Work Text:
“You’re leaving?” she asks as she slides into the booth and sits beside me, a colorful, half-filled cocktail in her hand.
I glance at her momentarily, taking in how her long blonde hair is pulled back in a loose ponytail, revealing her bare shoulders that the thin straps of her summer dress reveal. Her fair cheeks are flushed, the rouge creeping down her slender neck from the alcohol she’s been drinking. Her cool blue eyes regard me, waiting for a response. I clear my throat, putting down the beer that I’d been sipping for the majority of the evening. Even though I should be celebrating, there’s this bittersweet feeling deep in my gut and the last thing I need is to be plastered while saying goodbye to my friends.
“Yeah,” I answer. “My flight’s tomorrow afternoon.”
Navia’s face shifts, her naturally beautiful smile gracing her lips. “That’s exciting. To the west coast, right?”
I’m surprised that she even recalls where I was moving. The last time we’d seen one another was a couple of months ago and I had only mentioned it in a fleeting conversation amongst a group of people. She’s always been attentive and a good listener, a trait that her friends always appreciated.
“Right. There’s a new case I’ve been assigned to,” I explain. I’d never thought about living out there, but all of the things I’ve heard about the area have been wonderful. Traveling has been something familiar to me for many years at this point. Working for the DEA as an agent meant long stints in different places around the US, so to be leaving New York was just part of the plan at this point.
“I bet you’re looking forward to some more action.” She leans in closer to me, her shoulder bumping into my arm. “I honestly can’t imagine traveling as often as you do.”
“You get used to it,” I respond. “How’s Spina di Rosula been doing?”
She lifts her head and shifts subtly to square herself to me. “My father’s recovery is going well and I know we’re so close to cracking this case.”
I nod, recalling the first time I’d heard that Navia worked for her father’s private investigation organization. It had surprised me at first, not having pegged Navia to be in such a field, but as soon as I realized how intelligent, charismatic, and intuitive she was, it all made sense. I hadn’t been able to disclose my position at the DEA or the specifics of my cases, but there were many aspects of our fields that we had found similarities in.
“That’s good to hear. You’ll have to let me know when you do.”
Navia holds my gaze and then a tight-lipped smile spreads over her face. “You know you always tell me to text you, but then you rarely respond.” She cocks her head and waits for my response, but I’m not sure what to tell her.
I can’t tell her that I’ve been keeping my distance from her on purpose. It’s hard to get close to someone when you travel so often and it’s even harder to get close to someone that you’re attracted to. Ever since the first time our mutual friend had introduced us, I’d been floored by her natural beauty, her kind heart, and her commitment to always doing what was right. But no matter how many things I knew I liked about her, I couldn’t take any steps forward. Navia had never shown any signs that she was queer and in all honesty, she seemed as straight as they come. She has been so charismatic and confident, always surrounded by interested men and dating the ones that caught her eye. I don’t think she’s stayed with any of them long term, but never had I seen her show any interest in women.
“I- It’s hard to keep up with messages from work and everything,” I say, trying to give a reasonable reason for not responding.
“Then why offer? Is it just a common courtesy at this point?”
I know Navia’s not one to beat around the bush, but to have her ask a question so point-blank catches me off guard. I clear my throat and face forward, grabbing my beer to take a sip.
“Even if I’m not the best at responding, I do appreciate and like seeing your messages,” I admit honestly.
“You have an odd way of showing it.”
“I, well…” my voice trails off as I put down my drink, unsure of how to respond.
“Can I be forward with you just this once since you’re leaving soon?” Navia asks out of the blue.
I turn my head and stare at her, not having any clue as to what she’d like to say.
“I’ve had this massive crush on you since that hiking trip we all went on and I just… I can’t figure you out, Clorinde. It’s like you want to be my friend or get to know me and then when it’s even close to remotely happening, you go radio silent. But it doesn’t matter at this point.” Navia sighs and starts to slide out of the booth.
I’m completely stunned, unable to process everything that she’s said and by the time it finally dawns on me, she’s already halfway across the bar. I quickly slide out of the booth and stride hastily forward, pushing my way through the patrons that are mingling in groups.
“Navia!” I call out and she turns instantly, not used to hearing me raise my voice. “Wait a second,” I say, reaching out to wrap my hand gently around her wrist. If she’s not within my grasp I feel as if this moment would be fleeting and she’d be leaving once again before I can even tell her that her feelings are reciprocated.
“What?” she asks, her eyes flitting across the features of my face, trying to read my expression although I know it’s hard. I’ve always been told I can be cold, that I come off as unapproachable. Even though Lyney and Lynette vouch for my kindness, it’s not enough when I know that my actions convey otherwise.
“I, I didn’t think… I had no idea,” I finally manage to get out. I don’t know what to say or how to approach this.
“How? I’ve been showing my interest in you for years, Clorinde. I have made it quite clear.”
“No, you haven’t.” I don’t mean to confront what she’s said, but I can’t recall a single time she’d done so.
“How someone so intelligent can be so block-headed I will not understand,” Navia sighs. She steps forward into my space and places her hand on my shoulder, the warmth seeping through the fabric of my blouse. “I’ve invited you out for drinks, flirted with you during Lyney’s movie nights, and so much more, Clorinde. At a certain point, I just told myself you weren’t interested.”
“I had no idea,” I repeat.
“And if you did would that have changed anything between us?”
“I–”
Three Years Ago
“I know you’re not one for big gatherings, but you’ve got to come!” Lyney enthuses from a safe distance away from the fencing piste.
“And why is that?” I ask, parrying Lynette’s lunge and twisting the blade subtly to shift her tip away from my body. I shuffle back a few steps, waiting for Lynette to overstretch which would allow me to take advantage of our height differences.
“I have some friends I think you’d get along with. You also need a break. You’ve been here for three whole months already and haven’t done anything for yourself,” Lyney tries to convince.
“I’ve been busy.” Just then Lynette’s attack opens her up and I surge forward, the point of the blade pressing into her shoulder. The blade bends before I retract it, going back to reset for the next play.
“If she doesn’t want to come, she doesn’t have to,” Lynette defends.
“But she should and she will,” Lyney says adamantly. “Just this once, pleeeassse. If you don’t like them then I promise I won’t force you to come out again.”
“Fine. But just this once,” I say, echoing his words.
When Lyney had said it would be a large gathering, I hadn’t expected it to be quite as extravagant as it was. Lyney had always had connections, but to see his friend have such an ungodly mansion was a lot to take in. He’d been performing his magic on Broadway, garnering more and more attention as he and Lynette achieved the impossible. But along with their growing fame, they’d also made friends with other high-profile performers.
I nervously worry my lower lip as guests filter into the mansion, Lyney, Lynette, and Freminet walking along with me. I’m glad they helped me pick out the cocktail dress I’m wearing. It’s a deep violet and flows naturally around my curves to accentuate my athletic build. It’s not often that I dress up to this extent, but if I hadn’t then I’d be sticking out like a sore thumb and most likely wouldn’t even be permitted inside.
By the time we do make it through the grande entryway and into the lavish foyer, I’m already overwhelmed. The live music combined with the conversations of easily a hundred people is a lot to take in. And by the time I’ve got a drink in my hand, I’m ready for another to ease some of the tension in my mind and body.
“There she is!” Lyney shouts out, grabbing my hand and dragging me through the crowd. I have no idea where we’re going, but I don’t have any choice but to follow.
“Lyney!” a shorter, blonde woman greets. She’s surrounded by men dressed in perfectly pressed suits and coifed hair. It’s as if they’ve all been copied and pasted except for the varying colors of their hair and eyes. But the woman is focused on Lyney, who she hugs warmly and whispers something to him that I can’t catch.
Lyney steps back and motions to me, his performer’s flare coming out naturally and I feel my cheeks warm up a bit from the attention of the many eyes landing on me.
“This is the friend I mentioned, Clorinde.” He then motions to the woman. “This is Navia.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” I quickly say to be polite. Her lips have a subtle pink hue to them from the gloss she’s wearing and she smiles so genuinely that it feels as if it’s just the two of us and a throng of people aren’t surrounding us.
“Likewise. Lyney has told me a lot about you.”
I raise one eyebrow in curiosity at Lyney, but he shrugs it off as he hooks his arm into Navia’s and then mine.
“If you’ll excuse us,” he says to leave the men Navia had been conversing with. “They’re such a bore, especially that Antoine,” he laughs. “Let’s get some drinks!”
I glance over Lyney to catch Navia’s eyes on me. She shoots a smile at me once more and I jerk my head away to look forward. Now that I’m not having to think of what to say, it hits me that she’s stunning. I’m sure that she must be a performer, an actress maybe. The way her voluminous blonde locks frame her face and fall down her back, her expensive black dress hugs her curves, and her impeccable makeup accentuates her vibrant eyes, I can’t imagine she’d work in any other field.
The open bar is crowded, but Lyney finds some way of pushing through and he quickly orders drinks for us, already knowing what his friends prefer. Once he receives them, he turns and hands the glasses to us and leans back against the counter.
“Furina always throws the best bashes,” he says jovially before taking a long drink. “This is Clorinde’s first time at an event like this, so be nice, Navia.”
“Have I ever not been?” she asks playfully.
“I can recall a few times,” he winks at her, winning a light laugh.
I glance at her over the rim of my glass and I can’t help but feel drawn to her. Her laugh is so warm and there’s something so comforting in the way it sounds.
“I’ll be nice…” She looks my way and smiles again and I’m not sure if she knows how not to. “I promise.” She punctuates her words by placing her hand gently on my forearm and giving it a soft squeeze. “So what brings you to New York?” she asks.
“Work,” I answer.
Her eyes narrow ever so slightly and I’m sure it’s due to the short response.
I clear my throat and add, “I travel a lot for it actually. So I’m not sure how long I’ll be out here, but it’s been nice. Different.”
She seems to warm up to this and nods. “It’s a lot,” she says in understanding.
“And it’s wonderful!” Lyney adds. He’s about to say something else but stops when he sees someone he recognizes over my shoulder. “I’m going to leave you two ladies, but have a good time. Especially you, Clorinde.” He looks pointedly at me and then weaves his way through the crowd, leaving just the two of us.
“He’s never in one spot for long,” Navia chuckles. “So how do you know the Lemaires?”
“I was stationed here a while back and met Lynette through a fencing organization. We’ve been sparring partners since and I met the brothers through her,” I explain.
“Fencing? You don’t meet many with the hobby.”
“Yeah, my parents introduced it to me at a young age and it’s been something I try to do when I can,” I explain.
“I’ve heard Lynette is quite talented in it, so you must be formidable yourself.”
“I’m alright. It’s just a hobby.”
“Wel-” Navia’s words cut off as she stumbles forward. I reach out instinctually and support her with my free hand. We both watch as a man staggers through the crowd, pushing and shoving and completely inebriated.
“Are you alright?” I ask as she rights herself and glances down at her dress that is now absorbing half her drink.
“Yes.” She sighs as she raises her hand and gets the bartender’s attention. “May I have some napkins please,” she requests. Once she has them in hand she starts cleaning herself up as best she can. “This always happens,” she mutters as she does so.
“Can I do anything to help?” I ask, knowing full well there’s nothing I can really do.
“No, it’s fine. I swear this always happens. The last time Furina threw a party like this, I left with my clutch covered in a woman’s drink. I’ll just have to send this to the dry cleaners in the morning. But enough of this,” she says. “What work has you traveling so much?”
“I work for the Drug Enforcement Administration.”
“Lyney said you’re an interesting woman but I did not expect that. I’m actually a private investigator. Many of the people you see around here are clients of my father and I,” Navia discloses.
A shocked expression seems to spread over my face as Navia laughs.
“It’s not what you expected, was it?”
“Honestly, no,” I confess.
“Most wouldn’t believe it, but my father created his own company, and ever since I was a child I’d wanted to work with him. He made a name for himself and now we work discretely for some of the biggest names in the city,” she explains.
“That’s really amazing. Do you have any crazy stories you can share or would that be against your contracts?” I ask, truly intrigued by this woman.
“Oh I have many,” she says warmly and before long I’m completely captivated by the stories she’s sharing with me. She’s so animated and passionate about her work that the party seems to fall into the background and I’m not overwhelmed anymore.
Surprisingly we spend most of the night together, her sharing whatever comes to mind and me adding some of my own experiences with the DEA. It’s not until she’s called away by one of the men she’d been talking to when Lyney first found her that our time ends. She’s polite as she’s whisked away and as soon as she’s gone I instantly regret not getting her number.
Two Years Ago
There are times in your life when you realize that you’re surrounded by people that just, get you. And this feeling was often fleeting for me due to traveling so frequently and not being able to really let any roots spread. But today feels so different. I’m surrounded by friends who feel as if they’ve known me for more years than not and for once in my life I’m hoping to stay as long as possible.
It’s not usual that I make time for myself, but there is one thing I do make time for every month. Once a month Lyney hosts a movie night. The films tend to be avant-garde and indie-focused but it was something I never minded. On top of the often times good movies, the company was pleasant. It was the only place I really got to see Navia regularly. Seldomly I’d see her at other group gatherings, but I always knew she’d be at movie night.
After the third time we’d met, we finally exchanged numbers but we still hadn’t spent time one-on-one. We’d text here and there but the conversations tended to fall by the wayside, whether due to me being too busy or our conversations naturally ending. As much as I grew to enjoy her attention and time, it was growing ever clearer to me that she was as straight as they came. I’d moved past the idea of pursuing her, set on just being friends with the kind and intelligent, multi-faceted woman.
“What are you thinking about?!”
I start as arms wrap around my neck and petite hands are clasped together and rest at the center of my chest. I glance up and back from my seat on the couch to find Navia’s face above mine, her now familiar smile directed right at me.
“Nothing, really,” I mumble.
“I don’t buy that.”
“And why’s that?” I quip as I right my head.
She takes this opportunity to lean closer, her cheek a breath’s width away from touching mine. “I tried to get your attention and usually you respond right away. So something must be going on in this head of yours.”
“Seriously, it’s noth-”
“Sorry to interrupt, but we’re making the popcorn. What kind did you two want?”
Navia instantly pulls away and focuses on Lynette. “Kettle corn for me-”
“Just butter,” I add right after.
“Okay.” Lynette glances at me as if she’s about to say something more, but doesn’t.
She leaves and before I know it, Navia is sitting beside me, already grabbing the blanket from the arm of the couch and draping it over the both of us. It’d become a sort of unspoken ritual at this point. It had started with Navia asking to sit next to me, then led to the sharing of a blanket on a winter evening, to us sharing without even a word spoken. In all honesty, it wouldn’t have been as bad for me, but so often Navia would sit closer than needed. She’d cuddle up against my side and whisper random thoughts or reactions in my ear.
I know this shouldn’t bother me, but it does. She’s never been shy with affectionate touches, one to always hug hello and goodbye to her friends. She’d brush her hand along my back, cling to my arm when walking and even hold my hand to drag me along to something. But what frustrated me, was that she did this with everyone. She’d be so warm and friendly, make you feel as if you’re special and then do it for her other friends. I’m not different to her, but she’s so much more to me, and as much as I try to hide my feelings, it gets harder and harder each time I see her.
“We’re watching a horror movie tonight,” Navia lets me know. “So if I end up sticking closer to you, you better protect me,” she says playfully.
“It’s not real,” I mutter although I’m not a fan of horror movies myself.
“That doesn’t mean it can’t be scary.”
“Fine. I’ll protect you,” I say although it seems like a silly concept to me.
“Good. Is there a way I can thank my savior later?”
I chuckle and shake my head. “Don’t be ridiculous.”
Navia shifts and I feel her hand on my cheek, turning my head so that our faces are square. “I’m serious. We could go to that café you like, the one with the special deli sandwiches and the amazing macarons.”
“Oh, we could bring Lynette, she loves the croissants there,” I blurt out.
“Sure,” Navia says as she looks over her shoulder. She sighs and then gets up. “I’m going to go check on what’s taking them so long.”
One Year Ago
I laugh unabashedly as Navia tells me about her most recent PI case. It had to do with a celebrity’s cat going missing and some ludicrous chase that Navia and her father had ended up in due to the cat being extremely skittish.
“When they say cats have nine lives, I think it might be true,” Navia giggles. “Oh, we’re almost there,” she points out.
Although Navia had invited a handful of us out to a special farmer’s market, I had been the only one available to go. This had surprised me a lot, the twins usually were free during the days and it wasn’t until evenings that their schedules were more booked due to their performances. The only one that really made sense was Freminet since he tended to avoid outings if his siblings couldn’t make it.
It had been nice walking around the park with her one-on-one and getting to listen to her stories, reminiscent of the way we had first met. For some reason, she also seemed even more beautiful than usual. Her makeup wasn’t as heavy and she was dressed so casually. She had clearly catered her outfit for the warm summer weather, wearing a simple crop top and high-waisted jean shorts. Atop her head was a wide-brim hat, her long blonde hair cascading down her back in soft waves. She was gorgeous and her blue eyes seemed to sparkle in a way I’d never noticed before.
“Are you looking for anything in particular?” I ask.
“Nope. Just wanted to relax and have some fun today.” The smile she shares with me is so bright and I can tell she’s truly happy. She takes my hand into her own, dragging me down the pathway toward the array of white tents of the farmer’s market.
“I believe I have gotten too many things,” Navia laughs as she takes in the multiple bags she’s carrying along with the ones in my hands. I’d only gotten a single pint of fresh berries, which I didn’t even need a bag for. The berries had luckily found a home in one of Navia’s bags that I happened to be carrying.
“Everything you got was a good purchase.”
“If you say so,” she says, nudging her elbow against my arm. “Would you want to walk around some more?”
I glance at her face and then back at the bags we’re carrying.
“We can drop these off in my car. I just don’t want to call it a day yet.”
I nod, unable to tell her no.
“I’ve been wanting to show you a song,” Navia says as she pulls out her phone along with a set of wired earbuds. The two of us had been sharing music with one another, I’m not sure when it really started but it was always nice receiving a text with a random link to a new song. It had been something unique and put a smile on my face even if I didn’t always like the music she shared.
“Oh, okay. Want to sit at that bench?” I ask.
“That’d be perfect.”
We walk the twenty or so paces to the park bench and both take a seat. She plugs in the earbuds and then motions for me to get closer. I scooch over, our thighs almost touching as she puts one bud in her ear and then gently puts the other in mine. She’s so close that I can’t stop my eyes from dipping down to her lips that reflect the sunlight subtly from the lipgloss that she favors. I swallow hard, my eyes dropping to the screen of her phone.
“It’s called ‘Lights Out’ by Deep Sea Diver. They opened for a concert I recently went to and I just knew I had to show them to you,” Navia explains. She checks the volume to make sure that she doesn’t blast our ears out. “Ready?”
I nod and right after she presses the play button on her phone. It doesn’t take me long to get into the song, Navia finding it easier and easier to share music that catered to my taste. I let my eyes drift shut, allowing myself to really focus on the sound, to take in the drums, the bass, the guitar, and the lead singer’s vocals. My head bobs gently and it’s not until the song starts fading out as it ends that I open my eyes and to my surprise, Navia is regarding me with the softest look possible.
I swallow the lump in my throat as she leans in a little closer and I think she’s going to kiss me. But then her eyes leave mine and they focus on the side of my face. She lifts her hand, removing the earbud from my ear and then her own. She unplugs them and bundles the cord up to shove the accessories into her pocket.
“So what’d you think?” she asks, her voice oddly less stable than usual.
“They’re really good,” I answer. “They must have been incredible live.”
“Yeah, yeah they were.”
Present Day
“And if you did would that have changed anything between us?”
“I– I want to say no, but I know that’d be a lie,” I confess.
“Your restraint is frustrating,” she huffs.
“What?” I blurt out and before I know it she’s closed the remaining space between us and is cupping my face with her soft hands.
There’s something about this woman that completely draws me in and the world around me is forgotten. I can’t take my eyes off of her and when she leans up as she guides my face down, my stomach flutters as my mind tells me this can’t be real. Those thoughts don’t leave me until I feel her soft lips pressed against mine. The touch is so light, hesitant, and wordlessly asking if this is okay. My pulse is ringing in my ears as my hands find purchase on her hips, kissing her more soundly to assure her that I want this too.
Navia gasps softly as my hands slip to the small of her waist. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t thought of this, if I hadn’t dreamed of how she felt and tasted. But nothing could compare to reality. It was as if we were meant to fit together and when she didn’t pull away and instead continued to kiss me tenderly I knew that she truly did feel the same as I felt for her.
When we finally did pull apart, my head felt floaty and my eyes continued to flit between her breathtaking eyes and her lips that were begging to be kissed again. I’m completely tongue-tied and as usual, it’s Navia who grounds me.
“So it would have changed things,” she laughs warmly as she pulls me close and hugs me, her head turns to the side and rests against my chest, surely hearing my racing heart.
“Yeah… It would have,” I answer with no doubt in my mind.
“Can I be honest with you,” I start as we walk through the busy streets of New York City towards Navia’s highrise apartment.
She leans into me, pressing her cheek against my shoulder. “Of course.”
“This might sound silly to you, but I could have sworn you were straight,” I finally say, trying my best to not insult her in any way.
She laughs freely and she tugs us to a stop. We’re in the middle of the sidewalk as she pulls me in for another kiss, her lips curled up into a smile as she does so. It’s quick though and before I know it, she’s dragging me down the sidewalk again.
“Still think I’m straight?” she asks.
“Not anymore,” I chuckle.
For once the warm summer night doesn’t bother me. I don’t mind how it’s humid and how it makes my skin sticky. I don’t mind the bit of sweat that gathers at my hairline because all that I can focus on is Navia and how lovely her laugh is. How she’s always able to smile and make me do the same. I wish for nothing more than for this night to last forever.
It’s actually fun walking through the city, something I tend to find overwhelming most of the time. But instead, I’m looking at things differently and living in the moment as Navia pulls us down a street that has fewer people on it. We walk a couple more blocks until she’s pulling a key out and unlocking the door to the apartment building. The place is so close to downtown and it’s not somewhere I’d want to live, but it makes sense for Navia. She’s always loved to be around people and she’s as extroverted as I am introverted.
I can’t help but gawk at the lobby and then when we’re in the large elevator, I’m about to mention how different the place is from my apartment, but no words are allowed to leave my mouth. Instead, my back is pressed against the polished wall of mirrors and her lips are on mine. A moan slips past my lips as she pushes forward, her body flush with mine and once again my heart is racing. My stomach is full of butterflies as my hand threads through her hair.
She doesn’t stop until the elevator dings and she’s whisking me away down to her apartment.
“I’m sorry for the mess. I didn’t think I’d have company tonight,” she apologizes as she pushes the door open and presses the door to the wall with her back, allowing me in. “Make yourself at home.”
“No worries,” I say as I pass through the hallway and am greeted by an open-concept living room, kitchen, and dining room. It’s a little messy with paperwork and manila folders laid out on the dining room table and coffee table in the living room. But other than that it’s clean and tidy.
“You have a really nice place,” I compliment.
Arms wrap around my waist and I feel her nuzzle her face into my back. “You could have seen it if you’d come to my housewarming party.”
“I know. But for once I wasn’t avoiding you and actually had a stakeout.”
Navia lets me go and comes to stand before me. “You avoided me?”
“Sometimes. I, um… I really liked you.”
“Wooowww,” Navia drags out. “That explains so much. You thought I was straight so you didn’t pursue anything and kept your distance.” She narrows her eyes and then her laughter echoes against the walls. “It’s almost painful how adorable you are.”
I furrow my brow and shake my head in denial.
“You are.” She moves into the kitchen and rounds the island to open the fridge. “Would you like a drink? I don’t have much, but I have some beers and ciders that some friends left.”
“A beer please.”
Navia grabs two bottles and pops them open before handing the beer to me and keeping the cider for herself. I take a sip right away, parched from the walk from the bar.
“Want to go on the balcony? The view is fantastic and the couch out there is actually stupidly comfy.”
“I’m good with whatever,” I say amiably.
“You always are,” Navia teases.
She leads me out through a large sliding glass door onto the balcony and she’s right. The view is breathtaking and is so New York. The space is decorated in such a comfortable, yet pleasing way with potted plants and earthy-toned furniture. She takes a seat on the loveseat and I follow. I leave a little space between us and sit comfortably with a bent arm against the back of the couch.
“I love to read out here. The white noise of the traffic and people below feel like home to me,” Navia says softly as she moves to rest her back against my front, cuddling close. “It’s one of the only places I can just be. I even fall asleep out here every now and again.”
“I like listening to you,” I tell her before taking another sip of my beer. “I should have told you sooner.”
“We were both fools.”
“Heh,” I chuckle. “We were.” I want to tell her that we could try and make this work, but my gut tells me that I shouldn’t. If this was fated to be a beautiful, fleeting memory then I’d still be happy.
“I was attracted to you the night we met. That big party Lyney dragged you to, you remember, right?” Navia brings up.
“I’d never forget it. It was a lot and I also got to meet you.”
Navia laughs and turns just enough to kiss the edge of my jawline. “Cheesy, but I’ll take it,” she says playfully. “I was interested in you but I really did start liking you on that hiking trip. Freminet was having a rough time and you took care of him and well… it was endearing. You come off as a little cold, but once someone gets to know you, you’re so, so kind, Clorinde.”
She shifts in my arms so that she’s facing me now and I can’t hide the blush that’s spread over my cheeks from her words. “Also women are unequivocally beautiful and I am so so so not straight.”
The blonde smiles, her eyes seeking mine and for the first time I’m closing the space between us. It’s unrestrained, both of us pouring our feelings into each second knowing that our time is limited. Time that seems to fade into nothingness as we kiss, time that speeds by and moves in slow motion all within the same moment.
She parts her lips, her tongue brushing against my lower lip and my hand comes to the back of her head, keeping her in place as the kiss deepens. We explore one another until we’re breathless and we pull away. She giggles and then her head falls and her forehead presses into my collarbone.
“I’m bi and really like women,” she laughs.
I join her, now realizing that I had been reading the situation wrong this whole time. “If it’s not clear, I really like women too… specifically you,” I confess.
She lifts her head and cradles my face with one hand. Her thumb smooths over my cheekbone and for the first time I’m holding her gaze without worrying about lingering too long.
“I’m going to miss you,” she whispers.
“I’ll miss you too,” I return.
The night proceeded along the same trajectory it had begun. We got lost in conversation, cycling between the most mundane topics to some of our deepest thoughts and feelings. We basked within each other’s presence and touch, making out as the city below grew quiet, at least as quiet as New York could get.
I groan, my neck stiff as I blink blearily. The sun is high in the sky and the summer heat is stifling. It takes me a moment to survey my surroundings, finding myself still on Navia’s balcony, the blonde sleeping soundly atop me. My long legs hang over the opposite end of the couch, my feet tingling from the lack of blood.
My back aches as I stretch to grab my phone that had fallen to the stained wood of the balcony flooring. I hold back from swearing as I see that my flight is only three hours from now. It’s a good thing that I’d squared away everything that I had needed to and just need to grab my luggage from my apartment across town.
“Hey, Navia,” I say softly, my voice a little raspy from just waking up. “I need to go.”
She groans and nuzzles into me more before sighing and lifting her head. Somehow her hair isn’t messy and her makeup hasn’t smudged at all. She’s impossibly beautiful and everything screams inside of me to cancel my flight and stay another day with her, but I know I can’t.
“Ugh, fine,” Navia grumbles in a criminally adorable way.
She rolls off of me, stretching her arms upward, the straps of the dress she still wore falling down her shoulders once she’s put her arms down. I reach out, my touch light as I put them back in place and she looks over her shoulder at me.
It’s quiet as I grab my belongings and make my way to the door. She’s lingering, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed and I know there are things that we should be saying, but I can’t. I want to remember this exactly as it already was.
“You’ll keep in touch, right?” she asks as my hand stills on the doorknob.
I glance at her and for the first time in knowing her, she looks vulnerable and almost sad. Even when her father had been injured, she had stayed optimistic, a smile still on her face when most people would have shattered and given up. A knot forms in my stomach and everything turns so bittersweet.
“I will,” I finally say.
“Good. Have a safe flight,” she says as she tugs at the front of my blouse and leans up to place one last peck on my cheek.