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They had been out for almost a year now, well into the start of spring. It was getting warmer, if only marginally, and if they had luck they could find patches of grass on their walks. The trio sat in the living room, pressed against each other on the too-small couch. It had been a long seven months. Full of ups and downs, mostly downs.
They didn't talk about ‘before’ often, it was a sensitive topic for all of them. None of them remembered ‘before’, or at least nothing beyond blurry ideas and quick flashes that could kindly be called memories. It bothered them to different degrees, though who it bothered most was irrelevant. But something had been on Ranboo’s mind for a while now, and two am felt like a better time than any to broach the topic
“Do you guys remember your birthday?” His sentence started loud but ended quietly, the other two shifting slightly. Maybe it was actually a bad idea to even ask.
Sneeg shrugged, “Nah, no idea.”
“I haven't even thought about it actually.”
The room went quiet for a second, it was hard to tell if it was a tense silence or not. Ranboo stared at the floor
“Why do you ask?”
“Well... I don't know. I thought about it during Christmas… ” he trailed off. Christmas had been an odd event. They didn't have money to spare for decorations or gifts, barely having enough to splurge on slightly more fancy food. “And then there's Easter stuff now. I guess I just started thinking about holidays. And birthdays are holidays I think? And everyone has one. Except…”
The rest of the sentence went unsaid and the room went silent again. That happened a lot, especially during conversations like this. But Ranboo was rarely the one to start them. And somehow that made it feel worse. Filling the silence seemed like a good idea but he couldn't find the words to say.
Charlie did it for him.
“You think we can just assign ourselves a birthday?” Sneeg laughed, head hitting the back of the couch with a soft thud, causing Ranboo to laugh too. Charlie just puffed his chest out, “Don't laugh at me! What's stopping us?”
“The law?”
“Well obviously I didn't mean legally! Just between us.”
Ranboo paused, shifting forward to look at Charlie over Sneeg, “It might be nice… I mean everyone has a birthday.”
And so they each chose a birthday. There was very little logic to the day or month. It came to whatever sounded interesting. Sneeg chose one in January, Charlie chose September and Ranboo chose August.
.
Ranboos first birthday as Sneeg and Charlie- and only them- had been calling it, was also the first one of the group. They had mostly forgotten about their idea until it came up on the calendar, and immediately the other two had set off to figure out what you even do for a birthday.
Several things were crossed off immediately. They still hadn't made any friends between them so ‘invite people over’ was out. ‘Planning a surprise party’ wasn't possible when they spent 98% of their days within earshot of each other, and the idea of sudden events didn't sit well with them either. Gifts didn't seem reasonable either given the tight budget they were on.
By the end of their hours-long research (mostly due to the old-as-hell computer and spotty internet) they decided baking a cake and spending the day watching movies was a good plan. Even if it didn't change their routine much.
A few days before his birthday, they had gone to the store. They had made it routine now to go to the local 24-hour store at nearly 2 am every two weeks or so. It was always quiet then, only them and the two workers who they now knew by name. This trip was the same as always, they knew what they were there for.
On the way to the pasta- the go-to cheap food- they passed a stand that wasn't there two weeks ago when they last came in.
There were- probably knock-offs given the price- stuffed animals. Ranboo stopped to look for a moment, eyes landing on a stuffed dog. It looked- objectively and affectionately- rather stupid. The eyes were slightly uneven, almost cross-eyed, and the smile was lopsided.
“Whatcha looking at?” Charlie was standing beside him now, Sneeg standing a few feet away.
He grabbed the dog off the shelf, holding him up to the others, grinning under the mask, “Look at this guy! He looks so silly.”
The other two laughed, Charlie, patting the toy's head. “He has no brain cells.”
“Hey, he's just like you!” It was clearly a joke insult. Ranboo still frowned and dramatically held the dog so it was beside Sneeg’s head.
“I don't know, seems a lot more like you.”
Sneeg gasped, putting a hand to his chest, “How dare you!”
They were laughing now, maybe a bit too loud for the otherwise silent store.
“Alright, we got things to buy.”
Ranboo sighed, putting the dog back on the shelf, pausing for a moment. It was silly looking, sure, but it was enduring. But he knew that it was nowhere near the tight budget and let it go.
The rest of the shopping trip was routine. Though at one point, Sneeg had separated from the group. Claiming he forgot something a few aisles over. He had disappeared for well over five minutes, long enough to cause Ranboo to worry. But before he could even try to ask Charlie to go look for him he had returned, saying he couldn't find it. Ranboo had tried to question him further but was given decent enough excuses and the distraction of cake flavours. Ultimately, they returned home with their usual groceries and a box of chocolate cake mix and some icing.
.
The day started as it usually did, Ranboo sat straight up from a dead sleep, breath caught in their throat. Sneeg, who wasn't really asleep- and never was- sat up with him, muttering a reassurance he always did. They settled back into bed, Ranboo curling up between the others until Charlie eventually woke up. The trio made their way into the kitchen, Sneeg putting toast in the toaster and turning the coffee pot on. They sat in silence as they ate. It was comfortable and routine.
Eventually, as always, Charlie broke the silence. “Happy birthday Ran”
They looked over from their coffee, laughing a bit, “That's today?”
“You chose it and you still forget?”
“Yes Sneeg I did!”
The morning and well into noon was spent on the couch, the laptop set up on the coffee table open to some pirating website. Ranboo got the first pick on the movies, deciding on a Studio Ghibli movie. They had seen it nearly ten times now but there were no complaints
By mid-afternoon, they had gotten bored of movies.
Charlie, having been bored sitting still well before the others, stood up. “We should make that cake if we want to eat it after supper.”
“It's not making it to after dinner and you know it.” Sneeg didn't move, if anything he sunk back into the couch more.
Ranboo rolled his eyes, standing up, “It can make it past dinner if we eat early.”
Sneeg made some noise of protest but Charlie and Ranboo were already in the kitchen, pulling bowls and eggs out of the fridge. By the time Sneeg finally joined them they had put everything out on the counter. The trio stood staring at everything for a moment.
“So does anyone know how to make a cake?” The room was silent. “Alright. Guess we are learning!”
With the help of the- very clear- instructions on the box, they had managed to make something resembling a cake. Several times they had managed to mix milk with oil and spent about 10 minutes picking egg shells out after Charlie insisted he could do it with one hand. It was by no definition pretty, the icing was unevenly dyed and even more unevenly spread on the cake, and the sprinkles seemed to pile in the center of the cake. But it was a cake, and they had made it together.
They skipped actual dinner. The logic being that cake had at least one food group- it was a weak excuse but all they needed to justify it.
They settled back on the couch again, silent for a moment. They had spent the last 3 hours talking and frankly, Ranboo was content to sit staring off at the wall for a while. Ten minutes passed before Sneeg stood up suddenly, announcing that he ‘needed to piss.’ He smiled- an unconvincing one that said he was up to something- and disappeared behind the couch. Ranboo turned to look over his shoulder, hoping to catch where he was going, only for Charlie to loudly clear his throat.
“So! How was your day?”
He raised an eyebrow but turned to face him. “What are you two doing?”
“I don't know what you mean.” He glanced down the hallway, another bad lie. Were these two really that bad at lying?
“Charlie.”
“We aren't doing anything! I don't know what you're talking about.”
“You're a bad liar.”
“Whaaaat-”
“Rouse is over Charlie!” Sneeg came back down the hallway, sitting back in his spot in the middle. He had a- poorly- wrapped box in his hands. He held it out to Ranboo, who hesitantly took it, turning it in his hand.
“What's this?”
“A gift.”
He looked up from it, unsure what to do for a moment. What do you do with a gift anyways? They slowly pulled the paper off and opened the box underneath it. Inside was the stuffed dog with the lopsided smile. He pulled it out, smiling as he turned to look at the other two. “Wait when did you get this? Why?”
Charlie was grinning, leaning towards him. “It's your birthday, you get gifts on birthdays.” He said it like it was a simple fact of life and not a reality-shattering statement. “And we saw you looking at it.”
He looked between them and the gift, unsure of what to say. He hadn't been expecting anything like this, and as far as he could remember he had never even received a gift. Though he supposed that he couldn't remember a birthday at all. The fact he had gotten cake and movies had been more than a surprise- he knew the budget they were on. All he could do was stare down at the gift, caught between emotions they could place.
“Ranboo?”
Their head shot up, suddenly aware that they had gone silent for far too long. They tried to stutter something out but abandoned it immediately, instead pulling them both into a hug. It was uncomfortable, the couch in no way helping, but that wasn't a concern yet. Instead, he buried his head between the two. There was a soft laugh before the hug was returned. Warm and familiar.
“Thank you.”