Chapter Text
timaeusTestified[TT] began pestering gutsyGumshoe[GG] at 4:03
TT: Jane.
GG: Dirk? It is four AM.
GG: That sure is one way to wish someone good morning. What are you up to?
TT: Of course, my mistake for operating off my timezone instead of yours. I should accommodate your delicate sleep schedule first. I’ll have you know that it’s a very reasonable 1:30 where I am.
GG: We live in the same time zone, Dirk. I can see your house from my window.
TT: Oh.
TT: Well, it was only 11 when I started this, so I elect to believe I did nothing wrong.
TT: But sorry anyway.
GG: Alright, Mister Nocturnal, did you pester me just to tell me my name or is there a topic of substance afoot?
GG: By the sound of it you “started” something…
TT: And finished it. Can’t forget that.
GG: Maybe I wouldn’t forget if you had said that in the first place! Dirk, you are presuming a whole lot of things about what I know of whatever it is you’ve been getting up to.
TT: In my defense, I only very recently learned that I’ve been up two and a half hours later than I thought.
TT: You said you can see my house from where you are?
TT: Cool.
TT: Pop on those glasses and tell me if you spot the huge cartoon smoke cloud drifting out of one window.
TT: And then keep them on so you can read what I’m about to send you.
GG: Lands’ sakes, how are you still breathing?
TT: I think the better question is, what am I still breathing.
TT: And the answer is probably more cannabis than oxygen.
TT: Don’t worry about it.
GG: >:B
GG: I’m only not worried because if you suffocated like that, it would be too stupid to be heroic OR just.
TT: Thank you.
TT: To get back to the point, I’ve been writing again. Two novellas. And maybe a comic, if I don’t lose the motivation to keep drawing while choking on weed fumes.
GG: Jeez, two??
GG: All in the last few hours?
TT: Correct. And you get to be their first reader.
TT: So tell me, are you foaming at the mouth for this piping hot literature? Are you slavering for your first bite of the feast I’ve prepared for you?
TT: Here comes the airplane.
Before Jane can respond, two file download links appear in her chat window.
GG: “Meat” and “Candy?”
Perhaps against her better judgment given the time of night, Jane’s natural sense of intrigue is piqued by the titles. She isn’t sure how coherent the contents of either file will actually be, but her friend does sound proud of his work. If they’re too hard to read, she’ll put down her phone and try again in the morning after a full night’s sleep.
TT: Which are you going to read first, Jane?
GG: Let’s see…
The familiar lollipop pictured on the title page for Candy is a bit offputting. If it’s any indication of the story’s contents, she doesn’t think her tired brain would take it very well. She pushes up her glasses to rub at her eyes before opening up the other file.
GG: I think I’ll go with Meat first.
TT: Hell yes. Have fun.
TT: In the meantime, I can feel my body shutting down around me. I’m off to either go to sleep or have a panic attack, not sure which yet.
timaeusTestified [TT] ceased pestering gutsyGumshoe [GG]
Well. Okay then.
Jane closes Pesterchum. She has half a mind to fly over to Dirk’s house anyway, just to make sure he’s somewhat alright, but he got himself into that state. He can get himself out. Besides, going there would mean getting out of bed. She curls up on her side and props her phone up against a crumpled-up section of the duvet. Down the hall, something shuffles on carpet–likely Calliope or Roxy trundling from their respective rooms to the bathroom or kitchen. Harsh white light spills across her face as she begins to read.
At seven AM, the sun rises on Jane Crocker’s weary face. She heaves a deep sigh and tosses her phone to the side. It bounces harmlessly off her bedding and lands somewhere amidst the rumpled fabric. Just then, her morning alarm goes off. Jane grabs for the phone again with a grumble. Her fingers, made clumsy with exhaustion, mistakenly open Pesterchum.
She looks at last night’s conversation.
The alarm blares louder and louder in her ears.
She is going to have some words with one Dirk Strider.