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“It’s time for you to feel the loneliness I feel.” Sapnap said. “I am always stuck between DNF. It’s DNF plus Sapnap.”
“Pandas, you know that I don’t feel that way- you also know that George doesn’t see it that way. I love you.” Dream said. “We love each other which means we have each other. It doesn’t matter what anyone else says.”
“No.” Sapnap said, crossing his arms.
“No?”
“I had you, Clay. 123. I had you. Then we met George and Karl and then we didn’t have each other. There was no 123. There was no us. There was no more DreamNap . There was just.. nothing. There is nothing.” Sapnap declared. “We do not have each other. We have nothing.”
“Nick.”
“I want to have you, Clay. More than anything.” A pause. “You have a flight to pack for.”
“Pandas, are you even listening to me? I love you. This is becoming complex for no reason.”
Sapnap let out a breath and walked over to Dream, grabbing his face gently. Sapnap pressed their lips together with ease and Dream kissed back for a moment before pulling away. It is what they had both wanted for the last 5 or so years of their friendship, but it wasn’t right. They needed to properly talk about it.
“You can’t just kiss me half a decade later and expect me to just let you hurt me! You can’t just kiss me and expect me to let you break my heart! We aren’t meant to love each other! You’re meant to love Karl and I’m meant to love George. That is what you said yesterday. You’re going against your own words.”
“Clay-“
“Nick. We will talk about this later. I need to pack, like you said.” Dream scooped Patches off the floor and walked off to his room.
“But I loved you the most.” Sapnap said to him before he got out of earshot. Dream had frozen for half a moment and kept going.
——————-
Clay 🐱> hey, the storm is pretty bad tonight. They might make us emergency land in Utah.
Pandas 🐼> shit. You okay?
Clay 🐱> uhm I know nothing will happen but just in case.. I want to say a few things
Pandas 🐼> don’t be stupid
Clay 🐱> I want to go out on the weekends. I want to eat crappy food for dinner. I want to binge watch stupid shows so that when one of us gets sick we can watch it all over again for the comfort of knowing it’s our show. I want to enjoy cuddles on the couch, and waking up with you in my arms in a bed we share. I want to be on your mind in all the best ways, even when we fight. I want to refer to you as Patches’ other dad because you have helped take care of her just as much as me. I want to look at you and know that you are mine… we can even watch every sunset until we hate them. We can do everything that couples do and more. Like fight over who’s doing the dishes and who’s doing the laundry. Or sharing soft kisses that are only soft kisses. We can help each other when things get to be too much. We can grow old together and know forever actually means forever.
Clay 🐱> I guess what I’m trying to get at..
Pandas 🐼> Clay?
Message Failed to send
Dream walked through the airport in a hurry as he looked at his phone trying to force his message to send.
Clay 🐱> I love you
Message Failed To Send
He was growing annoyed beyond belief. How was he meant to get this dumb message out if not even the airport could let him send it.
Dream restarted his phone and finally got the message to send.
Pandas 🐼> omg you’re ok.
Clay 🐱> yes. We are in Utah now, waiting for the storm to clear so we can get back on the plane. I’ll be home in the morning.
Pandas 🐼> don’t fucking scare me like that idiot. How am I meant to tell you I love you back if you’re like dead or something
Clay 🐱> you love me back?
Pandas 🐼> yes you moron. So hurry home so we can get started on your domestic dreams for us
Dream smiled at his phone and sat down on a chair to wait, pulling out his laptop to listen to the song he had been dedicating to Sapnap.
*
Dream opened the door to the house and bent down to pick up Patches. “Hey Patcy, where is your dad?” She meowed and jumped away, leading Dream to his own room. Dream opened the door and saw Sapnap curled up on his bed. Dream chuckled and crawled into his bed, taking Sapnap into an embrace.
They woke up and Sapnap smiled at him. “Hey.”
“Good morning, Pandas.” Dream said and kissed his head. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Dream smiled wide. “Would you like to be my boyfriend?”
“Of course, moron.” Sapnap said before pressing their lips together. Dream didn’t hesitate to kiss back.
*
Clay 🐱> @ the store. Need anything?
Pandas 🐼> yeah George ate the last of my cereal, can you grab me some more?
Clay 🐱> ofc
Clay 🐱> oh, I have a meeting tonight
Pandas 🐼> so don’t wait up for you?
Clay 🐱> probably not
Clay 🐱> sorry, baby
Pandas 🐼> it’s ok, you gotta work
Pandas 🐼> did you sleep good last night?
Clay 🐱> eh, my bed was cold without you
Pandas 🐼> you could have come to bed
Pandas 🐼> I wouldn’t have minded waking up for half a minute so you can lay with me
Clay 🐱> maybe tonight then
Pandas 🐼> you’re sleeping right? I haven’t seen you in days and so I can’t tell if your eye bags are bad or not
Clay 🐱> yes I’m sleeping
Pandas 🐼> ok good
Pandas 🐼> have a good shopping trip <3
Clay 🐱> <3
Dream let out a yawn as he slipped his phone into his pocket, looking in his rear view mirror at his dark eye bags. He frowned and grabbed the concealer from his center console and applied some under his eyes to try and hide the bags. It worked just enough to make it seem like he was up late. There was no proof he hadn’t slept in almost 72 hours.
Dream got out of his car and went into the store, grabbing everything he needed before going home and forcing George and Sapnap to unload the groceries so he could go to his office. He locked the door behind himself to avoid interruptions. Usually he allowed them, hell he loved when Sapnap walked in unannounced for cuddles or kisses. Or even to bring him food.
He had nothing against his boyfriend, he just needed to get this shit done so he could finally sleep.
He didn’t expect to wake up with his head on his keys and a tightness in his neck and back from sleeping on his desk. He sighed and stood up, stretching a bit before leaving the room. He looked at the clock in the hallway and saw it was 4am. At least he got 3 hours of a nap.
Dream went to the kitchen and shook Patches’ food bowl a bit before making himself something quick to eat.
The house was quiet and only the small light above the sink provided a break from the darkness. Patches was probably with Sapnap for the night since she wasn’t in the kitchen with Dream where she normally was.
He felt bad about not being with his boyfriend and finished his snack quickly before making his way to their shared room, crawling into bed with his boyfriend. Dream smiled contently at the kiss to his jaw. “‘Missed you.” Sapnap mumbled and Dream hummed.
“I missed you too, baby. Go back to sleep.” Dream spoke softly and Sapnap nodded, curling into Dream and drifting off to sleep.
Dream had the realization that even when hearts had to break, and sleep schedules got fucked, he would do it all again to have Sapnap in his arms. And to him, it was with it.