Work Text:
19th September 2016
We didn’t date
Technically he wasn’t my boyfriend
He was an ex-something
an ex-maybe
an ex-almost?
A thousand texts from Josh have gone through Sam’s phone for the past full year, right. It’s been a year since what happened at the Blackwood Mountain. The unforgettable tragedy at the Washington’s lodge, time sure ran fast.
‘Talk to me Sam, please.’
‘I meant no harm of what happened last year. Please forgive me. Sam, I really need to see you.’
‘Sam, you can’t ignore me forever.’
And hundreds more of texts that had been sent from Josh, Sam did reply some of the text just to get rid of him annoying her. That afternoon was one of the moments the she’d replied to Josh. Grabbing her gear and keys before leaving the house, a perfect afternoon like this is the perfect time for bike riding— for Sam. The blonde’s phone was still in her hand, her fingers were carefully typing while she was walking to her bicycle.
‘What?’ She didn’t give much effort to that reply at all. In fact, she rolled her eyes when she was pressing send. Just half a minute later, a reply came through Sam’s phone.
Sam checked her phone as soon as the alert came on
‘Can I just have another 10 minutes of your life for explaining myself? Please?’
“Ugh.” Sam rolled her eyes once more, which was probably the fifth time of today.
‘Fine. Meet me at In n’ Out. You know which one.’ She immediately tucked her phone in her yoga pant’s pocket and hopped on her bike as soon as she replied the text.
The noise from Josh’s phone aloud as Sam’s text had came through
‘Fine. Meet me at In n’ Out. You know which one.’ A wide smile escaped through Josh’s lips, the brunette immediately gotten out of his couch, quickly grabbed his jacket and rushed out of the door. He knew exactly which In n’ Out Sam was talking about. It was the one where all of them used to hang out at 2am in the morning after their exhaustion of studying. Of course Josh wasn’t the type that would study but Sam and Chris would normally force every one of their friends to do so. Plus, the burgers are too good to resist. It wasn’t that far from Josh’s place either so he was sure that he’d get there before Sam.
Not long after, Josh was sitting at the exact spot where they would usually sit. His hand was running through his own hair. Josh was a bit stressed though he’d gotten rid of his mental illness since the tragedy ended. The missing of Hannah and Beth case were solved, it took quite some time to deal with the fact that his sisters passed away by starvation. But the reason that he was there at In n’ Out, the reason that he’d been texting Sam the whole year wasn’t because of that. It was because Josh never really gotten to confess his feelings toward Sam. Both of them were very obvious of their feelings before the tragedy.
Just when Josh was buried into his own thoughts, a pretended cough sound of the familiar had interrupted. It was Sam’s. Josh immediately looked up at another, she never looked different. She hadn’t change at all.
“Hey, Sam.” A slight smile painted on Josh’s face as Sam was setting herself in the seat across his. She nodded as a response. Sam’s look wasn’t exactly pleasant.
“Say what you need to say.” She finally spoke. Yes, she wasn’t pleasant seeing Josh. Sam and the others included Mike, Jess, Emily, Matt, Ashley and Chris didn’t deserve what they faced last year. Of course what they did to Hannah were too horrible to be forgiven but what Josh did was way out of line. Especially with Sam, she was beside Josh the whole damn time when Josh had an emotionally break down for probably every night after the disappearance of his sisters.
“Sam. I’m really sorry. I know that by saying this wouldn’t make things up but I really am. Please don’t act the way you’re acting to me right now—” Just when Josh was about to finish his sentence, Sam was too annoyed by his words so she interrupted.
“You. You don’t even have the right to ask or beg me anything Josh. Do you even know what you did last year? Yeah congratulations, Josh. You have just won the best prankster of the year award.” Sam leaned forward, placing both of her elbows on the table. Her thoughts burst out into words, they were thrown at Josh that he was not able to look at Sam’s eyes any longer. He was too ashamed. Josh’s face facing down the table, his hands was sweating a little because of the nervousness.
“I— uh” Josh tried to respond to Sam but his lips were shaking, struggling to get his own words out. He was too scared to say anything at this point, as he didn’t want to piss Sam any further. He took a deep breath and slowly letting it out to calm himself down.
“You hurt me Josh, Physically and emotionally. When you were wearing that clown mask!” She reminded him. Yes, indeed he did. He didn’t want to but it was part of his game plan. He had too. At least, he thought he has too.
“Sam. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.” He finally spoke up.
“You know, before everything happen— you were there for me pretty much every time I needed you.” He continued.
“That’s exactly what I meant, Josh. I was there for you the whole fucking damn time.” Inside her, she was kind of relieved that he’d still think of her but she was too deep in her own anger.
“And I’m sorry. I really am. I really am. I’m sorry. Sam, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean harm to anyone. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’m sorry.” Josh started throwing out his apologies; it started to get weird, as he didn’t really stop speaking. He kept saying sorry as his face was still facing down at the table. Sam noticed that something was not right at the time; she’d seen this before. It happened nearly every night and Sam was there pretty much all the time because Josh would normally text her when he realized that things started to go down in his head. She’d normally drive straight out of her house to Josh’s. This time, Sam immediately got out of her seat; rushing herself to him.
“Josh, Shhhhhhh. It’s okay. I’m here.” Sam couldn’t really help but to comfort him like she used to. Yes, she was mad but she wasn’t that cruel. She started rubbing Josh’s shoulders with her hands gently as she was standing behind him. Josh finally stopped throwing out words; he was calmer with Sam by his side. A lot calmer. Sam was still rubbing his shoulders, she couldn’t be mad at him any more as things might’ve gotten worse if she didn’t do anything.
“About us… before everything happen, when you were there for me, I’m just broken without you.” He confessed.
“And what I did was too far and I’m sorry. It’s all I could do right now. I really am sorry and without you with me, I’m just broken.” Josh continued.
Sam stopped rubbing his shoulders, as she made sure that he was one hundred percents calmed. Getting back into her seat across his, Sam decided to face him again. It’s been a year that she was so angry, so mad at Josh. She bit her lower lip, her brows were tiding together in confusion. Sam realized that it’s been too long being mad at Josh. The day when they went to grab some ice-cream together, the day that Josh broke down and all she did was just hugging him on his bed, telling him it’s all going to be okay. Those days mattered to her. She wasn’t happy not being beside him when he needed someone either. She was ready to let go and start over again.
She slightly shook her head before looking up at Josh again. Sam let out a big sigh.
“I— missed you too.”