Chapter Text
Keiji couldn’t remember the last time he felt pain like this.
For as long as he existed, Keiji was sure he never felt pain like this.
Loneliness started creeping through Keiji's limbs. It echoed past his limbs and through his skin until it reverberated in the forest around him.
Loneliness was a knife that with every step, dug deeper and made another twist. Never did he have to travel alone. Yet, here he was. Absolutely and utterly alone. He didn't even have his complete self to comfort him.
The events that brought him here were stupid.
Keiji had been stupid.
He had become complacent, let his guard down.
And now he was feeling pain that was greater and deeper than any he had ever felt before. His arm, cradled against his side, soaking his clothes with blood was nothing compared to the pain held in his heart.
–
It happened at dawn. It happened quickly. Keiji was forced to the ground, he was bleeding, and feathers seemed to explode around him as his familiar, Miki, sprung into action. His first attacker was pulled away by his shadows and thrown into a tree with a sickening snap.
As Keiji raised himself up, he searched for Miki, his eyes looking up to the violet sky, missing the archer just past the treeline. The first arrow sliced past his cheek, nicked his ear. Immediately, his eyes darted to the marksman, and he felt his powers surge and fizzle, struggling from the damage to his magical brand. He felt the wind as Miki flew past him, he didn’t need to see her to know her talons were out, ready for the attack, to protect him.
But to Keiji’s horror, he couldn’t do the same for her. His arm was a deadweight at his side, and his magic was for the first time in his existence resisting him. Fear cradled his heart and in sync, he and Miki let out sickening screams.
Miki had done her job though, her talons rendered flesh easily, even after an arrow shot true.
It couldn’t have been more than two minutes, the entire encounter.
His legs trembled terribly as he forced himself forward. He could hear Miki, her labored hoots, her heavy breathing. He could feel their connection shaking. He didn’t let himself collapse until he was beside her.
The bolt stuck from her chest, her black and white feathers saturated with blood. He used his good arm to cradle her close to his chest and Keiji leaned forward, pressed his forehead to hers.
“You deserve better than this,” Keiji whispered. He reached around her and got his hand on the bolt. He couldn’t pull it out with one hand, and he didn’t want to put her through more pain. He snapped it then tossed the shaft aside. She looked at him with the same fondness she always had. Her black eyes, large and round, held the stars within them. She warbled at Keiji. Keiji’s eyes burned with tears, but he refused to let them blur these moments with her. “I wish I was able to take care of you, as you took care of me,” he choked. “I will… Miss you dearly.”
Miki’s body still had it’s familiar warmth as her eyes closed and the connection between them snapped. Then, Keiji finally let his blistering tears fall as sobs wracked his body. He stayed in that clearing, holding Miki until her body grew cold.
Keiji wished he had died with her.
–
A week passed since Miki’s death. Keiji was acutely aware of the way time continued on without him. He felt stuck as the universe puttered on, leaving him behind.
The morning Miki died, and through the day until dusk, Keiji held vigil over her body. He had never been so vulnerable before, without a familiar and his magical brand literally severed, but that was of no concern to him. It would be a mercy if there was another attack. If a third assassin came by to finish the job. At least then he wouldn’t have to live with this impossible ache.
But his vigil went uninterrupted, and as twilight took over the forest, Keiji burned Miki’s body. The flames were black.
As the flames died, Keiji noticed a visitor: A great horned owl perched in a nearby tree, watching him.
“Surely you don’t take me as someone so fickle,” he asked. The creature tilted its head, then let out a mournful call.
Keiji hadn’t been able to shake the owl the entire week he’d been traveling.
–
He traveled at night. Keiji worked better at night as a rule. Unless circumstances forbade it, Keiji was effectively nocturnal. His eyesight was better, his magic was stronger, Miki had preferred it. With his magic weak as it was and Miki… Gone, Keiji supposed it was old habit that kept him up at night and sleeping during the day.
It was only right that the Night Witch was nocturnal.
The great horned owl didn’t keep constant surveillance over him; Keiji supposed it needed to hunt, but every night, at some point, he found himself being trailed.
“I have never heard of a witch getting a new familiar, and I am quite old. I have heard of many things.” Again, the owl just cocked its head. Keiji had the urge to roll his eyes. “You know, if you really didn’t want me to know you understood me, you wouldn’t react at all.”
The owl, of course, reacted in a way that was much too sapient for Keiji to believe it was a regular creature. Its feathers ruffled and head turned away. Keiji did roll his eyes this time, frustrated at the creeping amusement at the theatrics. Miki had her silly moments like that. She always let Keiji know when she disapproved of something he was doing or she felt like he was being stingy with treats.
The memory sobered Keiji up. He started to adjust the makeshift bandages on his arm. “Not that I wouldn’t be able to tell even if you were a good actor,” he explained despite himself. The owl appeared on a branch closer to him. “I’m weak, but not unaware. I can feel magic coming from you.”
The owl immediately started preening its feathers furiously and this time Keiji couldn’t help it, a quiet snort escaped him. He saw the owl's ear feathers twitched and it locked eyes with him.
Unlike Miki’s deep black eyes, this owl’s were an intense gold. While Miki had been a source of comfort for him, Keiji felt disarmed under his stare. He turned away first, found an imperfection in his nail beds to pick at. “I don’t want a new familiar,” he told the owl. “Miki had been by companion for centuries. I could not replace her.” There was a sad hoot, and Keiji flinched as he felt the owl land on his shoulder.
“Please,” he begged. He closed his eyes as he felt the owl start to preen though his hair, and tears slipped through the cracks, wetting his cheeks. He brought his hand up so he could wipe his eyes, and the owl pressed his cheek to Keiji’s. Keiji stilled.
The owl nuzzled his cheek, his feathers drying them. When the owl pulled back, their eyes met again. Keiji could have been projecting. Hoping. But those intense gold eyes were so earnest in their concern. If Keiji’s heart could ever heal, maybe things could have been different, but Miki was more than just his familiar or his friend. Miki was an extension of his soul. Keiji lost a part of himself and it felt heinous even thinking of replacing her. His hand trembled as he ran his fingers over the owl’s feathers.
“You’re a sweetheart, Owl-san.” His voice cracked, “But I refuse.” Gently, he pushed at Owl-san’s breast. His eyes kept that gentle concern as he flew back to his perch in a nearby tree. Keiji sighed and put his head in his hands. The warmth of the fire, which was dying, did nothing to help against the cold settling deep in Keiji’s chest.
“Even if I wanted to,” Keiji glanced at his wrapped arm. “I don’t even know if I could create a familiar bond anymore,” he murmured.
–
Despite the rejection, Keiji got a few more days with Owl-san before he left.
Owl-san kept a respectable distance, but during their time together, Keiji couldn’t help feeling the smallest bit charmed by his antics. Though as the days passed, Owl-san seemed to be getting more and more agitated. He would look around more, still for long moments, preen his wings with fervor.
“There’s somewhere else you have to be, isn’t there, Owl-san?”
Owl-san looked guilty.
“You’ve never had any issues going to hunt before.”
The owl’s horns seemed to wilt. Keiji’s brows furrowed.
“You…” A mournful hoot. “I see.” Keiji’s mouth formed a hard line. “Well, I’m standing resolute in my decision, so don’t you hesitate on my behalf.”
Owl-san took a few steps on his branch and extended his wings. His eyes looked at Keiji intently. After a moment’s thought, Keiji raised his arm, and Owl-san swooped down so he could take the perch.
“Yes?”
Talons tightened around Keiji’s forearm as Owl-San extended himself. He swayed for a moment before lurching forward and headbutting Keiji. “Ow,” he deadpanned. It shocked him more than hurt, and his mind raced with ideas with what that could mean. Owl-san, however, looked like he conveyed his point perfectly.
“I appreciate the company you have given me the past few days.” He pauses. He wants to say the Miki would have enjoyed his company too, but the words stick in his throat. Every time he thinks about her, it feels like he’s uncovering a wound and making it bleed again. “I wish you safe travels,” he manages.
Owl-san replied with a long, low Hoooooooo . His gave Keiji one more of his far too understanding looks before taking off. Keiji watched him fly into the distance, toward the rising sun. It was with regret, that Keiji realized he was already feeling lonely.
It was better this way. Truly. Miki was a perfect fit for him, made for him, even. She was there from the moment he became aware. No familiar could be better than she was. No familiar could fill the hole she left in his heart.
The next night, Keiji found himself through marked magical territory. They were safe places, away from the growing human settlements and their armies. These territories would house large flocks of magical creatures, let them go about their business without worry. They were concealed with spells or charmed to only let those with a magical signature through. Fairly recent inventions, in Keiji’s perspective, just like the human hostility toward magic. Recent, but necessary. He’s even helped create the boundaries of a few territories in his travels. The one he was in now, was vaguely familiar, tickling his sense of deja vu.
The large expanse of land could easily hold someone with enough magic to heal Keiji, and if not, they would have the supplies to keep him from losing his arm. The way was intuitive to Keiji. He had a talent for finding the right way, a talent that didn’t take much magic at all. Though, sometimes detours were unavoidable.
“Oi! Someone’s over there! We can ask them!”
“Idiot, be quiet! They could eat us, and they’ll start with you because you’re smaller.”
“Scardyama, it’ll be fine! C’mon”
Two voices caused Keiji to stop walking. Two figures were clamoring through the trees, toward him. One was much taller than the other, but still, by size and voice it was clear to Keiji that these were children.
“Excuse me!” The smaller one, with bright orange hair, called out. He held a lantern.
“May I help you?” Keiji asked. Feathers were falling from the pair, though a cursory glance around told Keiji there were no crows in the area for the feathers to belong to. If he was going to hazard a guess, he has been approached by stray shapeshifter chicks.
“We’re lost,” the smaller one admitted. His free hand twisted the hem of his shirt. The taller one stood behind, a deep scowl on his face. It might have been intimidating, if his face wasn’t so round with baby fat.
“I see. You don’t look like you should have left the nest.” Keiji hasn’t had too much chance to spend time with shifters, a stint here and there. They tended to be insular, keeping to their and a few select tribes or clans for trade and such. They were a slow maturing short, and the children in front of him seemed far from maturity. “There aren’t any humans around, but there are still many creatures that would love to have at your feathers,” he teased.
The smaller shapeshifter ducked behind his companion. “D-do you want to steal our feathers?” The taller one’s posture turned defensive.
“No,” Keiji answered flatly.
“How can we believe you?” Asked the taller one.
“Fair question. I suppose it depends on what you are.”
“Crows…” The orange one tried to puff his chest out, but his knees were trembling. Were all children so cute, Keiji wondered. The taller one managed to hold himself together much more, though it didn’t escape Keiji’s notice that his hand was firmly clasping his companion’s hand. He decided it would be too cruel to keep teasing them like this. They were lost and alone, after all.
“Ah, well then, I suppose I have no use for your feathers. I might as well help you home. I’m sure your murder is worried sick.” Keiji idly adjusted the bandage on his arm.
“Really!?” The smaller crow perked up. He jumped with excitement, exceptionally high, almost meeting Keiji at eye level.
“Yes, really,” Keiji said, taken aback. Perhaps it was an effect from being able to turn into a flying creature. One that Keiji just never noticed. “You may call me Akaashi. Come now, and hold onto my cloak if I’m moving too quickly.”
Keiji started walking in the direction of the children’s nest. He had a feeling this wouldn’t be too long of a detour.
“Nice to meet you, Akaashi-san! I’m Hinata and this is Kageyama!” Hinata, the orange one said, catching up quickly and grabbing onto the end of Keiji’s cloak. He didn’t seem to need the assistance, he seemed quite adept and quick on his feet. His other hand held Kageyama’s.
“It’s nice to meet you, Hinata-kun, Kageyama-kun.”
“How do you know where to go?” Kageyama asked.
“It’s my magic– Watch your step now, there’s a stump. The stars guide me.” Keiji had heard, that even a human could find their way with the stars. Though, when he looked up to the sky, and saw how they gleamed, he didn’t think anyone could read them like he could. Not anymore, anyway.
“Did you know that your eyes gleam like a cat’s?” Hinata asked next, his little voice filled with awe.
“Do they?”
“Yeah! Especially when you turn toward the lantern!”
“Hm. I didn’t know. I suppose it makes sense. Cat eyes glow in the dark because they reflect light so they can see better at night.” Though, privately, Akaashi felt that his eyes might be more like an owl’s.
“Gwahh! That’s so cool. Are you a cat, Akaashi-san?”
A smile snuck its way onto Keiji’s lips. “No, I’m a witch.”
Hinata jumped again, and Kageyama grunted as it made him trip up. “Woah! Tobio! We found a witch!”
“I know, heard him, Stupid. No need to shout it at me!”
The two started to squabble in earnest.
Keiji wondered for a moment if he was extremely lucky or extremely unlucky. First with Owl-san, and now these little crows, the universe deemed it fit that Keiji’s time be spent with eclectic and entertaining characters. They were a lovely, blessed distraction. The children were especially cute and novel. It wasn’t without sadness that their silly arguing brought a smile to his face. Miki would have loved Hinata’s hair.
The first of the morning stars were rising. Keiji looked to the children, and this time he paid closer attention. While Hinata chattered on, there were times when he’s have to speak around yawns, and Kageyama’s eyes had a bleary quality to them. Akaashi’s brows pinched.
“How long have you two been awake?”
“Hm?” Hinata seemed to consider the question, “Since the last sunrise, I think? Well, we took a nap under that tree, right?”
“ You took a nap under the tree. I kept watch to make sure nothing ate you.”
All day and all night. “That’s much too long for you. Perhaps we should find a safe place for you to rest,” Keiji could carry one of them at most , and it wouldn’t be for long. He could hardly move his injured arm at this point. “You managed to find yourselves terribly far from home.” The question of how stayed implied and the two crows had the good sense to look guilty.
“Well, you see, Noya-san and Tanaka-san were letting us explore the forest outside our camp! But there was this really cool beetle, and then we heard this scary noise and we had to run and we kept running and running and then we didn’t know where we were,” Hinata explained.
“We couldn’t hear the river anymore. We weren’t supposed to lose the river,” Kageyama added.
“That is. Quite the adventure.” Keiji hoped that the scary noise had been something mundane and nothing actually worth worrying about.
“It was really scary!”
Kageyama tripped again, this time over his own feet, and pulled Hinata down with him.
“It sounds terrifying. Are you alright, Kageyama-kun?”
“Yeah,” he replied, standing and dusting himself off.
“I’m okay too!” Hinata bounced back up. “Are you Tiredyama?”
“I’m fine!” Though, Keiji felt like there was still a bit more travel to go. Even if Kageyama could power through now, Keiji worried.
This was a strange feeling for him, but Keiji had only ever been able to do what he could do, which now… Was a lot less.
As he thought, and Hinata teased/doted on Kageyama, he reached his mind out to the shadows. He could feel them, his ears rang with the rustling of the leaves in the trees. The shadows shifted, responded, his arm burned, his eyes blurred. He snapped himself back into place and staggered. His breathing was labored and he felt ungrounded.
There was no way he could protect himself, let alone these two chicks. Two chicks that were looking up at him with wide, concerned eyes.
“Akaashi-san?” Kageyama asked.
“I’m quite alright. Are you both okay to walk? There’s a place we can rest, but we’ll get there right before sunrise. It’s not a long walk, but it won’t be quick,” he explained.
Hinata and Kageyama looked to each other and shared a determined nod.
“Yeah!” They shouted in unison. Keiji breathed a small sigh of relief.
“Good. Let’s go then.” He started leading the way. Hinata and Kageyama flanked him on either side. Hinata on his left, Kageyama on his right. While seemingly too shy to take his hand, Kageyama did grab his cloak.
Hinata, on his left, was on his injured side. When he grabbed Keiji’s hand, the movement made him hiss, and instinctively he pulled his arm into himself. “I’m sorry Hinata-kun, but please grab my cloak instead.” Hinata’s gaze was intense as he stared at Keiji’s arm. Something that wasn’t quite understanding seemed to puzzle together behind his young eyes. He probably hasn’t been exposed to too many serious injuries.
“Okay, Akaashi-san,” he said. His little hand grabbed Keiji’s cloaks as well.
Not long passed before, “Akaashi-san, are you sure you’re okay? Because I think you’re hurt. You’re supposed to stay in the nest if you got hurt.”
“Well it’s not like you listen to Daichi-san whenever he tells you that,” Kageyama quipped. “Or Sugawara-san, or Ukai-san, or Takeda-sa-”
“Oi! Shut up! I listen! But I’m never hurt that bad!”
“Hurt at all is bad enough! If you were less stupid you’d get hurt less.”
“Bakageyama you-!”
Keiji raised his hand in plea for the two to stop. It took a few moments but they eventually caught on. “I appreciate the concern. Yes, I’ve been injured. As soon as I can see a healer, I will get myself tended to. But before that can happen, we have to get to where we are going. I do not think arguing is going to get us there any faster. Surely, your energy could be better spent?”
“Sorry, Akaashi-san.”
“Sorry.”
“You are forgiven.” Maybe children weren’t as cute as he thought.
“But… If you are hurt, Akaashi-san…” Kageyama started.
“We’ll protect you!” Hinata finished. Their eyes were shining, and. Okay, they were still cute.
“Tobio and I are going to be the best warriors in our murder! And I’m gonna be even better than him!”
“You suck, no way you’re gonna be better than me!”
As they traveled, the world became lighter. Dawn’s light creeped, lengthening the shadows and bringing the first faded colors back into the world.
The bickering slowed as they traveled as the very long day the chicks had finally seemed to catch up with them. Even Keiji was starting to feel exhaustion tugging at his bones. Hinata had been rubbing at his eyes for fifteen minutes when they finally came across a break in the trees.
Keiji sighed when he saw the tents, and platforms up in the trees. Bridges across swaths of opensky that connect the platforms to each other and only a few ropes and ladders to get up into the canopy. There were a few stalls on the ground level. He could see groups of figures at the bases of trees and up among the many platforms. But it was the down and pellets under his feet, the distinct calls and hoots among peals of laughter, the way the stars told him he was home , that made Keiji’s heart ache and pointed him to one thing: Owl Shapeshifters.
Fate is cruel indeed.