Archive of Our Own

Their first interaction

It had happened only a few months after he’d first encountered Sleep in his dreams. No longer bearing to stay in his apartment, he’d found himself in an old abandoned mansion somewhere in the countryside, bordering on the edge of an impressive forest. The place was a complete mess, he’d spent the first few weeks simply cleaning up the important rooms and turning the ruins into somewhat of a suitable space to live in. 

Water and electricity were running by some miracle and windows were still intact, most likely the work of Sleep, but the wallpapers were peeling off the walls, the furniture decrepit and coated in thick layers of dust. The only room he really felt comfortable in was the living room, having spent the most time on tidying it up and adorning it with a bookshelf, a small TV, a coffee table and a cozy little sofa. 

And that’s where he’d found himself on that rainy afternoon, curled up on the sofa, suddenly ripped out of his thoughts by a quiet knock on the door. He paused, his face contorting in confusion. He couldn’t think of anyone who would possibly know where he was, let alone care enough to come looking for him. He hadn’t really spoken to anyone in weeks. Sitting up slowly, already beginning to convince himself his ears had played a trick on him, another much louder knock made him wince and jump up off the sofa. He quickly made his way out of the room towards the front door, pausing in front of it. 

“Who is it”, he asked, unsteady voice immediately giving away his nervousness. No answer came, so he unlocked and opened the heavy door cautiously. The sight he was met with was just about the last thing he’d expected, making him tilt his head in even more confusion. A short man stood in front of him, looking up at him with a mix of curiousity and apprehension on his face. He looked to be roughly the same age as Vessel. His rain soaked clothes clung to his body and he shivered, opening his mouth as if to speak, then closing it again. Neither of them knew what to do, staring at each other awkwardly for several moments. 

“Can I help you?” Vessel decided to ask, hoping the other man would just shake his head and disappear again. He was not so lucky.

“I… think so. I’m- I was told-“ he stuttered, unsure of how to explain himself properly. Vessel felt it then, an aura of familiarity settling around the shorter man. Not as if he had seen him somewhere before, but as if he knew him, had always known him. A strange sensation washed over him. Before he could ask more questions however, he was interrupted.

“She said I would find answers here. That I was one of hers now.”

He sucked in a sharp breath, eyes widening in realization. The man’s skin had the same sickly pale, almost grey tone that his had taken on after his first encounter. Sleep had told him that there would be others who would come to join him, that despite being her chosen one he couldn’t spread the word all on his own. He took a quick step forwards, making the other man take a panicked step backwards. Vessel raised his hands, stopping in his tracks as to not startle him even more. 

“Why don’t you come inside so you can tell me what exactly is happening. I doubt I’m any wiser than you, but you look like you could use a fresh pair of clothes and something to warm you up, unless you’d prefer to have this conversation out here.”

The man thought about it for a moment while the rain continued pouring down around them. He looked down at his soaked clothes, then back up at Vessel with hesitation. After a few more seconds he gave one quick nod, stepping past the taller man into the warm house. 

Vessel closed the door behind him and stood still once more, trying to figure out his next move when the man spoke up from behind him. 

“That’s a… nice house you have here”

The awkward tension melted away ever so slightly at these words, eliciting a huffed out chuckle from Vessel. “Thanks I just moved in” he replied, causing the other man to grin faintly. He caught a hint of fangs that looked much like his own.

“It would probably be for the best if you took a quick shower while I grab you clothes and something to drink”, he continued, motioning for the man to follow him as he started making his way towards the stairs with slow steps.

“You’re just gonna get a cold otherwise”.

“That wouldn’t really be ideal” the man mumbled. He hesitated though, taken aback by how easy Vessel made it sound. As if he wasn’t a stranger who showed up on his doorstep not even 5 whole minutes ago, and instead something like a new roommate he had been expecting.

“Are you sure? You can just tell me what’s happening and I’ll be on my way again”

Vessel sighed. “It’s not that easy” he muttered. “I doubt you can just go back”

Before the other man could ask what exactly he meant by that, he started making his way up the stairs, leaving him with no choice but to follow him. The man still cautiously scanned everything with his eyes as he walked behind Vessel. The eerie looking house did nothing to calm his nerves, it looked like no one had lived here in a hundred years. The wood of the stairs was cracked in places and creaked horribly with each step they took. The upstairs corridor walls were mostly empty, save for an old looking portrait of a grim woman in a formal dark green dress. He wondered if she’d been the previous owner of the strange mansion. Before he could open his mouth to ask any questions however, Vessel stopped abruptly in front of one of the doors, the shorter man nearly bumping into his back. 

“Ah.. sorry” he spoke, then pointed at the door. “Bathroom. You can shower if you want, or just get yourself dried off. There should be fresh clothes laying around somewhere in there too. I’ll just… wait downstairs. Take your time”

With that he turned around, sluggishly walking back down the corridor towards the stairs, leaving the other man standing in front of the door. He sighed. Apparently the strange tall man wasn’t the most welcoming person. Not knowing what else he was supposed to do, he opened the bathroom door and stepped inside.

—————————

They’d decided to give him the name II, since he no longer remembered his old one. It had been the first thing to slip from his mind, followed by his age and where he lived. He understood what Vessel had meant now, when he’d told him it wouldn’t be that easy for him to simply leave the mansion again. Since he was entangled with both Sleep and Vessel now, and no longer knew where else to go, he’d reluctantly decided to move into the creepy old house. 

It wasn’t unbearable. He had a room all to himself, the place was big enough that he would’ve managed to mostly avoid the strange other man. The problem was that he couldn’t. Couldn’t bring himself to avoid him, to stay out of his way, to completely ignore him the way he’d originally planned to, once he’d realized Vessel obviously wanted nothing to do with him either. He felt drawn to him in such a completely utterly confusing way, always finding himself ending up in the same room as the other man, even if most of the time they didn’t say a word to each other. 

Perhaps it was simply because he wasn’t used to being all alone every day. At least that’s what he told himself whenever he contemplated just why it brought him so much comfort to be near Vessel. 

They’d had a long conversation on the day he arrived at the mansion, Vessel telling him everything he himself knew about Sleep, how he’d encountered her and what she expected of them. II’s story was nearly identical, the only difference being that she never showed herself to him in his dreams and instead visited him in the form of sleep paralysis. 

Both of the men were new to all of this, unsure of how to act, what to do, what to avoid. They spent the majority of their days writing music, or at least trying to. II had noticed quickly from the words the other man wrote on scrunched up papers that he was going through something, dealing with things he wouldn’t talk about or even acknowledge. 

II couldn’t blame him for not opening up to a stranger who suddenly moved into his house, but the words made his heart twist in his chest every time he read them, wishing he knew what caused all this agony and if he could somehow relieve the man of some of it. He felt it sometimes, glimpses of the pain that he knew wasn’t his own. They were unbearable for him, leaving him curled up in his room, crying himself to sleep. 

He did not want to imagine just how Vessel felt, if those glimpses were only fragments of his feelings.

____________________

Vessel’s eyes (body horror)

The eyes had started growing mere days after the first time he’d encountered Sleep in one of his dreams. 

He had no idea what they were when they first started forming because they simply looked like thin, pale markings, almost like old scars. Sleep had already given him markings on his limbs so he assumed the ones on his face would be more of the same. 

He’d gone about his days the way he usually did, almost forgetting he even had the scars until a few days later, he realized they’d gotten bigger. Not overly so, but enough to be noticeable. They were still under his skin, now taking on a soft greyish tone and running along the underside of his eyes. It wasn’t until another week later that he started feeling uneasy, when the soft lines had started raising from his skin like fresh scars. He’d talked to Sleep that night, carefully asking her what the strange markings were supposed to be. 

“ A gift ” she’d said, not explaining anything further. He’d thanked her, convincing himself she wouldn’t do anything to harm him, that the scars were a blessing not a punishment. 

Two more weeks had passed of him writing his songs, cleaning the seemingly never ending rooms in the old house, ignoring the way the marks turned darker and darker every single day. When he’d started covering them up as to not frighten his new friend, they’d already been close to black. But it wasn’t until a few days later that it finally happened.

He was ripped from his sleep in the middle of the night. It didn’t take him long to realize what had woken him, the sharp pain in his face making him suck in a sharp breath as he jumped from his bed before even being fully awake. He was drenched in sweat, his eyes oddly blurry, panic coursing through his entire body with such an intensity it nearly punched the breath out of his lungs. He stumbled out of his bedroom with quick steps, holding a hand to his face as he pushed the bathroom door open and hastily turned the lights on. 

When he came to a halt in front of the sink and looked up at himself in the mirror, the first thing he noticed was the sticky black liquid smeared all over his cheeks and the hand still on his face. He removed the hand, staring down on it with confusion, trying to figure out when he had touched anything that could’ve covered his hands in the strange tar-like substance. 

It was only when he glanced back at his own face that he understood it wasn’t his his hands that made the mess, it was his scars. The liquid oozed out from under the bandages slowly, running down his face like tears. He ripped them off frantically, crying out in pain and cursing at himself for not being more careful. 

His heart dropped when he realized the scars were no longer closed, the thick black lines looking as if they had been cut open somehow, steadily spilling black liquid like blood, dripping all over the sink.  They hurt like open wounds too, stinging pain almost making his entire face feel numb with the intensity of it. He blindly reached for a towel next to him, held it under cold water before trying to carefully wipe some of the liquid away from his cheeks, away from the scars, hoping to get a better look at them and figure out what exactly to do. 

It took him several minutes to gently wipe around his marks, hissing and twitching in pain every time he got too close to them. Tears had started spilling from his eyes without him even noticing them, too focused on taking deep breaths and not letting himself give in to the nausea pooling in his stomach. His eyesight had gotten more and more blurry the more liquid he removed from his face.

He threw the towel to the ground with trembling hands when it was completely covered in black blood and the wounds were still oozing more of it. He got close enough to the mirror that his face was mere inches away from it, staring at the marks frantically with eyes ripped wide open. His breath hitched. It looked like there was something white inside of his opened scars.

A panicked scream ripped from his throat when he saw the white moving. He removed his hand from the side of the sink and raised his fingers to the scar under his left eye, pulling at the edges of it, more pain shooting across his face like lightning. 

The realization hit him then. They weren’t scars, new strange marks, anything even remotely close to that.

They were eyes.

____________________

II’s transformation (light body horror)

II had just gotten out of the shower, the first time he saw it.

He put his clothes on, dried his hair off with a towel. Moved over to the mirror to glance at himself. His skin had turned more and more sickly pale, almost taking on a grey tone, in the few weeks since he’d arrived at the house. His hair was starting to change color, black roots growing out steadily, sure to replace his auburn hair bit by bit. He sighed. Leaned in closer to look at his eyes. They’d started changing only a few days ago, looked as if they were turning dark blue. He’d known he would change, of course, it was one of the first things Vessel had warned him about. Still it was unsettling to watch his own face grow less and less familiar to him with each passing day. 

It was when he raised an arm to touch his face that he saw it, freezing in his tracks. A strange black line on his shoulder, poking out from under his shirt. It was thin, snaking across his skin like lightning. He tilted his head in confusion, then pulled the sleeve up. The line went further up his shoulder towards his back. He tried scratching at it, seeing if he could remove it by rubbing over the deep black tracks. His heart dropped at the realization that it wasn’t on his skin but beneath it, easily looking like a tattoo to someone who didn’t know any better. He carefully brushed a fingertip over his shoulder. His stomach churned when he felt the line was warm. More than warm. It was burning hot to the touch, the way skin felt during a high fever. Panic started bubbling up in his chest, quickly spreading throughout his entire body.

He ripped his shirt off and threw it to the side, frantically twisting his body to follow the length of the line as far as it would go. A gasp spilled from his mouth when his eyes fell on the dark patches of skin all over his back, from his shoulders down to his hips. They looked spidery, veiny, black spots with the snaking lines protruding from them and making their way all across his skin, some of them reaching up the nape of his neck, others wrapping around the edges of his ribcage. He dug his fingertips into his back, recoiling violently when he realized the bigger patches of black were hard to the touch and hot enough to make him yelp in pain.

He knew that it was just another step in his transformation, that it was Sleep’s work and therefore couldn’t possibly be harmful. But the longer he stared at the creases in his skin, the more lightheaded he felt. They looked disgusting, nausea pooling in his stomach at the way they felt when he pressed a hand against them again. They hadn’t been there when he went to sleep last night, just appearing on his body in a matter of hours unlike every other transformation he’d undergone so far. If they’d started growing slowly, taking weeks to form just like his fangs, he would’ve had the time to adjust and get used to them, to tell himself that he didn’t mind them and to accept his fate. It was the foolishness of thinking he could predict Sleep that now caught up to him, making him spiral into a panic far too strong to handle. 

He didn’t realize that he’d started to hyperventilate until his knees almost gave out. His hands flew to the sides of the sink, gripping the porcelain so hard his knuckles turned white as he tried to keep himself upright. His breathing techniques failed him, the prospect of staring at the lines for even another second making him feel like he was going to lose his mind. He frantically turned around, letting his eyes dart across the room to search for the shirt he’d ripped off and thrown away, the sudden movement violent enough to make him lose his balance.

——————————

It was the loud thud from upstairs that ripped Vessel’s attention away from the plate in his hand. He’d been washing the dishes when he heard it, tilting his head in confusion and looking up. The walls in the old mansion were incredibly thin, any noise made upstairs could be heard downstairs if the house was quiet enough. The noise had come from one of the bathrooms above the kitchen, and II had mentioned something about taking a quick shower after breakfast. But it sounded too loud for him to just have dropped something, or simply knocked something over. 

Vessel contemplated just yelling to ask if he was alright, but the thought of standing around for minutes just yelling and waiting for an answer made him feel silly. And so he sighed and put the plate in the sink, drying his hands off and walking out of the kitchen. He scoffed at the uneasy feeling creeping up in his chest as he made his way up the stairs. 

He was overthinking, there were many things in the heavily decorated bathroom that could be knocked over, that even he had ran into on many occasions. He cursed himself for always jumping to the worst conclusion and allowing anxiety to take over him. This time however, the uncomfortable feeling in his gut was right. 

He knocked on the bathroom door, waiting a few seconds before reaching for the handle 

“Are you alright? I thought I heard something-“

The rest of the sentence got stuck in his throat when he entered the room. It took him several seconds to even find II, curled up in the corner of the room next to the sink, holding his head in a tight grip with both hands and trembling. His chest was heaving, trying to catch breaths that just wouldn’t reach his lungs. Vessel was hit with a wave of nervousness at the mere sight of him. 

He’d seen panic attacks before, had experienced a few of his own too, but never seen one on II. He stood there frozen in place for a few seconds, contemplating what to do next. He took slow steps towards the other man, leaning down in front of him carefully. II’s head snapped up, eyes ripped wide open and frightened, almost making Vessel yelp and stumble backwards. He caught himself last second and took a deep breath.

“What happened, what can I do?”

He reached a hand out to touch the man’s shoulder. II jerked back violently.

“Do not” he hissed, voice filled with fear rather than anger. Vessel quickly pulled his hands back, giving him an apologetic look. 

“You’re right, I’m sorry. I won’t. But what do you need, I can’t help you if I don’t know”

He frantically tried to remember what usually helped him when he was in such a state, mind going blank in his frenzy. II’s desperate heaving brought it back to him, at least one thing he could do. He steadied his voice to try and mask his own fear while sitting down in front of him.

“Do me a favor and focus on me, alright? Nothing else, just look at me”

He locked eyes with the other man. It was hard to keep a relaxed face while staring into the panicked eyes full of unshed tears, but he knew if he let his own compose slip away he would only make things worse for II. So he offered him a gentle smile, trying to figure out just what had made him so upset in the first place. He couldn’t see anything knocked over from the corners of his eyes, neither did the man seem injured in any way, but this wasn’t a normal panic attack. He looked deeply shaken by something. Vessel held his gaze for a few more minutes before he was sure II was really focused on him and wouldn’t let his eyes slip away. Then he spoke again, quietly.

“Can you try to take just one deep breath for me?”

II shook his head frantically, gasping for air as if to prove his point.

“Do it with me then. It’s alright if it doesn’t work, just try the best you can”

He started taking deep, long breaths, then exhaling them slowly. The breaths were overexaggerated, an attempt to encourage II to copy them. It took him a few minutes but he started trying, forcing shallow breaths into his lungs and holding them for several seconds before releasing them again. He squeezed his eyes shut, the effort of inhaling deeply enough for the air to reach his lungs making him even more lightheaded than he’d already been before. But the longer he tried, the easier it became. Vessel gave him a faint smile when he opened his eyes back up.

“That’s good, keep going exactly like that”

He watched as the other man’s frenzied gasps gradually evened out into unsteady breaths. He was still trembling, though much less noticeably, not the same as the full body convulsions that had shook him just minutes ago. Vessel shifted into a more comfortable position before speaking reluctantly, not wanting to unsettle the man again now that he’d just managed to calm down some, but also wanting to figure out what had happened.

“You don’t have to speak right now, but will you tell me later what got you like this?”

II opened his mouth, taking another shaky breath before choking out some words and weakly twisting his body to the best of his ability.

“On my back”

Vessel hesitated for a second, remembering how the man had reacted to his attempt to touch him earlier.

“Can I…” he asked while reaching out a hand once more, slowly enough that II could refuse him if he wanted to. Instead of hissing at him like a trapped animal again, he now nodded and let him carefully place a hand on his shoulder, shuddering at the freezing cold touch he was met with. 

“Oh dear, you’re burning up”

The words confused him enough to make him tilt his head ever so slightly, looking up at Vessel with a questioning glance while taking more deep breaths. He didn’t feel hot, didn’t even feel all that warm. If he had a fever he’d be aware of it. 

“Your skin, it’s almost painful to touch” Vessel murmured as he gently pulled at II’s shoulder, trying to turn him around without putting him in an uncomfortable position. When he saw the black patches on his back he stopped in his tracks. II’s breath hitched in his throat, making Vessel shush him softly.

“It’s alright, you’re alright. I just want to take a closer look, maybe I can figure out what they are”

So II turned around further, giving the other man a full view of the damage. He felt careful fingertips trailing over his skin, a shiver running up his spine when Vessel lightly pressed a finger to one of the thick black lines. They’d become quite sensitive to the touch in the short time since he himself had discovered them. The thought of them developing so rapidly made his breath catch in his throat. He inhaled slowly, trying to stop himself from losing his composure again.

“Did you get them too?” he croaked, praying the other man would say yes and tell him he wasn’t alone in his fate. He was not so lucky today.

“No, I’ve never seen anything like this before. They look like they stopped spreading out, but they have started becoming more sensitive very quickly, right?”

He nodded, turning his head around to meet Vessel’s gaze. He’d expected to find fear in his eyes, disgust, perhaps even resentment. What he did not expect, however, was the compassion he was met with. The man gave him a warm smile, hoping to reassure him at least a little bit, before turning his attention back to the black under his skin.

“I don’t think there’s much we can do about the spots for now. They will most likely stay for a while, then either disappear again or at least stop being hot and painful to touch. Would it help if we covered them up so you no longer have to see them?”

II nodded weakly. Vessel quickly scanned the room for anything he could use, before shrugging and pulling his own sweatshirt over his head and handing it to him. He could’ve gotten up and grabbed one of the towels but he didn’t want to leave the man alone, even just for a few seconds. II sighed as he put it on.

“M’sorry for all the trouble. I just- it caught me off guard. Should’ve handled it on my own. They’re disgusting. I’m sorry for making you look at them, next time I will-”

He was cut off before he could continue 

“None of that. I’m glad you let me help you, I most certainly won’t let you out of my sight today. The best way to deal with these things is to distract yourself from them until you’re ready to make peace with them”

II wanted to open his mouth to argue, instead tilting his head in confusion at the words.

“You said you never had them, how would you know?”

Now it was Vessel’s turn to sigh deeply. He hesitated for a moment, looking at the utterly disheveled man below him before giving himself a quick nod. Perhaps opening up to each other just a little bit wasn’t the worst idea, at least today.

He moved both hands up to his own cheeks, finding the white bandages under his eyes that he’d started wearing just a few weeks ago. They were subtle enough that you hardly saw them unless you got close to his face, II had almost forgotten about them already. He’d assumed that Vessel had some sort of injury under his eyes, or maybe markings from Sleep he didn’t want anyone to see. So he watched intently as the other man carefully pulled at the bandages, removing them slowly. 

II had expected just about anything except for the two small eyes that blinked down at him. He let out a surprised noise. They were smaller, different in shape to normal eyes, no lashes, with two strange irises in shapes and colors that made his head spin. He stared at them with his own eyes ripped wide open.

“Oh… when did that-“ he gasped, trying hard not to sound like he was put off or judgmental. 

“Few weeks ago. They started growing right after my first encounter but it took a really long time”

“Do they… work? Can you see?”

“Yeah I can, although things look weird through them. Can’t really describe it, it just doesn’t seem normal. Then again, I shouldn’t expect any of this to be normal anymore”

II almost snorted at the words, the absurdity of the situation catching up to him.

“So why do you keep them covered up? It must be extremely uncomfortable”

Vessel shook his head, shifting into a more comfortable position and thinking about the words for a few seconds before responding.

“I know I said they work, but I haven’t figured out how to actually use them yet. I always end up trying to look out of both pairs at the same time. It gives me awful headaches so it’s easier to just keep them closed”

And because I didn’t want to frighten you

Vessel left the last few words unspoken, already feeling exposed enough as it was. He wanted to cover them right back up but decided to let II have his fun for a few moments, watching as he curiously looked into the small pair of eyes from all angles and twitched when they actually squinted. It was endearing, and he was glad that II had managed to break out of his panic and mostly calm down again. He spent a few more minutes blinking at the man with all four eyes, delighting in the huffed out chuckle it pulled from him. 

“That’s so fucking cool” II said absentmindedly. 

Vessel scoffed and threw him a glance that made II tilt his head in confusion, shifting his attention from the lower pair back to his normal eyes.

“You don’t actually believe that, do you? If anything they are really just disgusting”

“Are you out of your mind? They are beautiful”

They both froze for a moment, processing the words that had slipped from II before he could stop them. He wanted to sink into the ground and never reappear. Vessel felt a strange sensation bubbling up in his chest. Before he could open his mouth however, II spoke up again, a somewhat frantic undertone in his voice.

“They are nice. I would certainly much rather have another pair of eyes than those… things on my back. Now those are disgusting for sure, and useless too at that”

Vessel shook his head. “I don’t know, I think they look kinda cool. Like lightning scars”

II rolled his eyes but couldn’t stop a smile from tugging at the corners of his mouth. He motioned for the other man to help him get up, not quite sure if he could already trust his legs again. Vessel understood, pulling both himself and II up off the ground in one swift motion, keeping a hand on his shoulder to steady him.

“What would you like to do now?”

II thought about it for a few moments. The reality of the whole situation was starting to catch up with him, embarrassment washing over him with such intensity that he had to avert his gaze.

“You don’t have to look after me, I’ll be fine, really”

“But I want to”

He shook his head, turning his attention to the sink, glancing at his own face in the mirror. He looked awfully disheveled, his hair a mess, reddened eyes staring back at him in an exhausted expression. 

“Why” he asked quietly. 

Vessel brought a hand up to his hair, scratching at his scalp nervously. He didn’t know how to answer the question, didn’t understand why he felt the urge to watch over the other man. It wasn’t protectiveness, he knew that II was perfectly capable of looking after himself and that he would most likely be alright on his own today. It was more of a craving, a desire to be around him, even though he always managed to resist it and keep a distance between them. The only reason he gave in to it today was because he felt the other man needed it. So instead of a giving a response to the question, he decided to change the subject. 

“We could go for a walk if you feel up to it. Or just, I don’t know, maybe watch a movie? Unless there’s something else you can think of”

He wasn’t subtle at all, but II didn’t call him out on it. He turned back towards Vessel and gave him a nod. 

“I guess a movie will be enough distraction”

He hesitated before he spoke up again, quieter this time.

“Thank you. For the- for helping me.”

“Of course I would. If it happens again please don’t try to hide it, you aren’t supposed to go through these transformations on your own.”

“Well neither are you”

The words caught Vessel off guard. He opened his mouth, then closed it again, knowing there were no good arguments he could use. 

“It’s not the same-“ he tried, immediately getting cut off by II. 

“Oh yes it is the same, don’t give me that. You said your eyes started growing weeks ago and you just decided to hide them? You shouldn’t go through things alone either”

He looked at him with a dumbfounded expression. He hated being speechless but the alternative was stuttering awkwardly, the thought of it even worse than his current predicament. II spoke up again, his tone softer this time.

“Have you never considered that I would like to help you too?”

Vessel wanted to turn around and rip the bathroom door open, to run away from the other man and lock himself in his bedroom for the rest of the week. Instead he stood frozen like a deer in headlights. The words terrified him in a way he didn’t even understand, a lump slowly forming in his throat. He shook his head, desperately trying to think of something to say that would take the attention away from him again. II was faster than him.

“I’m not trying to force you to do anything. But please just keep it in mind.”

And with that he patted Vessel on the shoulder gently before opening the door, making his way out of the bathroom and turning around, waiting for him to follow.

____________________

Vessel cooking for II

II was ripped from his sleep by a loud clattering noise, followed by a hissed out curse. He shot up before he was even really awake, letting his eyes dart through the room to locate the source of the noise, taking several moments to orientate himself and remember where exactly he was. The sound of heavy rain against the window brought it back to him as he yawned and rubbed his eyes. He’d dozed off on the sofa in the small living room while watching an awfully boring movie, getting lulled to sleep by the steady drumming of the raindrops against the window after hoping in vain to make his afternoon even slightly less boring. Now the cloudy sky was even darker than before, showing he must’ve been asleep for quite a while. 

Looking back down at himself made him tilt his head to the side, processing. He could’ve sworn he hadn’t had a blanket over him before he drifted off, neither had he turned the TV off, which could only mean Vessel had come downstairs at some point while he was asleep. The realization that the man had cared enough to cover him with the blanket and make sure he could sleep peacefully made II’s heart flutter in his chest for a brief moment, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Vessel had started with little gestures of affection like that a while ago, it made II clutch his chest in fear of bursting with overflowing emotions every single time. 

He got up from the sofa, straightening his back and stretching his limbs out when he remembered why he’d woken up in the first place. The noise seemed to have come from the kitchen so that’s where he made his way, grabbing the blanket to wrap it around his shoulders before slowly walking out of the room. 

A smell hit his nose when he arrived at the kitchen, making him close his eyes and inhale deeply to categorize it, trying to figure out why it smelled so familiar. He came to a halt, standing in the doorframe and taking in the scene in front of him. Vessel had his back turned to him, deeply focused on staring at the large pot on the stove. 

“Whatcha making?” II asked curiously, causing the other man to wince and turn around, staring at him like a deer in headlights. 

“I- did I wake you? Oh I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-“ he stammered. The look on his face made II chuckle, moving from his position in the doorframe to walk over to the stove. 

“S’no problem, I think I slept more than enough. But seriously, what is this? It smells so familiar somehow”. He looked into the pot now while Vessel took a step back, cleaning his throat awkwardly. 

“Well, you mentioned it once. That stuff you said your parents always made when you were young.”

II snapped his head around to stare at Vessel, making him grow even more flustered and try to explain himself frantically. 

“You just- you said you liked it. That it reminded you of nice things. Of home. I thought- I don’t know. That I could maybe give it a try. The recipe didn’t sound too complicated but I really have no idea how to cook- and I’m pretty sure I ruined it and-“

II cut him off, voice quiet and trembling. 

“You remember that? You- you were listening?”

Vessel’s face contorted from embarrassment into confusion, brow furrowing. “Of course I did. I always listen. Why would I not?”. He caught the look on II’s face, wide eyes staring up at him with a mix of disbelief and something else he couldn’t quite place. His heart twisted painfully in his chest, realization setting in. “You thought I wasn’t listening?”

II dropped his gaze at that, realizing what he had just said. He turned away from the other man back towards the stove, quickly shaking his head and reaching for one of the sharp kitchen knives. 

“You- uh…”. He took a deep breath to regain his composure. “The reason I almost didn’t recognize the smell was because you didn’t add nearly enough garlic. I know the recipe probably said to use two cloves but that’s nonsense, we need at least four if not more. But you did a really good job for someone who’s trying this recipe for the first time, I also messed it up the first few times I tried”

The babbling was a desperate attempt at deflecting the question and thankfully Vessel played along, reaching for a knife as well and grabbing more of the garlic as II started talking about his sister teaching him various recipes when he was younger. He listened with one ear, just as he always did, but he couldn’t get rid of the gnawing feeling in his chest. He enjoyed listening to II as he recounted his memories and stories, thought the other man was aware of it. He hadn’t realized until now just how silent he’d always been during these talks, never offering any of his own memories in turn or really doing anything to contribute to the conversation. Perhaps it was time he started warming up to the other man, at least a little bit.

——————————

Thanks to II the food had ended up smelling absolutely divine, making Vessel’s mouth water much more than he had expected. They filled two plates and settled down at the small kitchen table together, a tense silence threatening to fill the room until Vessel tried the first bite of his food and couldn’t help but sigh. II looked up at him with excitement sparkling in his eyes.

“Tastes good?”

Vessel nodded, taking a moment to savour the taste before he answered. 

“This is actually so much better than I expected, you should really teach me how to make it again. Properly next time”

A bright smile lit up II’s face and Vessel couldn’t help but grin back for a second. He motioned for the other man to grab his fork, saying: “You are the one I cooked this for, not the other way around. Go ahead and try it”, before taking another bite. II nodded at that, finally starting to eat as well.

They spent a few minutes like that, just eating in comfortable silence, until Vessel’s head perked up at the small sniffle from the other side of the table. II had his head down, staring at his plate with eyes unfocused and glossy, frozen in place as if he was thinking about something intensely. 

“Are you alright? Something wrong with how it tastes?” Vessel asked with concern in his voice, putting his fork down and shifting his full attention onto the other man. II snapped out of his trance then, quickly wiping the sleeve of his hoodie across his eyes and taking a shaky breath before replying.

“Yeah I’m- don’t worry it’s all good. It’s just… a lot. I haven’t had this in years, don’t even remember the last time actually. It’s sort of… nostalgic and just- the fact that you remembered…”

His voice trailed off and he took another deep breath to try and compose himself. Vessel couldn’t help but reach out a hand, carefully resting it on the other man’s cheek and wiping a tear from the corner of his eye softly. II looked back at him dumbfounded, not knowing how to react to the warm hand against his skin, not sure if he should let it happen or pull away. Before he could open his mouth to ask the question, Vessel interrupted him, his voice low and gentle.

“I always listen. I know I don’t look like I do because I never respond to anything. But I listen. And I remember. Of course I do, I really enjoy your stories.”

More tears started filling the man’s eyes and he leaned into the gentle touch of Vessel’s hand, taking a deep unsteady breath.

“Oh, it’s alright. Will you teach me more of those recipes you mentioned? I really do need to get better at cooking”

II couldn’t help but giggle at that, nodding his head and sniffing again. 

“We don’t have nearly enough spices in this place, I’m taking you shopping before I show you anything else” he said, pulling away from Vessel’s hand to wipe his eyes once more. His heart skipped a frantic beat when the other man laughed heartily at his words, saying “that’s fair enough” before they both reached for their forks again.

____________________

Beach date

“If you’re still planning on getting in the water you should do it soon, it’ll probably be way too cold in just about an hour”

II glanced up from his book to meet Vessel’s gaze. The man towered over him, standing just inches away from his big towel and looking down at II expectantly. Little drops of saltwater fell from his wet hair. He hadn’t even heard him approaching, the last time he’d looked up Vessel had still been buried somewhere deep beneath the ocean waves, only coming up every few minutes to catch a breath before diving back under. II had no intentions of finding out if the water was as cold as it looked.

“I’m good here” he replied, brushing a bit of sand off his towel before patting it, inviting Vessel to sit down beside him. The tall man scoffed before throwing himself next to II, getting even more sand on the towel than there had been in the first place. II glared at him. The glare quickly trailed off into gawking when Vessel leaned back and closed his eyes, taking a deep, contented breath.

One of his long strands of hair stuck to his cheek and II felt the overwhelming urge to reach out and tuck it behind a pointed ear, though he caught himself in time, not wanting to disrupt the peaceful expression on the man’s face, his little relaxed smile making II’s chest fill with a warm feeling he couldn’t bear to categorize. It was a rarity to see him in such a comfortable state, so II allowed himself to bask in Vessel’s beauty for just a few moments. Being near the ocean made the man glow in a way that rendered II speechless sometimes. 

The golden evening sunlight hit his face just right for the tiny freckles under his left eye to become visible, a few of them touched by his long lashes. He used to have the majority of his cheeks and his nose covered in the little specks. Most of them had faded over time, only making II cherish the ones still left even more. Small drops of water made Vessel’s smooth skin look like it was sparkling, almost in an ethereal way, from his face to his shoulders and all the way down his chest. 

Before II could let his gaze trail further, Vessel opened an eye. II should’ve been embarrassed about getting caught staring but he could only lock his gaze with the other man, marvelling in just how much the color of his eyes resembled that of the ocean. So it was Vessel’s turn to grow flustered, hastily sitting up straight and opening his mouth to speak. 

“Why do you come here if you never join me in the water? It’s chilly but not too cold to swim, otherwise I wouldn’t be doing it. Doesn’t it bore you to just spend hours sitting here doing nothing?”

II averted his gaze then, quickly reaching for his book and holding it up. “I’m not doing nothing. Reading is relaxing. Don’t worry about me, I don’t need to be in the water”

“Does it scare you? We can look for a place where the waves aren’t as heavy”

II sighed. “It doesn’t scare me”. He wished he could come up with some sort of distraction, but Vessel already continued his questioning.

“So what is it then? When was the last time you actually did swim”

And there it was. He couldn’t stop his face from turning red, hoping he was hiding it well enough that Vessel couldn’t see it. He considered just lying, thinking of a plausible explanation, like not wanting to get dry skin from the salty water. But he hesitated. It wouldn’t be the most embarrassing story to tell, in comparison to some of the things Vessel already knew about him. It wasn’t the biggest deal in the world. He trusted him, enough to open up to him step by step, so surely a silly detail such as this one wouldn’t get him met with judgement. He took a deep breath, staring at the ocean intensely, refusing to face the other man as he spoke.

“I uh… I don’t- I can’t swim”

Silence settled between them for a few moments. II wished he could sink into the ground and never reappear. 

“I see” came the response from Vessel. “Why?”

He released the breath he hadn’t even realized he was holding. Vessel sounded curious, confused, maybe slightly taken aback, but there was no malice anywhere in his tone. II had fully expected him to laugh at least a little bit. He cleared his throat, thinking of how to answer the simple question. 

“Just never got the chance to learn. Swimming lessons were really fucking expensive when I was young, and it’s not like we had the ocean anywhere nearby. Sure, there was a few lakes and stuff, but no one really bothered to actually teach me. And I was too nervous to teach myself, so I just never did. Didn’t think I’d ever need it anyway.”

“That makes sense” Vessel simply said. II turned around to face him now, cautiously searching his eyes for any traces of well concealed judgment. He had been so prepared for a negative response that he couldn’t comprehend why it wasn’t happening. The other man seemed to notice his uneasiness, offering him a quick smile before speaking once more. 

“So would you like me to teach you?”

II couldn’t help but rip his eyes open at that, blush making its way back to his cheeks in full force. He shook his head frantically. 

“I really don’t think that’s necessary, I promise, I have no problem just watching you swim”

In his haste he didn’t even realize what he’d just revealed, not noticing the smirk that ghosted over Vessel’s face for a split second. He was kind enough not to address the words when he continued.

“I know you’re content over here. But you really are missing out, you know? The ocean is so much prettier beneath the waves, you can’t even imagine it. I would love to show you, so yes, I would have no problem teaching you how to at least feel a little bit more comfortable in the water. Only if you want, of course”

II didn’t know what to say. The prospect sounded so tempting, deep down he knew he’d lied earlier, about not bothering to learn because he didn’t care. He’d always wanted to swim in the ocean, just never thought he would ever get the chance. The thought of getting to be so close to Vessel and sharing one of his favorite things with him was enough to almost make him give in, only held back by the crippling fear of making a fool of himself, burdening the other man and ruining everything somehow. He sat in silence for several minutes, getting lost in deep thoughts that threatened to turn against him any second. Before he could trail off into overthinking however, he was ripped from his state by Vessel jumping up beside him, coming to stand and holding out a hand at II. 

“Let me just try a little bit. If you don’t like it you can come right back to this towel and I won’t bother you about it again, I promise. But I think it could be fun”

And II knew that he meant it, could see the sincerity in his eyes. So he accepted the hand, letting himself be pulled up off the ground. Vessel threw him a warm smile that almost made his knees give out, then started making his way towards the shore with II right behind him. The waves weren’t as heavy as they had been earlier, though still big enough for nervousness to settle in II’s entire body the closer they got. He yelped when he took his first small step into the water, shooting Vessel an outraged glance. 

“You said it wasn’t cold! How do you even swim in this!”

Vessel couldn’t help but snicker at the expression on the shorter man’s face. “You’ll get used to it quickly. Come on” he said, grabbing II’s hand once more and moving to stand in front of him, his back facing the ocean. He started taking slow steps backwards, gently pulling II along with him deeper into the water.

They took their time with it, stopping after every few steps so he could get used to the water’s temperature and steady himself on the uneven ground. When the water touched his lower back he paused, a shiver running up his spine. Vessel tilted his head in a silent question.

“I don’t- you know you don’t have to do this” II mumbled hesitantly. He tried not to let it show just how uneasy he was. Vessel’s gaze softened and he took a step towards II, giving his hand a soft squeeze.

“The first time I went into the ocean I was so scared I almost cried” he said. II’s eyes widened, he could not picture the man ever being afraid of the ocean. He looked like he wasn’t more comfortable in any other place on earth.

“Really?”

“Yes. It’s a perfectly normal thing to be intimidated by it. If you want to go back then we will, but if you are simply as nervous as I was back then, I promise you it’ll settle. I would never make you do anything I knew was dangerous.”

The words had a soft pink hue creeping up on II’s face, half out of embarrassment, half from something else. He took one long, deep breath, then gave his nod of approval to start moving again. None of his nervousness had disappeared but he trusted Vessel not to let anything happen to him. They made their way deeper into the water until it reached up to his shoulder blades, his body slowly getting used to the freezing temperature. 

It was Vessel who stopped this time, gently placing a hand on II’s chest.

“You tell me if you get uncomfortable”

“I will”

II had thought that Vessel meant the depth of the water, fearing that he would get uncomfortable after being in it for too long. He did not however expect the man to wrap one of his long arms around his waist and pull him close to his own body, holding him in a tight grip. Before he could even process the sudden close proximity or ask what he was doing, Vessel took a few long steps backwards until neither of them could feel ground beneath their feet anymore. II instinctively wrapped both arms around the man’s chest and clung to him, the uneasiness just barely overshadowing the frantic beating of his heart. They were nearly face to face now. He quickly twisted his head to the side, leaning against Vessel’s jaw to avoid having to look at him as he slowly brought them into deeper water.

“You alright?” came the question.

“Yeah I’m good” II choked out. “Don’t drop me”

“Would never”

Vessel felt fingers digging into the skin of his back and decided it would be best to fill the tense silence for a while, hoping to distract II from his nervousness at least a little bit. 

“You lived in the countryside, right? So when was the last time you actually went swimming?”

His head was spinning. It took him a few moments to come up with an answer. “Hell, when I was maybe thirteen? Around that age”. 

The other man stared at him, the shock on his face making II snort. “Told you it didn’t happen often”. 

“So do you remember the day?”

“Oh I remember alright. It must’ve been summer holidays because I can’t think of any other reason why my whole family would’ve decided to do a, as they called it, beach day ”

Vessel listened intently, snickering at the way he scoffed the last words. “Beach day wasn’t all that fun?”

“It was fun, it just wasn’t a beach. Unless you consider a cramped little lake in the middle of the woods to be a suitable beach, that is. Half of the town was there that day because the weather was so nice. I don’t exactly remember every detail, but I do know that it was one of the only days that summer where I could actually have fun with the other kids, without having to keep an eye on my siblings the whole time.”

His words made the other man frown. “Surely there were other days where you had time to yourself?”

“A handful, maybe”

II turned to face Vessel when he heard him tut, giving him a reassuring smile. “It wasn’t all that bad. I had my fun even with them, of course”

“Yes but that means you’re owed a lot of nice experiences you never got to fully enjoy”, Vessel spoke. “Maybe we can go over some of them, see if we find a way to do them sometime”

II’s face grew red at the words. He made the mistake of trying to distract by turning his head and looking back to where they had left their towel, suddenly becoming acutely aware of just how far away from the shore they had moved already. His nails dug into Vessel’s shoulder.

“Far enough. That’s deep enough” he croaked. 

Vessel paused immediately, looking down at him while treading in place. 

“You’re right, this is a good depth”. 

He thought about his next steps for a few minutes, trying to figure out the best way to approach things. It had been so long since anyone taught him how to swim, he just did it completely naturally nowadays, the same way he walked or breathed. Actually explaining the basics was much harder than he’d expected. 

“Alright so, first of all, don’t panic. Panicking is the worst thing you can do. I won’t just throw you out there and tell you to start swimming, we can start with something easy. I’m not gonna let go of you unless you tell me to. Sound good?”

II nodded. He took as deep of a breath as he could manage, releasing some of his tension that had him squeezing the other man with an iron grip. Vessel gave him a subtle smile before continuing. 

“You can technically let go of me, y’know? I’m the one who has to hold you”

II rolled his eyes as Vessel snickered, feeling his cheeks heat up yet again. He cautiously removed one of his arms from around the man’s chest. His mind was screaming at him not to let go, the hardest part of the whole situation convincing himself he was safe, that he could trust the other man not to let anything happen to him. He kept his right arm around Vessel, not yet feeling comfortable enough to remove it, though he did bring a small amount of distance between their bodies. He was amazed at how easily the man managed to keep both of them up with only one arm, hardly even showing any signs of struggle. 

“So what now”

“Let’s see”, Vessel spoke. “Swimming will be much easier for you once you know how to keep yourself above water on your own. I want you to put your hands on my shoulders and keep your arms outstretched so you can move your legs freely without touching mine”

II carefully did as he was told, moving his hands to the man’s shoulders and pushing himself back as far as he could. The water around them no longer felt freezing cold, despite the sun starting to dip below the horizon bit by bit. He sighed.

“We’re not making it home before it gets dark”

Vessel followed his gaze, getting caught up in the way the feathery pink clouds on an orange sky made the scene look like a painting. He’d been so focused on the man clinging to his chest that he hadn’t even noticed the sun starting to set. They both took a few moments to simply bask in the atmosphere around them, the play of colors reflecting on the water. He inhaled the salty air deeply.

“I don’t mind. It’s nice out here”

II huffed out a short chuckle at the words. “I know you don’t mind, but I would rather not be in the water when it’s dark. So”, he gave his shoulder a squeeze to bring him back to reality, “what’s next”. 

Vessel hummed for a moment, taking a few more seconds to gaze out at the horizon before turning to face the other man again. He tilted his head to the side, thinking, then speaking.

“Start treading your legs just like I’m doing right now. You don’t have to flail them hard or shake them around, just making little treading movements will do”

And so that’s what he did. He started copying Vessel’s movements, at first kicking his legs awkwardly before he fell into a more steady rhythm. It felt pleasant, the water softly brushing against his skin with each swing of his legs. Vessel watched him intently, a contented smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth.

“Would you look at this. You’re doing a great job”

II shook his head, feeling silly about receiving praise for such a simple task. 

“I don’t see how this is going to make me swim”

“It won’t. But you need to know how to not drown before you even try to move forward, so this is what we’ll focus on for now. So, this is gonna be a little more complicated, we’re both gonna have to do the same thing” 

Vessel motioned for him to remove one arm from his shoulder and move it the way he had earlier. He started doing the same, both of them holding on to each other with one arm and keeping themselves above water with the other. Their movements were nearly perfectly synchronised, the grin on II’s face mirrored back at him from Vessel.

“Told you it was going to be fun”

—————————

By the time they were back on the beach, drying themselves off with the towels hastily, the new moon sky was near pitch black and sprinkled with little stars here and there. Neither of them had any idea how much time exactly they had spent in the water. II shivered as he snatched his clothes from the bag they’d brought with them, slipping into them so frantically he nearly lost his balance in the uneven sand. 

“We are coming here earlier next time” he huffed out. Vessel laughed heartily next to him, drying his long hair to the best of his ability. The cold didn’t seem to affect him, not even a hint of a tremble in his body. He was glowing, overflowing with energy and so elated it made II’s heart flutter in his chest. 

He was so entirely in his element near the water that he almost turned into a completely different person. II wondered if that person was perhaps who he’d been before Sleep, before everything that happened to him. He cherished every glimpse he managed to catch of that person, basking in the rare moments of Vessel’s happiness whenever he could. His face turned bright red when the man looked at him, the second time that day he’d caught him staring. 

“Something wrong?” he asked while twisting his hair up into a bun, glancing at II curiously. II shook his head and averted his gaze, praying the lack of moonlight was enough to hide his flushed cheeks as he quickly muttered a response. 

“Just- it was fun today. More than I expected. Your enthusiasm about the water really is contagious. Would love to try this again, the next time we come here. If you would like that?”

He looked up to find Vessel beaming at him, eyes nearly sparkling with excitement like the stars above them. Before he could say another word, he was pulled into a tight hug by the taller man. Hug wasn’t the right word, a hug would imply he could move his arms to return it. Vessel had picked him up the way a child would pick up a cat, squeezing him close to his chest and trapping his arms without even realizing. He let out a surprised noise when he felt himself being lifted off the ground and twirled around for just a second, before Vessel put him back down gently and took a step back. 

He was even more flushed than II, obviously having acted on impulse and only now realizing what he’d just done. II swore his heart was going to burst right out of his chest. Before the other man could open his mouth to start his frantic apologizing, he interrupted him. 

“Cute. So I’ll take that as a yes? I’m pretty sure the weather will be even better tomorrow, why don’t we take another day off just like this one”

Vessel nodded, keeping his gaze fixed to the ground awkwardly until II reached for his hand and pulled him along, the two of them making their way through the sand towards the parking lot.

______________________

Movie night

“When was the last time you had a movie night with someone”

Vessel looked up from the pages on his desk. They were mostly empty, save for a few a few words scribbled on them hastily. He released the tight grip he had on his pen and turned around to face II. The other man looked at him expectantly from his position on the bed. 

“I don’t remember. It must’ve been a long time ago… I don’t even know if I ever did anything like that”

II’s face dropped. “Are you serious?” he asked with an appalled undertone in his voice. Vessel signed.

“Can’t really think of any time at least. Why do you ask?”

“Because you’ve been sitting at that desk for three hours and I saw you use that pen maybe five times. You know that pushing yourself to write isn’t gonna bring you any good results”

Vessel opened his mouth to argue but II kept talking while moving towards the edge of the bed and reaching under it, trying to grab something. 

“And you’ll likely spend the rest of the night like that and then be awfully cranky tomorrow. I don’t have the time for any of that and neither do you. So.”

He gave himself a satisfied nod, pulling their laptop out from under the bed and placing it in his lap. 

“Why don’t you put the pen down and get over here. There’s a movie I really think you could enjoy. I promise you it’s gonna be much more fun than staring at that page until your eyes burn.”

Vessel was taken aback by his words, by how well the other man could read and predict him. He wanted to argue but II was absolutely right, he knew his brain wouldn’t give him anything good that night. He’d spent many nights staring at blank pages until his head started hurting, until frustration overtook him and he started spiralling into a frenzy. This one was a cozy night, rain pouring down the window outside, the lights in the warm room dimmed. The prospect of spending the next few hours peacefully instead sounded much more tempting. And so he nodded, placing the pen on the empty pages and getting up from his chair to take the few steps over to the bed. 

II gave him a contented smirk, scurrying over to the other side of the bed so Vessel could settle down next to him. He turned the laptop on and started searching for the movie while Vessel leaned against the propped up pillows awkwardly, trying to figure out where to put his hands and how to sit. 

“You do like those old horror movies, right?”

He nodded, not realizing that he hadn’t spoken out loud until II turned around to him with a questioning look. His face turned red in embarrassment. 

“Yeah. I do. Sorry” 

II noticed how uneasy he was, shifting his focus from the screen fully to the other man. “You know you don’t have to say yes, right? If you don’t wanna do this it’s perfectly fine” he said gently. Vessel quickly shook his head. “That’s not- I do want to. I promise. I just-“. 

He sighed, ran a hand across his face. II waited patiently for him to gather his words. 

“I do remember the last time. Last time I did this, I mean. It was with…”

He didn’t continue the sentence, hoping the other man would know what he was getting at. II gave him a soft look, not pitying, just filled with empathy. He spoke again.

“I want to. I was just remembering.”

“I understand. We can do this any way you want. You don’t have to tell me more. Just do whatever makes you most comfortable”

Vessel felt his heart swell in his chest, couldn’t help but smile gingerly. II returned his smile, placing one of his hands on the bed next to Vessel’s leg and shifting his focus back to the screen, typing something with the other. This was something he’d started doing a while ago, putting his hand near Vessel so he could choose whether or not he wanted to take it. He did tonight, carefully grabbing the hand and watching the grin on the other man’s face grow even wider.

——————————

II had been right, Vessel did enjoy the movie. He was surprised he’d never heard of it before since it was exactly his taste. They were about halfway through it now, the shorter man leaning against him, both of them curled up in a more comfortable position under the blankets with the laptop resting on both of their legs. They hadn’t let go of each other’s hands, hearts fluttering every time one of them shifted and reminded them of their position. 

II had paid attention to the movie for exactly 10 minutes, since then he’d simply snuck glances at the man beside him or focused on their closeness and every point where their bodies touched. It wasn’t often that he got to be this close to Vessel, to look at him without getting noticed because of how deeply immersed he was in the movie. II had been staring often enough, but the realization hit him as if it was the very first time, just how beautiful the other man really was. How soft his lips looked in the dim light of the bedroom. How easy it would be to lean upwards and reach them.

He quickly turned his gaze back to the screen, trying to get himself to think of something, anything else. He could not let his mind go there. II’s efforts were for nothing when Vessel suddenly chuckled at something one of the characters had said, his focus immediately shifting back to the man. The sound of his laughter nearly made him gasp. His heart was beating so fast he was surprised Vessel didn’t notice, or perhaps he was aware and just kind enough to ignore it. 

Enough was enough, II decided. He wasn’t about to sit through this movie feeling like a nervous teenager on his first date. And so he shifted, positioning himself in a way that no longer allowed him to stare. He didn’t notice the disappointed frown creeping up on Vessel’s face.

—————————

Vessel was pulling off the performance of a lifetime pretending to be deeply focused on the movie. 

He had made it about half an hour, genuinely interested in what was happening on the screen, before II had shifted and reminded him of the fact that they were still holding hands, the shorter man’s body pressed against his own comfortably. It had it him like a freight train then, the weight of the situation, the tension in the air between them. 

He would’ve loved to actually watch the movie but his mind would no longer let him, instead focused on making his heart skip a frantic beat every time he felt even the slightest shift of the other man against him. He didn’t dare look down at him, knew he wouldn’t be able to hold himself back the moment he moved even a single muscle. So he sat, still as a statue, trying to keep his breathing steady and his eyes glued to the screen. 

His plan worked for about 20 minutes until II suddenly moved, turning his head and changing his position to being some distance between them. Vessel knew it was silly but it made his heart twist, feeling like it was a rejection in some way. He sat up straight, causing the other man to turn around and lock eyes with him. He immediately forgot about the sting in his chest, sucking in a sharp breath when he saw the way II looked at him. The unbearable amount of longing in his gaze was almost frightening with its intensity. They stared at each other for a few moments, completely disregarding the movie now, both of them seemingly caught off guard by the fact that they were mirroring each other. Then II opened his mouth to say something and Vessel could no longer contain himself.

II cut himself off before he even started speaking, breath catching in his throat when Vessel released the grip on his hand to move both of his hands up to his face, cupping his cheeks. Before he could process what was happening, the other man closed the distance between their faces, carefully bringing their lips together in a soft kiss. 

II swore he felt his heart stop beating for several seconds before he returned the kiss, his own hands hesitantly coming to rest on the back of Vessel’s head. The softness of his lips made him feel dizzy, head spinning as he pulled him in close. He felt the other man relax then, letting go of his reservations and melting into him. The kiss was hesitant and desperate simultaneously, neither of them really able to believe that they felt the same way, clinging to each other as if they were scared it could end any moment. They pulled back for a split second to catch a deep breath, then immediately crashed their mouths back together clumsily. II felt Vessel smile against his lips and his chest threatened to burst with the overwhelming affection flowing between them, making him sigh into the kiss and pull the man even closer. Vessel ran a thumb over his cheek softly, the relief of not being rejected almost bringing him to tears. 

He felt like was floating, completely oblivious to everything around them until a character on the laptop screen screamed, startling the two men enough to break them from their trance and make them separate. They stared at each other for a brief moment before II huffed out a breathy chuckle, ghosting a fingertip over his reddened lips. As if he couldn’t believe what had just happened. The gesture was so endearing that Vessel reached out and grabbed his hand, pressing a kiss to each knuckle as II’s face grew impossibly more flushed. Neither of them could find enough words to say anything, simply smiling at each other dumbly and basking in the atmosphere that had settled in the room. 

II reached out and carefully brushed a thumb over Vessel’s lips. 

“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting for this.”

Vessel’s face turned bright pink at the words. “Really?” he whispered. II couldn’t even believe the man actually had doubt about this, that he hadn’t noticed in all these months.

“Really. I wanted to, so many times. Never thought you would actually feel the same way”

Vessel gave him a smile bright enough to put the sun to shame.

II leaned in once more for another quick kiss before moving to lay against him just as he had earlier. Only this time Vessel wrapped both arms around the shorter man, pulling him as close as he possibly could, making both of them giggle as II reached to grab the laptop again and place it back on their legs. He chuckled when he hit play.

“We might have to try this movie again another day. I honestly don’t even remember what the main character’s name is”