Work Text:
Fairy is good. Fairy is very good. Fairy is good good, good, good girl. Yes. Yes yes. Jin gongzi says Fairy is good, very good.
Jin gongzi is strong. Jin gongzi is brave. Jin gongzi is noble. Jin gongzi is righteous. Jin gongzi is a scholar. Jin gongzi is intelligent. Jin gongzi is renowned. Jin gongzi is handsome. Fairy knows because Fairy is there. Fairy is always with Jin gongzi. Fairy will stand beside Jin gongzi and look at his face and Fairy knows: Jin gongzi is all these things.
Jin gongzi lives in a bright place that smells like peony flowers and silk and metal and high-up air and sometimes money stink. Fairy snorts to get that smell out of her nose every time. Little Uncle also has a hidden place that smells like bronze and metal and like sharp brightness but Fairy cannot go there. But Fairy knows it is there because of the sharp brightness and Fairy knows: sharp brightness is powerful. Sharp brightness is inside Jin gongzi and Little Uncle and some people here in Jin gongzi’s house, and some people who come to visit Jin gongzi, and Fairy knows there is sharp brightness in Fairy too.
Other people come to visit Jin gongzi all the time. Fairy is there then too. Little Uncle is always visiting Jin gongzi because he lives here too. Little Uncle’s smells are everywhere like Jin gongzi’s smells. Little Uncle smells like flowers, like peonies, and like ink and like paper too. He wants to smell very very clean but he smells like ink smells too.
Sometimes Big Uncle visits Jin gongzi too. He doesn’t live here. He smells like lotus smells and river water, like the lotus smells and water in the courtyard. When Big Uncle comes, Fairy bows to him and says hello, wāng wāng, and says hello with her tail also. He pats her head with big hands and rubs her head so her ears flap flap flap. He is strong and brave and noble and righteous too and Jin gongzi smells like happiness and love all over when Big Uncle visits. Jin gongzi is always happy when Big Uncle is here.
Sometimes Little Uncle’s brother, Second Brother, comes to visit. Second Brother is very quiet but he tells Fairy that her ears are soft. Second Brother smells like mountains and clouds and mist and rocks. Second Brother smells cool and like green things and sometimes like ink and like paper too. Little Uncle and Second Brother had another brother who was older than them but he left the same way Jin gongzi’s Mother and Father left. When Little Uncle’s Second Brother leaves, his water smells are all mixed with Little Uncle’s flower smells and Little Uncle’s flower smells are all mixed with Second Brother’s water smells, until the smells are gone. Then Second Brother comes back to mix their smells again so they are flowers and water and flowers and water.
Fairy had a Second Brother. Fairy had a Second Sister too. Fairy had so many sisters and brothers and cousins and uncles and aunties and grandmothers and grandfathers but Fairy only had one mother and one father. And when Fairy came out into the world and she couldn’t see and she couldn’t hear, her mother lick lick licked Fairy until Fairy breathed and the first smell was Mother and the second smell was Father.
Jin gongzi sometimes smells like His Mother and His Father, but these are old smells. These are very old smells. Fairy knows them because they were newer smells once, when Fairy was small and Jin gongzi was small. Fairy would smell clothes and Fairy would smell things and Jin gongzi said that this was His Mother’s and this was His Father’s. Jin gongzi has a piece of stone, white stone, jade, that smells like His Mother. Jin gongzi carries his sword, his bright and sharp sword! That smells like His Father. His Father’s smell is deep, deep in the sword, with Jin gongzi’s smell on top of it. Jin gongzi’s sword smells like metal and smells like blood but Jin gongzi’s smell and His Father’s smell are more important.
Sometimes Jin gongzi will go to a place with smells like smoke with sweet and spice in it, like so many different flowers, like stone, like fire, and like sadness. Jin gongzi will sit there a long time sometimes. Sometimes Fairy will sit beside him or lie down on the cool floor. Sometimes Jin gongzi sends Fairy outside to watch because Jin gongzi might be going to turn into Lanlan and that is a secret.
Fairy will stay outside to watch and listen. Fairy has good ears. Fairy can hear whispering voices very far away. Fairy can hear fluffy seeds when they float on winds. Fairy can hear clouds crossing the moon.
If Big Uncle comes with his lotus smells, Fairy will call out to him to greet him, wāng wāng! And bow low to the ground and greet him with her tail too. Big Uncle will sometimes pat Fairy’s head then too. Big Uncle smells of sadness and lotus smells and sometimes anger. He is coiled up like a snake, but he loves Jin gongzi. He smells all over of love. But Jin gongzi needs to know he is here.
If Little Uncle comes, and Little Uncle is always quiet but he is not too quiet for Fairy, Fairy will only speak quietly, wanwan, oofoof. She will sit up properly and Little Uncle will nod to Fairy. Fairy is grateful to Little Uncle because Little Uncle chose Fairy, out of all her brothers and sisters and cousins, to be with Jin gongzi. Little Uncle picked up Fairy and said she was the right one to be with Jin gongzi. But Jin gongzi needs to know he is here too.
If someone else comes to that place, someone with other sounds and other smells and other faces, Fairy will yell, wāng, wāng wāng! And she will make her bells ring. Jin gongzi especially needs to know if they are here. That way, Lanlan can turn into Jin gongzi very fast and hide the Lanlan smells and only smell like Jin gongzi. So fast! Jin gongzi sometimes smells like anger too, sometimes. And Jin gongzi smells like sadness too, sometimes. Fairy will never tell when he does. Never. And Fairy will never tell anyone that Jin gongzi smells like sadness sometimes.
When Jin gongzi smells like sadness, he turns into Jin Ling, who turns into Rulan who turns into Lanlan. Lanlan always smells like sadness. Lanlan cries sometimes and sometimes he cries into Fairy’s furs. Fairy has a big black mane and thick furs for Lanlan to cry into. Fairy has soft ears and a soft tail for Lanlan too. Fairy will lick Lanlan’s face like Mother licked Fairy’s face and taste salt on Lanlan’s face and smell salt in his eyes. Fairy knows Lanlan needs her very much, so she will stay with Lanlan.
When Jin Ling Rulan Lanlan cries into Fairy’s furs, Fairy lets Lanlan cry and when Lanlan is done crying and is going to turn back into Jin gongzi, Fairy takes the tears and smells of sadness outside and shakes shakeshakeshake all the tears and smells of sadness out! All her bells ring ringringringringring! Away! Gone! No more! She shouts too, to scare it all away. No more sadness smells! Gone!
Fairy makes water and makes dirt outside and scrapescrape, kickkick, shakeshake, gone! Fairy comes back to Lanlan who is Jin gongzi again, who is strong and brave and noble and righteous and who says good girl, very good.
Then sometimes Fairy lies on the floor and looks up at Jin gongzi because Fairy would take all Lanlan’s sadness outside and shakeshakeshakeshakeshake and shout, shout, shout! Shout! Shoutshoutshout! And sing! And sing and sing and sing to make the sadness go away! Go away! Go away forever!
But Fairy cannot.
.Jin gongzi goes to sleep and Fairy stays beside him and is very quiet and listening.
Then Jin gongzi shoots with his bow in the sunlight in the morning, zaa, zaa, zaa! Jin gongzi shoots sharp bright beams, zaa! They whistle and his bow makes sounds like music. He shoots! Right at flying things. Kites! Right at kites! Fairy watches, wāng, wāng! Wāng wāng wāng! Because Fairy knows Jin gongzi will always hit! And Jin gongzi hits the kites, pap! And the kites fall, wāng wāng! And when Jin gongzi says, Fairy, go! Fairy goes! Wāng wāng, wāng, wāng! Fairy goes so fast! Fairy can find all the bright beams because they’re sticks now. Fairy finds all the sticks, one, two, three, four, five, more, picks them up, brings them back so Jin gongzi can shoot more kites! Fairy finds the kites too but the kites are dead now because they have a hole in them. Jin gongzi loves to shoot kites! And then Fairy can bring him back more sticks! Jin gongzi never misses. Jin gongzi always hits the sky with his bright beams! So many bright beams! Jin gongzi never misses.
Sometimes Jin gongzi sends Fairy to do things for him like bringing back sticks. Fairy knows to sit and lie down and stay and give paw and go and come back and bring and fetch but Fairy can do so much more. Fairy can do things for Jin gongzi and those are the only times that Fairy is not with Jin gongzi because Jin gongzi needs Fairy to help him and he will be happy when Fairy comes back. Fairy will carry messages for Jin gongzi. Fairy will bring messages back to Jin gongzi. Fairy will find people for Jin gongzi. Fairy will warn Jin gongzi. Fairy will follow people for Jin gongzi. And Fairy will fight! Fairy will bite! Fairy will growl and yell and bite bite bite if Jin gongzi says for Fairy to fight. And if Jin gongzi is hurt, Fairy will fight too! Fairy will yell and bite so much! Fairy will bite until there is blood! Fairy will not let go! Even if Fairy is hurt she. Will. Never. Let. Go. And then Fairy will go to Jin gongzi and no one! Will hurt him anymore. Fairy will use all that sharp brightness too. Fairy is not afraid.
But sometimes if Jin gongzi is in trouble, Fairy will go! Jin gongzi will tell Fairy to go but sometimes Fairy will go because Fairy knows Jin gongzi is in trouble.
Fairy will run runrunrun so fast to find Help who have hands and voices like people because sometimes Jin gongzi needs hands to help him. Fairy can fight! Fairy can smell and dig and run but sometimes Jin gongzi needs Help instead. Sometimes Fairy cannot leave, cannot! Leave! Jin gongzi, but Fairy has a loud voice and can call and call and call and shout and shout for Help. Wāng, wāng, wāng! Then Help will hear Fairy and will come to Jin gongzi. Jin gongzi will tell Fairy she is good with his good voice and good hands and handsome face.
Jin gongzi has His Father’s sword on one side and Fairy on the other. Good, very good.
Jin gongzi is strong. Jin gongzi is brave. Jin gongzi is noble. Jin gongzi is righteous. Jin gongzi is a scholar. Jin gongzi is intelligent. Jin gongzi is renowned. Jin gongzi is handsome. Fairy knows because Fairy is there. Fairy is always with Jin gongzi. Fairy will stand beside Jin gongzi and look at his face and Fairy knows: Jin gongzi is all these things.
Someday Fairy will have to leave Jin gongzi. Jin gongzi will be Lanlan for a long time then, when Fairy leaves but Fairy won’t be there to take his tears and sadness outside. Fairy will have to leave Jin gongzi and Jin gongzi will smell like sadness and have no one to carry it away for him. He will have no one to collect his bright beams and to find his kites. He will have no one to find Help if he is in trouble. He will have no one to watch for Little Uncle or Big Uncle or other people when he is Lanlan. He will have no one to run with him. He will have no one to find him.
No, Fairy will leave behind her bells and her tongue and her furs, but Fairy will still be there with Jin gongzi. Even if there is another with bells and furs, Fairy will still be there with Jin gongzi.
Fairy will still be there with Jin gongzi. Good. Very good.