Chapter Text
I had always craved more. What silent, anxious bookworm didn't have her head in the clouds? When Jasper Hale came into the picture, he clouded my thoughts even more. I even began to imagine something else with him but refused to demand it or even speak it past my thoughts. Of course, he had always found a way out of the limelight even though he belonged to the Cullen/Hale siblings.
It seemed that Forks high school went even more crazy when they arrived, especially when it seemed only two were taken. Emmett and Rosalie were a couple of lovebirds and people judged them because they were foster siblings. It never bothered me, destiny is destiny. Whether it be his majestical siblings or the ring of the hourly bell, Jasper always managed to slip away and it left me watching him exit in a graceful way.
His pale skin and yellow curly hair seemed to call to me. I am sure all of Forks thought the same of every Cullen sibling even if Jessica Loud-Mouth Stanley is the only one that passive-aggressively will admit it. Then Bella arrived in March and the rumor mill was up and running again. Mike and Eric were quick to befriend her and then it seemed everyone else followed in suit. Angela introduced Bella to me and she seemed to be just as uncomfortable by school as me.
Though, observing Jasper was a time consuming job and I often became lost in my own mind. I accepted that it was all a fantasy and kept my head down around the foster siblings, never letting myself get close enough to them to bother them. Today, I thought of his long legs hiding in his jeans, his strong arms that were often beneath sweater sleeves, a chest of a god that was covered by endless designers. The kisses I would leave all over his -
"Ma'am? The bell?" I looked up to that husky voice that interrupted my mind, the man of my literal daydreams standing at the edge of my desk. Eyes blinking, I avoided eye contact as I caught myself looking around the now half-empty classroom. I began to pick up the history book and notes on my desk as he spoke again, "I apologize for interrupting your thoughts, I just wanted you to know." His eyebrows were furrowed when I finally looked up at him and my breath caught in my throat.
He looked as beautiful as I always observed, "Oh-uh, thank you. That, that was very kind-kind of you." Jasper Hale has been sitting in front of me and seemed kind. Well, he seemed kind to everyone he would spare a glance to, which was not many. Usually just his siblings or teachers.
He nodded, "Yes, well, I'll see you in the cafeteria." I smiled at him and gave a small nod, indicating that I would see him. Then, for the very first time I would never forget, he smiled back. Jasper began to turn around when he stopped and turned to back to me again, "It's Connie, right? Your name, I mean." Again, I could only nod at him and he smiled - number two, as I was definitely counting. He turned around for a second time and then walked out of the class, away from me. I let out a shaky breath and took a sip from my water bottle.
My throat felt very hot suddenly, as if Jasper Hale had pulled all of the coolness out of the room. God, he was beautiful and his voice is like honey. The last teen left the room and I continued to put my stuff in my bag, which was a tan single shoulder cross bag. I shook my arms up and stood. The walk to my locker felt longer than normal, probably because I was stuck in my own daydream of Jasper Hale's smile. I hadn't seen him really smile. He was always graceful and stiff. Suddenly, I bumped into a person and tripped over their feet. I landed on my ass and my bag skidded against the lockers to my left. Pencils and pens fell out of my bag and I sighed.
"I am so sorry, I was not looking!" I was quick to apologize as I started to pick up the pencils and pens that had come out of my bag. A hand shot down and helped me grab them. I finally looked up to see Edward Cullen squatting down as he grabbed my bag. "No, it's alright. My fault," He responded, handing me the bag. I quickly stood up and Edward followed, much more graceful then me. He handed the last of my pencils and I shook my head, "No, it was mine. I tend to get lost in my own head. Daydreaming and all."
Edward smiled, "I do that, too." I nodded, avoiding eye contact. "Well, I'll see you at lunch..?" Edward trailed off. "Connie." He nodded, "I'll see you at lunch, Connie. I'm Edward." A million responses in my head and I went with what seemed the most casual, "It was nice to meet you, Edward." He tipped his head and began to walk away. To say I was shocked is less dramatic, as I had gone a year without speaking to any of the Cullen siblings and now I had spoken to two.
I finished the walk to my locker and put my history, physics, creative writing, and english textbooks away. I then grabbed my theater script for Eurydice, violin, and advanced calculus books. I had a double block of theater after lunch and it made me take a deep breath. I loved theater, but not the stage. I started to feel the tears in my eyes and began to overthink about the class when I still had a forty-five minute lunch before then. I grabbed my anti-anxiety meds out of my bag and swallowed one with water.
This often happened when I thought about theater. The anxiety had me choking on my words and checking my watch as the minutes passed by. I settled myself down and shoved the books in my bag, carefully trying to not tear the pages. I walked to the cafeteria, making sure my mind stayed clear, and took a deep breath before I pushed open the doors. I hoped that there was still a seat for me at the normal lunch table. I saw that everyone was there and Angela had pulled up a chair for me.