Archive of Our Own ^beta

The last solid thing that Tony remembered happening was falling to the ground with the kid trying desperately to catch him. He remembered looking up at Peter’s red face, and wet eyes and realizing just how much the plucky, genius, spider kid meant to him and then, for a moment, nothing at all.

And then, all hell broke loose.

He was being pulled up to his feet by Strange, saying something about 2 years have passed and needing to go help. A portal opened up and instead of being on a strange new planet, he was stumbling onto the grounds of the Compound, as an all out war broke out around him. His mind was whirling, not sure exactly what he was even looking at, let alone what he should be doing.

The bleeding edge armor wasn’t quite in working order, he still had a gash in his side, the nanites not capable of covering it and several other areas, including his head. It would have to be something he’d have to improve, making sure if the nanites were needed in critical areas, they’d prioritize covering certain areas first.

But first, he’d have to make it out of his battle alive to do so.

He spotted Pepper first, in a bright blue and silver Iron Man suit, one he’d made for her recently, one she swore she’d never put on. After that the War Machine suit whizzes by, he could clock the second Rhodey saw him because he’s on the ground a moment later, helmet off and running towards him.

“Tones,” he said, in a desperate type of voice, not unlike the day he found him out in the desert. “Tones.”

He pulled Tony into a hug, a little bit of a painful one but Tony hugged back, a little confused still. Rhodey had a lot more gray hair and a beard, two things he did not have the other day. “Jesus man, I thought I’d never-”

He was cut off by a loud explosion to their left and they watched as a… well, a woman on a wing horse went flying overhead, screaming. Rhodey grimaced, looking him over. “Let’s get you out of here, I don’t think you’re fit to be in the middle of this.”

“I don’t even know what this is,” Tony replied, greatly disliking the disconnect he was feeling. “What’s going on?”

Rhodey squinted. “No one told you? Okay, that’s fine. We’re trying to stop Thanos from snapping again. We’ve got our own gauntlet this time, we’re playing a game of hot potato right now, trying to make sure Carol gets it first.”

Tony understood all of those words, but not exactly in the order in which Rhodey had just said them. “What? I was just on Titan... and where’s Peter?” he asked suddenly, his brain highlighting the forgotten kid who was definitely not with him when he went through the portal.

“Pete’s out here, doing a hell of a job fighting off the aliens.”

“Which he should definitely not be doing!” Tony exclaimed, now concerned. Another loud explosion went off, and Rhodey turned on his heels blasting away a group of aliens coming closer.

Very slowly, like his brain was full of molasses, Tony realized the extent of the situation.

They were standing in the middle of a giant battlefield, with hundreds of aliens and as time ticked on, hundreds of people fighting back. And he was standing there, in a half formed Iron Man suit, bewildered and not knowing where his kid was in all of this.

“Okay,” Rhodey said as if talking to a wild animal or a toddler, both of which Tony felt like. “Let’s get you somewhere safe and then we can talk about it.”

As if summoned by his mentor’s worry, the Iron Spider suit came to a rolling landing, a few feet from them, and the kid popped up in his view, rushing over. “Mr. Stark!” he squeaked, stupidly letting the helmet dissolve.

“Pete!” he shouted, abandoning Rhodey to run towards his kid. Meeting him halfway and they fell into a hug that was just as painful as Rhodey’s had been but he ignored it anyway. “Kid,” he said, fighting back tears. “Are you okay?”

“Am I okay?” Peter said, pulling back. Tony got a good look at him and was taken aback at the young adult standing before him. Peter wasn’t much taller, but his hair was shorter, the baby fat on his cheeks was gone and the look in his eyes was for someone far beyond the age of 16. “I’ve missed you so much,” Peter said, the same red wateriness in his eyes he’d last seen coming back.

“Missed me? Kid it’s been 10 minutes, an hour tops. I must have passed out on the…” he trailed off when Peter frowned.

“Mr. Stark, it’s been 2 years. Um, it’s a long story, time travel is real, and so is the multiverse, believe it or not, but yeah, um, I’m sure we can explain it later because right now I’ve got to help play a really intense game of keep away.”

He very much did not want Peter to leave his sight but something in the kid’s expression told him he hadn’t had a choice. “Okay,” he said, pretending to follow along. “Um, sure.”

Peter frowned again, a concerned look growing on his face. “Uh, okay, why don’t we try to find you somewhere to sit down? You’re still injured, right? Um, I’ll get Wong to take you away…”

“Jeez kid,” Tony countered. “I’m fine, I’ll be fine.”

Another explosion rocked them, Peter had grabbed his shoulders and moved him behind him, of all things. Tony was a little too shocked to do anything but stand there, as the kid’s helmet came back up and the Iron Spider legs started moving around. Peter turned around to look at him. “Just stay here, okay?”

And then he was gone again, he turned to see Rhodey had abandoned him as well. The action had moved away from him, no one was flying overhead but he could see Lang, just as big if not bigger than he was at the airport, as well as several others running away from his location.

If he had been a little more in his right state of mind, he would have been supremely annoyed at this. He was Iron Man, for god’s sake, he could handle himself in a battle just fine. Now he was forced to stay behind and watch as aliens blew up and then as Rogers, of all people, was wielding Thor’s hammer.

He was just about to jump in, ignoring the advice of the kid, when something akin to a ball of bright blue light appeared over the battlefield and everyone seemed to stop completely. He could barely see the outline of a human in the middle of the light, as it hovered over the
battlefield.

Then suddenly, a loud booming sound happened, white light erupted from the light source, flashing over the battlefield, knocking Tony back on his butt. He could only hope that was a good thing, but as he stumbled back up to his feet, the aliens around him started to turn to dust, floating away in the breeze.

The kid was flying over towards him a moment later, Iron Spider legs carrying him quickly before he landed. “We won!” he shouted, triumphantly throwing his hands in the air. “We won, Mr. Stark!”

Tony wasn’t sure what exactly they won, but he joined Peter in the celebration nonetheless.

-

Two hours later, Tony was in a hospital bed in Wakanda, still not sure what was happening. He had another joyous reunion with Pepper, this one involving more tears from both of them and a very long and well deserved kiss that left Peter making a gagging sound in the background. He had a somewhat awkward but nice reunion with Steve and Natasha, both of which hugged him, taking Tony by surprise, and he fought to pretend he was expecting it all along.

Peter left for a little bit, but then came back out of his Iron Spider suit and in pajama pants and a t-shirt, face a little bloody and beat up but otherwise looked pretty good. A few more people trickled in, Strange, Wong, Bruce, and Thor too. They all offered their happiness in seeing him again, driving home the idea Peter planted in his brain, 2 years had passed for them when it was just seconds for him.

When the parade of friends ended, it was just Pepper and Peter sitting in his room. She was douting over him, whipping away the blood he hadn’t yet, the kid squirmed a little but otherwise allowed it. He’d never seen Pepper and Peter interact, they hadn’t even met as far as he knew, but they were acting like family right now.

“Explain this to me again, like I was a child or something,” Tony said, trying very hard to grasp everything and keep it in. They gave him some of the good stuff, cleaning up the stab wound on his stomach and a few other problems. Overall, the doctors gave him a good bill of health, surprisingly.

“Okay so,” Peter started, sitting cross-legged on the chair beside him. “On Titan, the planet, we fought Thanos, right? Well, we lost, you know. Strange gave him the stone and was like oh, we can win this is the only way, blah blah. Thanos came to Earth, did some major damage and stuff, got the last two Stones, and snapped.” He punctuated the sentence with a snap of his own. “That killed like half the universe, including you. You went all dusty on me, as did Stephen and like, the rest of the Guardians. It was just me and Nebula left there, kinda scary.”

He paused as if giving Tony room to ask questions, he had many, but thought he should just hear it all again and ask questions at the end.

“Neb and I got on a ship and it was a bit dicey, I’m not going to lie. I was pretty sure I was going to die,” Tony had to swallow roughly at that thought, “but then Carol came to save me.”

“The woman with the lights?”

“Yes!” Peter said, clapping his hands together. “She’s awesome, wait till you actually meet her. She’s like the coolest person I’ve ever met.” He paused. “I mean, that’s not you,” and then he turned to Pepper, who was laughing. “Or you Pep.”

Pep? That certainly was odd to hear from the kid, but he kept going, unaware of Tony’s confusion. “Anyway, so I got back to Earth, and found Pepper and May, who hadn't been Snapped thank God. Pep let us stay at the Compound because we had nowhere else to go. Like, the world was a mess Mr. Stark, so many left homeless, so many people orphaned, it was really terrible.”

“But,” Pepper interrupted. “Spider-man did a lot of good work those first few months, really helped the people of New York make sense of what happened. You’ll be so proud, Tony, to see what our kid was out there doing.”

Peter blushed at that, shaking his head. “What else was I going to do? Anyway, we tried to like kill Thanos, or at least, the others did. I was not allowed,” he turned to glare at Pepper, “to go.”

“For good reason,” she interjected. Their conversation flowed so freely and easily, Tony couldn’t even believe it. “As I’m sure Tony would agree.”

They both looked at him and he nodded his head. “Um, yeah, no killing aliens, kiddo.”

Peter rolled his eyes. “Yeah okay, but anyway, killing him didn’t fix it. So we just kinda did nothing for a while? I mean I was working on some stuff, and so was Nat and Rocket, but there wasn’t a lot to do. We didn’t know what would help and everyone was just… like, depressed.”

“I’m sure,” Tony found himself saying. “Sounds terrible.”

“It was,” Pepper added. “We missed you so much, honey. Losing you, it was devastating. It took months for any of us to feel remotely good about anything.”

“Yeah,” Peter said, his voice taking on a somber tone. “It was a struggle, Mr. Stark. If I didn’t have Pepper and May… I dunno what would have happened.”

The room took on a very dark feel, Tony felt like he was actually dead suddenly and all he was doing was haunting them. He cleared his throat, desperate to remind them he was alive. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Pepper said. “Sorry, this is just, this is unreal. We really didn’t think we’d ever get you back again.”

“Yeah,” Peter continued. “Like, when Scott came back it was amazing, but when he suggested we use the Quantum Realm to time travel, it was like woah. It took a few of us to get it right and stuff, but eventually, we did. I feel like it would take you an hour tops.”

“To invent time travel?” Tony questioned.

“Well, kinda. It’s more like a time GPS thing. We used it to grab the stones from the past to bring them into the future. I know, I know,” Peter held up his hand. “Bad sci-fi movie plot, but for some reason, it worked. But then like Thanos from the past showed up in the future and that’s what that whole,” he waved his hands, yawning as he did so. “Fight was about.”

“If you’re tired, Pete,” Pepper said softly. “You should get some sleep. I’m pretty sure you’ve been up for at least 48 hours now.”

“I know,” he said, yawning again, looking far more tired than he had even a minute ago. “But I wanna stay up for May. Happy should be here soon.”

Tony shifted in the bed. “Come lay with me,” he said. “Take a nap, you can get up when May and Happy get here.”

“I dunno, Mr. Stark, I don’t want to hurt you…”

“You won’t, please? I know it’s been a few hours for me, but I missed you too. It would make me feel better if you took a nap.”

Despite his protests, Peter nodded, crawling into bed beside Tony. It was a little bit of a tight fit, but the kid pressed up against his side, sticking his pointy elbow directly into Tony’s spleen, but otherwise fit just nicely.

He was out like a light not two minutes later.

Pepper was smiling at him, adoringly. “I love you,” she said, Tony wasn’t sure if that was just to him or both of them. “I know this is going to be a tough adjustment, but we’ll be fine. We own the Tower again, the new owners got Snapped so I bought it right back. That’s where we’ve been living now.”

“We?”

“Ah, me, Happy, Peter, and May. It was just easier for all of us to stay together. Nat stays with us often, but she was living in the Compound. We’d get a few stray visitors here and there but it was mostly just the four of us.”

“What about SI, is it still…” he questioned, not really knowing what he wanted to ask or really hear the answer to it.

“Oh yes, in your absence I took over as owner, full stop. We worked with countries all over the world to help him during the hard times. We did a lot of good out there, it was tough without you but Peter really helped. You weren’t kidding when you said he was a genius. May and I kept telling him to test out of high school, but his friends didn’t Snap and he wanted to be with them. He graduated top of his class and he’s still the number one intern at SI. Still goes out patrolling every day, the kid really is nonstop.”

Pride swelled in Tony’s heart at the sleeping kid beside him. Peter’s face was resting on his shoulder, warm and safe. He snaked an arm under him, pulling the kid even closer. This was something he never thought he’d have or want but something felt so ridiculously safe and right. Especially with the world being so… different now, things were so strange and Tony barely knew the start of it. Having Peter and Pepper around was at least something safe and familiar.

“Who else…” Tony trailed, not really wanting to ask who else lived or died, those words getting stuck in his throat.

“Got dusted? Well, out of the Avengers, it was really only you, Strange, and the Guardians that were left on Titan, Scott, and the rest of the Pyms too.”

It was like a punch in the gut, knowing the rest of the team, original and otherwise lived on. The odds seemed too uneven, they weren't remotely in Tony's favor.

“Shuri was dusted, but T’Challa wasn’t. It was a rough time for everyone,” Pepper continued. “We all lost someone dear to us.”

It really sounded like he was the common “dear to us” among everyone. Even Peter mentioned his friends surviving being Dusted.

They chatted some more, mostly Pepper who updated him on random things, a sort of disjointed account of the last 2 years of their lives. It sounded like they made a family, with what they had left and a part of Tony felt a little jealous of it.

Which was stupid, because he was dead for 2 years and he didn’t even know about it.

-

They released him two days later after a clean bill of health and one of the wizards portaled them back to Manhattan. Pepper hadn’t been kidding when she said they bought the Tower again, the big STARK was written across the top, a beacon for all those around.

There were a lot of people outside, Tony was thankful they were delivered directly into the large, now redecorated lounge instead. He wasn’t sure if he could handle either fans or the press right now, he was still a little unsure of what to make of the new world that had sprung up in the blink of an eye.

The Parkers plus Happy (who apparently, at this point might as well be a Parker considering he’s dating the kid’s Aunt) were already up on the floor they apparently lived on. Pepper said something about gathering back together for dinner, after Tony settled himself in.

He got a tour, which was silly because he built the Tower, but things were different enough. Pepper and Rhodey took him around, explaining that the two top floors were the only residential ones, the Parkers and Happy taking over the entire floor below them, while Pepper lived alone on the top one. She had guest rooms and the way they talked about it, they seemed to have been occupied pretty often.

The thought of Pepper living alone, even if it just was an entire floor, had his heartache. He just had to keep reminding himself that she had other people, she had the Parkers and Rhodey and Happy to be there for her.

After the tour, everyone settled back into the living room and… went back to work. Because apparently, the world didn’t really stop when everyone came back. The kid had been patrolling the night before, May was due back at work tomorrow and both Happy and Pepper had already started doing work at SI.

In fact, Pepper went straight back to work the second they sat down, glancing at a tablet in her hands every few minutes and darting off to take calls. He was lucky Rhodey could stay for at least a week before he had to return back. He seemed to be, per usual, the one assigned to keeping Tony busy.

“Everyone’s happy you’re alive,” Rhodey told him, as they watched the News footage from right outside the building. Lots of people holding signs, most of them were positive, and only a few were negative. “You were the talk of the town at the press conference at the Compound.”

Tony smirked. “At least some things haven’t changed.”

“We can try to squeeze one in next week,” Pepper said, sitting next to Tony on the couch. “We can announce your return to Stark Industries, at least, if that’s what you’d like to do.”

“Yeah, of course,” Tony answered. “I mean how much can things have changed in the last 2 years?”

As it turned out, Tony discovered two hours later, the world seemed to change a lot, or at least his little circle did. Rhodey kept him up to date on a few things Pepper hadn’t, mostly what was going on with the Avengers and the Compound. Most of it went in one ear and out the other, his mind too busy circling in on the fact that yes, two years had really passed for them.

That and now Rhodey was calling a talking raccoon named Rocket, one of his closest friends.

The most unbelieve fact, however, was that May Parker suddenly had cooking skills. When the Parkers had come downstairs finally, Tony offered to order dinner instead of having someone cook. When they started naming off places, it seemed like most of them didn’t even exist anymore.

Eventually, May offered to make lasagne but no one, especially Peter, made a face. When Tony was the only one looking nervous, Peter seemed to take pity on him. “Oh, May learned how to cook. I know, I know, but uh, we didn’t have much of a choice after the Snap. Restaurants weren’t opening right away, things were crazy. So Happy spent days walking her through basic skills and now she’s amazing.”

“I didn’t even know Happy could cook,” Tony said, which just made everyone else laugh. It wasn’t a joke, he shook his head, hating the unfamiliar feeling of not being the one in on the joke.

As they all sat around the table, talking like a family, he was struck with yet another difference. The people in front of him, his closest friends, the ones he loved the most, made a family without him. They didn’t all go their separate ways, they all stayed together and from the looks of it, they all got along.

The conversation was easy, flowing through each of them, like this was the new normal. Which, Tony realized, was.

Happy was telling some story about how several old employees just wandered into SI this morning, back from being Dusted and majorly confused about their job statuses. Tony wanted to interject, but Pepper beat him to it, talking about how they are working on giving people temporary positions until something more permanent could be arranged. A part of him was a bit annoyed that this wasn’t brought to his attention but… he really had no idea what was going on with SI at the moment. He probably would have had to get Pepper himself.

May started talking about work, how she was hoping Spidey could make an appearance to drum up more support. His confused face must have been pretty obvious because once May looked at him, she laughed. “I’m the head coordinator for FEAST,” she replied. “We’ve had Peter come by every once in a while to get people interested in donating and working with us. Now that we’ve got a lot more people to help, it might be time for another fundraiser.”

“I could come,” Tony interjected. “I mean, who wouldn’t want to see the Iron Man armor up close?”

“That’s nice, Tony,” May said, softly shaking her head. “But I think it might be a little more than we can handle. Pep already donates a decent amount to keep us running, that’s more than enough.”

“And I can bring over some more items for the auction,” Rhodey jumped in. “I can rummage through Avengers storage and find some stuff for everyone to autograph.”

“Thank you,” May said and the conversation moved on swiftly, leaving Tony on unsure footing.

“Mr. Stark?” Peter questioned, nudging him with his elbow from the right. “You okay?”

“Yeah, Pete,” he said, then. “You know, I think you can start calling me Tony now. You seem to be on a first name basis with everyone else.”

Peter grinned, looking just as young as he used to. “Yeah, but it doesn’t annoy everyone as much as it annoys you.”

Tony grinned, at least some things had stayed the same.

-

The next day Peter showed him to the lab he’d been working in during Tony’s absence. It was, not to Tony’s surprise, the one he’d worked in the most when he lived at the Tower. The space had changed, there wasn’t a wall of Iron Man suits, in fact, there was very little left of Tony in there, except for to his surprise, Dum-E and U.

Both started to go off the second they saw him, mechanical twirls and chirps, rushing towards him faster than he’d ever seen them go before.

“Wow,” he said, having to dodge Dum-E’s arm to his face as he waved it around. “You kept ‘um.”

“Of course,” Peter answered. “And I may have updated them a little? Just like, fixed some things, but nothing major. I just always wanted to have them around.”

“That’s great kid,” he said, batting away Dum-E’s excited little arm. Peter showed him around the lab, technology had changed over the years, but there was something so safe and familiar being there. He might not know everything just yet, but the lab had always felt like home, always felt like a place Tony could navigate seamlessly.

“You can have any spot you want,” Peter said with a shrug, gesturing towards the three different holodeck tables in the room. “I mean, it’s technically yours, I was just borrowing it anyway.”

“Whatever you want Pete,” he said, going over to one of the less crowded tables, it was clear the kid was using all three of them at some point. There were blueprints for some kind of spider shaped drone scattered everywhere. He started looking at them when he noticed Peter was awkwardly hovering to his right.

Even 2 years older, Peter had some pretty easy tells.

“Uh,” Peter said, clearing his throat. “I also, um, well, kept up general maintenance for your Iron Man suits? I mean, like I didn’t use them or anything. Rescue was the only one I spent time really working on.”

“Rescue?” Tony questioned, looking over at the kid, he’d never really named his suits anything Mark I or something official sounding.

“Oh uh, Pepper’s suit. I found it when we were uh, going through your things and she wanted to keep it up and running. I think we were all a little worried, about the Earth not having its mightiest defender anymore. But since you had your newest model with you, I just kinda worked on the older ones? They are in the vault thing downstairs if you want to look at them. I promise I didn’t like paint any blue or like, mess up your coding. Just kept them updated, FRIDAY too.”

He’d gotten reacquainted with FRIDAY the day before, happy to see she was up and working. There were a few bugs he noticed, some stuff he would have to fix but Peter, who he had assumed did it, had done a great job. It was impressive just how easily he seemed to fit into the void Tony had left, how the kid just picked up his tech like it was nothing and seamlessly put his own spin on it.

However, he learned, nobody really used her anyways. Peter seemed to be the only one, occasionally Pepper would ask questions but it was nothing like it used to be. He relied on FRIDAY for everything, JARVIS before that. FRIDAY just seemed to have become a small relic of the past for them, relegated to answering tech questions, a glorified search engine.

He wasn’t mad about it, or anything. The fact that Peter kept up with it, and tried to keep FRIDAY going was commendable. And it wasn’t like ripped him from the walls, he was still there, a silent protector.

“Pete,” he said with a smile, coming over and putting his hand on the kid's shoulder. “Breath for a second. I’m not mad you were updating my suits. I’m glad you were able to get Rescue up and going for Pep. You did a great job, I’m sure all of it works fine and when you’ve got time, you can help me fix the bleeding edge armor too.”

“Oh,” Peter said, looking less nervous. “Good. I was worried you’d be upset with me and yeah, totally. I had to fix the Iron Spider suit so many times, I’ve gotten pretty good with nanites, to be honest.”

“Oh,” Tony echoed him, a little surprised. He’d barely started using nanites himself. The Iron Spider suit was a prototype only intended to be used in cases of emergency. “Maybe you can show me what you’ve got.”

Snorting, the kid grinned. “I’m sure you’ll catch up again real quick.”

Tony wasn’t so sure about it.

-

The press conference they held felt so different. Everyone was happy to see Tony alive and well but… it just wasn’t the same. Most of the questions were about what Tony’s role was going to be going forward and then more importantly, what was SI doing to help the newly returned. There were maybe 2 questions Tony could even answer, neither of which seemed all that important in the grand scheme of things.

Most of the time Tony felt like he was in a play, no one gave him the script or directions for. Everyone else knew what they were doing, they all talked and moved around each other with such practiced ease. And Tony, he was just bumbling around, trying to fit in, say the right thing, know the right answer but it never seemed to work out.

Everyone was happy to see him, they all treated him like they missed him, no one excluded him, in fact, they very much made an effort to include him. And sometimes that made it so much worse for him, because they wanted his opinion on something he just didn’t understand the context to. Or they made a joke or comment about something Tony wasn’t even there for and when he didn’t laugh, everyone looked a little bit sadder.

Before he knew it, everyone returned back to their normal lives and he just sort of drifted around. He’d follow Pepper to SI sometimes, shadowing her a little until he could get back in the groove of his company. Other times he’d just hang out in the lab, going over the extensive notes the kid had made. Or sometimes he’d do nothing at all, sit in the lounge, pretending to watch TV or read about another event he didn’t even know happened.

He wasn’t completely isolated from the worlds around him, the other Avengers came by to see him often enough. He caught up with Rhodey, Steve, Natasha, and Bruce but none of them wanted to talk about the fact that Tony was Dusted.

The subject was avoided at all costs, like if everyone just ignored it, then maybe it didn’t happen.

But the thing was, it did happen and Tony remembered it. Well, not the turning to dust and nothing of his 2 missing years, but he remembered being on Titan, he remembered Thanos, he remembered the disorientation of waking up in a new world. He was no stranger to nightmares, they were a normal occurrence but they were plagued by a new fear.

Watching everyone else turn to dust while he didn’t.

It was a constant thought. What would have happened if he lost Peter? Or Pepper? Or Happy? Rhodey? Anyone he cared about, gone in a snap of fingers. Would he have moved on like everyone else did? How would he have handled it? Could he even do it?

He’d been lounging, maybe mopping just a little, watching some TV show he’d never heard of when an alarm inside the house went off. It scared him, enough that he nearly fell off the couch but was up on his feet a second later.

“FRI, talk to me.”

“There is a Threat Level Charlie happening in Manhattan.”

“Okay,” Tony said, trying to remember any military information Rhodey had passed along. “That’s… bad right?”

“Yes, sir. But there are several Avengers already there. The threat has moved up from a level Delta, several minutes ago.”

“Wait, what?” Tony asked, grabbing his remote and trying to find a news channel. It didn’t take long for him to find something. There were several large circular portals, not unlike the ones Strange used, spilling out monstrous looking creatures.

“Thanos?” he found himself saying, in a voice that really didn’t belong to him.

“It doesn’t appear so sir. The culprit has been identified but the information is classified.”

That took him out of his stupor. “I’m sorry, what? Classified from who exactly?”

“Anyone without Gold Level Clearance,” FRI answered him and Tony actually blanched at that.

“What is my clearance, FRI? I have unlimited gold sparkling diamond red ultra clearance. I’m the one who created the clearance!”

“Sir,” FRIDAY said and for a second Tony thought she sounded impatient. “Your clearance level was deleted after you were Dusted. You were added back to Gold Clearance within the Tower, however, you no longer obtain any clearance for Avengers. You only received the alert because you are currently in the Tower and the battle has hit my proximity radar.”

Tony sat down, heavily.

They kicked him out of his own club, didn’t they?

“Get me a suit,” he said, if they weren’t going to invite him, he was just going to crash the party anyway. The TV played on, showing Sam, Bucky, and Steve jumping and flying around, fighting whatever these creatures were. And then, swooping in, was Spider-man, just barely visible in the corner of the screen.

“You are not permitted to summon a suit, sir.”

Tony’s head swam as he watched Spider-man swing across the TV screen, taking out an alien with ease.

“Try again,” Tony said, his voice betraying him. He wasn’t going to be upset about this, it wasn’t worth it, what he needed was to be out there helping.

“I’m sorry sir, your clearance has not been initiated for use of the suits.”

“Call Pepper,” he demanded, FRI attempted to connect but it went straight to her voicemail. “Goddammit.”

He watched as the camera started following Spider-man around, as the kid webbed up as many of the creatures as he could. “Call Pete.”

“Peter is currently out of contact, he has initiated the Don’t Text & Fight Protocols,” FRIDAY answered. Tony frowned, he didn’t remember that one, it must have been one of the many new ones Peter said he’d installed over the last 2 years. He might as well know nothing about the technology he built with his own hands.

He had a moment of wanting to get to the suits anyways, force himself inside but would they even listen to him? If he couldn’t access them then who could? Pepper? Peter? Happy? None of them were anywhere near or answering their phones, to begin with.

He never felt more helpless in his life.

“Call Happy,” he said, trying to remember where he was supposed to be today. He knew Happy sometimes went with May to FEAST, or stayed downstairs. The call rang, before hitting Happy’s voice mail and Tony instructed FRIDAY to hang up. “Can you track him?”

“I’m sorry, sir, but you do not have tracking privileges.”

That hurt, that hurt a lot. How was he supposed to know what was happening if he wasn’t allowed to track anyone? Could they even see him? What if something happened to the Tower, would they even have warned him?

“Call May,” he tried, feeling desperate. He knew May was at work, so maybe she didn’t even know about anything happening. But she would be the next person on his list to call, for all he knew she had access to his suits.

She finally picked up, not sounding frantic, or even upset. “Tony?”

“Hey, uh do you know what’s happening?” Tony asked.

“Oh yes,” she said simply and then. “Oh no, we didn’t add you to the new protocols did we?”

Tony watched as a creature managed to hit Spider-man, sending his kid crashing into the ground. He wanted nothing more than to see the kid’s vitals, to know if he was okay but Spidey got back up a second later and ran back into the fight.

“What protocols? And no, I just got the alert about the fight a few minutes ago. Where are you? Do you know where Pep is? I can’t get a hold of her. I can’t even get a goddamn suit to even take me to the fight.”

“That’s, oh Tony, I’m so sorry. I don’t think we even thought about fixing things so soon. We’re all at the Compound right now, Pepper too. This is what we do, we all head down to the Compound while the fight is happening and wait here. If you give me a minute, I’ll talk to Happy, I’m sure he can come get you.”

What Tony noticed right away, was the fact that May didn’t suggest he go into battle. Instead, she assumed he was just going to come to the Compound and wait around. But that’s not what he wanted, he wanted to be Iron Man again. He wanted to fly in and help, not be delegated to sit in the bleachers.

But what was he gonna do about it? He was already feeling pretty defeated, just standing there, the thought of actually having to ask someone to let him in his own suit, was just going to make it so much worse.

“I can drive myself,” he said, trying to sound casual and not hurt at all. “It’ll be fine.”

He hung up shortly after, May assuring him that things would be fine and that once Pepper was available she’d call him. This was not what Tony was used to, this was completely different from the world Tony was from. He knew, logically, that the Avengers had moved on without him, but he had no idea what it felt like not to be part of the time anymore.

Heading down to the parking lot, he picked out one of his least suspicious cars. “FRI,” he asked, once he was inside. “Keep me updated as much,” he paused, sighing. “As much as you can regarding the fight. If Peter needs help or gets hurt, tell me immediately.”

“Yes, sir,” FRIDAY responded.

-

The Compound had taken a lot of damage in the fight with Thanos, but it seemed like most of the buildings were still intact. When Tony pulled up to the gates, he was surprised to see very little construction and almost all the buildings back to normal, if not upgraded. Tony hadn’t been back since the battle, no one mentioned him coming by or really even asked him for help. Truth be told, he wasn’t really even thinking about it either, his mind too busy being focused on his life back at the Tower. Which was maybe his mistake, really. If he’d been a bit more interested in everything at the Compound, he might not have been left in the dark about the Avengers.

He had to get buzzed in at the gate, the code he tried didn’t work but thankfully Pepper saw him coming and was waiting for him when he pulled up. She ran to him, hugging him the second she could.

“I’m so sorry,” he said. “I wasn’t thinking, this was my fault. When I got the call, I just dropped everything to come here. It’s just what I’m so used to and I just, I’m so sorry.”

“Hey, it’s fine,” he insisted, even though it wasn’t. “Everything's good, right? FRI said everyone’s heading back here now?”

“Yes, a few minor injuries here and there, but Stephen and Wong were able to stop the wizard from bringing in any more creatures and close up the remaining portals.”

His heart lurched a little, did they actually invite Strange to the party and not him? Strange was gone for 2 years too and they managed to loop him in. Feeling oddly numb, he just nodded, allowing Pepper to bring him inside. He offered polite smiles to May and Happy, along with anyone else that greeted him.

It didn’t take long for everyone to arrive back, Strange and Wong had portalled everyone through. Peter was one of the last ones, walking back and immediately taking off his mask.

“Hey,” Tony called out, walking around a few people until he was in front of Peter. The kid had a few scraps and bruises on his face, nothing looked too bad. “You okay?”

“Oh hey, Tony,” Peter said cheerfully. “I’m good!”

“Are you?” Tony asked. “I saw you take a hit.”

“Oh yeah, I’m totally fine. Sorry to cut this short, but I’ve gotta go change and get to the debrief. Steve likes it when we're there like right away, the whole thing is fresh in our minds. I’ll find you after?”

“Shouldn’t you be going to the medbay?” Tony asked, a little confused as to why May wasn’t running up here too.

“Oh, no, I’m good, for real.”

Tony was used to this, the kid always tried to downplay things but something always gave it away. But now? There was nothing. He was pretty confident, he didn’t seem to be lying and Tony felt really out of his place.

“Pete!” May said from somewhere behind him. Tony moved out of the way, watching as May, Happy, and then Pepper, came up and hugged him, despite the dirt, grime, and blood. Tony stepped to the side, watched as the small group made sure he was okay, and then smiled as Peter took off past them.

Happy caught Tony’s worried face. “He’s fine,” he said with a shrug. “Kid doesn’t lie about injuries anymore.”

“That much,” May added with a laugh. “I mean, he downplays things sometimes, but he knows better now.”

Tony wanted to ask how Peter learned his lesson but didn’t really get the chance, because Pepper was already changing subjects.

“Did you eat yet?” Pepper asked him and it took Tony a second to come back down from Earth. The lack of worry in everyone’s attitudes was sort of alarming to him. No one seemed to act like that recent Avengers level threat was anything more than a fistfight outside a club.

“Oh, uh, no?”

“Good. After a battle like this, we usually end up with more food than humanly possible. Give the team about an hour and we should be ready.”

She didn’t give Tony a thing to do, or a place to go, so all he could do was nod. “I’m going to head up to the lab, get myself on the clearance list for Avenger threat.”

“Oh yeah,” Pepper said. “Good idea, you should be able to do it yourself but if not, let me know. You might need my code.”

Tony had never felt so dumb in his life. This was… he made this. He designed all of us and yet, Pepper was treating him like he didn’t know how to open a PDF. He had to shake his head and recalibrate because Pepper loved him, she wouldn’t be doing this on purpose. Two years is a long time and she thought he was dead forever, of course, she’ll do the smart thing and remove him from all security databases.

“Sure, of course,” Tony responded, forcing a casual nature to his tone. Pepper seemed to notice something, she looked concerned but Tony cut her off before she could say anything. “It’s all good, seriously, Pep. Don’t worry about anything, I’ll call if I need you.”

There was something else he wanted to do, something that would settle the unhappy feeling in his gut. He hovered around the debriefing room, hoping to catch Steve before he went in. Sure enough, a minute later, Steve dressed in his civilian clothing already, came down the hall.

“Hey,” Tony called out, Steve gave him a warm smile. He still had some… feelings about the man, but he had more important things to worry about.

“Oh hey, Tony. You don’t have to worry about coming to the debrief or anything, it’ll be a quick one.”

Tony chose to ignore how that made him feel. “Yeah no, don’t want to, just wanted to let you know I’m adding myself back into the system, so Iron Man will be available next time the Avengers are needed.”

Steve’s face betrayed him immediately, he frowned and Tony tried not to get angry. “Oh, uh, I mean, I’m glad you’ll be back in the system to get notified, but I don’t know if it’s the right time for Iron Man to come back.”

“And why not?” Tony questioned.

“Because we’ve got a different team out there right now, you aren’t… you don’t know the dynamics and I’m saying this to everyone too, everyone else who Dusted. I want everyone to get back into the groove together. Just throwing you out there, Tony, it’s good for no one.”

“I’m not rusty,” Tony defended. “I don’t even remember being gone for two years, I’m just as ready and capable as I was two years ago.”

“And I agree with you,” Steve said defensively, but he wasn’t angry. This wasn’t like the arguments they’d had in the past. He wasn’t as combative, it sounded like he truly didn’t want an argument. “But I have to think about what’s best for our team right now. We’re all a little… it's been rough for all of us Tony. You were missed, there was a giant Tony Stark shaped void in the world and we struggled to fill it. Two years is a long time to make adjustments, you can’t expect us to just jump back into line now that you’re back. I want you on the team, everyone else does too but let’s take the time to get it right. I don’t want another,” he paused, sighing. “I don’t want another situation to break us so easily.”

Tony found himself suddenly at a loss for a counterargument. What Steve said was valid but at the same time, he was Iron Man. This was his team and to keep him out, and make him start over again seemed like a smack in the face. None of what happened was his fault, he’d tried to warn them all those years ago and in the end, he was the one that suffered. He was the one who lost two years of his life without even knowing it.

But the sound of footsteps coming from down the hall broke him out of his trance. “Yeah fine,” he said and walked away, as Steve was still calling out his name.

-

Putting himself back in the system was easy, as was getting all the alerts sent to him as well. Too bad it wasn’t that easy to just walk straight back into the team. He’d had a little time to think about Steve’s little speech and very begrudgingly, he found himself agreeing, just a little. But he still thought they should make a bigger effort to let him back in. Didn’t they understand that he didn't feel the last two years gone by? He closed his eyes being an Avenger and opened them up a ghost, a relic of the past, a memory.

Joining the team down in the living area for dinner felt marginally like old times. Everyone had plates piled high with food, spread out amongst the couches and tables. He easily spotted Peter, sitting in one of the armchairs, a plate full of food on his lap.

He was talking to Thor, who in turn had placed his hammer on the floor between them. It had reminded Tony so much of a time before, it took a second to realize that was years ago. Just like he had then, he walked over, eyeing the hammer’s handle.

“Want to find out if you’re worthy kiddo?” Tony asked casually, sitting on the arm of the chair.

“Oh,” Peter said. “Um, well, actually…”

“I know he’s worthy!” Thor boasted, jovially, so loudly that the group closest to them turned to look. “He’s already lifted the hammer.”

Tony was struck with an odd mixture of being surprised and not being surprised at all. Instead, he looked around at the group, all of which looked a little sheepish. Tony couldn’t help but feel like he missed something else.

“He’s what?” Tony asked, a little breathlessly, looking back to Peter who was flushed red.

“Um, we were uh, there were these alien people who tried to invade us because they thought we were weak,” Peter began to explain, the small group around them were all listening too as if they probably hadn’t been there for it. “Long story short, I kinda picked up the hammer without realizing it was a big deal.”

“Peter,” Thor interrupted. “Is selling himself short yet again. He was a fine warrior and without him, we never would have defeated the aliens! He lifted Mjolnir with ease and I’m proud to have him as a worthy son of Asgard.”

“Yeah,” Steve echoed from Tony’s right. “It was just him tho, last time I checked I just made it budge a little.”

“Same,” Nat said, and then voices came back to full swing as the rest of them rambled on about who was worthy and who wasn’t. Tony’s attention, however, was still on Peter and the hammer.
How much had he really missed?

Peter was looking nervous like he expected Tony to actually be mad about something. It reminded him of the Peter he last saw two years ago, a little timid and unsure.

“That’s great,” Tony said, finally finding his voice. “I knew you’d have it in you, kiddo.”

Peter beamed at the praise, the tips of his ears turning bright red. “Thanks, it was um, interesting but overall, good to know in case I ever needed to in an emergency.”

“Or if you ever needed to take over the Asgardian throne,” Thor threw in, with an exaggerated wink.

“I told you,” Peter said in a fake annoyance tone. “May said I can’t take over any thrones until I’m at least 21.”

Tony found himself a little lost in the conversation, Thor and Peter easily bantered back and forth. They did leave room for him, talking to him, inviting him in, but Tony had clearly missed a lot of things.

After the food was finished, everyone dispersed to their rooms, but Tony declined, instead going back into the lab. He was suddenly hellbent on reading everything he could about the missions over the last two years. He needed to know what else he was missing, things no one really thought to tell him.

If anyone asked, which no one had, he was going to say he needed to make sure he knew what type of enemies came for them, just in case. What he did find was a wealth of stories and clips into a life he could have been in. The team was strong, it was good and Peter truly proved himself in every situation he found himself in. The kid seemed to keep his head up, helping the Avengers anytime he was needed.

Erath was a hot spot for a while, it seemed. Aliens thought they'd be weakened by Thanos and some were angry the stones fell because they couldn't stop them. That didn't include the threats that came from Erath either, the villains who thought they could take over too. Apparently, Peter even had to call in to help him fight a guy who turned himself into a giant Lizard at some point.

When he finished, he still wasn’t satisfied. “FRI, does Karen still log all of Peter’s patrols?”

“Yes, sir,” FRIDAY answered him.

“Can you have those summarized and sent to me?”

“Happy, Pepper and May already received a summarized version of Peter’s patrols. Would you like me to request access to those programs?

“Uh,” he said, then cleared his throat, of course, they got these reports. They were the ones taking care of Peter when he couldn’t. “Yes, if you don’t mind.”

Apparently, it wasn’t an immediate thing because he still hadn’t gained access and after 10 minutes of waiting, he decided to head to bed. When he walked into the bedroom, Pepper was still up, sitting against the headboard with a book in her hand.

“I was wondering when you’d come to bed,” she greeted.

“You didn’t have to stay up for me,” Tony said, getting out of his day clothes and into his pajamas.

“I know,” she said softly. “I saw you requested access to Peter’s patrol logs. I can grant you access, but I just want to make sure you know that he’s okay now. No matter what happened to him, he handled it and he’s fine.”

“You say that like I’m going to freak out once I read them,” Tony said, getting into bed. Pepper put her book down and ran her fingers over the lamp’s base, turning it off.

“You might,” she said. “Nothing too bad, but I don’t want you to… worry about it. It’s all in the past, there’s nothing you could do now, you know? I don’t want you to stress about it.”

Tony snorted but leaned over and kissed her gently. “I’m always going to stress about my kid, Pep. Even more so knowing he’s out there superheroing without me.”

“He wasn’t alone, Tony. We all looked out for him and took care of him.”

And Tony knew that it was pretty obvious, so he shrugged. “I know, I know.”

Even in the dark of the room, Pepper was close enough for Tony to see her face. She smiled at him, the same smile he knew and had fallen in love with so many years ago. It settled a little something in his heart, knowing that Pepper was just as lovely then as she is now and from the look on her face, her love for him hadn’t changed either.

-

“So,” Tony said, sitting at the kitchen counter as Pepper cooked breakfast. She had an inhumane amount of eggs cooking, along with bacon, sausage, and the waffle maker full of batter. He assumed it was for Peter, he knew the kid needed to eat. “I was thinking-”

“Dangerous,” Pepper jumped in with.

Tony ignored her. “Are we still, you know, engaged?”

She turned around, frowning, and then looked down at her hand. Tony had noticed it pretty much right away, she just didn’t wear her engagement ring anymore. Tony tried to look for it a few weeks ago, but he didn’t even see it in her jewelry box. He wasn't upset about it, she thought he was dead for 2 years, so it was understandable that she’d move on.

Even though no one had mentioned it yet if she did.

“Why wouldn’t we be?” she questioned and then as if she’d only thought about it now, looked at her hand. “Oh! The ring! I… I wore it for a long time after the Snap happened but eventually, it just felt like too much. I’ll start wearing it again.”

“It’s fine,” Tony said with a smile. “I figured that much. I just uh, you know, if you want to do that, I was thinking we can have the wedding sooner rather than later. I know we didn’t really have a lot of it planned and you wanted something big, but I think it’d be nice to know… have a small thing.”

Pepper smiled, walking her way around the counter, to stand next to him. She reached her arms around his shoulder and placed her forehead on his. “Sounds wonderful.”

Just as their lips touched, they were interrupted by the sound of fake gagging. “Ugh, really? And you’re burning my eggs too.”

Pepper laughed, kissed Tony quickly, and pulled away as Peter walked over. “There’s a rule in this house and it’s not PDA.”

Pepper laughed as she went back to the eggs again, turning off the heat. “Come get your own breakfast boys and you’re one to talk, Peter. Exactly how many times have I walked in on you and MJ sitting 5 feet apart on the couch but bright red?”

Peter’s face flushed but he got up, grabbing the plate from the counter. “Yeah, but you saw nothing.”

“Just because you’re Peter tingle alerts you to being caught doesn’t mean you weren’t making out on my couch.”

“Uh,” Tony said, breaking into their banner. “Who is MJ?”

Both Peter and Pepper turned to him, the kid’s face even more red now. “Uhhh,” he said. “She’s my um, girlfriend.”

That made Tony frown, not just because his baby spider had a girlfriend but because it’s been nearly 3 months and this is the first he’s heard of her.

“They are adorable,” Pepper jumped in with a laugh. “In fact, I noticed you haven’t had MJ around nearly as much as usual.”

“Yeah, she’s been busy. We had a date night last week but I haven’t seen her since. I thought she might come by tomorrow though. So I guess, uh, you can meet her then?”

“Yeah, sure, totally, I would love to meet the girl who stole your heart. How long have you been, uh, together?”

“Um, almost a year and a half? I think?”

“The story is so sweet,” Pepper said, going to get her own plate of food. “Come eat Tony.”

Tony got up a little numbly, grabbed a plate, and started to get breakfast.

“It’s not cute, Pep,” Peter said dead seriously. “It was normal and boring.”

Pepper laughed, as Tony stood beside her, desperately wishing he was in on the whole thing.

“What happened?” Tony asked.

Peter sat at the counter, shoving food into his mouth. “I was fighting this annoying bad guy and he figured out who I was,” Peter paused, making sure to look at Tony. “It’s fine, he’s uh dead but that’s a different story.”

“I don’t know how cute the story about how you asked your girlfriend out starts with a bad guy who knows your identity but is now dead.”

“The story gets better,” Pepper jumped in, coming to sit next to Peter, leaving Tony alone on the other side of the counter, a plate of food still in his hand, stomach no longer hungry.

“Anyway, he attacked Midtown and I was trying to go without giving away my identity anymore, but then MJ was all, I know you’re Spider-man-”

“There are way too many people who know your secret identity.”

“I mean, I would have to tell her if we were just dating, it wouldn't be fair but yeah, she figured it out and I already liked her anyway and she was all worried that I was going to die or something, so she kissed me right before I ran off to save the day.”

“That’s… kinda cute?” Tony offered, not feeling like it was cute at all. “But you did? Save the day?”

“Of course,” Peter scoffed. “I handled it but thankfully Nat and Rhodey were in town and came to help clean up the little mess I was making. The guy was like, made of molten lava and had a grudge for some reason. He set fire to a lot of the school, but there were no casualties or anything, and afterward, MJ and I kinda just dated? I dunno, we really didn’t talk about it, but it happened.”

Tony had a lot more questions but kept his mouth shut, nothing he had to say would add to anything. This happened a year and a half ago and now, more than ever, he wanted to watch all of Peter’s patrols and read the logs. If the kid wasn’t planning on telling him about these major events, then Tony needed to know about them.

“Cute,” Tony settled on answering. “Any other couples I need to know about? Ned dating anyone? Steve? Are Bruce and Nat finally a couple?”

“Oh,” Pepper said as if she just remembered something else.

“Really? Nat and Bruce? I know they were flirt city but I figured it wouldn’t last very long..”

“Not them,” Peter said, frowning. “They are both single as far as I know? But um, do you know about Rhodey?”

Tony’s heart dropped, his own best friend didn’t even bother to tell him about his love life. “N-no.”

“He’s kinda dating Carol Danvers. I mean, they were dating last time I saw him but they’ve been on and off for a bit now so they might not be. She doesn’t live on Earth so that’s like an insanely long distance so they might be broken up now, I dunno. Sorry, uh, no one told you. I mean like, it’s hard to remember things that you don't know about because they are things we just kinda… know? I’m sorry.”

Peter said his whole statement in one single breath, impressive but Tony could tell he was worrying about him too much. Tony wouldn't let his kid stress out about things like this, it wasn’t his fault Tony was just behind on things.

“Hey, don’t worry about it. I’m just surprised that’s all, no harm. If she’s coming over tomorrow, let’s have a family dinner?” Tony asked, hopeful that was something they actually did.

“Yeah, sure, that’d be nice,” Peter answered, then shoved the rest of his plate into his face, almost alarmingly so. “Gotta go,” he swallowed and brought his plate to the sink, before dashing out of the room.

“You get used to it,” Pepper said, eating her own breakfast much more slowly. “He’s like the Tasmanian devil around here sometimes, always on the move.”

“Yeah,” Tony said, finally going to eat his food.

“But I like the idea,” Pepper offered. “Of a nice small wedding, maybe at the Compound even, they seem to be getting it together again pretty quickly.”

“Yeah,” Tony echoed, not feeling all that hungry anymore but giving Pepper his best smile anyway.

-

Michelle Jones, as she introduced herself, was interesting. He could see how completely in love Peter was with her, within seconds of seeing the two of them together. She seemed just as smitten with him, as well as friendly enough with May, Happy, and Pepper too. With him, however, she seemed to be a little more judgemental.

Tony just smiled, listened to her, and made as much pleasant small talk as he could.

Dinner was from a restaurant Tony had never tried before, one that popped up during the two years he was gone. Peter had talked about it often, claiming it had the very best tacos he’d ever had. They’d ordered a variety of foods, Tony was unsure what Michelle ate and then, of course, he needed to feed his spider-kid.

“Oh MJ,” May said, as they settled down, plates full of food. “How did the interview at the Future Fondation go? I asked Peter but you know how he answers things.”

Peter looked offended but didn't say anything.

Tony had heard of the Future Foundation, it seemed to pop up in the void of other companies. He knew they dealt in technologies, but hadn’t looked into them that much. He was still trying to stay with what his own company had done in his absence.

“Good,” she answered. “They had a lot of applicants but I’m hoping for the best. If I don’t get in there, I’ll try a few other places. I really just want something for college applications next year.”

That was another thing that seriously messed up Tony’s equilibrium. It had been June when he turned to dust, but it was now late October. Not only that, but Peter had already graduated High School and apparently, had chosen to take a gap year before college. No one had explained to him why just yet and it was a thought that nagged him a little.

“Why don’t you apply at SI?” Tony asked her. “I’m sure we can bring you in.”

Michelle just stared at him for a minute. “Because,” she said, gesturing towards Peter. “He works there and I’m not being treated like I got in for that reason alone. I want to earn my spot.”

Tony opened his mouth to object, but Peter beat him to it. “No one would think that Em and if they did I would yell at them.”

“That’s the problem,” Michelle told him. “Then everyone would for sure think that you got me here. I’d rather do it on my own and if I don’t get one, then I don’t.”

“You have enough credits to get into MIT,” Pepper offered her. “Without an internship, MJ. I do not doubt that the three of you will be in Cambridge this time next year.”

“Oh yeah,” Tony echoed. “You guys are perfect for MIT.”

“Don’t pull strings,” Peter insisted. “So many people keep threatening to strong arm any college that doesn’t let me in and I don’t think I can handle it. Bruce wrote me a letter of recommendation and I don’t even want to use that.”

“Why not?” Tony asked. “I’m going to write you a letter of recommendation.”

Peter sighed, loudly, but everyone else just laughed.

“Peter doesn’t like the attention,” May supplied. “He got a lot of it the second the rest of the team found out he was an itty bitty teenager. He’s got all of them wrapped around his finger.”

“Maaay,” Peter whined into his burrito. “Can you please? I don’t do it on purpose.”

“Why the gap year?” Tony found himself asking, stealing the attention in the room. “For all three of you, right? Ned too?”

It was silent, enough so that Tony started to think he missed something incredibly big. After a second, Peter sighed, pushing his rice around with his fork, and addressed mostly his plate of food. “Dunno, it just didn’t feel right going to college when things were still all,” he waved his other hand, “messed up. I wanted to stick around here too, make sure everyone was okay.”

“Just more of his self-sacrificial streak,” Michelle continued. “He knew Ned and I couldn’t go, not when both of our moms had Dusted too. So instead of just going on his own, he wanted to wait for us too.”

“And,” Happy jumped in. “He spent too much time worrying about Pep and May too. And patrolling in Queens.”

This seemed like a conversation that had worn itself out, especially with the look on Peter’s face. Tony felt bad for even asking.

“That’s alright,” Tony said. “Gap years are fine, everyone does it. And now you have more time to spice up your application. Maybe we can even focus on a few things at SI that could help.”

Pepper and May were giving him looks, but Tony didn’t really know why. The kid had every right to take a gap year. But Peter finally looked up and smiled. “Thanks, Tony.”

And dinner moved on from there, barrelling right past anymore awkwardness. Michelle seemed to lighten up to him a little and at the end of the night, she offered him a, “You can call me MJ,” before leaving which made Peter beam with happiness. They all retired for the night, but something was still bothering Tony just a bit.

Feeling restless, he found himself wandering back down his lab after going to bed and wasn't surprised to see Peter leaning over a pair of web shooters.

“Hey, kid.”

“Hey,” he echoed back, not looking up.

Tony came over, leaning against the lab table. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” Peter answered, laser focused on the task at hand. Tony let him have his space, he didn’t say anything else but he just stood on the side, trying not to crowd him too much. After a few minutes, Peter put down the web shooter and looked up. “Sorry, the whole gap year thing was… a big deal. I don’t think Pep and May are really over it yet.”

“Can you tell me why? The real reason, kiddo, not the rehearsed reason from dinner.”

“That is part of the real reason,” Peter answered him. “I didn’t want to leave MJ and Ned behind and I knew they’d struggle with getting in. Hell, Ned didn’t even want to apply, he had too much to worry about at home. And I did worry about Queens, there was no one here to help anymore and the world is still so messed up. I felt like it’s my responsibility, as one of those left behind, to take care of everything.”

“That’s pretty mighty of you kiddo, but you’re just a kid. You deserve a chance to go to college and live a good life.”

“I know that,” Peter said, but there was no anger in his voice, he just sounded tired. “And trust me, I want to go to MIT so badly but then I saw May and Pepper’s faces when I’d talk about it. It’s not your fault, but Pepper… didn’t have anyone. It was like when Ben died all over again and I remember what that was like for May and I. How lonely that you feel and just the thought of leaving her and everyone else too? It was just too much.”

Tony’s heart sank with the knowledge he was part of the reason, before he could say anything Peter was continuing. “And I missed you. Like, all the time. You were everywhere I went, there were so many memorials about Iron Man and Tony Stark. It was like you were haunting me and the only times I felt okay was when I had everyone else around me too. It’s not your fault, so like don’t get upset or anything.”

Tony couldn’t help the chuckle. “Doesn’t sound like it’s anyone's but Thanos's fault Pete, you included. For the record, I think you did the right thing in taking the gap year too. You deserve to live a good life but if you were hurt, then you needed to stay. I trust your judgment.”

“Everyone else does too,” he said, coming a bit closer to Tony, their shoulders touching. “I think they just thought I’d never actually go to college. That I was putting everyone else's needs before my own, but it was what I needed too, y’know?”

Tony reached his arm around his kid, pulling Peter even closer and kissing the side of his head. “Yeah, I do, Pete. I’ll support you, okay? No matter what, you’ve always got me in your corner.”

Peter visibly relaxed at his side, the tension Tony knew he’d been holding onto since he walked dinner was slowly fusing out of him. “Did you like MJ?” he asked. “I know she can be a bit tough…”

“I liked her Pete, you two seem really good for each other. I’m glad you found someone,” he said, rubbing his hand up and down Peter’s arm. “Speaking of, Pepper and I are going to fast track our wedding this year and I wanted to ask if you’d like to be one of my groomsmen?”

“Really?” Peter asked, pulling away so he could face Tony.

“Really.”

Peter’s face flushed red and he nodded, grinning widely, reminding Tony of the 14 year old he found in Queens. “Yes! I would love to! That’s so exciting! Do you know when? Where? Oh, share the details!”

Tony chuckled. “Not just yet, we’re still planning it but don’t worry, we’ll take any input you might have.”

Peter reached over and hugged him. “Thank you.”

“Of course kid,” he said, hugging Peter back. “Now come on, let’s try and get some sleep, yeah?”

-

When Tony finally got the chance to read Peter’s patrols, he most definitely was freaking out. The kid really had been insanely active during the first few months after the Snap happened. He was out almost 24/7, helping people find loved ones, and helping clean up what was destroyed. Tony was annoyed at Pepper, May, and Happy for allowing the 16 year old kid to run himself to the ground like this. He could tell how tired Peter was, how burnt out he must have felt day in and out. He poured over each report, reading every word Karen had compiled, he even started watching some of the videos before he had to stop.

This was doing him no good, he had to keep remembering that. Peter was alive and good, now that Tony was back, he’d always be safe and sound.

He’d gone through the bad guy who knew Peter’s identity, that was a hard one to read but that guy wasn’t a bother anymore. He watched Peter get beat up by a scientist with several metal arms, who Peter seemed to call “Doc Oc” all the time, despite the man’s angry protests.

He even watched Peter take down an entire crime syndicate run by some guy calling himself Mr. Negative. Watched as he had to manage mostly by himself, but occasionally saw Nat or Steve jump in. It was clear that while Peter was part of a team, they weren’t as invested in his safety as Tony tried to be. He tried really hard not to be mad about it because he did see the times when Peter was saved, where he was taken care of no matter how bad things got.

But then he got to what he assumed Pepper was the most worried about.

The report started normal, boring even but then something attacked Peter without remorse. A man, dressed in a giant mechanical suit that according to both Karen and Peter, later on, resembled a rhino. He attacked Peter while he was patrolling, causing what seemed like thousands of dollars worth of property damage. The report, while detailed, seemed to be skipping over just how much of an all out attack it was. Nat was first on the scene but her report, along with the one eventually from Steve, wasn’t included with Karen’s.

He had to stop himself from looking at theirs too, he had to keep reminding himself that this was over a year ago. This was old news.

Except it wasn’t for him.

So he watched the footage and hated every second of it. The rhino guy destroyed Peter, the kid tried so hard to stay away from buildings and other people, but the rhino guy was relentless and skilled with this mech suit. Peter was thrown through buildings and had a car slammed on top of him at one point, the damage to him and the suit was off the charts. The video feed was accompanied by Peter trying to get the guy to chill out but being wildly unsuccessful.

It ended with both Peter’s legs being crushed before the footage completely blinked out. Karen’s report ended with a laundry list of gruesome details, broken bones, internal bleeding, concussion, bruising… he had to stop reading just so he could suck in a breath of air and calm himself down.

He wasn’t there for any of this. He was dead and his kid almost died because there’d been no one to protect him. Happy hadn’t even arrived on the scene until after Nat and Steve did and that, for some reason, made him angry. That was Happy’s job, it was to protect the kid at all costs and he wasn’t even there for him? Sure, Happy didn’t have superpowers but he should have been in contact with Peter, he should have recognized the situation and gotten back up there much faster. According to Karen, there was no communication between Peter or anyone else, FRIDAY included until help arrived.

Before he could stop himself, he was moving, walking down the hallway and on the hunt for Happy. It was late in the afternoon, everyone had abandoned him in the morning to go about their lives, but he knew Happy was still around. FRIDAY directed him down to the security office and he walked in, interrupting what looked like a meeting.

“Tony,” Happy said, on his feet in an instant. “What’s up?”

“I need to speak with you, privately.”

The other two employees looked terrified, but Happy just nodded, gesturing for the other two to leave them alone. The room wasn’t one he recognized having been in before, but it had clearly become Happy’s office. There were pictures all over his desk, from the angel he could see a few of Peter and May, one that looked like it was from Peter’s graduation.

He’d never seen the photos, no one offered to show him.

“Everything okay?” Happy asked, as Tony took a heavy seat in the empty chair. He didn’t look all that phased, maybe a little ruffled.

“I saw what happened with the rhino guy,” Tony said as if he expected Happy to know immediately what he was talking about.

Happy looked confused and then it seemed to hit him. “You looked at Pete’s footage huh? We had a feeling you’d freak out about that one.”

“We?” Tony questioned.

“Yeah, Pep and May and I talked about it when you got access granted. We thought about telling you beforehand but, we knew, you’d look no matter what. The kid’s fine, Tony. He took a beating, I’m not going to lie, it was touch and go for a little bit but he made a full recovery.”

Tony hadn’t really even gotten that far yet, he just knew what happened and saw how badly the kid had been hurt. Recovery wasn’t even a thing on his mind.

“That’s not why I’m upset,” Tony said. “I’m upset that no one was there to help him, specifically you.”

Looking taken aback, Happy frowned. “Tony, I don’t know what you think happened-”

He cut him off. “He was alone getting his ass beaten for almost an hour before Nat and Steve showed up! Where were you? No communication with Karen or even with FRIDAY! Someone should have been there!”

I should have been there, Tony found himself wanting to say but had to snap his mouth shut. He wasn’t there. He was Dust. He was dead and no one seemed to be ready to take up his place in caring for the kid.

“He’s an adult!” Happy countered. “And we do help him! Tony, he’s not a 14 year old kid in pajamas anymore! He was handling it and when he couldn’t anymore, help was on its way to him. What did you want me to do?”

“Been there,” Tony grounded out but his anger was dissipating the longer he sat there. He wasn’t mad at Happy, he was mad at himself for dying and not being there for Peter. “You should have stayed in contact with him. Monitored his patrols! Had FRIDAY reporting to you.”

“Tony,” Happy said with a sigh. “I know you’re upset but you don’t understand what life was like for all of us. You were dead, you weren’t coming back and we had to find other ways to deal with things. Peter had the means to contact me, or anyone else, he’s the one who didn’t activate the emergency line right away. I was busy too, I had to sit here and help Pepper with a company that lost its leader, lost its founder and that was hard enough. And you weren’t the only one who Dusted either, Tony. Both my sister and her husband got Dusted, my nephew was left alone and I had to help support him too.”

Tony immediately felt like crap for coming down there and he immediately pulled himself back. “Sorry, Hap. I mean, I know things were tough but I just want my kid to be safe and I wasn’t there.”

“Yeah,” Happy said, shaking his head too. “We all want the best for Peter, but things happen and this was just a one time issue. We made a new system after that, the one that alerted you to the problem before. We have things set in place now that make sure Peter and everyone else for that matter, can get help when they need it. It’s not perfect, I know that, but it was the best we could do without you.”

Everyone kept saying that, how much life sucked without Tony but now that he’s been back, he’s been nothing but ignored. They forget to add him to things, talk like he’s supposed to magically know what everyone’s referring to. It’s not fair, he didn’t miss anyone. There’s no large blank space where he didn’t have Pepper, Happy, or the kid but it feels like he’s missing them right now.

“Are you okay?” Happy asked him, when he’d apparently been silent for too long.

“Yeah,” he said, quickly, a very good lie. “Sorry, I just,” he wiped his hand over his face. “I don’t like seeing Peter hurt and it was a lot.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t look at the rest. There’s nothing important that you need to focus on right now.”

“Yeah,” he said, lying again because of course, he was going to read the rest of the reports and watch whatever footage he wanted to. It was clear no one was going to flat out tell him what happened while he was gone. And when he was done with Peter, he was going to go through all the Avenger missions too.

“Come on,” Happy said, getting up. “Let’s go get lunch, the deli down the street is open again, we can have it delivered just like old times.”

-

Tony was trying very hard not to freak out all the time. But suddenly, it felt like every new thing he learned about the last two years was just another relentless punch to the gut. Reading over the Avenger’s reports was almost as bad as seeing Peter’s until he got to the day Pepper first wore the Rescue suit.

There’d been a group of pro-Thanos anti everything else protestors or something, that caused a major disturbance in New York City. Bombs were going off, fires, fighting, and what seemed like a massive incident, and knowing that she was in the middle of it, made his hands shake. Why didn’t she tell him? Peter mentioned the suit, but why wouldn’t he mention this happened?

He was locked out of reading a lot of it, Pepper’s report was pretty basic but the suit had taken on a lot of damage. So much so, it was easy to read between the lines, Pepper must have been caught up in one of the explosions. There was shrapnel damage to the suit, it made Tony’s heart skip, he had to walk away from reading the rest of the report.

Would this have happened if he was there? Would he have made a difference at all? His mind was racing so hard, he had to walk away. He had to stop looking at all the reports, all of the things he couldn’t do anything about.

They didn’t want him to know. They didn’t care if he knew or not. They were just keeping him in the dark for whatever stupid reason and the more Tony pushed, who knew if they’d continue down that line. Sure, he was in the system now, but that didn’t mean anything. He still wasn’t Iron Man and every time he’d ask Steve about it, he just kept pushing it off, saying they needed more time to regroup.

Finding his way back in SI wasn’t that easy either, there was so much going on with all the returning employees, and all of Pepper’s attention was taken up. She all but dumped him in the lab, allowed him into the system again, and then was gone

Tony was, for the first time in a very long time, a little lost.

Every lifeline he tried seemed to be too busy to even notice.

“I’ve got meetings all morning,” Pepper informed him as she got dressed. “You can come with me, if you’d like but I doubt you’ll enjoy it.”

He definitely wouldn’t, he hated them even when he knew exactly what was going on.

“Sorry Tones, the government’s going nuts right now. I can slip down next weekend, but that’s all I can do,” Rhodey answered when Tony called, barely having enough time to say it before he had to hang up.

He stopped Happy and May before they left for FEAST but neither of them seemed all that excited about Tony tagging along. “Maybe at our bigger event,” she said to him over breakfast when he mentioned it. “Really, Tony, I appreciate it but you’re still big news and I’m concerned about the crowds.”

Fair, but at the same time, he used to go around in sunglasses and a hat all the time, and when he said so, Happy just laughed. “Yeah, but those weren’t all that good, to begin with, boss, everyone could tell it was you, and now, people are gonna be on high alert for you. You haven’t been caught by the paps in weeks.”

“Because I haven’t left the Tower,” Tony pointed out. “There’s nowhere for me to go.”

That seemed to make both of them look a little upset. “Why don’t you head to the Compound?” Happy suggested. Which to Tony was pretty much the same thing as sitting at the Tower. He didn’t just want to hover around, he wanted to do something. He wanted to be Tony Stark again, at the least.

“Nah,” he said with a shrug and then went to find Peter. The kid had been MIA for a bit, spending time with his girlfriend and Ned, in between going out on patrols. He came over for dinner almost every night but he barely stayed after that.

Logically Tony knew the kid would eventually be an 18 year old and have a life of his own but he really didn’t think it would happen in the blink of an eye. Peter really didn’t need him anymore and he found himself missing the rambling kid who acted more like his shadow than anything else.

Walking out of the elevator to the kid’s floor, he caught sight of Peter in his red and blue, heading towards the elevator.

“Oh hi,” Peter said, mask in one hand, a sandwich in the other. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing just wanted to see if you wanted to get some lab time today but if you’re…” Tony trailed, hoping Peter would catch the tone of his voice.

“Oh I uh, well, um, I was gonna patrol but if you really want to then I think…,” Peter offered sheepishly.

“Nah,” Tony answered. “You’re already suited up, go out, have fun. Maybe lab day tomorrow?”

“Uhh,” Peter said and Tony knew the answer was no. “Sure.”

“Yeah okay,” Tony answered instead, patting Peter’s shoulders. “Have a good patrol. Be back for dinner?”

“Yeah! Happy’s making his famous Alfredo pasta bake, I would never skip that.”

Once he watched the kid crawl out of the window and swing out into the city, Tony was well and truly out of ideas. He could, maybe call Steve or Nat or even Bruce but they hadn’t made any effort since the first week or so. What would he say to them anyway? I’m a bored multi-millionaire, someone needs to come and entertain me?

Shaking off the thought, he headed towards his lab, hoping at least there he could get to work on a few things. Peter had given him a great deal of information about the nanotech he used with his newer suits, enough so that he felt mildly confident in his abilities there.

“Keep me updated on the kid, FRI. Let me know if he needs help or if anything unusual happens.” He knew Peter had protocols and procedures to help him, but he still didn’t trust them on their own. No one had watched the kid like Tony had and he wasn’t about to back down now.

An hour later, after losing himself to his work, FRIDAY interrupted him. “Sir, we momentarily lost contact with Karen. However, the suit appears to be online now.”

“Huh,” he said, putting down his tools. “Any idea why? Everything seems okay?”

“The suit seems to have rebooted, I have established my connection with Karen but there are several functions that are coming back online. There seems to have been some sort of interruption that caused the suit to malfunction.”

“Call Peter.”

Nothing happened for several minutes before FRIDAY spoke. “Communication is currently unavailable.”

“Call Happy.”

He answered on the second ring. “What’s up, Tony?”

“Peter’s suit went offline for a hot minute and now FRIDAY can’t get ahold of him.”

“Oh,” Happy said. “It happens sometimes,” he paused and then, “doesn’t look like he sent out any alerts.”

Tony was flabbergasted. “Still, Hap, shouldn’t this be of concern for someone?”

“Honestly,” Happy said, the sounds of a busy office were filtering in distractedly. “He’s fine, Tony. He’s got resources if something’s wrong with the suit, including his phone. He hasn’t sent out any messages or his EAS hasn’t gone off either.”

Tony tried not to be annoyed, he really did but the answer Happy was giving him, wasn’t want he wanted to hear. He wasn’t in any of these alerts, no one was sending him updates or putting him in text groups or EAS messages. He was out there, alone and ignored and now he was the only person that seemed to care.

“Still,” Tony pressed but knew Happy wasn’t going to budge about it anyway. “Fine, just if you hear something?”

“I’ll let you know, don’t worry.”

They hung up, but still, something nagged at him. “FRI, what was the last info that came from Karen before the reboot?”

“There was a spike in Peter’s vitals before the suit went offline. It seems that there was a sudden influx of power, which may indicate electrocution.”

Tony nearly fell to the ground. “He was electrocuted?”

“It’s unknown, sir however after researching, there were several lightning strikes in the vicinity of where Peter’s last GPS ping was.”

“Get me a suit right now.”

“I’m sorry sir-”

“FRIDAY, I don’t care what you have to do, get me my goddamn suit right now. Mark I if you have to, don’t care how old or broken it is. If it can fly, get it on me since no one else seems to be helping my kid out there. Keep calling him too, try to force the call through Karen if you have to. Get me anything you can.”

The whole room was oddly silent, as the seconds ticked by. Did anyone know what was happening? Were the Avengers getting alerts when Peter’s suit went offline? When his vitals spiked and he wasn’t responding anymore? What would have happened if Tony hadn’t instructed FRIDAY to monitor Peter’s actions? Would anyone else even have known he was potentially injured? What kind of system did these people continue to operate on that felt his kid so vulnerable?

“Sir, it appears your best suit would be the Bleeding Edge armor. It still has some minor damage but it will allow you to get to and assist Peter the fastest.”

Tony scrambled to find the nanite casing he’d been working on last week, pushing it on his chest and immediately pressing the button. The suit, like it had done the last time he’d put it on and went to fucking space, spread out and over him. He was halfway out the window by the time his HUD was up. FRIDAY had already plotted a course that would take him to Peter the fastest way possible.

“Alert the others,” he said half heartedly, almost wanting to be selfish and show them how it felt to be left behind but Peter’s life was on the line. He had FRIDAY sent him alerts, hoping he could push past whatever security features he wasn’t fully in on.

Jumping through so many hoops was exhausting and every second he spent trying was just another second he wasn’t helping his kid.

“Tony?” Steve’s face popped up in the corner of his HUD. “What’s going on?”

“Peter’s suit went offline and now the kid isn’t answering. FRIDAY thinks he may have been struck by lightning. I’m on my way to his last known location.”

A beat of silence went by before Steve was talking. “Are you sure that’s necessary? There’s no SOS alert coming from his suit. Everything we have says it’s in working order, just because he isn’t answering you, it doesn’t mean the worse. His suit had glitched before when something like that happened, it just took a little bit for communications to come back up.”

“No,” Tony said sternly. “He’s not ignoring my calls, Steve. He’s not answering and Karen isn’t communicating properly. Even if he’s perfectly fine, he may have been electrocuted and currently not able to call for help. I can't believe,” he paused. “That you’re acting like nothing is wrong.”

“That’s not what I’m saying, I’m just pointing out that this isn’t the 15 year old you left two year-”

“I didn’t leave him, Steve, I fucking had no choice. I died. I didn’t go on vacation or fuck off for two years. I don’t care if I find him eating a ham sandwich, I’m going to make sure my kid’s alright.”

“Alright,” Steve said shortly. “If something’s wrong, let me know.”

Tony ended the call, watching as the tiny blip that was Peter was getting closer. Without contact with Karen, he didn't know if the kid was even alive. Sure, FRIDAY should be able to tell that but if the suit was glitching, who knows what was happening? It burned his gut hearing how blase Steve was about the whole thing like Peter was okay with just fending for himself.

As he got closer, however, the thought did cross his mind that maybe Peter would be annoyed with him. If the kid was fine, how would he react to knowing Tony was hovering over him again? Didn’t they just start getting better with that stuff before two years went by? Peter had time to learn and grow, but Tony didn’t see it, he just read about it after the fact.

“FRI, I don’t see him,” Tony said, as he hovered over the area FRIDAY had indicated Peter was at. It took him a second to see the kid, but the second he did he knew something was wrong.

Peter was on the ground, curled up on his side. Tony’s descent was maddening slowly. “Let everyone know we have an emergency,” he said, voice almost completely lost. The second he landed, he was moving, noticing the small hole that sat right at Peter’s shoulder. It didn’t look dangerous, it was barely the size of a dime, but Tony knew better.

“Pete,” he said, his suit melting away, allowing him to put his hand on Peter’s shoulder. The kid was cold to the touch, while the rain had stopped shortly before Tony left, it was clear he’d been laying here in the cold for a while. He easily moved the kid onto his back, pulling up the mask after he was settled.

“FRI, scan him the best you can, I need his vital information for the glasses, send that to everyone else too.”

Peter’s heart was beating erratically, that was the best FRIDAY could provide since Karen still wasn’t up and running. He leaned down, trying to listen as the kid let out small huffs of air instead of breathing.

“You need to perform CPR immediately, sir, until help can arrive. Peter is in cardiac arrest.”

Tony was having an out of body experience, as he started to try and get his kid’s heart beating the right way. No matter what he tried, Peter didn’t seem to breathe any better and then, after what felt like a lifetime, he stopped breathing altogether.

The panic surged through him, his hands shaking as he did chest compressions and gave Peter the only breath he was able to take. FRIDAY was still talking to him and without realizing it, Steve was suddenly next to him, trying to pull Tony away.

“No,” he said, or at least tried to, reaching back out for his kid, but someone else was putting an oxygen mask over Peter’s face. “Pete,” he said dumbly, watching as more people came and put the kid on a stretcher. Someone else grabbed Tony’s shoulder and tried to pull him away but he fought it. “No, I need Peter.”

There was no sound left in the world, everything was so silent, all he could hear was the wild racing of his own heart, the sound of the rain starting up again, hitting the ground around them. How long could someone survive without breathing? What if they couldn’t get his heart to beat the right way again? What if he was too late and his kid was dead because he wasn’t prepared, he wasn’t watching, he wasn’t ready for any of this.

He landed hard on his knees, gasping in the air so fast it barely stayed long enough to settle his lungs. So many hands were on him, squeezing and pulling, trying to move him but he was unmovable.

“Tony,” he heard Steve’s voice, strong but far away. “Come on, you have to breathe.”

And so he did, one in, one out and things got marginally clearer. The rooftop, Peter’s cold lifeless body in his arms, barely breathing, heart stopping.

“Pete?” he asked, in a gasp.

“He’s on a quinjet right now, they are taking him to the Compound. Are you good?”

No, he was not good, not in any way shape, or form.

“No,” he said, struggling to get back up without toppling over. “Fuck, Steve the kid’s heart stopped.”

“I know but he’s in good hands, he’ll bounce back.”

“He shouldn’t have to bounce back! You didn’t listen to me and it almost cost my kid his life!”

Steve looked taken back for a minute. “It was a mistake, Tony. No one was doing it on purpose, we haven’t had something like this happen before.”

“I DON’T CARE!” Tony shouted, throwing his hands in the air. “IT SHOULD NEVER HAVE HAPPENED!”

He tapped his chest, the suit coming back to him and he started to walk backward towards the roof’s edge. He turned back to Steve, who stood there, frowning. “I have tried to be patient and just stand by and hope you’d finally remember me but god damn it, Steve. Peter would have been dead if I wasn’t here, you realize that right? So now, I’m not going to calm down, I’m going to fly to the Compound and take care of my kid.”

He didn’t wait for Steve’s reply, but he was pretty sure he didn’t say anything as Tony took off the rooftop.

-

He was a man with a mission the second his feet touched the ground. He stopped for no one, answered zero questions, and gave zero fucks about what people were going to do about it. No one was stopping him, just a few nurses who looked more alarmed by Iron Man’s sudden appearance, especially as Tony rushed down the halls.

He caught sight of Natasha, lingering in the hallway. “Where is he?”

“Down at the end of the hallway, but you need to calm down before you go storming in there. They just got him stable but he’s still on a ventilator.”

“Jesus, you too? My kid could have died tonight because none of you bothered to care. I’m mad about that and it’s not going to change, so move so I can go see him.”

“We weren’t ignoring either of you, Tony but-”

He was gone before she could finish her sentence, walking down the hallway and then straight into Peter’s already occupied hospital room.

Happy, May and Pepper were already in there, already surrounding the kid’s bed as he lay there, bright white sheets, making his complexion look so much paler. A tube was down his throat, breathing for him, his chest covered in monitors.

There was a weird pattern that danced along Peter’s neck and disappeared behind the hospital gown, it looked like a tree blooming against his skin.

He could have lost him.

Peter could have died alone and cold on a rooftop in Queens.

“He’ll be fine,” Pepper said, probably not for the first time because nothing else mattered to him at that moment. “They are just waiting for him to wake up and they can take him off the ventilator. His healing has handled the damage, okay?”

“It shouldn’t have had to,” Tony said, his voice coming from a place he didn’t recognize. “He shouldn’t have been left out there for 30 minutes before I arrived. Someone should have been notified, or at least, someone should have believed me.”

“Tony,” Happy said, but it was too late for him to stop now. Steve and Nat were just the tip of the iceberg. He could deal with not being an Avenger, but he couldn’t deal with these three people, ones he loved, not letting him back into their life. And most of all, not taking care of the kid they all love. “It’s not that we didn’t believe you, we just were following protocol.”

“No, this is on all of you for not taking care of my kid.”

“Excuse me?” May said, standing up so sharply her chair tipped. “You don’t think I take care of Peter? He’s my fucking kid, Tony, of course, I care for him. Who do you think took him in after his parents died? Slept in bed with him for months, holding him, hugging him, whipping away his tears? Who do you think kept him together after Ben died? After YOU died? I have taken care of that kid for most of his life. How dare you suggest otherwise!”

“THEN WHERE WERE YOU? All the times he went out there and needed help? No one took my place! No one watched him as I did! You just let everything I worked on, fall apart. Not just with Peter, but FRIDAY? I’m lucky the kid bothered to tinker with him, it seems like he’s the only one who missed me, the only one who's at least trying to make me feel like I’m actually wanted here.”

“How do you think we were supposed to do that, Tony?” Pepper asked, she wasn’t yelling or even sounding very mad. May was crying now, Happy walked over to pull her close, giving Tony a look he’d never seen from his friend before. “You weren’t here, we had to make due and we did our best, just like we’re doing our best now that you’re back with us. We’re trying, we’re learning, it’s the best we can offer. Your shoes aren’t fillable, Tony, no matter how hard any of us tried. And don’t you dare act like we haven’t wanted you back!”

“Then why when I’m here, do you just act like I’m not?” he said, shaking his head. “You haven’t included me in anything. You got so used to life without me that you can’t bother to put me back in it. I’m not part of anything! I’ve been kicked out of my own family and it nearly cost Peter his life!”

Before Tony or anyone else could argue more, a sharp alarm sound rang throughout the room and all adults turned to Peter, whose once quiet machines were now screaming out. Medical professionals stormed the room, moving everyone into the hallway with such efficiency, Tony was sure he teleported there.

As much as he wanted to stay angry, all of it left the second he saw Peter’s face and the thought of losing his kid slammed into him.

“Tony,” Pepper said, tentatively coming towards him. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize… you have to understand how hard it was without you, how long it took for us to find this sense of balance and family. We aren’t trying to keep you out, I promise. We love Peter, we take care of him and this was just… it was a mistake. God, I can’t even begin to tell you what it was like when you were gone. You’re my… you’re my everything.”

“But I’m back now,” he said, swallowing down the emotions that were too loose. “I just want to be back to how it was. But every time I try, you all just disappear on me. You’ve made a family without me and I just want to be part of it.”

“I don’t think that’s possible,” Happy said, his arm around May’s shoulder as she tucked herself into his side. “Tony, the world moved on, the world changed, including Peter. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you, you’re right, we should have tried harder to figure out if someone was wrong.”

The tone in the hallway shifted away from the anger and all four adults turned to the door Peter was behind. The commotion had come to an end, a doctor was pushing her way out of the room, hands up already, glaring at the group. “He’s fine,” she said. “But if you guys can’t be grownups, then no one is going in there.”

Tony deflated completely. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I just don’t know how to do this anymore. I don’t fit in anywhere. I’m sorry May, I didn’t… I didn’t mean what I said before. I know how much you love him.”

The doctor looked a little confused and returned back into Peter’s room with haste. Whatever sadness was there, still lingered just a bit. Tony didn’t feel at home just yet, but he felt better now that he actually said those things out loud. The gaggle of medical professionals soon left Peter’s room and the group of adults moved back in.

“You fit in,” May said, taking her seat back beside Peter’s bed again. The machines were beeping normally, the hiss of the ventilator a constant reminder that Peter was alive. “You’ve always fit in. God, Tony, we all missed you, we all love you.”

“Yeah,” Happy said. “I should have taken you seriously, that’s my fault too.”

“He really missed you,” May said. “Anytime he was hurt, you were always the first person he asked for.”

“I’m sorry, I wish I could have been here.”

-

Two weeks later, Peter was already back out in the suit. He recovered quickly, having zero ill effects as to what he confirmed was a lightning strike. He didn’t have much memory around it but Tony had been there to fill in the blanks, no matter how hard it was to hear them.

Before leaving the Compound he’d sat down with everyone, Steve, Natasha included, and discussed where exactly Tony Stark and Iron Man fit in. It wasn’t an easy conversation, but Tony walked away feeling better than he had in weeks.

Admittedly it would take a little more time and effort for him to really return as Iron Man and Tony Stark, but at least now he felt the support of his family again.

“Oh my god,” Peter said over the comms, making Tony jump ever so. It was Peter’s first night back, and Tony was sticking with him through it, just in case. Peter had called him paranoid but didn’t complain else wise. FRIDAY was back to monitoring him when he was out, Tony had looped everyone into the alerts too, they were more than a united team for Peter at this point.

“You alright?” he asked, glancing at Peter’s normal vitals up on his screen. Nothing was in the red, he wasn’t even breathing heavily.

“No, I just saw the cutest puppy I’ve ever seen in my entire life but he was too far away to pet. I just stopped mid swing to see if I could catch them but I can’t see them anymore.”

That was the type of problem Tony could handle hearing about.

“That’s too bad Pete.”

“I’m having Karen send you a photo in a minute.”

Said photo appeared, one of a tall person walking a very tiny dog of some kind, Tony really didn’t know. But it was cute, small, and brown with a curly tail.

“Hmm,” Tony said. “It reminds me of you, Pete. No wonder you think it’s adorable.”

“Rude,” Peter huffed, Tony could hear him swinging, the slight swoosh of air around them, along with the distinctive sound of his web shooters. “What time is the fitting tomorrow?”

“9:00, sharp. Which means you need to be up and moving no later than 7:45. We’re going to meet Rhodey down there too. And afterward, we’re heading to the Compound for training.”

“Sounds delightful. Waking up early, trying on stuffy suits, and then getting to beat up Iron Man. I bet you can tell which one I’m really excited for.”

The sass on the kid had grown a lot but Tony couldn’t help but smile. “Just for that I’m taking a million pictures of you and sending them to the group chat. And I’m going to make you put on every single suit. It’s my wedding, my rules.”

“Uh,” Peter said. “I think it’s Pepper’s wedding, but you do you.”

Tony laughed, a warm feeling of love spreading through his chest. He’d spent too much time trying to fit into a puzzle that had already been put together. It took some time, but finally, he realized all he had to do was start a new one and he fit in just fine.