Archive of Our Own

Full moons always made Liam afraid. He was always aware of the shift, humming just below the surface–the shift that was clearly waiting, ready to strike the second one minor inconvenience broke Liam's fragile control. It had been months since the Anukite–since Liam's fear and anger made him lose control--but he still remembered how easy it was for him to snap. To lose control. 

Ordinarily, Liam would lock himself in his room on full moons, headphones on high to block out any other sounds, and curl up with a history book. Ordinarily, he'd spend the entire 24 hours away from people as much as physically possible, so he wouldn't have to worry about hurting anyone. 

This full moon was… different. He blamed Theo for that. 

Liam was in his room, fully prepared to keep up with his monthly tradition, when a car horn honked from outside. When he looked out, it was Theo with a stupid grin on his face. "Come on a drive with me," Theo called up, when Liam opened his window to peek out. 

"Why?" 

Theo's grin widened. "Come on, Li. It'll be fun. Just you and me." 

Liam couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips at the thought: just him, Theo, and Theo's truck. Still, "I don't think I can today." 

Theo crossed his arms. "Why not?" 

"Well… I… ya know," Liam floundered. He couldn't just say the truth–that the Full Moon would be out soon, and if he was with Theo in a new place, that something bad would happen. 

"Come on, Li. Don't make me spend tonight alone. I bought extra blankets and pillows and everything." 

Liam frowned. "For what? Where are we going?" 

"Is that a yes? Are you coming?" 

Liam sighed. "Theo–" 

Theo rolled his eyes. "I can't just tell you. It's a surprise. Can't I just take my boyfriend on a nice drive without being interrogated?" 

Liam smiled. "Boyfriend, huh?" 

"Yes, boyfriend. We've been dating for weeks–" 

"I know," Liam laughed, "I just wanted to hear you say it again." 

Theo smiled. "I'll say it as many times as you want if it means you'll come." 

"Hmm. Tempting." 

Theo sighed. "You know, I didn't want to pull this card so early. But if you come, I'll buy us food. And roadtrip snacks." 

Liam's eyes lit up. " And road trip snacks?" 

Theo laughed. "Yes, you little food gremlin. And roadtrip snacks." 

Liam bit his lip, considering. On one hand, he knew that if he went with Theo, there was a chance he'd lose his control and end up hurting him or his truck. He liked Theo. Maybe even… The point was, he didn't want to hurt him. On the other, Theo was a Chimera–and a resourceful one at that. He could heal, if Liam did lose control, and he was also good at fighting. If Liam tried to hurt him, Theo would be able to take care of himself. And then there was the food… 

"Okay!" Liam called down eventually. "Just give me a minute to grab my jacket, and I'll be down." 

Liam doubted it even took a full minute to grab a jacket, throw it on, sprint down stairs, and rush out the front door. He doubted it even took thirty seconds to get from his bedroom to the front lawn. When he got outside, he instantly threw his arms around Theo, pulling the Chimera in for a frenzied kiss. 

Theo chuckled against his lips. "Wow. I missed you, too. It's been a whole.. what? Thirty seconds since I last saw you?" 

"Shh," Liam said dismissively, kissing him again. 

Theo smiled against his lips before cupping Liam's cheeks and deepening the kiss. When he eventually pulled away, he put his forehead against Liam's. "I really did miss you." 

"You saw me yesterday. And thirty seconds ago," Liam teased. 

Theo chuckled. "Yeah. Well. Thirty seconds too long." Pulling away, Theo moved his hands from Liam's cheeks down to the beta's hands. "Come on," he said, leading Liam towards the truck. "If we leave right now we can get there right as it starts." 

"As what starts?" 

"The surprise," Theo smirked. 

Liam groaned, throwing his head back. "Theo, I wanna know." He moaned. 

"And you will, you little gremlin. Just as soon as we get there." 

"I'm not a gremlin." 

"No. You're right. You're a little wolf." Theo smirked, leaning forward and pecking Liam on the cheek before pulling his hands away in order to open the passenger side door. "You just act like a little gremlin." 

"Well, you act like an ass." 

"And you love it." Theo smiled. "Now get in before we're late." 

Liam sighed, "Fine. But only because you promised food and snacks." 

With that, Liam climbed into the passenger seat of the truck. Theo closed the door with a shake of his head and a low, “passenger seat princess”–though said with that same smile that lit up his eyes, brighter than the stars. 

Theo kept his promise on food and snacks, stopping at a McDonalds drive through when Liam obnoxiously pushed his shoulder, then stopping again not more than five minutes later when Liam saw a gas station. Their haul of road trip snacks was enough to last them days– weeks –but Liam carried out the bags with the biggest grin on his face. He had gummy worms, gummy bears, a pack of every flavor of Lays potato chips–and nacho cheese Doritos, cookies, a 68 oz soft drink, three cans of energy drinks, Slim Jims, and a questionable amount of candy bars. Theo, for his part, grabbed a small soft drink and a little bag of pretzels. The Chimera went to pay, pulling out a clump of crumpled up bills from his leather jacket pocket, but Liam beat him to it thankfully. 

The drive took about an hour, time spent with the radio blasting Taylor Swift and no talking–just eating, belting out lyrics, and… enjoying the company more than anything in the world. They didn't need to talk, to acknowledge each other or make small talk, because they could feel each other's presence in their bones–in their souls –and that… that was enough. That would always be enough. 

Eventually, though, Theo pulled into a scenic view that overlooked a small city, far away from people–from buildings and lights. From anything at all. Now, with the sun almost finished setting and the sky beginning to darken into night, it was starting to seem… isolated. 

"This isn’t where you murder me, is it?" Liam joked.

Theo just smiled at him before opening his car door and moving to look in the back–moving to grab all the blankets and pillows. 

"Oh no. You so are. You bought new blankets to wrap my body in when I die."

Theo laughed. "Stop being dramatic. Why would I bury you in a blanket I was probably caught on camera buying? That would be ridiculous." Theo finished grabbing the blankets before leaning into the front seat, close enough to look at Liam with a gleam in his eyes. "Just trust me." 

Trust was a tricky word for them. It wasn't that long ago when Theo had betrayed Liam's pack and almost–did, technically–killed Scott. Still… For reasons Liam could never quite put into words, Liam did trust Theo. Trusted him with his life. 

"Okay," Liam said softly. 

Theo’s expression softened as he studied Liam. Slowly, he moved further in, giving Liam a small kiss on the lips. "Come on, then. Let's get the back all set up." 

Liam almost didn't understand–until Theo moved away, closing the driver's side door and heading to the truck bed with all the blankets. The Chimera then climbed into the back, setting up a blanket on the bottom and the pillows against the back that connected the trunk to the rest of the truck. 

Liam slowly got out, grabbing the food as he went. He watched as Theo continued laying out the rest of the blankets, making the trunk as comfortable as possible. "Cozy," Liam said softly. 

It was. It was cozy, and cute, and… sweet. 

So unlike Theo. 

Theo's cheeks reddened and he turned his back on Liam to hide it. "Yeah, well. I wanted you to be comfortable." 

Theo's heart skipped a beat, and Liam smiled–because Theo was lying. Badly. 

"Oh my God," Liam said, his smile widening. "You're a fucking romantic. " 

"Yeah?" Theo turned to him, frowning. He looked angry, but his cheeks were getting redder by the second. "And what if I am?" 

"Well. Then…" Liam paused before kicking off his shoes and then jumping onto the bed of the truck. Theo stood up straighter, turning towards Liam. Liam took a step closer to the Chimera, until they were just inches apart. "We're just going to have to do something about that." 

"Yeah?” Theo eyed him, then closed the remaining gap between them. "Like what?" 

"Like this." Liam dropped the bags of snacks before he reached out, putting the back of his hand against Theo's neck, pulling the Chimera in for a kiss. At first Theo seemed surprised, almost pulling away entirely, but he soon deepened the kiss. Dropping the remaining blankets he had, Theo wrapped his hands around Liam, one hand on the back of the beta's neck and the other on the back of his head, his fingers weaving through Liam's brown hair. 

There was electricity there. Liam always felt it, against his lips, his fingers, his very being–like Theo still had some of Josh's power coursing through him that always sent a shock through Liam. Except–it felt good . Liam could never get enough of that feeling. It was like life was being shocked back into him, like he was more alive against Theo than anywhere else. 

Eventually, Theo pulled back from Liam and rested his forehead against Liam's, his breath coming out in deep gasps. It was as though, while Theo breathed a shock of life into Liam, Liam always took Theo's breath away. 

Slowly, Theo moved his hand away from Liam's head, dropping it down to the beta's neck and intertwining his hands there. "I… you…" Theo stopped, closing his eyes, shaking his head softly. 

Theo did that, sometimes: start to speak, just to cut himself off. If Liam had to guess, it was because the Chimera was born to lie–born to hide the truth at every possible moment. Being vulnerable with a partner, being honest about his thoughts and feelings? It was hard. Harder than Liam thought it should be, for anyone. It was in these moments that Liam could see the broken parts of his boyfriend–could see just how the Dread Doctors destroyed him. 

Luckily, Liam was pretty good at reading the Chimera now–at translating Theo's expressions, at translating his silence and his gentle touches.

Liam was pretty good at understanding what Theo couldn’t say. In this case, it was simple: How did I ever get so lucky? How did I ever deserve you?

… It was a common thought for the Chimera, Liam knew. Because Theo, he saw Liam as truly good , and saw himself as truly… not. 

If only he could see himself the way Liam did, now. 

"I have," Liam said delicately, "the sweetest supernatural boyfriend in the entire world."

Theo squeezed his eyes shut tighter as he processed Liam's words. Then, slowly, he looked at Liam. "If you tell anyone, I'll deny it." Which translated to, thank you. Translated to, I like you so much. 

… Translated to I love you. 

Liam smiled. "I wouldn't expect anything less." I love you, too. 

Theo smiled, letting out a breathless chuckle. "You're just so…" he shook his head. Special. Theo pulled away, clearing his throat, before looking down at the bed of the truck and buying himself an out by grabbing the dropped snacks. "Come on, let's get comfy before the moon comes up fully." 

"Is that what we're doing here?" Liam asked, following Theo to the far back of the truck bed, "star gazing?" 

"Yeah. I mean… I don't know. I guess." 

"You guess?" 

Theo shrugged, but he wouldn't take his eyes away from the bags of snacks as he set them down. He then crouched down and began laying out the snacks. Wouldn't look up at Liam. 

Liam frowned. "Hey…" Liam reached out and grasped Theo's shoulder. "What's wrong?" 

Theo flinched. "Nothing. It's…" he paused before squeezing his eyes shut. "It's not a big deal, or anything. I just needed–I mean, wanted–to be with you, tonight.To… I don’t know." 

"No, hey. Hey." Liam moved so he was in front of him and could see Theo's face. "You know you can tell me anything." 

Theo did his best to hold in a flinch, though Liam could still see the briefest hint of the Chimera's muscles tensing. Eventually Theo let out a low sigh. "You know what tonight is, don't you?" 

"Yeah. It's a full moon." 

Theo frowned, opening his eyes to look at Liam. "It's not a full moon, Liam. It's a supermoon. " 

The word hit like a semi truck straight to the ribs, and Liam found himself at a loss for air. He pulled away unconsciously, his back hitting against the back of the truck. 

The supermoon. 

How did Liam forget about the supermoon? How had he been so fucking stupid? 

No, no, no. He shouldn't be here. Not here. Not while his senses and strength were heightened. He could hurt Theo. He could kill him. 

Liam moved away quickly, his heart beating rapidly against his chest. He could feel the shift, could feel the overwhelming sense of power. The beast was strong tonight–stronger than he was. 

It was good that he was away from people, away from innocent bystanders, but he was all too aware of the Chimera there within arm's reach. All too aware that he probably wouldn't even have time to react before Liam had his claws in him. 

"... I'm sorry," Theo whispered. He looked down at the bed of the truck. "I thought you knew. I thought–" Theo cut himself off as his voice trembled. He shook his head violently. "I'm sorry. I should've known you wouldn't want to be with me tonight. After I…" Theo squeezed his eyes shut. "I'm sorry. " 

Liam stared down at the Chimera, his eyes widening. 

Don't make me spend tonight alone. That had been what Theo had said, when he was standing outside Liam's house… When Liam was so worried about the full moon, he barely even noticed the desperation building in the Chimera. I just needed–I mean, wanted–to be with you tonight . 

Theo was doubled over on the truck bed, holding the edges of a fuzzy blanket in his balled up fists. His eyes were squeezed shut, a glistening of tears against his cheek. "I'm sorry. I just needed… but I should've known… " Theo swallowed thickly, his Adam's apple bobbing as he pushed down a sob. Translation: I should've known you wouldn't want to be with me tonight. Not after I tried to kill Scott on the supermoon. Tried to get you to do it, too. 

"No…" Liam rushed forward, falling to his knees in his rush to get to his boyfriend. "It's okay. It's okay. I'm-I'm here. I'm right here. I'm not… I'm not going anywhere. I'm here. " 

Theo shook his head slowly, swallowing down another sob before letting out a broken out gasp. "You didn't even want to come. You didn't want to be here. I bribed you. I–"

"I didn't want to come. I didn't. But that wasn't because of you. I mean, it was, but that's not–" Liam cut himself off, letting out a frustrated sigh. He couldn't ramble, not now. Not when Theo was spiraling. "Listen, I… I don't exactly like being out on the full moon. Being near people, being near anyone, it makes me nervous. I feel like at any moment, I'll just… I'll lash out. I don't have the control I used to. And you… I can't hurt you. Okay? I can't. I know you would heal, but I would never be able to live with myself, if I…" Liam shook his head. "But I never thought for a second that I'd be in danger, if I came out with you. I never thought that you would hurt me. " 

"I did, though. I have. I've hurt you. I…" Theo flinched violently, tugging at the blanket in his hands. "How do you even stand it? How can you even be near me?" 

"Because that… that wasn't you." Liam moved forward, reaching out to wipe tears away from Theo's cheek. He left his hand there, feeling the burned-up feel of Theo's skin. "That wasn't the same person you are now. You now, this you… You wouldn’t hurt me. I know you wouldn't. You… you've saved me. More than once. More than you can imagine." 

"No. That was still me . That…that was…" 

"That," Liam said gently, "was the version of you that the Dread Doctors crafted you into becoming. That was who they trained–who they manipulated you –into becoming. This, the person in front of me now, who sets up romantic dates, and shouts Taylor Swift lyrics at the top of his lungs, and buys me extra food and blankets when he barely has the money to spare… this is you. This is the person you choose to be." 

Theo let out a broken out whimper, looking up at Liam. His eyes were welling up with tears. "... but what if I'm… what if I'm both? What if I'm the guy who loves you, and the one who kills for power? What if… what if I hurt you, like I did on the supermoon before?" 

Liam let out a soft laugh, despite himself. "I don't think you have to worry about that, Theo." 

"Why not?" 

"Because," Liam paused before offering a small smile. "You just admitted that you loved me. And that you, he only loved himself." 

Theo's lip trembled as he searched Liam's eyes. Then, he rushed forward, throwing his arms around Liam. "I do. I love you." Theo buried his head in Liam's shoulder. "I love you. I love you. I love you." 

"I know. I know." Liam hesitated before wrapping his arms around Theo. There was something there, flooding through his skin, and for a moment he worried that the shift was climbing to the surface–that his control was slipping and the beast was seconds away from digging claws into Theo's back… But that buzzing feeling, it wasn’t the shift. It wasn't his beast . It was the electric feel of Theo against him, near him–that shock of life. Of love. 

He couldn't even feel the pulse of the shift against his skin–not now, not when his senses were already so overwhelmed by… by… 

"I love you, too," Liam whispered, a bit desperately. "I love you, too." 

Theo tightened his hold on Liam. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you it was a supermoon." 

"It doesn't matter, T. It doesn't matter." Liam kissed the top of Theo's head. "I'm sorry I freaked out." 

"It's okay." Theo said, quietly. 

They stayed like that for what felt like hours, not moving–not talking… just held in each other's embrace. 

Eventually, Theo pulled away. He wiped his tears away with the base of his palm. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I… I hope I didn't ruin our date." 

"Are you kidding? You could never." Liam offered Theo a tilted smile before looking up at the stars–the moon. "This is… still cozy. Still romantic." 

Theo hesitated before moving to Liam's side, then looked up at the stars, too. "I thought it might be," he said, softly. "To be honest, I… This is my first supermoon after my time in the Skinwalker Prison. I didn't want to be in Beacon Hills, near Scott and the pack. So I started planning this trip, to just… take the night and look up at stars–the moon. To try and remind myself that the supermoon doesn't mean anything–that it, and the Dread Doctors, don't have a hold on me anymore." Theo hesitated. "But the closer the day came, the more scared I got. The more I started to think, 'if I'm alone, with just my thoughts… the more likely that version of me is to come out.'" 

Liam frowned, turning to look at Theo–at his boyfriend. 

"I know it sounds… crazy. The moon doesn't affect Chimeras. Not like it affects real werewolves. But I still couldn't stop thinking that maybe it did have a hold on me. That the supermoon was going to pull that darker version of me to the surface." Theo looked away from the sky, down at the truck bed. There, he saw Liam's hand between them, and he moved to grab it, to hold it in his. "Yesterday, I realized that I… that you …" Theo paused, squeezing his eyes shut. "You make me feel… like I can be good. And I thought, 'maybe, if we were both here during the supermoon, your presence would be enough to ward off that side of me.'" 

Liam's eyes softened. "Theo, you don't need me to be good, or to… to ward off some kind of darkness. You are good. Okay? You are." 

Theo shook his head. "I'm not. I'm… trying. But it's you who makes me want to be a good person. Who makes me see how good, and pure, and amazing things in this world can be, and how important it is to keep it that way. How important it is to protect it rather than just… destroy it." Theo ran his thumb against Liam's hand, falling silent for a few seconds. "I think… I think you might be my anchor." Theo whispered, his words barely more than air. Like this sentence, this little secret admission… it was more important than I love you. More scary to admit. 

Maybe it was, because that confession sent a chill down Liam’s spine, goosebumps raising up his arms. 

Liam knew what an anchor was, and while he never had anything aside from a Buddhist mantra in the past, he knew how important anchors were to the supernatural. How… how anchors grounded them, gave them control. It was terrifying, to Liam--being an anchor, or having an anchor that was a living breathing thing. Because then that thing, that person , holds a level of control over you. It wasn’t smart , handing over control like that. The person could hurt you. Betray you. It wasn't smart , handing over control like that to someone like Theo Raeken. 

If Scott knew… if the pack knew… 

Still. Liam could feel the truth in his bones, pulsing through his very being. 

"Yeah," Liam breathed. "I… think you might be mine, too." 

Theo looked at Liam, his eyes growing wider, more concerned. "Are you sure?" He asked, but his voice was pleading, please say no, please say no, please say no. 

Liam's eyes softened, the concern in Theo’s voice wiping away any of Liam's own. "I'm sure," he breathed–because, it might not have been smart… but it was right. "You're my anchor." 

Theo frowned, studying Liam closely. Then, he slowly leaned forward, pressing his lips delicately against the beta's. The kiss was so gentle, so fragile, Liam almost didn't feel it. But he didn't dare deepen it, or pull away–didn't dare shatter that moment. 

"Thank you," Theo whispered. Liam assumed he meant thank you for trusting me… but it could've meant a lot of things. 

"I do love you, you know." Liam said. 

Theo hesitated before nodding. "I know." Liam expected his pulse to jump, for there to be some type of lie… but he couldn’t help but smile when it never came. "I love you, too." Theo added. 

"I know," Liam smiled--and let the silence carry to Theo the truth of it. Then, when Theo's cheeks reddened at the realization, Liam full on grinned and pulled Theo to him before collapsing onto his back, laying down against the blankets. "Now come on, let's enjoy your romantic set-up while we can." 

Theo collapsed onto Liam with a light "oof," then started to move–when suddenly he paused, staring down at Liam, his arms on either side of the Beta. "Ya know… I kind of enjoy this sight more." 

"Yeah?" Liam smirked up at the Chimera. "What do you like about it?" 

"Well…" Theo smirked, leaning in closer. "For starters, you have very kissable lips." 

Liam laughed, "Oh, is that it?" 

"For starters," Theo repeated with a widening smirk, before giving him a quick peck on the lips. "There's also your cute nose," he paused, kissing the top of Liam's nose, "and you're really cute when your cheeks get all red, like they are now." He kissed Liam's cheek. "Can't forget that rugged jawline." 

Liam couldn't help but giggle as Theo began to kiss at Liam's jawline. 

"Stop it, you little horndog," Liam laughed, pushing at Theo. 

"Excuse me, that's horn-coyote-wolf, thank you." 

Liam laughed. "Cut it out, you dork. Lay down with me. I want cuddles!" 

Theo laughed. "Only if you say that one more time." 

"What? That I want cuddles?" 

"Yeah," Theo's smirk softened into a small smile, "that." 

"Hmmm… pass." Liam said, then wrapped his arms around Theo, pulling him down onto his chest. 

"Oof," Theo breathed, "you gotta stop doing that." 

"No, I don't." 

"No," Theo agreed with a smile, "you don't." 

Finally, Theo rolled to Liam's side, close enough to still have his head on Liam's shoulder, and looked up at the stars. Liam wrapped his arm around Theo, resting his hand on his chest–his heart. Theo, perhaps unconsciously, brought his opposite hand up and rested it on Liam’s. 

They stayed like that, the two of them, just watching the stars–the supermoon–for what felt like hours. For what probably was hours. Liam didn’t want to move from his spot–didn't want to tear his eyes away from the full moon. 

It had been so long since he could actually look up at the full moon and feel anything but terror, concern. He had forgotten how big it was–how… beautiful. His beast, his wolf, was connected to it, and while that normally seemed like a terrible thing, since the moon connected with that monstrous side… really, there was also a pull, a connection that brought strength, brought power. Now, with his wolf content to lay in rest at the sound and feel of Theo's heartbeat next to him, he was able to see–to understand. He shouldn't fear the moon, just like Theo shouldn't fear the supermoon. It was playing its part in their lives, sure… but it wasn't bad. It simply was.

The first to break the silence was Theo. He did so without tearing his eyes away from the sky. "Is this what it feels like?" He breathed. "To… breathe freely?" 

Liam frowned, turning towards his boyfriend. But Theo didn’t seem upset, or sad, or anything. He seemed… free. 

Maybe that's what he meant, Liam realized. Because breathing always seemed to come at a cost for the Chimera. When he was young, he couldn't breathe properly–not with his severe asthma. And when he was with the Dread Doctors… every breath could've been his last. it was all reliant on how successful he was. And now, with the pack always breathing down his neck, always watching his every move… 

Liam turned away, bringing his eyes back up to the sky. "When it's just you and me, always." 

Theo squeezed Liam's hand. "We should do this again sometime." 

"Nah." Liam turned to Theo, watched for a few moments as the Chimera's cheeks grew red, then grinned. "I think we should do this every time. Every full moon." 

Theo smiled over at Liam, his eyes sparkling under the night sky. "It's a date."