Chapter Text
"If I told you what I was
Would you turn your back on me?
And if I seem dangerous
Would you be scared?"
—---—
Ever since Keith was young, he’d always felt a little bit different. Whether it was obscure feelings of rage, or being able to see strangely well in the dark, there was always some part of him, a whisper, one could say, that felt he was different from everyone else.
When he was fifteen, he thought he had figured out why.
Boys aren’t supposed to like other boys, that’s what he had always been told. So that was why he was so different, so weird compared to other kids.
He was gay.
And that wasn’t normal.
Allegedly.
Until he had brought it up with Takashi Shirogane, his mentor and/or brother figure.
Shiro had laughed and said, “If liking boys is weird, then we can be outcasts together.”
That was the first time an adult had ever made him feel so safe, so understood. It was amazing. Keith had smiled for the first time in years.
But now, Keith wasn’t safe. And he wasn’t understood. He was an outcast once again. And all because he was a Galra. All because his eyes were starting to look like a cat’s. Purple outlined by pale yellow. His irises slanted and narrow. His teeth were changing, too. They were like fangs now. He had split his lip on them multiple times since they started becoming sharper.
When he had awakened his blade, the blade awakened something inside of him, too. His Galra genes were becoming more prominent.
And now, all of his friends were scared of him. Pidge wouldn’t talk to him. Hunk started breathing erratically and panicking whenever Keith walked past. Shiro looked disappointed in him. Allura was downright hostile. Coran looked sad. And Lance…
Well, if Lance hadn’t hated Keith before, he certainly did now.
And wasn’t that just the icing on the fucking cake?
Lance, the boy who promised to never turn his back on Keith, was now treating him like an animal.
And the worst part was that Keith was hopelessly in love with him. Like, head-over-heels in love with. White girl in a romcom in love with him.
And Lance clearly didn’t feel the same way.
(obviously)
—---—
Keith was sharpening his knife in his room when someone knocked on the door.
“Come in.” He said, not taking his eyes off the knife.
The door opened, revealing Allura, who was looking downright murderous.
Keith looked up at her, confused as to why she was already pissed. He hadn’t even done anything yet.
“Can I help you, princess?”
She snorts, rolling her eyes.
“First of all, you can put down that blade, you filthy Galra.”
Keith’s eyes widened slightly. Allura had been rude to him before, but never like this. He put the knife down on the table next to him.
“And secondly, you can pack your bags, you’re leaving.”
“What?”
“Yes, you are leaving. I have contacted the Blades of Marmora. They are coming to collect you shortly. You have a little under two vargas.”
“Why am I leaving?”
“I will not have the red lion be piloted by a disgusting Galra such as yourself.”
“But-”
“Do not question me. I am doing you a favor by keeping you alive. You will pack your bags and go, am I understood?”
“Yes, Allura.”
“Do not refer to me by name, we are not friends, we are not even allies. You are Galra scum. Now pack.”
Keith resorts to just a nod of confirmation.
Allura gracefully turns around and leaves the room. Keith sighs in defeat. That was it, then. His team, the only family he’s known since his dad died, are abandoning him. Just like his mom. Maybe the problem was him all along.
Of course it was. After all, he was the common denominator. Nothing but a monster.
—---—
About a varga later, Keith was standing in front of a Blades ship. His teammates, or ex-teammates now, surrounded him. Probably trying to make sure he doesn’t run away. As if he has anywhere to go.
Dejected, Keith turns around one last time, looking at the people he had learned to call family. They weren’t much of a family anymore.
Pidge, Lance, and Allura all glared at him.
Shiro, Hunk, and Coran all looked sad.
Coran stepped forward and held out his hand. Keith took it and shook.
“Goodbye, number 4.”
Keith just nodded, not trusting his words.
It was time to go.
—---—
"I'm only a man with a candle to guide me
I'm taking a stand to escape what's inside me
A monster, a monster
I've turned into a monster
A monster, a monster
And it keeps getting stronger"
—---—
One Deca-phoeb later, Keith is an official member of the Blades of Marmora. It’s great. He’s finally found his mom, and he now has a space wolf named Kosmo. He has a family in the Blades, he’s accepted for who he is.
It’s all he’s ever wanted.
But late at night, he thinks of his old family, the Paladins of Voltron. He hasn’t heard anything about them for eight pheobs. He’s not even sure if they’re still alive.
What would they think if they saw him now, looking fully Galra with his purple cat ears and tail? Would they even recognize him? Probably not. He doesn’t even go by Keith anymore. He decided that being a human was something he wanted to forget. He didn’t want anything to tie him to his past. Not even his name.
He is Yorak now, courtesy of Krolia.
He thought it was best to let his mom choose his name, since he wanted it to be something Galra.
He’s more in touch with his Galra side now. Yorak barely even remembers what it was like to be human. To not have a tail. To have human eyes.
He’s grown now. At least four inches. He went from a scrawny 5’ 10” human to a muscular 6’ 2” Galra. Granted, he’s still short compared to the rest of the Blades, but he is very tall compared to what he used to be.
Yorak also has a massive scar on his cheek now. That wasn’t fun to get.
None of it was.
—---—
The Blades are having a meeting when Krolia breaks the news.
“We’re meeting with the Paladins of Voltron in a Quintant.”
Yorak chokes on his own spit.
“Tomorrow?”
“Yes, Yorak. We have an alliance with them and it is time to have our annual meeting with them to discuss our alliance.”
“But…”
“I know you don’t like the Paladins, Yorak, and frankly, I don’t either, not after what they did to you, but we do need to talk with them.”
“Do I have to talk with them?”
“No. You can simply observe.”
“...Fine.”
Krolia nods and goes back to discussing strategy. But Yorak can’t focus. How can he, when the Paladins, the people who shunned him and threw him away are coming here tomorrow?
All he can do is hope they don’t recognize him.
—---—
Lance is ecstatic. It’s been forever since he’s gone to one of these meetings. It’s been getting boring on the castle-ship, and they haven’t been able to form Voltron since Keith left. The red lion refuses to even turn on without its rightful Paladin.
Keith.
Lance hasn’t told anyone this, but whenever they go on a planet, Lance sneaks off to try and find Keith. He’s not even really sure why. Maybe he just feels bad.
As he should.
Lance can’t help but wish that he had stood up for Keith. That he had said something, anything that could’ve changed Keith’s fate.
But Lance hadn’t even said goodbye.
Now he was getting sad, but he couldn’t because they were on their way to the annual meeting with the Blades. He wondered if Keith was there.
But he knew that he wasn’t.
He had asked a random Blade member a while ago.
‘Do you know if there is a Blade named Keith?’ He had asked.
The Blade member had shaken his head.
‘I’ve met every Blade member who is currently alive. There is none named Keith.’
Lance figured that the safe thing to do was to assume Keith was dead.
—---—
After a while of traveling, the Paladins had finally arrived at the Blades headquarters. They stepped out of the black lion that Shiro had driven. All of them had been uncomfortably squished in the lion together.
They were greeted by a grumpy looking Blade member who was at least two feet taller than Pidge. The Blade member nodded at them and put out her hand for Shiro to shake.
“I am Krolia, one of the leaders of this institution. And you are…?”
Allura stepped in front of Shiro and shook Krolia’s hand.
“I am Allura, princess of Altea. You know Altea, the planet that your people destroyed?” She said smugly.
Krolia narrowed her eyes.
“Anyway, these are the Paladins of Voltron, Shiro, Hunk, Pidge, and Lance.”
Krolia’s eyes flicked over to Lance and she huffed.
“Where is your fifth Paladin?”
Allura rolled her eyes.
“Hopefully dead. We disposed of him a deca-phoeb ago.”
Lance wanted to punch her in the face. Based on Krolia’s face, so did she.
Krolia leaned closer to Allura, her voice quiet.
“Let me tell you something, princess. You are in my land now, you have no power here, and if I hear you talking bad about my kind one more time, I will not be so gracious as to let you leave safely. Am I understood?”
Allura gave one stiff nod and Lance grinned. He liked Krolia already.
—---—
Krolia led them through the hallways of the Blades headquarters. Allura had her fists clenched and was glaring at the back of Krolia’s head the whole time. Hunk looked nervous and Pidge was staring at their little pet puffball, avoiding eye contact with any of the passing Galra. Shiro kept glancing around, as if looking for something.
Lance was doing the same thing. There had to be some evidence of Keith here.
Krolia turned a corner and stopped suddenly. She turned around and faced the Paladins.
“Paladins of Voltron, I would like to introduce you to my right-hand man and son, Yorak.”
She grabbed a Galra who was passing by and pulled him in front of her. The Galra stumbled slightly and then stood up and looked at the Paladins.
Lance gasped when he saw his face.
“Keith?”
—---—
"Can I clear my conscience
If I'm different from the rest
Do I have to run and hide? (Oh, oh, oh, oh)
I never said that I want this
This burden came to me
And it's made its home inside (oh, oh, oh, oh)"
—---—
Krolia looked startled.
“Keith? Who is Keith?”
Lance was confused. This Galra, it looked a lot like Keith. Even the mullet was similar.
“No one. Nevermind.”
Shiro looked over at Lance and raised his eyebrow. Lance felt self-conscious under the scrutiny of Krolia’s son’s gaze.
“Anyway, as I was saying, this is my son, Yorak.”
“Hello.” Shiro said.
Yorak nodded slowly.
“Right, I’m Yorak,” He said, looking grumpy as hell. “I have to go. I will see you at the meeting, Krolia.”
Yorak briskly walked away, and Hunk whimpered slightly when Yorak walked past him.
Even Yorak’s voice sounded like Keith’s, all down to the slight Southern hint that Keith’s voice used to carry.
Lance must be imagining things. There’s no way that Galra was Keith… Keith was a Galra, but not that much of a Galra. Obviously.
—---—
Eventually, Krolia led the Paladins to a hallway.
“These will be your sleeping chambers for the next movement. If you need anything, Yorak’s room is right there,” She pointed at a door a little ways down the hall. “Please try not to destroy anything. The meeting is tomorrow. Sleep well, Paladins.”
And with that, she walked away.
Pidge yawned and rubbed their eyes. “I’ll room with Hunk.” They said, and Hunk followed them into one of the three rooms.
Allura sniffed. “I shall room alone.” And with that, she disappeared into one of the rooms.
Shiro looked down at Lance. “Guess we’re rooming together, huh?” Lance nodded and opened the last door. The inside was nice, a bunk bed, a closet, a desk, and a bathroom. Lance climbed up on the top bunk.
“Hey, Lance, why did you call that Galra ‘Keith’?”
Lance looked down at Shiro from his perch.
He sighed. “I don’t know, I thought they looked like him,”
Lance looked away from Shiro and crossed his arms. “Do you even miss him, Shiro?”
“Of course I miss him. I miss him everyday. He was my brother.”
“Then why did we make him leave? He wasn’t hurting anyone!”
Shiro sighed.
“It’s complicated, Lance.”
“Don’t ‘it’s complicated’ me! Why did we make him leave?”
“Because we didn’t know what was going to happen! Would he turn evil? Would the Galra genes kill him? Would he betray us? I don’t know Lance, but I couldn’t watch him suffer! We did him a favor by letting him learn from his own kind!”
“He would have never betrayed us! You said it yourself, Shiro, he was your brother! He was our family! And we threw him away like he was nothing! He can’t control his ancestry! He didn’t do anything! It was just Allura being a brat!”
“Why are you using past tense, Lance?” Shiro asked quietly. “Why are you using past tense for Keith?”
“Because he’s dead, Shiro, most likely.”
“What makes you say that?”
“I asked a Blade member a while ago if there was a Blade member named Keith. He said he had met all the Blade members, and there was none named Keith. He’s not here anymore.”
Shiro was quiet for a few ticks before he quietly said, “I’m going to bed.”
Lance nodded.
“I’m going to go find the training room. I’m too wired to sleep.”
Shiro grunted in confirmation as Lance left the room.
—---—
"Ever since I could remember
Everything inside of me
Just wanted to fit in (oh, oh, oh, oh)
I was never one for pretenders
Everything I tried to be
Just wouldn't settle in (oh, oh, oh, oh)"
—---—
Lance was wandering the hallways when he eventually stumbled across Krolia leaving a room.
“Blue Paladin. What can I help you with?”
“I was wondering where the training room is?”
Krolia laughed.
“Training this late? You remind me of my son. He will probably be there, by the way. Best not to disturb him once you get there. He is quite temperamental.”
She paused and then pointed to the right.
“It’s that way, end of the hall, then turn left. Have fun, Blue Paladin. And try to avoid getting stabbed.”
“By the bots?”
“By Yorak.”
—---—
When Lance finally found the training room, he stepped inside and was greeted by the sight of Yorak dismembering some training bots.
“Hey, man.”
Yorak whirled around and pressed his sword to Lance’s neck.
Lance put his hands up.
“Woah, dude. I come in peace. Please don’t kill me.”
Yorak huffed and put his sword down. He then walked over to one of the benches and sat down to sharpen his sword.
Against his better judgement, Lance sat down next to him.
“So, like, what’s your deal? Are you new here? How come I’ve never seen you before?”
Yorak glared at him.
“I’ve been a Blade member for a deca-phoeb. And you’ve probably never seen me before because I don’t like the Paladins of Voltron.”
“You don’t like us? We’ve never even done anything to you!”
Yorak snorts.
“Right.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means that isn’t true. Your princess has done a number on us.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that she’s killed Blade members for being Galra.”
“Seriously?”
Lance couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“Yes. I’ve met a few whose livelihoods have been ruined by your precious princess.”
“Did you perhaps meet someone named Keith Kogane?”
Yorak sits up straighter and inhales. He also stops sharpening his blade.
“Yes.”
“Seriously? Is he okay? Where is he?”
“He is… dead.”
Lance felt like all the air had been punched out of him.
“Really?”
“Yes. He’s been dead for phoebs.”
“Oh.”
“And even if he was alive, I highly doubt he’d want to see you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?
“Figure it out, ‘Sharpshooter.’”
“‘Sharpshooter?’” Lance squeaked.
“Yes, that’s what he called you, is it not?”
“Yeah, but how…?”
“I know a lot about you, Blue Paladin.”
“Like what?”
Yorak stands up and starts to leave. Right before he vanishes out of the doorway, he stops and says, “I know that Keith was in love with you.”
And with that, he leaves.
And Lance is broken.