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Kim Dokja is not the type of person to understand romantic love completely. Sure, he has read a lot of webnovels about romance before, has rooted for characters and ships he finds along the way of reading. But in real life, he doesn’t really know how love works! They said that you are in love with a person if they make your heart wanna do a backflip.
But was it really supposed to make your heart flutter? What if you are just nervous when talking to people?
Yeah, Kim Dokja reasoned like that whenever he talks to Yoo Joonghyuk.
As someone who’s really popular for his otherworldly beauty (plus him being academically smart) he’s a fucking jackpot. And Kim Dokja is lucky to have him as his friend. Someone who’s almost forgotten by the community, him being this close with Yoo Joonghyuk is a luxury.
It has a few advantages too: 1) he gets free homework 2) he gets free tutoring if Yoo Joonghyuk decides to be stingy and refuses to let him copy his homework and 3) he gets free lunch!
Those were the main reasons why Kim Dokja was still sticking with him despite his grumpy attitude (just kidding, it’s not like that. Yoo Joonghyuk is his DEAREST companion)
But these days… Kim Dokja has been feeling strange. There’s a strange feeling at the pit of his stomach whenever Yoo Joonghyuk’s near with him. His heart flutters whenever he’s met with Yoo Joonghyuk’s onyx, godly eyes that can turn in a slight shade of gold when sunlight hits them. And oh lord don’t even get him started with his voice. His voice! Lately, it’s making Kim Dokja feel something.
Kim Dokja was in the classroom, patiently waiting for their teacher to come. Yoo Joonghyuk is still not here as the seat beside him is still empty. He had his earphones on and an open textbook on his table. It’s weird. Yoo Joonghyuk is always thirty minutes early for first period classes. Right now, only five minutes left and the bell will ring. Perhaps he’s absent?
Kim Dokja felt the need to pout.
Wait what?
Why is he gonna feel sulky if Yoo Joonghyuk won’t be around? If he is really absent today, then it’s no problem. It’s not like he can’t live without seeing that Greek god built face of his–
The classroom door slides open, revealing Yoo Joonghyuk in slightly messy hair. He looked so damn good, not like he doesn’t look good every day, today is just a whole different vibe. This style of hair is rare, as the right side of his bangs are not swept back up as usual. So all of his bangs are down, creating that freshly debuted Kpop member in an idol group air around him.
Oh. My. God.
Kim Dokja was stunned by this change of style. The music from his earphones surrounded him as the lyrics went:
I lost my mind, the moment I saw you
Except you, everything get in slow motion
Tell me, if this is love
Ah. What is love by Exo is playing huh. How fitting.
Yoo Joonghyuk walked towards his direction, pulling the vacant chair out and sitting on it, just beside a reddened Kim Dokja.
He even feels hot in this cold season. Goodness, is he sick?!
The other boy noticed him staring, raising an eyebrow in his direction. “What?”
Kim Dokja did not answer immediately, still finding the words to form.
Damn, he’s got a lot of words to say! Like why are you almost late? What’s with the change of your hair style?! Are you debuting as a Kpop idol tomorrow–
“Your hair” Is all what he allowed his mouth to say
Yoo Joonghyuk looked confused for a moment before running a hand through his hair. His hair bangs not staying upwards like it usually does. “Oh. My hair got softer it seems”
Kim Dokja wanted to laugh, he was probably out of hair gel but this style really looks good on him that it’s enough to shut him up. It made him look more like a highschooler. Yeah, like the main character’s love interest in those shojo manga Kim Dokja had read…
“Well? What are you still staring at?” Yoo Joonghyuk questioned, a slight frown on his face. Kim Dokja was still entranced by his appearance. His heart, beating loudly against his chest.
When Yoo Joonghyuk concludes that he’s probably not hearing him because of the earphones stuck in his ears, he yanks it off. Poor Kim Dokja was startled by this sudden act.
“Hey! You’re gonna break it–!” Yoo Joonghyuk casually puts the other earphone in his left ear.
“Just what are you listening to…” He said, but Kim Dokja does not want him to know that he listens to kpop boy groups!
So he immediately switched the song before Yoo Joonghyuk had a chance to listen to it properly.
Yeah, that should do it–
Ring Ding Dong by SHINee has started playing.
Fuck, that’s even worse!
Yoo Joonghyuk stared at him as if to.. judge his music taste.
“You listen to that..?”
“Alrighttt let me have that back” Kim Dokja took the earphones back. He does not need Yoo Joonghyuk to judge him. Still with a slightly red face, Kim Dokja returned his attention towards his textbook. Yoo Joonghyuk did not miss the way those cheeks were sprinkled with a soft blush but decided not to comment on it.
Days passed into a week, and Yoo Joonghyuk still hasn't bothered to change that hair style, much to Kim Dokja’s annoyance.
What was he upset for? Kim Dokja himself doesn’t know either. He just thinks Yoo Joonghyuk looked soft..? Unlike his usual style, he’s more intimidating in it; and it makes it easier for him to hide this strange feeling he has for a while.
But right now? He just couldn’t smooth talk his way out of this. Heck, he couldn’t even look at Yoo Joonghyuk’s eyes for too long anymore without stuttering occasionally!
Kim Dokja doesn’t know whether to curse or praise the deity responsible for carving this out-of-the-world handsome face.
Just what’s going on with me lately?
Kim Dokja has already let himself immerse in the webnovel he’s reading as he and Yoo Joonghyuk stand inside the subway train. All seats were taken so they had to stand beside each other, closely– to be specific, since the train is so cramped. Kim Dokja being the one in front of him and Yoo Joonghyuk being the one near the door. Kim Dokja’s body is slightly pressing onto Yoo Joonghyuk’s as people try to get enough space for themselves. It becomes slightly uncomfortable as Kim Dokja is practically getting squished. With the occasional bumping of bodies towards him, Kim Dokja felt his patience running thin. His precious reading time is being interrupted because of these damn people. When someone suddenly bumps into him way too hard that his phone almost slip out of his grasp, he thought that he’s about to go insane.
Yoo Joonghyuk, on the other hand, noticed the obvious display of discomfort on Kim Dokja’s expression. So he does what a friend should do.
With a swift motion, Yoo Joonghyuk switches their position. Now he’s got Kim Dokja pinned on the train door. He is facing Kim Dokja and his back against the crowd as if it’s acting as a protective wall around him. Kim Dokja, who is slowly processing what just happened, turned red.
“What’s the meaning of this..?” He asked, a little dumbfounded as he felt a rush of heat throughout his cheeks.
“Shut up and stay still” Was all Yoo Joonghyuk said.
Yeah sure, Kim Dokja can stay still but his heart sure cannot!
Physically, Kim Dokja feels comfortable as he has a wider space to relax his standing position. Mentally? He is not so sure.
Yoo Joonghyuk’s face is facing him closely! And with his hair down still! Is Kim Dokja really down bad for this type of looks? He could feel his heart pounding inside his chest. If this keeps up he feels like it’s going to burst. Just what is this feeling??
When he felt the weight of a gaze on him, he reluctantly looked up and saw Yoo Joonghyuk already staring at him.
“W-What?” In an attempt to make things less awkward, he asked.
“You look smaller than I thought” Is what Yoo Joonghyuk decided to say.
“What? Are you trying to pick a fight??”
“I’m only telling the truth”
Kim Dokja huffed and decided to look away, his cheeks felt hot and he keeps repeating to himself that it’s just the heat. No way this is love. What is love anyway? Yoo Joonghyuk only did this as a friend, yeah! As a friend! Nothing special.
From that day onwards, Kim Dokja tried to sort his thoughts out (intentionally avoiding Yoo Joonghyuk in the process).
Kim Dokja did try to avoid him for now, thinking that maybe interacting with him less will wash these strange feelings off the shore. If he really is in love with his friend, then oh damn that'd be trouble. He doesn’t really want to ruin the current relationship he has with the boy, afraid that he’ll ruin their friendship and the comfortable atmosphere between them. He doesn’t want to risk it by making things awkwards just because he let his feelings be known. So he was avoiding him, not completely avoiding him but he’s appearing less and less by Joonghyuk’s side. Yoo Joonghyuk did not seem to mind though.
Yoo Joonghyuk did not seem to mind though.
“Kim Dokja” A familiar voice called him and Kim Dokja practically melted at the sound of his name being uttered by that boy.
Ah shit.
“Oh, Joonghyuk-ah! Is there something you need?” Kim Dokja asks, followed by a nervous laugh.
“Quit acting dumb,” Yoo Joonghyuk said, his voice is a little firm this time. “Are you trying to skip your cleaning duty?”
Yes. “Uhh, no. Sorry, I forgot”
“It’s us two, go and help me get this over with,” Yoo Joonghyuk said with a slight grumble as Kim Dokja tries to weasel his way out of the situation.
“I’m not feeling quite well so I have to go home early. I know we are the ones assigned today but ask somebody else for now” Kim Dokja said quickly before trying to rush towards the door. The lie flowed naturally out of his cunning mouth but to Yoo Joongyuk who knows him too well, doesn’t let him get out. Kim Dokja was startled when the door suddenly slammed shut in front of him.
“Are you really?” His voice was a little stern and oh goodness, Kim Dokja is having these weird feelings again! It made his knees physically weak.
“I’m telling the truth!” He said, almost too quickly, that it made him even more suspicious in the other boy’s eyes. He suddenly felt a warm hand at the back of his neck and Kim Dokja was confused for a second. Yoo Joonghyuk’s head, leaning close to him.
What whatwhatwhatwhatwhat—
But the next thing that happened really spiraled Kim Dokja’s heart and mind into space.
Yoo fucking Joonghyuk leaned closer and pressed his forehead against his.
Kim Dokja’s physical response was to headbutt him, really hard.
The two idiots yelped in pain afterwards, as expected.
“W-What was that?!?” Kim Dokja asked (exclaimed) his face, red as a tomato once again. He has his left hand on his forehead and his right hand over his pounding heart.
“I should be the one asking that,” Yoo Joonghyuk said with slightly gritted teeth as he massaged the sore area where Kim Dokja had headbutted him. “You fool, I was just trying to check your temperature”
“You could have just used your palm! Who uses that method these days anyway?” Kim Dokja tried to calm his racing heart. Seriously, Yoo Joonghyuk and his damning looks! If only he knew the effect he has on him.
“Besides, I thought you were going to ki..” Kim Dokja’s voice trails off before he could utter the next word out of his mouth. He immediately shut up, an embarrassed sound caught up in his throat. Yoo Joonghyuk caught on pretty quickly on this, much to his demise.
“You thought I was going to what?” Yoo Joonghyuk asked with a raised eyebrow, his usually stoic expression is blended with slight amusement.
“Nothing” Kim Dokja says quickly before opening the door, only for Yoo Joonghyuk to close them again and lock it.
“Hey! I wasn’t kidding about not feeling well you know?” Yoo Joonghyuk doesn’t really look convinced in the slightest.
“Kim Dokja” Again, with that stern voice, Yoo Joonghyuk scrutinized him as if he was some lab rat. Kim Dokja suddenly felt small under the weight of his gaze.
“Why are you avoiding me recently?” Yoo Joonghyuk asked, demanding an answer. Kim Dokja averts his attention towards the blackboard. He doesn’t answer.
“Kim Dokja, look at me” He grabbed Kim Dokja’s chin to force him to look at his eyes. Kim Dokja’s starry eyes look into his darker ones. His pupils are dilated, gazing softly at him.
“I’m not avoiding you” Yoo Joonghyuk barely holds a huff.
“Talk or I’m not opening this door”
Kim Dokja groaned as he decided to hide his face with his hands. “Fine”
Yoo Joonghyuk stood there with his arms crossed, waiting for his answer.
“I’ve been having weird feelings when I'm around you.. It’s getting quite annoying and embarrassing at the same time. It was okay at first, I could still brush it off but when you entered the room with that change of hair style and I…” Kim Dokja stopped to muster all the courage to say the next lines.
“–Ithinkitmademefallinlovewithyouevenmore”
It was so fast that Kim Dokja’s sure Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t get it, yet he didn’t bother to repeat the words despite the confused look on the other boy’s face.
“What?”
“You heard it!”
“I didn’t understand a single thing”
“But you heard what I said prior to it right? It should have given you an idea!” Kim Dokja couldn’t look up, Yoo Joonghyuk must think he’s more than a fool now. The cat is out of the bag, he finally said what he truly feels and he’s just anticipating the rejection.
Yeah, it’s better if Yoo Joonghyuk just reject him right here and there to end this embarrassing moment.
But no, Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t do that.
“Not really. Can you repeat that again?” Kim Dokja can hear the tone of amusement within the bastard’s voice. He doesn’t need to look up to see the smug look on his face.
“You–! Quit acting like you didn’t understand it!” Kim Dokja looked up. The audacity of this sunfish to act confused earlier when he actually heard it just fine.
“I just need to confirm it” Kim Dokja wants to hide under the ground, this bastard sure is persistent!
“Confirm what? You’re just gonna make fun of me aren’t you?” Kim Dokja grumbled, eventually giving in. “I said I like you, and I fell in love even more because of your… sudden change of hair style”
He said slowly, and with a heavy breath. His head hung low. Okay this is it. He is anticipating the rejection now.
“It worked…” Yoo Joonghyuk said, a bit puzzled. Kim Dokja looked up with a raised eyebrow.
“What worked?”
What was this sunfish bastard saying all of a sudden?
Kim Dokja got the feeling that someone was fucking with him right now.
“Hey, say something–”
He didn’t get to finish his words when soft lips crashed into his. The warm hand was there again, at the back of his neck. Kim Dokja’s poor heart was racing like a madman. It took all of his self-control to prevent gripping on Yoo Joonghyuk’s arms for life support. The hand from his neck moved to his cheek, gently caressing them with the use of his thumb. Although this moment was the moment he was most startled in, Kim Dokja didn’t have the heart to headbutt him again.
When Kim Dokja pulled away, he was out of breath.
“Does this mean my feelings are reciprocated?” Kim Dokja asked, he couldn’t stop himself from smiling.
Yoo Joonghyuk only kissed him again as a response.
Bonus
“Oi, Yoo Joonghyuk” Han Sooyoung called, interrupting the boy from answering his math assignment due the next day. Yoo Joonghyuk scowled.
“What?”
“Why don’t you try changing the way your hair looks? You always had that one side swept back!”
“So?”
“You would look like a kpop idol in those newly debuted boy groups”
“Your point?”
Han Sooyoung grins. “Kim Dokja likes those types, you know”
Yoo Joonghyuk just frowned. “What are you planning?”
“Idiot, quit looking at me with that face. I was trying to help you! I am so tired of seeing you two pine against each other” Han Sooyoung reasoned. How could Yoo Joonghyuk think she’s helping him when she had that shit-eating grin on her face? Anyone who knows that scream trouble.
“There’s nothing to lose. Come on, just show up one day with your hair looking like that and see the results. That squid will eventually realize his feelings for you” Han Sooyoung wiggled her eyebrows, her grin even wider.
“Fine” If somehow, it didn’t work, Yoo Joonghyuk will just bury her six feet underground.