Chapter Text
call me maybe soon added resident cat and i meow to a group chat
[16:52]
call me maybe soon renamed the chat to ‘furry convention’
resident cat: what the hell is this
call me maybe soon: what does it look like? it’s a group chat obviously
resident cat: no i meant the chat name
resident cat: why are we furries
call me maybe soon: aren’t we?
call me maybe soon: we have two cats and a tiger
resident cat: oh crap
resident cat: mayhaps you have a point??????
i meow: is this about the guy in your music class?
call me maybe soon: JEON WONWOO THE LOVE OF MY LIFE
call me maybe soon: YOURE THE ONLY ONE WHO UNDERSTANDS ME
i meow: please no
i meow: i have a boyfriend
call me maybe soon: yes yes we know. kim mingyu, the light of your life, the only one you will ever love, the buffest and hottest guy on campus, your precious baby
call me maybe soon: we are aware of your beautiful love life
resident cat: careful soonyoung
resident cat: your jealousy is showing
call me maybe soon: SHUT UP IM NOT JEALOUS
resident cat: definitely jealous
call me maybe soon: wen junhui you have no right to say anything
call me maybe soon: i’m not the one creepily hounding mingyu for information about his best friend
resident cat left the chat
call me maybe soon: bruh
call me maybe soon added resident cat to group chat ‘furry convention’
call me maybe soon: sore loser
resident cat: i didn’t come here to be attacked okay
call me maybe soon: i speak only the truth
i meow: soonyoung are you any better?
i meow: you stare creepily at your music boy every class and then you whine about not being able to talk to him
i meow: when you don’t even TRY to talk to him
call me maybe soon: wow where is the love????
i meow: reserved for one person only and that person is not you
call me maybe soon: WE GET IT
resident cat: WE GET IT
i meow: heh losers
call me maybe soon removed i meow from group chat ‘furry convention’
call me maybe soon: much better
resident cat: wait but that’s that he’d want
call me maybe soon: oh shit u right
call me maybe soon added i meow to group chat ‘furry convention’
i meow: YOU TOOK AWAY MY PEACE AND QUIET
call me maybe soon: jun you glorious bastard you were right
resident cat: ofc i was, i’m always right
call me maybe soon: waiT are we ever gonna talk about my crisis or are we gonna keep ignoring me????????
i meow: keep ignoring you
resident cat: keep ignoring you
call me maybe soon: why did i even ask
call me maybe soon: ANYWAY
call me maybe soon: I WENT TO THE COFFEE SHOP ON CAMPUS RIGHT
call me maybe soon: AND THEN I SAW HIM WORKING
call me maybe soon: HES SO HOT????? HES JUST STIRRING COFFEE BUT HELLO ID LET HIM BREAK MY BONES
resident cat: oh wow okay
resident cat: he’s got it bAD
i meow: i have no more words for this
call me maybe soon: gOOD keep quiet then
call me maybe soon: anD THEN HE SAID SOONYOUNG AND I SWEAR I ALMOST SWOONED
i meow: um maybe because that’s your name?? and he’s calling out your order??????
call me maybe soon: i hAve nO mORe wOrdS fOr THiS— stfu jeon wonwoo that’s not the pOINT
call me maybe soon: THE POINT IS. HES A BARISTA AT MY FAVOURITE COFFEE SHOP
call me maybe soon: DO WE SEE A PROBLEM WITH THIS???
resident cat: other than the fact that soonyoung is a simp and this will only fuel his caffeine addiction? no
call me maybe soon: IT MEANS I CANT RUN DOWN TO GET COFFEE AT 4AM WHILE LOOKING LIKE A MESS ANYMORE
call me maybe soon: WHAT IF I RUN INTO HIM WHEN IM UGLY
resident cat: when you’re ugly? oh so everyday?
call me maybe soon: RUDE MF
resident cat: kidding
resident cat: you’re the hottest guy on campus, aside from
call me maybe soon: minghao?
resident cat: minghao
i meow: and mingyu
resident cat: i like how wonwoo popped back in only to mention his bf
resident cat: it appears we have two simps here instead of one
i meow: three**
resident cat: i’m going to bite you
i meow: better ask minghao if he’s into that
call me maybe soon: gUYS CONCENTRATE
call me maybe soon: we’re talking about me, stfu about ur lovers
resident cat: you stfu about ur lover
resident cat: so he works at the coffee shop. big deal. if he’s judging you by your looks at 4am, then dump his shitty ass
resident cat: he’s just a shallow bastard who has the personality of a wet plastic bag if he can’t see how amazing you are
call me maybe soon: :’)
call me maybe soon: i knew it
call me maybe soon: junhui loves me
resident cat: don’t make me take it all back, you deranged tiger
i meow: you threaten him, yet you still entertain his tiger delusions nonetheless
i meow: also. he can’t dump him if they never dated in the first place………….
resident cat: wowwwwww way to ruin the mood won
i meow: i’m being logical
i meow: clearly we lack some of that in this chat
resident cat: if you were logical, you wouldn’t have befriended us in the first place
i meow: …………………………….
call me maybe soon: checkmate
call me maybe soon: we know you love us, just admit it
i meow: i’d rather lick my toes
resident cat: kinky ;)))
i meow: wen junhui tainting this chat with his bedroom kinks
i meow: go figure
i meow: and btw, minghao is coming over for dinner with us and i *happened* to mention an idiot friend of mine joining us
i meow: looks like i’ll have to tell him my friend fell into a toilet or something and won’t be able to make it :)))
resident cat: YOU EVIL BITCH
resident cat: I CANT BELIEVE YOURE TELLING ME THIS TWO HOURS BEFORE
resident cat: I LOOK LIKE A GREASY WEASEL
i meow: that’s what you always look like tho
resident cat: FUCK YOU
resident cat: I THINK JEONGHAN TOOK MY SWEATER AGAIN
resident cat: WHAT DO I WEAR NOW????
call me maybe soon: nothing
call me maybe soon: maybe he’ll drool over you and then you guys can bang
call me maybe soon: done. happy ending
resident cat: not everyone’s a hoe like you kwon soonyoung
call me maybe soon: that’s rich, coming from YOU
resident cat: wdym i’m an innocent christian boy
i meow: *snorts so hard i lose a lung*
resident cat: how does that even— actually don’t answer that
resident cat: I STILL DONT KNOW WHAT TO WEAR
i meow: just wear a goddamn different sweater
i meow: the one with the cat in the corner
resident cat: that one has a stain
i meow: ITS BLACK
i meow: NO ONE CAN SEE IT
resident cat: okAY OKAY FINE
i meow: you better do the dishes to repay me
resident cat: sure :))))
i meow: ……..why is he so enthusiastic about doing the dishes?
resident cat: i can’t guarantee you’ll have any dishes left tho :)))))))
i meow: i can’t guarantee i won’t set minghao up with a nice boy from my class tho :))))))
i meow: how about seokmin? he’s a nice guy. cute too
resident cat: jeon wonwoo istg
call me maybe soon: i like how this chat progressed from me gay panicking to jun gay panicking
resident cat: i’m bi
call me maybe soon: okay and???
call me maybe soon: are you not gay panicking rn?
resident cat: i hate it when you’re right
call me maybe soon: to quote your words: “i’m always right”
resident cat renamed the chat to ‘gay panicking furries’
i meow: may lord give me strength