Work Text:
giggle dirt
Nick needed some "me-time". After his four hour shift in which five separate women from the same bachelorette party/bar crawl ordered complicated, fruity drinks and left no tip, and he was completely exhausted. Seriously, who goes to The Griffin, of all places, to celebrate their impending nuptials? It is, by far, the least romantic bar in LA, Nick thought to himself. Yeah, he needed some time for himself.
He was planning on using his usual relaxation method of beer and reality show hate-watching, until he remembered his stash of weed and his little purple pipe he had been saving for a special occasion. This was special enough, he thought. He had the apartment to himself this friday night, Since Schmidt was on a date and was "prepared to close", Winston had a night shift at the radio company, and Jess was having a girl's night at Cece's. She was having a lot of those since she and Russel had called it quits.
He could practically hear Schmidt in his ear telling him how "Cannabis is for hippies", and how "Smoking dope makes you stupid". Clearly the D.A.R.E officers in Long Island were extremely persuasive.
He wondered what anti-drug initiatives were popular in Portland.
Jess had only been living at the loft for a month or two and yet he found himself missing her on nights when she had plans.
"Can't get much dumber, can I." Nick asked himself rhetorically as he made his way to his room. He changed out of his work clothes, grabbed his pipe, bud, grinder and lighter before walking back across the loft to set up shop on the couch.
Just as he passed the door, it opened.
Jess walked in, and immediately spotted the paraphernalia in Nick's hands. Her big blue eyes darted between him and the bong. Shit.
"..would you believe me if I said this was a musical instrument?" Nick asked, his eyes narrow.
Jess considered her response. "..what would the lighter be for, then?" She answered.
"Candles?" Nick shrugged.
Jess cocked her head and pursed her lips. She looks like a puppy , Nick thought. God, he wasn't even high and yet his heart still fluttered at the look on her face.
They stared at each other for a moment.
"So.. you smoke weed." Jess said, trying to exhibit nonchalance.
".. Yeah. Yeah- I mean, not a lot. Just since law school." Nick responded.
"Since college, I guess." He clarified.
"High school." He explained further. Jess just kept staring at him.
"8th grade, probably." He admitted. "You said you hate drugs, though, so I just figured
I'd keep doing it in secret?" Nick blurted out. Why are you trying so hard to accommodate her? he thought to himself.
"It's fine, Nick, it's not my business. You're an adult. That was mostly hyperbolic, anyway. I.. I've done weed. From time to time." Jess explained, shifting her weight between her ballet flats.
Nick raised his eyebrows. "Really?"
"Yeah! I've partaken in.. marijuana. What, you don't think I'm cool enough?" Jess asked.
"No, no, I just didn't take you for the type- not that I'm 'the type', you know, I just smoke once in a while to clear my head."
More awkward silence hung in the air.
"What happened to your girl's night?" Nick asked. It was only 9pm and usually her 'girl's nights' went on much later.
"Oh it was super fun, I was just feeling stressed out about school stuff so I figured I'd head home to get a head-start on some grading." Jess clarified. Her eyes darted back to the pipe, still in his hand.
After her eyes lingered, he finally asked "Do you want some?"
She considered it for a moment. "Why not!" She answered.
They made their way over to the couch. Nick got up to fill the bong with fresh water, and Jess put reruns of ‘Seinfeld’ on the TV.
They sat across from each other, and Nick made quick work of packing the bowl for the two of them. He lit the herb and took two long drags, exhaling slowly. He then passed the bong to Jess, and upon seeing the slightly nervous look on her face, asked "No good?"
"I don't know how to do it," She replied, sheepishly.
"Oh, that's fine. Come here." He said, his eyelids already becoming heavier.
She shuffled across the couch to sit next to him, their legs touching.
"I just want a little bit." Jess explained as she got comfortable next to him.
Nick smiled and handed her the bong. He then brought his lighter up to the bowl. "Inhale." He directed.
She brought her lips up to the rim and inhaled. He removed the bowl, and she kept inhaling. He willed himself to stop looking at her mouth. After about five seconds he realized she was still breathing in smoke. His eyes widened.
He waited a few more seconds before instructing her that she was "probably good".
Jess slowly backed away and slowly exhaled the smoke. For a few seconds she felt completely serene, and Nick couldn't help but think how pretty she looked. Before Jess fell into a coughing fit.
"Oh, let me grab you some water," He said, giggling slightly before making his way to the kitchen. He handed her a mug that read "Gone crazy, be back shortly" filled with lukewarm water. She took a few sips and simply stated "I feel like Lindsay Lohan."
After a few episodes of Seinfeld and a family size bag of Funyuns being devoured, Nick had a warm fuzzy feeling in his stomach that he chalked up to his inebriated state. He then realized that he had been staring at Jess for at least ten minutes, and she had noticed. She was staring right back. Even though her eyelids were drooping somewhat significantly, her big blue eyes still seemed intoxicating to him.
"You're so pretty, Jess". Nick blurted out. Did those words just come out of my mouth? The fuck is wrong with me??!! He asked himself.
Jess's smile widened. "Really? You think so?" She asked, adding fuel to the fire inside Nick's chest.
"Yeah, Day. Your eyes are like.. huge. You could probably see into space with those things." He replied.
"Everyone can see into space, Nick," Jess responded, giggling.
"Whatever. Russel is stupid." He answered. Shit, did I really just say that?
"It's ok, I'm over it." She lied. "We should murder him."
"Can't, I love him too much." He replied. They both fell into giggles.
They sat in silence for a few minutes that seemed like hours to both of them.
Jess sighed. "Okay, I think it's bedtime. I didn't actually grade anything so I'll have to catch up tomorrow." She said, standing up.
He smiled up at her, still staring.
"You're really handsome, Nick." Jess said.
"Little ol' me? Really?" Nick asked, a hand on his chest, partly to act faux-modest and partly as an attempt to calm his fast-beating heart.
"Of course! You're supes cute. If you got more regular haircuts, who knows.." She responded. They both laughed.
They stared at each other for a little longer. Jess spoke first.
"Good night, Miller".
"Hey, g'night, Day-"
Just then, the door slammed open, breaking the tension. Schmidt entered, his eyes darting between them and the bong set on the table.
"What have you HOOLIGANS been doing in here?" Schmidt asked, almost yelling.
"Schmidtty! How was your date?" Nick asked, just relieved he had an excuse to stop looking at Jess.
"I don't wanna talk about it. Never sleeping with a Shiksa again." He explained, already walking to his room.
--
Later that evening, Nick was still awake, hugging his pillow, thinking about how much fun he had with that beautiful soul residing across the hall from him.
He wouldn't know, but Jess was doing the same thing.