was finally time. The night of the full moon. Blitzø scaled the palace walls as he'd done many times before, but this time was different. This time, his heart was pounding in anticipation. Memories of hot breath and feather-light fingertips stroking his neck had haunted his mind for the past two weeks and he couldn't wait to mount the beast who had done this to him. If he were honest with himself, this excitement scared him. He knew what emotions usually accompanied such a feeling, but did what he did best and shoved those disturbing thoughts deep into the back of his mind. Right now he had a job to do.
He grinned and burst through the balcony doors, expecting the bright light of the full moon to land on a horny owl, ready and waiting for Blitzø to ravish him. Instead he saw Stolas fully clothed, sitting on his large plush couch and the look the prince gave him made his heart drop to his stomach. "Wha-...what's going on here?" he asked, trying and failing to hide the anxiety he now felt.
Stolas took a long, deep breath before gently patting the cushion beside him. "Have a seat, Blitzø. We need to talk."
That last sentence echoed in the imp's mind. 'No… No, no, no, not that,' was all he could think after hearing the worst combination of words in existence. That and the fact that Stolas had called him by anything other than that stupid pet name immediately set him on edge. He blinked before slowly making his way towards the prince, feet dragging as though they were made of lead. As he climbed up on the couch, a million and one nightmare scenarios played out in his mind, each one worse than the last. By the time he sat down, he was seconds away from a panic attack. Blitzø knew that if he spoke, he'd likely lose his shit, so he said nothing, instead staring nervously up at the prince. At least he didn't look mad. If anything, he seemed lost. For a split second, concern for the man replaced his fear, only for it to return as soon as Stolas opened his mouth.
"I wish to speak to you about something of great importance," he started slowly, as if the words he wanted to say were difficult to find. He paused for a moment, fists clenched in his lap. "I care for you, Blitzø," he managed to force out. "More than you know… And after reflecting on things, I’ve come to realize that I never should have forced this deal…forced myself onto you."
Blitzø's panic mounted. 'Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! He's gonna break things off! He's gonna take the book!' It surprised him which of these thoughts scared him more.
Stolas, seeing his dear imp's distress quickly continued on. "Don't worry. I have no intention of ruining your business."
Blitzø let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. "So…you're not taking the book back?" he asked hesitantly.
"I am," the prince replied, raising a hand to stop the protests Blitzø clearly wished to shout at him. "Please, allow me to explain." When it seemed he wouldn't be interrupted, Stolas continued. "After our first night together, I wanted so desperately to spend time with you again that I offered you that deal without realizing the implications. I placed you in an uncomfortable, unfair position, essentially holding your business hostage just so I could maintain contact with you. At the time, I thought you also wanted to see me and were simply being silly or coy, but…" His gaze dipped further down, along with his spirit. Even his feathers drooped. "But I see now you never wanted that… Never wanted me. I was deluding myself with such thoughts and because of that I ended up hurting you." The prince forced his gaze upward. "For my disrespect and lack of care, I apologize, Blitzø. I do truly see you as my equal, as my friend and I'm sorry for the trouble I've caused you. I meant what I said. I care for you deeply. And so…" Stolas reached for something in his pocket, his heart aching, but knowing this was the right thing to do. As steadily as he could, he held out his hands and the room was suddenly filled with a blinding light.
Blitzø shielded his eyes until they became accustomed to the brightness. It was then that he focused on its source. Cupped in the prince's slender hands was… His eyes widened. "Is that…?"
"An Asmodean crystal," the prince confirmed.
Blitzø felt his heart pounding in his ears. His eyes darted back and forth as he thought about what this would mean. With the crystal in his possession, he wouldn't need the book. He wouldn't need… His eyes snapped up to look at Stolas. The demon prince was looking back at him with a smile on his face that didn't reach his eyes.
"Stolas…" he breathed out, just above a whisper. He didn't know what to say.
"With this you can travel as you please, without the need for my Grimoire. I am also releasing you from our contract. You needn't visit me on the full moon anymore."
Blitzø had expected an, "unless you wish to," to be tacked onto the end of that sentence. His confusion must have shown on his face, because the next words out of the prince's mouth were…
"I know this is all you really wanted. Access to the living world. That's why you were here the day we first…" He looked away. "You're under no obligation to see me again," he insisted, voice strained as he held back tears. "The crystal is a gift. No strings attached."
Blitzø's pounding heart nearly stopped dead. Stolas, the guy who couldn't go a day without annoying him with calls and texts and who insisted on dropping in on him at the most inopportune times was telling him he was free. He didn't have to put up with his horny, privileged ass and pretend to play nice anymore. He could live his life owl-free. This was literally all he'd ever wanted being handed to him on a silver platter and yet instead of excitement, he felt his heart clench. Then the rest of what Stolas had said hit him and his blood ran cold. He looked up at the other demon, gaze both guilty and terrified. He expected the prince to be livid, but what he saw was much worse. The hurt Stolas felt showed clearly in all four of his eyes.
"Yes, I know it was all a trick," he confirmed and Blitzø cringed, tail lowered. "You used me to get the book and I gladly believed your lies. I ignored the obvious signs for months because I wanted…" The words got caught in his throat and the prince had to turn away again because if he didn't, he knew he'd break down. "...I wanted to believe you loved me, too."
Silence, cold and long, filled the room and though they were right next to each other, the space between them seemed vast.
And Blitzø fucking hated it.
A few minutes ago, he'd been excited; happy even. Now he felt like his life was unraveling quicker than yarn in a hellcat's claws. And the worst part? The all-consuming gut-wrenching guilt. Why did he feel guilty now, after months of tricking him? It had never bothered him before.
'Because, jackass, back then he didn't know you were tricking him,' his conscious whispered. 'You got away with it because he thought it was real.'
And with that, the weight of what he'd done came crashing down on Blitzø like a fucking tsunami. Stolas cared for him, for real and he'd used that to manipulate the man for his own selfish purposes without even a second thought.
'So fucking what?!,' the voice in his head that usually won out jumped to defend him. 'He did the exact same thing! Using you to get off and play out some lovesick fantasy! You shouldn't give a fuck about hurting him!'
Blitzø wanted to believe that. He wanted to feel pissed off at Stolas for what he'd done and yell at him for being a hypocrite, but the fact was…he wasn't. Stolas had made a mistake in a moment of passionate desperation. A mistake that had compounded, yes, but the man had reflected on what he'd done and apologized to Blitzø for his actions. Not only that, but he was actively trying to make up for it. Blitzø on the other hand had lied to, stolen from and used the gullible Goetia with little to no remorse and now he was facing the consequences. Still, being the stubborn ass that he was and feeling consumed by panic, he felt a strong desire to fight back. "What the fuck, Stolas? Two weeks ago everything felt normal… Why the fuck did you act like everything was okay if it wasn't?!"
'And you thought Stolas was a hypocrite,' another inner voice, one that sounded a lot like Fizzaroli, mocked. 'You did the exact same thing, Blitzo.'
"Yes…yes, you're right. I'm sorry," the other man quickly apologized. "I've never been good at handling my emotions," he admitted. "I thought that if I just pretended like things were okay, they would be." He sighed. "But that's not how feelings work... I can't just push them down and ignore them. I need to face them head on." He moved his cupped hands and the crystal towards Blitzø. "I only hope this can make amends for the trouble I've caused."
Another wave of panic rose in Blitzø's chest. This felt like a parting gift. This felt final. Why the fuck did that idea scare him so much? Not knowing what else to do, he reached out with shaking hands and took it. Almost instantly it began to change shape into… 'Wait, is that a horse keychain?' He stared at the object in confusion until a small chuckle drew his attention back to the prince who was smiling down at it fondly.
"Asmodean crystals take on a form that the user is most comfortable with. Usually that form is a piece of jewelry, but for you…" Stolas looked into his eyes and the warmth Blitzø saw there, floating in a sea of pain and longing, took his breath away. The prince quickly looked back at the keychain. "For you, this makes sense."
"Nothing makes sense right now," Blitzø admitted before he could stop himself.
The pair's eyes met once again and Stolas frowned. "I'm sorry," was all he could say to that. "But with this, at least your business can flourish and you and your family will be safe."
Blitzø's brows furrowed at that statement. He knew that what they'd been doing had been both dangerous and illegal, yet he'd never given much thought as to what could happen to him and the rest of I.M.P. if the wrong person found out. He felt an unpleasant shiver run down his spine and his heart clenched tighter. "Yeah…" was all he could muster up in response.
"I want you to be safe, Blitzø," Stolas insisted. "I want you to live a safe, successful and happy life, even if that means I'm not in it."
A life without Stolas. His dream come true. 'This feels more like a fucking nightmare.' Why? Why did he feel this way? The answer was obvious, but he was too much of a coward to face it. Instead he held his tongue, allowing the silence to drag on for far too long.
Thinking that perhaps the imp was looking for permission, Stolas said in a voice just above a whisper, "You may leave now."
Blitzø flinched as though the words had burned him. "Oh! ...Y-yeah, sure." He leapt down from the couch, awkwardly grabbed the Grimoire from out of his inner coat pocket and placed it on the small side table before making his way back to the balcony doors. Something inside of him was screaming at him to go back, to turn around and face this, but his fear won out as it always did. He would leave, like the fucking coward he was. Still, it didn't feel right just bailing... Slowly, he turned back around. "Are you sure about this, Stolas?" Though whether he was asking if the prince was sure about giving him the crystal or them breaking things off was unclear.
"Yes, I'm sure," the prince confirmed. He was heartbroken and exhausted, but sure of his decision. "I want to be a friend to you, Blitzø, not an obligation. You are free to do as you please."
Blitzø's heart ached at those words and his head spun in confusion. What he wouldn't give to go back to a time when he felt sure about where he stood with this man. A silly, horny, condescending prince he could handle, but the heartbroken vision he saw before him now? He had no idea how to handle this. So he did what he always did and turned his back on the problem. Before he leapt over the balcony ledge, Blitzø paused and said, "For what it's worth...I'm sorry."
"So am I," the prince replied. "...Goodbye, Blitzø."
The last thing Blitzø saw as he lowered himself down the wall were four glowing red eyes filled with tears. "Bye..." he choked out. With that final word, he escaped back into the night, desperately wondering if this would be the final time he'd see that lovely face and asking himself, with no small amount of anger, why the fuck he cared.
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