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Jasper was crying. Again. Gabe knew having a kid was going to be different. He knew they were going to cry and poop and eat. But he had no idea his baby was going to cry this much. Gabe had finally gotten little Jasper settled again and back in bed, when the soft cries of his son reached Gabe’s ears again. Gabe chuckled dryly to himself and sighed softly. He looked over at his wife sleeping soundly and knew it was still his turn to answer Jasper’s cries.
He groaned as he sat back up, “I’m coming, I’m coming.” He whispered, easily reaching Jasper’s crib and picking him up to hold him close. “Come on, buddy. We can’t wake your mom up. She barely sleeps on a good day.”
Gabe carried Jasper out to the kitchen, bouncing and shushing him on the way. It wasn’t what he wanted or needed apparently as his cries continued.
“Come on, buddy. Come on, it’s okay.” Gabe begged his tiny baby, feeling his own frustration rising.
“Late night?” Dean came into the kitchen, his hair sticking up and roused from sleep.
Gabe jumped, looking over at Dean quickly with eyes wide and tired. “Uh, yeah. Sorry if he woke you up. Turns out fledglings aren’t the same as human babies.” Gabe laughed, still trying to calm Jasper down.
Dean laughed, “Pass him over.” He held his arms out to accept his nephew.
Gabe happily passed his still crying baby over. “He gets it from Sam, I swear.”
“Oh yeah, I know. Sam used to be the biggest cry baby I knew.” Dean gave him a smile, the first genuine smile he had ever given Gabe.
Gabe shifted slightly, not used to seeing any positive emotion on Dean’s face. “Yeah, she still is sometimes. I’m worried she’ll get postpartum depression.” Gabe sighed, “I mean, she’s already susceptible to that kinda stuff and I don’t want her to have to go through all of that. Not after everything else.” Gabe blinked and remembered who he was talking to. There’s no way Dean of all people would want to hear all his thoughts. “Sorry, it’s just not easy being human for all of this. I couldn’t just heal her after the birth, I can’t stay up all night and do everything for her.”
Dean smiled again, still bouncing Jasper around as he held him. Dean had never seen this side of Gabe. He only saw the Trickster or the archangel. Now he saw Gabe Winchester, the man his sister fell in love with. “Let me know if I can help you with any of that. We don’t need Sam to be stuck with the baby blues too.”
“Oh- Oh yeah, thanks, Dean.” Gabe blinked again, starting to wonder if the sleep deprivation was getting to him.
Dean laughed softly, “You wondering why I’m being nice to you?”
Gabe let out a huffed laugh, “Yeah, a little bit.”
“Well,” Dean started, his voice soft not wanting to disturb the now sleeping baby. “We all know you used to be a dickhead,” Gabe laughed in agreement as Dean continued, “Then you died and I thought good riddance. Then years later you were dumped at our doorstep. I’d never seen Sam look at anyone like she was looking at you. I’d never seen her actually look after someone like she looked after you. And I was pissed. Pissed she settled on you. Cause as soon as you were better, I thought you were going to run off to some other poor girl you had wrapped around your finger. But you stayed. You stayed and you helped us finally fix the world. After that, I thought you’d leave again. But you didn’t. You stuck around. Married Sam, knocked her up, everything.” Dean cleared his throat, his gaze moving from his nephew to his brother in law, “And then I swore you were gonna leave and I was ready to pick up the pieces. I was gonna help Sam get through it all. But.. I didn’t need to. She doesn’t need me anymore cause she has you. And you’re actually doing a good job. You love her, you love the kid. I see that now.”
Gabe sat in stunned silence, not even noticing the tears that were on his cheeks. His heart was so full and he was so tired, his poor emotions couldn’t help but overflow. Gabe had so many brothers and sisters. He had older brothers he practically worshiped and younger siblings he was dedicated to raising. But he had never had an older sibling actually care about him. Maybe that was one of the reasons he had never liked Dean, Gabe was jealous he had never had anything like that. But now he did. He had an older brother who’d look out for him and help him. It filled a hole in his heart that he didn’t know was there.
“Thanks, Dean..” Gabe wiped his cheeks, “Sorry, I don’t know what it feels like to not have a shitty older brother.”
Dean laughed, “Well, get used to it. I’m definitely not going anywhere.” He bounced Jasper up and down a few more times, holding him just a little bit closer. “You get to bed, Gabe. I got him.”
“Huh? You sure? I can take him back with me. What’s one sleepless night.” Gabe rubbed his eyes, ready to take his baby back.
“Go get some sleep. Jas and I will be fine.”
“Jas? Are we really sticking with that nickname?” Gabe teased, standing up, much too tired to fight Dean on the matter.
“Jeez you’re as stubborn as Sam. Just go to bed.” Dean pushed Gabe’s shoulder in the direction of his room. “We’ll see you in the morning.”
Gabe smiled, heading back to his room, a warmth spreading over him. He wasn’t alone. He had Sam, Cas, Jasper, and now Dean. He had his own little family and they loved him and looked after him. A few more tears left his eyes as he realized how lucky he was and that he was finally going to be able to sleep.
He quietly got back into bed and found his usual spot cuddled up against Sam’s back, holding her to him with an arm around her waist. Content washed over his as he laid there. This is his home. This is his life. And he wouldn’t trade it for anything.