Work Text:
It takes Welt months to rebuild his body.
He had known how the war ended; known that the Void Queen was neutralized and that the Abyss Flower had done much to mitigate the causalities of the war. Welt tells himself that he did all he could, and hopes one day that he can believe it.
Though, he can tell something is amiss. His body and mind may still be getting used to having shape again, but Tesla and Einstein are quieter around him, gentle, even. Even if he could hardly walk they would never treat him like he was fragile; they had been proponents of tough love since he was a child.
Maybe he should contact you and see what was going on... Einstein and Tesla were always more open with you, anyways.
Still relearning his steps, Welt limps out of his room and into the main atrium. Einstein speaks on her comm to Amber, while Tesla types behind her hologram's screen.
"You--?! What are you doing out of the infirmary?" Tesla huffs, quickly wiping her eyes on her sleeves. Einstein turns to face Welt, then hangs up her comm quickly.
"Relax, I'm fine." Despite his words, he finds himself gripping the side of a desk to keep himself upright. "Just wanted to check in with a special someone. It's been too long since I've heard from them, I want to make sure all is well where they are."
Einstein and Tesla share grave looks, Einstein immediately getting up and leaving the room afterwards. Tesla bites her lip, slamming her fist down on the table before grabbing a manila envelope, crossing the room over to Welt with an angry stride.
She hands him the report with watery eyes, apologizes with a gentle touch to his shoulder, then exits the room.
Welt immediately knows something was very wrong. Tesla rarely was emotional without getting angry; if it was something that he did wrong, he'd be sitting in a lecture right now. Besides, she had already scolded him for playing hero. This was something much worse.
His mind works in autopilot, he falls into the empty seat at the desk. Welt pulls the report into his lap, and his heart sinks when he sees it's your Valkyrie profile. His eyes move to the bottom of the page, fighting the panic welling up in his chest.
19xx - Killed in battle against the Herrscher of the Void alongside Cheng Lixue. Body retrieved by Schicksal.
Welt reads the words over and over, as if the repetition would somehow change their meaning. His eyes dart up to see the picture of you in the corner of your file. In the picture you were shining, alive.
You were just 18, then, recently graduated from St. Freya's. He hadn't met you yet, but you had told him many stories about your time there. You even expressed interest in teaching there one day, once you weren't needed on Squad Snow Wolf.
Welt sets the folder on his desk in a neat pile, and buries his face in his hands. He should have been there; should have known you would've done something reckless. He could save billions of people as a Herrscher, but he couldn't save the one person who he loved more than the world.
Welt hopes that in your last moments, you knew how loved you were.
When Tesla comes to check on him later, he's asleep, but she can see that he had been grieving. His face is red, eyes puffy; curled up like he intended to suffer alone. Just like he did as a boy.
It was meant to be a quick stop at a smaller planet. Somewhere near the Xianzhou Luofu where they could rest after they dealt with the Stellaron crisis. Himeko asserted that all of them deserved a little break.
Himeko ended up choosing a rich planet that traded often with the Luofu; they even had a huge shopping district that March 7th just had to see. March 7th had dragged Stelle and himself along for the trip, and somewhere along the line he had gotten separated from the pair of lovebirds.
Oh well, better to give them some time alone, he thinks.
Welt sighs as he sits down on a bench. The suns shine brightly in the sky as he takes in the sights. Outside the shopping district it was mostly quiet, save for the people training across the courtyard. If he squints hard enough, he can just barely see what they're doing.
He becomes so engrossed watching them spar that he hears it before he sees it. A loud whizzing noise that has him casting his body towards the end of the bench, away from whatever was coming straight at him.
"Apologies." The person calls, jogging on over to the bench. Another inch and the spear would've lodged into his arm. He can feel the cold radiate off of it. He scoots over as far as he can, adjusting his glasses. "I'm so sorry, I didn't think my sparring partner would dodge."
Welt finally looks up at the person who had almost killed him, and the words catch in his throat.
It was you, maybe a little taller, a little older than he remembers, but still you. There is no world, no lifetime in which he wouldn't recognize you.
Welt had thought the ghosts of those he left behind could be ignored. Himeko, Bronya, even the one who looked like Otto... he was fine worrying over them from a distance. He knew that they weren't the same people he knew; their faces might be the same, but their personalities, their destinies were not.
But you... he never expected to see you. On lonely nights he found himself pondering the what-ifs, but he dismissed the possibilities as foolish whims. Even if he did find your counterpart, it still wouldn't be the same person he knew as a best friend, as his only love.
"Joachim?" You say, and he flusters. It had been so long since he heard your voice say his name; his heart races at the mere word.
"How did you...?" He starts, clearing his throat. "How did you know my name?"
Your eyes widen in shock, hand covering your mouth. "Sorry, I didn't... You just look like someone I know. Knew."
Welt wants to press you more, he wants to surge forward and pull you close and live in your embrace for an eternity. But instead he grips his cane tighter. He needed to control himself, like he did around every other counterpart of his own world.
"I was going to say the same thing about you." Gentle. The two of you stare at each other for a long moment, not daring to breathe, lest it shatter the illusion. You're the first to look away, eyes growing glassy as you force back the tide of emotion building in your chest.
"I need to get back to training." You say simply, tapping your lance against the earth.
And before he can get your name, to see if it's the same as the you he knew, you run off back to your sparring partner.
When you're out of sight, Welt feels it hard to breathe. He shouldn't leave you behind; he should reach out his hand and talk to you. Just for a little while, just to satiate that nagging feeling taking root in his chest.
And yet he can't bring himself to follow. The world around him feels hazy, his whole body aching with longing. He walks around the grounds aimlessly until the suns set in the sky, telling himself over and over that this wasn't really you. That his incessant curiosity would only get you both hurt.
But when he closes his eyes that night, he can't help but hope that he would see you again.
Your name is the same.
Though, that should be the last thing on his mind as you pull your lance out of a dead Voidranger; its body disintegrating into the ether.
"Are you guys alright?" You ask, looking only at March 7th and Stelle. Your chest heaves with effort as you sheath your lance into the ground, leaning on it for support. "I didn't think that the Antimatter Legion had a presence here... This is very troubling."
"Yes, I'm fine!" March 7th speaks first, eyes glittering with excitement. "More than fine, actually! The way you and your friend swooped in like that was so cool! Can you teach me how to do that?!"
"You want her to teach you how to... swoop?" Stelle answers, scratching her cheek in confusion.
"Ugh, you know what I mean! Like make that dramatic and dashing entrance!" March clasps her hands together, lost in some fantasy. "You have a lance, Stelle, I'm sure you could be that charming if you tried."
Stelle mumbles something, and Welt steps in before the two can start their playful bickering. Your partner, a girl that looks about Stelle's age, calls your name. Whatever words the two of you exchange next are lost on him; he rolls your name around in his mind until you turn back to March.
"If you're interested in training with us, you could always join in one of our sparring sessions." You fiddle with the sleeve of your uniform. "I'm not sure how long you guys are staying, but if you have time I'd enjoy seeing an outlander's fighting style."
"You'll do it, won't you, Stelle?" March tugs at Stelle's sleeve, and Stelle shrugs at you. "And you too, Mr. Yang!"
Welt finally meets your eyes, and you smile sheepishly, obviously not expecting March to volunteer him for the training too. After you tell her the date and time, March skips off, her hand in Stelle's.
Without the crutch of March 7th, Welt feels himself not knowing what to say to you. You refused to even look at him, and he didn't want to make you uncomfortable.
He would be okay with the rejection. In some ways, it would be better than you accepting him. It had been twenty years since your death, but Welt was just starting to rid himself of the guilt that came from not being able to protect you.
Time could heal some wounds, others would just bleed and bleed and bleed. Your death was one he knew he would never fully recover from. Seeing another version of you older and alive only made those old wounds ache. Like this is the you he could've been chasing the stars with.
"I'm sorry for them, they're a handful." He says, voice shaky. "Thank you for stepping in, though. I didn't want the girls to have to fight on our vacation."
"It's my job." You say. "It can get pretty rowdy over here, with how close we are to the Luofu. Most people here are merchants though... If we weren't here, they couldn't protect themselves."
"That's very admirable of you." Welt remembers you saying something similar as to why you became a Valkyrie. He adjusts his glasses, hoping you don't see the flush on his cheeks. "Most people wouldn't be brave enough to take up such a calling."
You shrug. "I actually joined on a whim. My family are traders, but I just felt like the universe was telling me to join. Like protecting people was my purpose." When Welt goes silent, you add: "Sorry, I don't know why I'm telling you this. You're not..."
"It's okay, I enjoy listening to your voice." Welt steps closer to you, but you step back. "I..." He starts, but can't bring himself to voice his feelings. To tell the you in front of him about the you from his world. "Never mind. I should go. It'll be dark soon. I... hope to see you again."
When you don't answer, he turns to leave.
"Wait." You say, clutching his sleeve. He can feel your nails dig into his arm through the fabric; Welt has to stop himself from shivering. "You're... okay, right? You didn't get hurt?"
Welt swallows, the urgency in your eyes making him feel hot. "Yes, I'm fine. You got here before it could really do much."
You hold eye contact with him, your jaw clenching tight. "I saw you step in front of them when that enemy first appeared. Are you sure it didn't hurt you?"
"...It did hit me, but I'm fine. Just some light bruising."
Your grip on him tightens. "Are you sure? I... don't want you to lie for my sake. There's a clinic nearby, I don't mind taking you there."
Welt's gaze softens. He almost wants to take up the offer to spend more time with you. "Yes, I promise you."
You release his sleeve, walking back over to retrieve your lance. He feels himself missing the contact.
"Okay, good. I just know... my Joachim would lie about that kind of thing to put my mind at ease." You shake your head, expression heavy with grief. "But you're not him. When I look at you, I forget myself. I apologize."
Himeko crosses her legs, picking up her teacup on the round table in front of her. Welt squirms under her inquisitive gaze.
"You've been acting strange lately." Himeko taps a manicured nail against the glass, inhaling the scent of her 'coffee'. Welt wonders how she can stand it. "I know we both have our secrets, but something is obviously bothering you. I wish you would tell me what it is."
Welt pretends to take a sip of the coffee Himeko made him, making an exaggerated noise to show his approval. Welt had always been a tea person, anyways, and the black sludge Himeko made did not change his mind whatsoever.
"I... am not sure what you mean." He replies, eyes flicking to the floor.
"See? You can't even look at me when you say that." She rolls her eyes. "Darling, if something happened on this planet, I need to know."
Welt sighs, deeply. "Something did happen, but it's nothing you need to worry about."
"Nothing I need to know about, or nothing you want to tell me." Himeko sets her teacup down, focusing all her attention onto Welt. "I want to know if something's bothering you."
"I just... saw someone who looked like someone from my world." He swirls the coffee in his cup absentmindedly.
"Oh? Was it like what happened with Luocha?" She leans forward, red hair falling onto her shoulders. Welt can't help but think her curiosity was just like the Himeko he had once knew. He can't help but smile to himself.
"No, nothing like him." His voice is firm. "It was... someone important to me."
Her eyebrows raise, eyes bright with interest. "Oh? An old friend? ...An old flame?"
Welt takes a sip of the 'coffee'. Maybe if he died here he would be able to dodge her questions. "...Something like the latter."
"What?!" She sits back, cheshire grin on her face. "Mr. Yang, you never told me you had a lover back home!"
Welt's expression falls, and Himeko notices immediately. She quickly apologizes.
"Oh. Did... did something happen to them?" Himeko frowns sympathetically, patting his hand. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have assumed."
"It's fine. It was... a very long time ago." He admits. "But even so, seeing them again, even if it isn't them... I want to talk to them more. I miss their voice, I miss seeing them... Talking to them eases some of that ache."
"Then why not talk to them? To them, you're a stranger, right? It couldn't hurt anything."
"But they knew a version of me." Welt sets his coffee down, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "They knew my name instantly."
Himeko is quiet for a minute, turning his words over in her mind.
"You don't have to listen to me, but if I was in your situation... I would want to get to know them." Himeko smiles gently. "Welt, not many people get a second chance with a loved one. You don't have to feel the same way for them that you felt for the version of them that you knew, but the way I see it... It's easy to see that you feel guilty for losing them, maybe talking to them would help lessen that guilt. And if they lost their version of you, I'm sure it would be the same for them. Call it closure for the both of you."
Welt's eyes feel glassy; emotion threatening to choke him. Himeko was right. Denying himself would only leave him with one more ghost. He had enough of those for one lifetime.
"Thank you, I think I will."
Welt decides to take up March 7th when she asks him to come and spar with you. Stelle decides she would go too, if only to show off for March 7th.
Stelle announces that she'll go first, and it's hard to take his eyes off the two of you. March 7th bounces excitedly on her heels beside him, cheering on Stelle as Stelle readies her lance to fight you.
You roll your shoulder, readying your own lance. Welt sees a determination in your eyes that he hadn't seen in a long while.
You and Stelle trade blows, but it was obvious that you were a much more experienced fighter. Stelle liked to overwhelm her opponents with a show of force, but you were more lithe on your feet. You move quickly, not letting any of Stelle's blows land. The you of his world was an A-rank Valkyrie, but even so you were still green to the title before your passing. Here, you seemed more confident, your moves fluid and graceful, but still powerful.
After a few rounds, Stelle concedes, running a hand through her sweaty hair. She uses her lance to propel herself off of the ground, going over to rest on the sidelines with March. You look relatively unfazed as you catch your breath.
"Mr. Yang, it's your turn!" March yells, pushing him forward. His glasses nearly fall off from the force. Maybe she should be the one fighting you...
"Well?" You say, cocking an eyebrow. You lean against your lance. "You wanna spar?"
"I don't... I mean..." Welt starts. "I didn't think I'd be fighting you."
"Aw, c'mon, Mr. Yang! Don't be scared!" March 7th winks at him. "We'll be cheering you on, right, Stelle?"
Stelle gives a lazy thumbs up, still laying in the grass. Welt sighs, knowing he can't get out of this; not when his two girls were cheering him on. And especially not when you were there, too.
"Well, alright. I suppose I can go a round or two." Welt picks up his cane; his ever reliable Star of Eden. "If you don't mind, that is."
"I'm down. Just don't go easy on me, okay?" You look serious, readying your lance. Welt nods, announcing that he's ready; it's you that makes the first move.
As you rush toward him, he realizes how much faster you were than he was. Were you holding back against Stelle? He just barely manages to dodge, losing his footing as he does so.
You take advantage of that and slam the side of your lance into his ribs, hard. Welt winces, stumbling back, managing to slow you down with the Star's gravitational powers. Stuck and slowed, you launch your lance at him, ice crystals forming underneath its path. He ducks just in time, but you've already managed to close the distance between you two. You were relentless.
You both trade blows for almost an hour after that, but it was obvious that you were wearing Welt out. Exhausted from just watching, March announces your victory, and drags you and Welt along to get victory dinner together.
Welt doesn't miss your smile as March takes her hand into yours.
The cool night air doesn't bother him when he sits at your side. The indentation where your lance lodged was still in the bench; he can't help but smile.
Dinner was nice, March 7th seemed to pick up on Welt's fondness for you and made sure to have you both sit across from each other. You were a little more open when it wasn't just you and him; you laughed and told stories about your home planet. He enjoyed listening to your voice.
It was him who asked you to join him on a walk. You had seemed hesitant to accept, but did so anyways. He was glad.
"You're a very talented fighter." He says, sincere. "It's been a while since I've been bested like that."
"You were holding back." You shake your head. "I would almost be mad, but it's so like you. Or, the you I knew, I guess."
"I didn't want to hurt you." Welt grabs his ribs subconsciously; he can feel that they're already starting to bruise. "But it seems like I didn't need to hold back."
"...I just wanted to see how strong you were." You lean back, the golden hour glow making you look breathtakingly beautiful. Welt finds himself unable to look away. He wanted to commit this moment to memory before it slipped out of his grasp. "You're definitely stronger than he was. That's good."
Welt feels himself dancing on an invisible line, but he can't live with the regrets. He has to know. "What happened? To your version of me?"
You laugh, bitterly, feet kicking into the dirt. "He was always playing the hero. Rushing into danger so that no one else would have to... It was one of the things I admired about him before I started dating him. And after... it was one of the things we argued about the most."
Welt had heard this song before; you and Tesla would always scold him for acting recklessly. But he had a Herrscher core that he could rely upon, he's guessing your version of him did not.
When he's silent, you continue on. "It was just supposed to be a routine thing, you know. We were investigating a case about some stolen goods... but it turned out to be a trap. The guys expected us to come and... I was just too slow. They shot him before I even had a chance to react."
Welt puts his hand on your shoulder, but you pull away, sniffling. "It wasn't your fault."
"I know, I know. I've been told that a hundred times but... when you watch someone you love bleed out in front of you and you can't do anything... It just feels like it was. Like I should've been more careful or something." You shake your head. "Joachim was... he was supposed to be a teacher, anyways. He joined us because he needed the money. He shouldn't have been there."
Welt adjusts his glasses, thinking of how similar he was to your Joachim. Maybe if he hadn't met Welt Joyce, maybe if he didn't take up the mantle of Herrscher from him, this too would've been his fate.
"He seemed like a good man. I'm so, so sorry." Welt's voice is gentle. He wants to say more, but knows that words can do little to alleviate the pain of loss. All he can do is sit and listen.
You wipe your eyes with a sleeve, trying to even your breathing. Welt's hand lingers in the air, as if wanting to wipe away the tears spilling down your cheeks. "He was. He was the best." You sniffle, shaking your head. "I miss him every day."
"I know how you feel... I lost my version of you, too." He smiles, sympathetically. "It was over twenty years ago but I think about them every single day."
You look up at him, eyes glassy with tears. "What happened to them?"
He hadn't talked about your death since the day he found out. He didn't like to remember you that way; not when you were so vibrant in his memory, so full of life. When he talked about you, he told others his fondest memories of you. So that your memory would transcend time.
You deserved to be remembered.
"There was a... world-ending level threat on my home planet. I had fought as long as I could, but eventually I was too injured to go on. That's when... them and their squad member challenged the enemy to a fight. It was really a distraction so their friend could get away safely... They... were impaled by a lance." Welt leans forward in his lap, rubbing his face with his hands. "I always feel like I could have done more."
You touch his arm, so feather-light he's sure he imagined it. "Hey. If the other version of me volunteered to do that then... I'm sure they knew the possible outcomes." You give him a watery smile. "I don't think they would want you to feel guilty about it. I wouldn't."
Welt has to blink back tears. It was beyond cathartic, hearing that in your voice. "The other version of me wouldn't want you to feel any guilt either. It wasn't your fault, what happened. You deserve to be at peace."
You nod, slowly. He can still sense some hesitancy from you; it seemed your wound was much fresher than his own. Maybe if he kept reminding you then you would one day believe it.
The night grows dark as the two of you sit there, in a peaceful silence. You both think on happier days, and soon your head falls onto his shoulder.
"Maybe... maybe a change of scenery will help." Welt says, the stars above as your only witness. "What would you say about coming on a trip on the Astral Express with me?"
