Work Text:
“ricky, ricky ! quanrui come here right now !”
at the sound of his chinese name, ricky stops in his motion, slowly turning around. he gulps and tries his best to not sob immediately. there’s a certain way in which ricky reacts when he hears his name, but even more when it’s hao pronouncing it.
“quanrui. care to explain what’s happening right now ?” he stomps in the kitchen, arms crossed. “taerae just called me, and he told me he saw you outside, last night, in the parking lot next to the playground. what were you doing there ?”
hearing hao being angry is not the worst thing ever. no. hearing hao being disappointed is way worse. and ricky knows better than to disappoint him. his face must give it all away, because hao softens and grabs him into his arms.
“oh… darling, don’t be sad, i didn’t mean to scare you. i just want you to be safe.” he explains, hugging ricky tightly. “do you want to tell me about it ?”
ricky nods, suddenly feeling way too down to lie.
“i met up with a friend. i’m sorry… i should have told you about it before.”
“it’s ok darling, i understand. you’re in a period of your life where you need to find your friends, i was the same at your age. but next time, ask me if you want to meet up with them. ok ? now tell me, who was it ?”
ricky goes red immediately, hiding his face in his palms. there’s a lot that goes in the mind of a fifteen year old who also happens to suddenly develop a crush on his friend. and telling his parents about it is probably the worst situation he found himself in.
“do i really have to ?”
“well, if you want me to help you, you have to. and if you don’t, i won’t get to drive you to their house. the ball’s on your side.” hao smiles, looking sheepishly at his son.
“gyuvin. i went to the playground with gyuvin because he asked me to spend some time with him.”
hao’s face shows a hundred emotions at the same time when he takes into consideration the fact his oldest son is escaping the family house to hang out with his best friend. if he knew about it, he would have helped him.
“gyuvin, as in… matthew’s son ?”
“yeah. gyuvin from my class as well. this is embarrassing…”
“owww, it’s not ! it’s important to have first experiences with people you are close to. and i’m really happy it’s gyuvin, he’s an angel. and matthew is going to be so happy about you two. i sooo need to tell him !”
in a silent cry, ricky gets out of the embrace, cheeks completely burning.
“mom !” he says immediately, not without regretting it. ricky never calls hao his mother, because he finds it cringe. but at that moment, it comes out without thinking. “stop that ! nothing is happening between us, no need for those first experiences.”
“oh i know that talk, my dear. that’s what i was saying about hanbin before we got together… but once again, you’re only fifteen, you have all your life ahead of you to discover your feelings.”
ricky sighs, as the door opens in the living room. they both turn their heads at the same time. there are two different reactions. hao’s eyes soften immediately, full of love and fondness. while ricky’s opens widely in happiness. hanbin is here, at the threshold, with their second son next to him, eating a popsicle.
“did we interrupt something ?” he asks, as he welcomes hao in his arms.
“not at all, we were simply talking about ricky’s high school. they sent us a few documents to sign for his entry in his option. i need you to do it as well.”
hanbin nods and reaches to put his lips on hao’s. ricky rolls his eyes dramatically, avoiding the view in front of him. instead, he takes his brother’s hand in his own, and guides him to the sofa. it doesn’t take long until he turns the tv on, and plays the cartoons. there is always a way to keep his brother busy. especially since the twelve year old is obsessed with those japanese shows lately.
“how was yujinnie’s practice ?”
“he did very well, the teachers are proud of him. you should come see him next time.” hanbin answers, before putting the lost strands of hair behind hao’s ears. he shudders and blushes immediately, hiding his face in hanbin’s chest.
there’s no way ricky and yujin can escape their stupid little public display of affection. because it has always been this way in the sung household. there are the parents, hanbin and hao, most stupid people in the world - if you ask ricky - who also happen to be the one he loves the most in the world. and there are their two sons, ricky and yujin.
stupid ? why ? you may ask. well. hao and hanbin met randomly in college. hao - previously zhang hao - was one of the most well known person in town, always grading at the top of his class and being the student council president. hanbin was the dance club leader, and eventually ended up meeting hao from time to time, in the hallways. fate brought them together when hanbin slipped during a dance competition, and fell in front of hao. they both spent the next week together, healing and curing their wounds.
and ricky finds them terribly stupid for : 1, not realizing sooner that they were probably made for each other and 2, having their first child when they were still in college. he’s grateful though, because if they didn’t, then, he wouldn’t have existed. but honestly… so young ? fortunately, that didn’t stop neither of them from pursuing their studies, and they both ended up graduating, getting their diploma, and finding a job.
it didn’t help that matthew, hanbin’s best friend, also presented the same problem with another one of their friends, an upperclassman. ricky finds them all really dumb. but thanks to that, he can now hang out with kim gyuvin, his best friend, who happens to matthew and jiwoong’s son.
and just as if one child didn’t satisfy them, they decided to go for another one. so meet sung yujin, ricky’s younger brother, who’s the cutest child on earth, whom everyone wants to put in their pocket. and it would be a lie to say ricky isn’t protective of his brother. the only person he lets come closer to yujin has to be gyuvin, who begs him to let him see yujin.
“i’ll do my best. the school’s schedule is terrible this year, i have to be there early in the morning, and i will only come back late in the night. i’m so sorry…”
“no need to be, you can’t do anything about it, can you ?” hanbin reassures him. “i will film him next time, don’t worry. your son is doing amazing for his age.”
“ my son ? i didn’t make him by myself.”
“lord ! i didn’t agree to hear you two talk about that in the middle of the living room !” ricky exclaims, covering yujin’s ears at the same time. “i understand but please do that in your room…”
hao and hanbin look at each other before bursting into laughter.
“alright, sorry. didn’t mean to shock our now fifteen year old perfect son. but you’ll understand once you meet the right one.” hanbin says, patting ricky’s hair as he does. those blond strands are always a miracle for them, considering the whole family is black haired.
“oh about that ! did you know that our ricky found-”
“mom !”
they all brush it off, and dinner’s slowly being cooked, with, as always, hao touching the furnace, and hanbin, touching everything but the furnace. more often than not, his hands find their way on hao’s waist, before being slapped away with a complaint. ricky thinks they’re pretty dumb, however, he can’t help but be jealous of the bond they share.
he wishes he would experience that too, some day.
—
“i don’t know matthew… it’s just so sudden and unpredictable. what if he’s not ok with it ?”
seated at the terrasse of the popular café in town, hao is sipping on his lemonade, rubbing his temples at the same time. matthew and taerae are both seated in front of him, also enjoying their drinks. it’s a peaceful afternoon of may, on a sunday. none of them are at work, and most importantly, none of them are at home. they left the children with the other parent, for some afternoon peace.
“what would he not ? he loves you, he loves taking care of you, and most importantly, he has no good reason to say no.”
“i agree. hanbin would love that.” taerae nods. “you’re both financially stable and ready to welcome a new person into this house. i’m sure ricky and yujin will be happy as well.”
hao sighs again, hitting his head on the wooden table.
“i don’t know why it happened.”
“you never heard about baby fever ?” matthew jokes.
“of course i have ! you’re treating me like some child now. i know it happens to some people, but i didn’t know it could happen to me .”
“well, there’s a first to everything.” taerae shrugs. “and besides, i don’t know why you’re so stressed about it. you’re still fairly young, and your body won’t react too badly. you have actually every reason to go for a third.”
another long inhale later, hao finds himself almost sobbing out of nervousness.
“easy to say, you both only have one child each. i already have two, and they’re teenagers now. what would people think of me if i suddenly had another one ? ricky will be sixteen !”
“nothing much. it’s pretty common in fact. there’s no age to be happy and to start a family. or in your case, extend. i promise you, you’re overreacting and anxious for nothing. hanbin loves you, ricky and yujin love you. everyone loves you.”
hao woke up that day feeling… weird. not in a bad way, but more in a ‘there’s something inside me, and i don’t know what it is but i don’t like it’ way. hanbin was still very much sleeping next to him, and hao had to fight back the urge to snuggle closer, because he knew that would wake him up. so instead, he left the bed, and went to check on his sons.
ricky was asleep, almost dead, while yujin was moving in his sleep, muttering words no one could understand. no one, except sung hao, of course. he lowered his head, just for his ear to be close to yujin’s mouth. 妈妈. that’s what yujin was saying. he was calling for someone, for a presence in his life and for a warmness to envelop him.
hao didn’t think twice at that moment, and immediately took his son in his arms. yujin began sobbing uncontrollably, before finally waking up. if usually, he would try to get out of the embrace, embarrassed, today, he didn’t do anything. he simply breathed against hao’s skin, until he was finally composed.
‘what happened ? another nightmare ?’ hao asked in the lightest and sweetest tone he could use.
‘i had a dream that-’ yujin hiccuped. ‘that i wasn’t good enough, and the dance teacher told me i was bringing everyone down. he told me i wasn’t a good dancer, and i needed to give up on my dream.’
hao shut his eyes close, and tenderly doted on his son, reassuring him the best he could. he still didn’t want to wake hanbin or ricky up, considering it was a dark night outside, and most probably around two or three am at that time.
‘it was all a bad dream yujinnie. you’re an amazing dancer, and i want you to know that everyone is proud of you. we all love you, no matter what. so don’t listen to what the man in your dream says.’
it took another five minutes for yujin to be entirely calm. hao took the responsibility to wash his face, cleaning the snot and drool. when he was finally done, yujin asked to sleep with him for the rest of the night. hao took him to the parental bedroom, and settled him between hanbin and himself. they drifted away together.
but before falling asleep, something came into his mind. when he saw yujin snuggled against hanbin’s arms, he had an epiphany. this thing in his guts, in his stomach, twirling and turning around. it’s not some illness. it’s a want, a need.
i need a new child to take care of. and i need it now.
hao fell asleep on that.
when he woke up later, in the morning, hanbin was playing with yujin’s hair, making sure his son was sleeping soundly. hao took a few seconds to observe the scene playing in front of his eyes, and then he smiled.
he will be an amazing father, once again.
but without the dazed haze of the morning, and the peculiar effect of the night on his brain, hao realizes that the sudden plan of having a new child is somehow uncalled for. that’s why he’s seated in front of matthew and taerae, trying to get them on whichever side he is on at that moment.
“what will he say ? lord, i can’t just go to him and say ‘hey, let’s make another one because i suddenly have a baby fever and i crave to be a mother once again’. it doesn’t work this way !”
matthew looks around, gathering his thoughts.
“you know, there’s a saying in french. it says ‘jamais deux sans trois’ . which means, never two without three. if you do something twice, you’re bound to do it thrice.”
“ok and ?”
“you already have two kids, might as well go for three, just saying. come on, everyone knows that yujin is dying to have a sibling, and maybe this time, you’ll be able to have a girl as well !”
hao bites the inside of his cheek, clearly thinking about it, but also widely disturbed.
“so you think it would be a good idea ?” he asks.
“of course it would. imagine with ricky, gyuvin, gunwook and yujin protecting them. i’m sure they would all love them. you really don’t have to worry.” taerae takes his hand, rubbing the smooth skin. “we’d be here to help you as well.”
“ah taerae, if it wasn’t for junhyeon, i would have been the one to marry you.”
the discussion dies here, as they part ways. when hao comes back home in the afternoon, yujin, ricky and hanbin are sleeping on the couch, snoring quietly. hanbin has an arm spread over both of his sons, in a protective way. hao coos, almost purrs unconsciously at the sight.
he immediately goes to the kitchen, and makes them all three some hot chocolate, and plays classical music on the shared speaker, just loud enough to be heard faintly. matthew’s words are still ringing in his mind.
jamais deux sans trois .
never two without three.
and why not ? after all ? they have the money they need, their apartment is fully paid, they paid for the car as well, are old enough to navigate through their life, and have already experienced parenthood twice. besides… hao remembers vividly something his medic told him after yujin was born.
‘this is absolutely amazing, mister sung, you already have two perfectly healthy sons, but your body is as new as someone without children. you could have six or seven children and it wouldn’t bulge. you’re truly blessed.”
if his body is healthy and ready for another one, then who is he to deny it ?
when he’s done, he kisses yujin on the cheek, ricky on the forehead, and hanbin on the lips. the three of them wake up, groaning. yujin reaches out, extending his arms, and hao gives in. he picks up his son, and pats his head.
“slept well sweetie ?”
“hmm…” he receives as an answer, while yujin slowly opens his eyes.
“what did you do with your dad today while i was away ?”
“dad brought us to the skating rink. ricky was very good, and dad… dad slipped a lot on ice, he wasn’t very good… next time, you should come with us, mom.”
there’s this sense of pride when yujin calls him his mother, because hao is his mother, in a way. he brought him to life, doted on him for years, and definitely acts like a mom to him. yujin is his son, and will always be.
“i will, i will. mom will come next time.”
yujin hums, coming closer, and hiding in the crook of his neck. the feeling of having his son so close is delirious, fantastic, and hao wants it again. he wants to have a child again. he is ready, his body is ready, his friends are supportive. now, he needs to talk about it to hanbin.
which is the hardest part.
once he wakes up, he immediately drinks his hot chocolate, and then kisses hao. the taste of chocolate merges in between their lips.
“it’s pretty sweet, did you add sugar this time ?”
“i thought you needed a little extra today. you’ve been taking good care of them when i was away, so maybe you deserve it.” hao replies, smiling against his lips.
“hmm.. maybe i do.”
“I’m right here.” ricky coughs in his fist, clearly uneasy because of his parents acting all lovey dovey while he’s only a meter away. they apologize immediately, and go back to their respective tasks, just like everyday.
it’s only when nighttime arrives that hao gathers his courage, and asks hanbin for a private talk. when their children are finally asleep, he takes his hand, and makes him sit on the bed.
“wow, is something happening ?”
“love, i need to talk to you.” hao breathes in steadily, already quite shaking. “please, listen to me.”
“of course i will, did i do something wrong ?”
hao fidgets with the hem of his - hanbin’s - sweatshirt, clearly anxious. he doesn’t know how to handle the discussion, and the fact hanbin is so calm and composed makes him rethink everything. maybe he should talk about it later. or maybe never.
“oh hao… why are you so nervous ? you’re not about to ask for a divorce, right ?”
“what ?! of course not, i would never !” he says quickly, cheeks red. “no… love, please it’s serious. i’ve been thinking about something all day and i think it’s time to tell you about it.”
“i’m listening.”
“i-” hao starts, but he struggles finding the right words. ”you know how much i love ricky and yujin, right ?”
hanbin raises a brow, confused, but answers nonetheless.
“of course i do.”
“i… i feel like i need to live through young motherhood once again. ricky will turn sixteen and yujin thirteen, and i miss having a young child…”
“do you mean..?”
“love. hanbin. sung hanbin. my dear husband. let’s have another child.”
there’s a moment of silence between the two of them, and hao wonders if he did something wrong. because there is no way hanbin would react so badly. even if he wasn’t all for the idea, surely, he wouldn’t give hao the silent treatment.
anxious and now mortified at the idea of his husband not wanting that additional child, hao starts moving, tears forming in his eyes. that is until a hand finds its way to his wrist, and pins him down to the bed. and oh, there’s hanbin. and he wears the biggest smile on his lips.
his eyes are shining, almost close to crying. but he looks so happy, so overjoyed, that hao might think he’s not actually crying out of sadness.
“sung hao, you’re not kidding me ?”
“no big baby, i’m not ! do you think i would joke about that ? i literally had an existential crisis and i had to call matthew and taerae for advice.'' he babbles, feeling his cheeks burning up under hanbin’s hot gaze.
“so while i was here taking care of our sons, you were asking our friends for advice about our love life… hao, you could have just told me, you know.”
“i wasn’t sure if you wanted it as well. come on, i had every reason to be insecure.”
hanbin looks at him with those handsome eyes, piercing and burning. hao feels himself being undressed just under hanbin’s gaze.
“i would be one crazy fucker to not want another child with you. actually, i think i saved the world in my past life to deserve you. god… hao, i would give you one, or two, or three, or how many you want. just tell me and i’ll comply.”
“one is good enough for now. i don’t think i can handle three other mini you in this house.” hao replies, avoiding eye contact.
“if you’re in then… what about we start ?”
hao goes deep red at the thought.
“hanbin ! ricky and yujin are in the room next to us. they could hear us !”
“you’ll have to keep it down, then. but i’m sure that’s something you can do, right ? you've been doing it pretty well the past few years.”
there’s this laugh that resonates, but hao is so lost in those eyes that he doesn’t even notice it. according to plan, he tells himself. it all went according to plan. except for the part where hanbin goes feral and absolutely takes over for the night.
but that’s a concern for tomorrow.
—
“ricky, yujin. we have something to tell you.” hao starts, while hanbin’s hand is resting on his shoulder, rubbing with his thumb in a circular motion.
“did you break the switch ?”
“oh no, i wanted to play the new zelda game…” yujin pouts at his brother’s words.
“no, completely unrelated. just… listen, ok ?”
both of their sons sit properly on the sofa, as hao takes a deep breath. he offered to tell the children about it, but now that he’s about to face them, he feels the shivers coming back.
he has to inform them though, he can’t chicken out right now, when he’s about to announce the biggest news of their life.
“hanbin and i… we decided to expand the family. together.”
“we’re finally getting a cat ?!” yujin asks while getting up, overexcited.
“no. sorry yujinnie. it’s… something else.”
ricky’s eyes slightly open wider. oh. he definitely understands now. hanbin sees it in the way he exhales deeply while nodding his head. there’s no way a fifteen year old wouldn’t get it.
“you’re going to have another sibling.”
deep silence in the room.
“lord… i can’t believe we’re having this talk right now.” ricky mutters, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
“we have to have this talk ! we don’t want our children to repeat the same mistakes we made in the past. do you hear me quanrui ? no children before you’re at least twenty five. ”
“you’re telling me that as if you didn’t have both of us before twenty five, matthew as well and taerae as well !”
“that’s why you shouldn’t do the same thing.”
yujin stands between them all, eyes wide open in disbelief. a sibling. a younger sibling. which means he will be an older brother. he beams at the promise.
“it’s a girl or a boy ?”
“we don’t know yet. probably in two months. you’re already excited about it, yujinnie ?” hanbin says, a hint of a smirk on his lips.
“of course ! i’ll get to be an older brother ! i won’t be the youngest anymore !”
hao smiles and looks down, at his own stomach. it’s still flat for now. but he knows in a few weeks, days even, the bump will appear. and then, everything will become a reality. twelve years after his last child, he’s finally able to experience this happiness again.
hanbin leaves a small kiss on his nape, which makes hao shiver. this time, he needs to thank matthew, because without him, nothing would have turned out so well.
jamais deux sans trois.
for sure, they’re excited to welcome the new presence in their home. because they know deep inside, everyone is ready to accept them. and hao can’t even explain how happy he is to see his family growing.
a smile forms on his lips.
—
eight months later, on a cold night of february, sung wonhee is born. she’s a healthy girl with a bright smile, and squishy cheeks yujin can’t stop touching. ricky is rather discreet, but the way his eyes twinkle gives it away.
taerae, junhyeon and gunwook visit the first day. they’re all very happy to meet the new addition to the sung family. junhyeon, especially, keeps bugging taerae about having another child too.
and if he doesn’t say yes, there’s still a hint of some possibility behind his words.
on the second day, matthew, jiwoong and gyuvin pass by. even if gyuvin spends most of his time stuck to ricky’s side. matthew doesn’t forget to congratulate the couple and give them flowers. hao is still in a haze after everything he’s been through, but they manage.
it’s only when yujin and ricky agree on spending the next night and day at matthew’s that the parents finally get some time for themselves. wonhee is sleeping on hao’s chest, and the smile on his lips is so precious that hanbin wonders what he did to deserve such a life.
“you’re staring.”
“i’m admiring the view, you can’t blame me.” hanbin smiles. “i’m just… so happy to have you, and the kids. so so happy.”
“stop being a sap and kiss me, sung hanbin.”
and for sure, he’s glad to comply, reaching down to peck hao’s lips. the contact is sweet and addictive, but they know better than to get carried on right now. so instead, they part away, the same fond smile mirroring on their face.
“this is the last time i go through this, though. i can’t handle another one.”
“you said that when yujin was born, but looking back, you weren’t against it when you suddenly had your baby fever.” hanbin replies, enjoying the way hao’s face turns into a pout.
“you’re mean.”
hanbin reaches to kiss him once again, and suddenly, everything is forgiven. hao thinks about matthew’s words. he would rephrase it.
jamais deux sans trois, mais trois c’est suffisant.
never two without three, but three is enough.
even though with sung hanbin as his husband, he’s not sure he won’t go through another baby fever at some point. it’s not his fault his husband looks so good with children anyway !
just thinking about it makes hao giddy all over again. they will have to make the walls soundproof next time. he doesn’t want to disturb their little princess now. even more since hanbin isn’t really fond of keeping it low. for now, it’s not like they have a choice. maybe in a year or two, hao will want to experience this again.
but that’s a thought for another day. as of now, in this present moment, he thinks about his two sons, ricky and yujin. his daughter, wonhee. and his husband, sung hanbin.
and he tells himself he could have never founded a better family.