Chapter Text
Quirks are curses, simply said.
they give people a power they don’t deserve. a power that hurts many. at least that's what izuku believed. it was how his quirk worked, it was how his friends quirk worked. it was how any and every villain and hero’s quirk izuku had ever known worked.
yeah hero’s helped, they saved, but it didn’t change the fact that people would be hurt because of their power.
the top hero’s for example, all might and endeavour, always had very high casualty rates and even bigger collateral damage than any other hero. their power was far too overwhelming even if they did use it for good. oftentimes hurting or even killing civilians and villains.
then there were those with curses, quirks, who didn’t physically hurt anyone, but rather emotionally. his own quick quirk would fall under this category.
static paralysis, the name that now sat antagonistically on quirk registry papers izuku couldn’t even see. he doesn’t think it’s a totally appropriate name, if anything it should be called what it actually was and did.
sleep paralysis.
izuku could forcibly put someone into a state of sleep paralysis. a person's body would get heavy and stiff, inhibiting any movement, leaving every piece of them affected by this static feeling, even their eyesight. their vision tunnels until nothing but a static screen is left. then, depending on the person, vivid and rather unsettling hallucinations would appear.
how did izuku come to realise the existence of his quirk you may ask? what exactly made him realise he was cursed, why he thought quirks were curses.
maybe it was less what he had come to realise and more what he’d been told all that time ago.
a few days after his fourth birthday. like any other normal day, until things go dark.
-
“mom, i’m going to go play with my new toys outside, okay!” a starry eyed child exclaims as he comes running from his room. long green and back curls bounce with every little movement he makes.
“okay baby, keep the door open so i can keep an eye on you alright?” the just as starry-eyed mother responds, her own green curls being weighed down to something more wavy.
the boy nods, scurrying to the door with toys in hand. he didn’t have many toys, something the boy had not cared much about, but always made his mother frown at. she had always wanted to get him more but when you struggled to put food on the table it hadn’t been much of an option.
“oh! and if you see the bakugou’s tell them hello, okay!” the woman yells after the boy's exiting form, barely getting a response as the boy disappears outside. all inko can do is smile, turning to start preparing food for the night.
the day was cool, odd for a summers day but nice nonetheless. izuku was beaming, just as excited as he’d been when receiving the toys he held so dear a few days ago.
izuku wandered over to a tree he often enjoyed playing under, dropping the toys from his arms gently onto the grass. he smiles down at the three action figures, each a different hero, and the one doll he’d asked his mother to make. on the grass floor staring up at the boy lay an all might figure, an ingenium figure, and a mandalay figure which he hoped he could get the other wild wild pussycat figures or go with. then the doll, it was a little scrappy but it was of an underground hero izuku had found more recently, erasurehead. izuku had seen the hero on the street on evening near home and even if the hero hadn’t noticed he’d saved izuku from some flying debris with his scarf. from that day own izuku had been obsessed, even if he’d only seen the man a few weeks before his birthday.
the doll looked rushed, which it was, considering izuku had spent days looking for eraserhead merchandise online and got nothing and cried to his mother upon finding out underground hero’s didn’t really have fans.
so izuku plopped himself down on the grass, picking up each of the toys and playing with the utmost care and attention. he adored these toys, adored heroes. he wanted to be one.
and with most hero’s, especially great heroes, they have to have some kind of struggle. something they must overcome.
izuku quirk was just the kind of obstacle the world decided to throw at him.
there on the grass, with his so few toys, is when the world has changed right in front of him. when things got dark.
izuku hadn’t noticed anything at first, had noticed how the tips of his figures had begun to go numb. an itchy sensation beginning to grow until it started climbing up his fingers. he didn’t really notice until his figures began to twitch, a trembling following. he hadn’t noticed much until the sensations creeps up to his palms and left his hands trembling and spamming, making him drop the toy in his hand.
he wasn’t paying attention to the toys anymore. didn’t look down to the grass where they’d fallen. now he stared at his trembling hands, watching as fingers twitched as though he was gripping something too tightly. what was happening?
the sensation didn’t stop at the boys wrists, it creeped up his forearms, reaching his elbows in nearly no time. as the numb, itchy, feeling grew higher on the boys arms he began to panic. his arms felt heavy, like a weight had been placed on the numb area. his arms only got heavier as the sensation continued to climb higher and higher until it reached his shoulders. by that point the boy was beginning to cry, watching as twitching fingers lay on the grass under trembling arms and the weight of what felt like another human on his shoulders dragging him down.
he could barely move his arms, feeling as stiff as metal and weighing just about as much. izuku was panicking, trying and failing to pull his arms off the ground but to no avail. izuku only cries harder when he feels the numbness crawl along his spine, making him sit up straighter. when he tries to bend over again, allowing the weight of his shoulders and arms drag him onto the grass, he gasps out in pain. his breathing picked up with each second the sensation plagued another part of his torso. he needed to do something quickly. what was happened to him?
stiffly as ever izuku’s turned his head to his front door. if he listened closely, ignoring his gross little sniffles, he could hear his mother humming inside. she needed to get to her, she would help him, she was an adult she would know what to do.
izuku shifts, the small movement sending a prickly sensation over every inch of izuku 's plagued body, only making the odd itch worse. izuku grimaces at the feeling, recognising it from the times he’d sat on his feet too long and was left to wait for the pins and needles that prodded at his skin to fade before moving.
izuku tries not to sob as he makes it to his feet, off balanced with how his upper body weighs down on him, making his legs shake even if they hadn’t gone numb just yet. izuku moves towards the door, notices how his body moves awkwardly, how he staggers and the numb sensation rushes down his legs quicker.
izuku can’t stop himself from sobbing as his thighs are overtaken then, them too being prodded by itching pins. izuku is barely able to take another step before he stumbles, limply falling to the ground with a yelp. he awkwardly catches himself on his knees, arms in front of him and barely holding up his weighed down torso.
the sensation continues to spread, poking at his legs like millions of tiny spiders. as these spiders crawl down his shins another sensation is brought to izuku’s attention.
the numbness was moving up his neck.
he hated the feeling. it had felt the same as the spiders but far worse. it was more than simple poking, it was a stabbing pain. each leg of the metaphorical spider digging into the back of his neck, slowly, painfully, working their way up to the back of his head and spreading agonisingly slow towards his face.
by the time the sensation had reached his face, izuku could barely hold back his sobs. the painful numbness had reached his ears, making his growing sobs grow louder. everything sounded so far away and echoey, even his cries didn’t sound like his own anymore.
just as he began to feel the numbness slow, the feeling fading as though it’s completed its mission, his mother emerged from the house. everything spiralled away.
as static began to tunnel in his vision. stealing away the light of the setting sun from the sobbing boy. within a second his vision was gone. his vision was gone and his sobbing echoed loudly in his mind. he could hear his frantic mother but she too sounded far away, her calls vibrating in his chest.
all he could do was sob harder.
what was happening to him?
if izuku could go back in time, he’d probably ask this part of his story to be changed. ask that his mother never do what she’d done that day. beg whatever gods had given him his curse to take it back, to leave him with nothing if it meant erasing this memory he couldn’t seem to get rid of.
“izuku? IZUKU!” the boy can hear his mother yelling, distress evident in her tone even if it echoed in the emptiness of izuku head. she was coming to help him.
“mom, mom please help, i can’t see, i can’t see anything, it’s dark.” izuku sobs trying to move his eyes but only seeing more white and grey static.
“i can’t see, i can’t see, everything is gone!” izuku wails, wanting to pull his body up to find his mother but the weight of his body is keeping him glued to the ground. his body ached, stiffening in an uncomfortable way that izuku couldn’t help but sob over.
“mom? mom, where do you go? i can’t see mom please.” izuku babbles, tripping up on words as tears brush past his lips along with running snot. izuku can feel how his body shakes, arms barely keeping him up at that point.
“IZUKU BABY WHAT HAPPENED?” if izuku’s body didn’t feel as though it weighed four times his own weight he probably would have flinched at his mothers voice. she was clearly close now if her loud, frantic, cry had anything to say about it. the sound even louder than his own echoing sobs.
“i can’t see.” izuku sobs again, feeling how his body trembles and convulses with his sobs. his chest felt tight, as though trying to constrict his airways. his panic spirals further and further with each wheeze. he just wanted his mother, just wanted her to hold him while he sobbed. he wanted the prickly little sensations to disappear just as his vision had. and god did he want his vision to come back.
“mom help, i don’t know what’s happening.” izuku choked out, feeling how his lips were too numb to keep spit from slipping free. he could tell he looked like a mess, tears and snot running down his face.
“baby, baby breathe with me okay? i need you to calm down. i don’t, what happened?” inko tried to sooth the boy, reaching out to gently touch his head of curls.
“i— i can’t, it hurts.” izuku wheezes, nearly collapsing when he feels the pressure of his mothers hand.
“okay baby okay, let me call someone okay? we will figure this out. i need you to try and calm down okay.” izuku can hear how his mothers voice trembles. she too had been panicking over the situation but knew she had to pull herself together.
“i’m going to call a doctor, okay? what do you need me to do to make it easier to breathe? what all hurts?” inko asks frantically, pulling her hand away to try and get a better look at the boy and grab her phone.
“i don’t know, i don't know, it just hurts, and i can’t see. everything is so heavy. i just, i want to see you, where are you mom, please.” izuku cried harder, feeling hysterical with the loss of his mothers contact.
“ok, it’s okay baby, i’m calling a doctor, how about we try laying you down okay?” inko offers hands hovering over izuku shoulders, waiting for a go ahead. the phone was ringing.
“okay, ok yeah.” izuku agrees with a choked wheeze, not exactly able to move himself.
“tell me if anything hurts okay?” his mothers voice softens. izuku can hear the phone ringing louder know, clear on speak and placed to the side.
after a moment izuku can feel a sort of pressure bloom in his shoulders. his mother, she was still right there, even if her touch was numbed by whatever kept him stiffened to the ground.
“there we go easy.” inko whispers. it takes a second for izuku to realise she was easing over, tilting him onto his hip and soon his side.
that’s when it happened.
when every little piece of izuku froze. when he could feel every millimetre of numbed skin tense up and relax in a manner of seconds. when the once growing sensation of uncontrollable discomfort washes away like a message in the sand. as if the sensation had never been there to begin with.
within seconds his darkened static vision dissipates, slamming his mind back into reality. he was laying on his side, he could feel every single blade of grass brush along his arms. along with it another thing brushed against his noticeably pale skin. the smooth tanned skin of his mothers little finger barely grazing the flesh of his exposed arm, just below the hem of his shirt.
izuku blinks, eyes unfocused and blurry, he tries to shake away the disoriented feeling that lay in place of his panic. what just happened? one minute he was being forcibly enclosed in a static box with a world too loud and sensations deprived and now it was gone. whipped clean with no real trace of having existed outside of a faint memory.
“mom?” izuku croaks, eyes slowly tracing his mothers fingers, frozen still right beside his arm. he cautiously scans the rest of her hand, noticing how her palm twitched slightly. his eyes drag along her arm, conscious of a dizziness that follows his slow movements.
he can feel his head rise, a stark contrast to before when he’d barely held his chin away from his chest. he felt light, too light even, as though he could float now if he tried.
izuku rises slowly, methodical, as though fearful his blinding numbness would return if he’d shift too suddenly. everything was too still. his trembling had ceased, as had his breathing which was now levelled out. held felt anew, rejuvenated in a way.
the phone call connected with a subtle beep. “hello?” i gentle voice speaks through the speaker.
izuku didn’t care to grab the phone. this was far too still. his mother was far too still. she didn’t move yet her eyes were open, blown wide with a permanent look of shock. she was so still it barely looked like she was breathing.
“hello? is anyone there?” the soft voice comes from the phone. once again, it was ignored.
bright eyes stare down dulled eyes. one told a story while the other simply watched. tanned cheeks were stained with tears. tears that do not move from their rightful place on izuku’s frozen mother.
her eyes, oh her brightly coloured eyes, stare at something beyond what izuku could see. they look into the soul of the boy and find something horrifying he couldn’t name. she was frozen. locked in a position of confusion and terror.
“hello? hello? hello?” the voice from the phone calls out, looking for a response that izuku knows is for him. he did this, he did this to his mother he’d frozen her in this state and they were calling out for him.
izuku hadn’t noticed he was crying again, hand reaching out for the phone. he kept his eyes glued to his mother, seeing the story she shared through her eyes despite her restrained form. he did this, she touched him and now she was stuck. restricted to only see whatever it was she could see that he could not.
“help.” izuku wheezes, not realising he’d been holding his breath. his voice was hoarse from his sobbing and sounded just as bad as it hurt. he ignored it when he heard the person on the other side respond.
“i can help, what’s wrong? can you tell what’s happened?” the person asks, voice gently but prying.
“i don’t know. i don’t know i did something. i didn’t mean to, i really didn’t mean to. she isn’t moving. i did something. help, help her.” izuku wails, beginning to fear the blank look his mother was situated with.
“hey sweetheart, i need you to breathe with me, okay? we have police and paramedics on the way but they will take a few minutes okay. you need to calm down.” the voice soothes gently. the person's voice was nice to hear, izuku concluded. the boy follows the woman's lead, trying to breath through the hiccups and sniffling he had gotten from his tears.
“there you go, keep breathing. just like that.” the voice praises as he pushes out long breaths.
“good, hey sweetheart, can you tell me your name please?” the voice asks.
“izuku, izuku midoriya.” the boy croaks, still sniffling heavily.
“hi there izuku, can you tell me now what happened?” the voice asks, sounding even sweeter than before.
“i don’t know. i felt really really heavy. it hurt and i tried to get my mom, but i couldn’t see anything. i couldn’t see and it hurt and i called for her! she came and called you and told me to lay down but now, now she isn’t moving and she is frozen and i did it and i don’t know what i did. i don’t know how to fix it!” izuku’s breathing begins to pick up again, guilt swallowing him whole with each second it took to glance at his mother. the voice is quick to calm him down.
“hey, izuku sweetie, it’s okay. it’s okay, people are on their way to help okay. can you answer another question for me sweetie?” the voice asks, and izuku can hear clicking from, most likely, a computer on the other side of the line. izuku hums out a simple yes, waiting for the voice to speak again.
“how old are you sweetheart?”
“i just turned four.” izuku answers with ease, mind immediately moving to the memories he had of this birthday party.
“ok, good, that means we might know why your mother is frozen. it might be your quirk.” the voice speaks quietly, as if the information was some kind of secret she shouldn’t be sharing.
“quirk? i don’t want this quirk though. i hurt mama and i don’t want to hurt her.” izuku can feel his lip quiver, eyes dragging back to his mothers curled up form.
she looked like she was in pain. vulnerable there in the openness of their front yard. izuku did that to her, because of a quirk. of a power everyone else seemed so happy to have. he wasn’t happy about it. why did this have to happen? why did it have to be him? and his mother.
she didn’t deserve whatever he’d done to her. he should be the one in pain, frozen to the green grass, not her. he was a monster. he was a villain for this, he had to be. she would hate him for trapping here wherever her mind seemed to be. god the fear frozen face leered into izuku, mocking him of all he’d done wrong. she didn’t deserve this.
more tears fall down swollen cheeks. tears he shouldn’t be shedding. he should not be crying. he did this, he did this to her.
“oh sweetie i understand, help is on the way okay, they should be there soon. has your mother moved at all?” the voice asks, instantly distracting the boy from his thoughts.
“no, no she isn’t moving. i’m sorry. i’m sorry mama.” izuku whispers, moving a little closer to his mother. he doesn’t touch her though. doesn’t dare to inch too close. “i’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry,” the boy babbles out repeatedly, ignoring the voice’s attempts at calming him down again. he couldn’t hear them. he didn’t want to hear them. the phone fell away from his hand. he wanted to hear his mother. he wanted to hear her sweet voice and feel her gentle warmth. he couldn’t touch her, he couldn’t hear her, it was his own fault. now both would be gone forever.
the sun was beginning to set. the warm glow and growing shadows delicately decorating abandoned toys along cool grass and pained bodies that will never be the same. the still body of a mother not totally there too help and the trembling figure of a boy too young to truly understand the shift he’s created in their world.
with each second that passed izuku’s trembling grew heavier. a familiar feeling beginning to settle onto his back as he watched his mother intently. he could hear the approaching screech of a siren, the sound vibrating around him in an echoey reminder of what he’d done.
he watched, partly ignoring the sirens, as his mothers hand twitched. as thought coming back from the trance she’d been trapped in her fingers twitched, reaching for him. izuku sobs, pushing himself away from his mother who was trembling like him, her eyes filled with sorrow. he did this to her, he hurt her.
izuku sobs harder when he sees his mother blink, sirens louder now and flashing lights reflecting off glassy eyes. with each of his mothers blinks his own seemed to stiffen, getting more and more difficult to clear his vision.
his tears weren’t blurring his vision. no the static was what was blurring the world. the weight from before, though lighter, settled around his body in a familiar numbness. his mother was moving, stiffly trying to sit up off the ground. there were other people too, rushing around him and his mother, helping to lift the women off the ground.
the world began to feel far out of reach. voices too loud to properly understand. izuku only cries, watching his stiff mother look around in a disoriented haze. she looked frightened, just as izuku had felt. he hurt her. he did this to her. izuku blinks away tears, wanting to see his mother just one more time before the static encloses him fully.
he never knew things would turn out this way. he wanted to play with his toys and eat his mothers amazing food. he wanted to dance and play like any other kid. he wanted to be a hero. he wanted to save people, not hurt them.
yet his quirk made him a villain.
no, not quirk. this was no power that would help, this was a power that hurt. it was a curse.
izuku was a curse.
that, that's what quirks truly were. curses tools made to harm. that’s all they were and all izuku ever believed them to be.
| ~ |
izuku hated doctors' offices.
it hadn’t been that way long. he’d only really come to the conclusion now, as his mother sat beside him in the waiting room. he had a quirk, a curse, and it needed to be examined is what the police had told him the night he’d hurt his mother. he didn’t like having a quirk.
he couldn’t see, which made things far more difficult, and while he could at least move now he could feel his limbs hang woodenly against his body.
the waiting room made him nauseous. he could smell nearly every chemical used to clean the place. it was loud, which he was grateful for, but he could hear his mother anxiously shift every few minutes beside him.
it was odd, even after everything he’d done she still kept near. izuku had expected the women to resent him, react how anyone would react to being attacked by a villain, yet here she was sitting closely beside him. she didn’t stop touching him, didn’t stop giving him hugs, since what happened. all she did was become more mindful of skin on skin contact.
it was odd.
“izuku midoriya.” said boy flinches at the voice, uncomfortable by the sudden loud noise.
“come on baby, let’s go.” his mother calls gently grabbing onto his cloth covered bicep to lead him around.
these rooms smelled even worse than the waiting room, izuku realised after they had been settled in a room. he’s sat on the examination bed, not entirely sure what and where he was looking. it was weird losing your vision when all you’d ever been used to was being able to see. the static he’d seen every day for the past few days was beginning to make him nauseous.
“izuku midoriya correct? my names yuui okubu i’m a specialist in understanding quirks, i’ll be work with you today so we can get a better grasp on your quirk and get your registration figured out.” izuku stiffened, not having heard the women enter and not entirely comfortable with the idea of his quirk.
it wasn’t a quirk, it was a curse.
“we don’t have to go into extreme detail with the registry, but enough to get a general idea that you can later update as you learn to use it.” doctor okubu explains softly, clearly talking to both midoriya’s with a smile izuku couldn’t see.
“so, little izuku, can you tell me anything about your quirk?” izuku doesn’t answer right away, trying to fight his urge to correct the doctor on whether he could call the power a quirk or a curse.
“um, i don’t know,” he says instead, keeping his voice low as to not hurt his own ears. “i can’t see because of it, i feel heavy and stiff. and i know something happens when i touch someone’s skin, but that’s it.” izuku adds, still being very quiet.
“ok, that’s a good start! i’ll make sure to keep note of that and we can do an evaluation on your eyes and movements soon. mrs midoriya? is there anything you can tell me about it? i was informed when izuku’s quirk manifested that you were both in a bit of an, incident? do you mind explaining to me what had happened to izuku and yourself?”
izuku internally cringed at the doctor's words, hating how she tried to toe around the subject while still stomping onto izuku's fragile heart.
“oh, um well from what i remember i had heard izuku crying, he was outside at the time, so i went to check and he was trembling like a leaf and saying he couldn’t see and complaining that his body’s as in pain. of course i panicked and began calling for help. i went to try and lay him on his side when i touched his arm and everything sort of melted away? the best way i can explain the experience would be like going through sleep paralysis. i couldn’t move, i could speak, i couldn’t hear anything, and i couldn’t see anything but static. almost like i was staring at a dark computer static screen.” inko recounts the experience with ease. the boy listened, neither had really said a word about the experience after the whole ordeal, izuku having been too sensitive to almost everything after.
“oh, and there were things, shadowy figures that stood around. it’s what made the whole thing feel like sleep paralysis.” inko adds, seeming a little more nervous to share the information.
“i see, sounds like an emitter quirk then, and roughly how long did this, sleep paralysis state last?” doctor okubu asks, her voice holds an interest that wasn’t there before.
“i’m not entirely sure of the exact time but i think i started coming to after roughly 10 minutes? i gauged how long i was out based on how long the call had gone on for while i was out.” inko explains easily, not even seeming shaken by the situation.
“hmm, alright, i’ll be sure to note the time limit, it will be good to know until izuku has control of the quirk.” doctor okubu mutters, the sound of a pen scratching paper very audible.
“now izuku, is what your mom has explained what you see and feel? or is it different?” doctor okubu turns attention back to the anxious boy.
“um, kind of? i guess what i see is static, i’m not sure, i don’t see shadows. and i just feel heavy like it’s hard to move. i felt almost tingly or numb?” izuku mumbles, not really liking the attention on him. how was not being able to see praying eyes even worse than seeing them.
“alright, what about after your mom touched you? did anything change?” izuku gulps, remembering how he’d felt watching his mothers statue-like form, seeing the horror frozen into her eyes.
“um, yes, it changed. when she touched me all of it went away. i didn’t feel heavy or numb, i could move. i could see.” izuku gulps, feeling his eyes water. he ducks his head, trying to keep his tears at bay and hidden from the adults in the room.
“ok, that makes sense. is that all you can add? if so we can get to work on your registration.” doctor okubu mentions, quickly moving the subject on.
“yeah, that should be it.” inko answered for izuku, motherly instinct having noticed how uncomfortable izuku had become at the topic.
“alright, we will get started then. let’s start off with this, would you like to name the quirk or just put down a vague explanation of what it is exactly?”
the room falls silent, neither midoriya’s really wanting to name the quirk. after what felt like too long of a pause, inko finally speaks up for the two of them.
“call it static paralysis, it’s simple enough.”
“alright that works.”
doctor okubu turns, clicking away at her keyboard loudly. writing the name of the curse izuku had learned to hate.
’Static Paralysis.’