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It was hot. Really hot. Like the room was on fire and the flames were surrounding you. Felix grabbed his water bottle, swallowed the liquid and slid down the wall to sit on the ground, the sweat dripping down his face.
"You okay?", Minho asked, turning off the music that was blasting through the room. Felix nodded hastily, wetting his dried-out lips. "Hmm, 'm fine", he breathed out, closing his eyes. "Here", Minho threw another water bottle over to him and Felix gratefully gulped down the drink.
"Maybe we should take a break, go outside", Minho suggested after a few minutes. Felix was still panting a bit, his face pressed to the cold mirror on the wall, keeping his eyes closed, Minho himself was feeling pretty good. "No, just one more minute", he requested, stubborn as ever.
Felix took a deep breath. He had a headache and he felt dry like there was no water left in his body. He didn't know how, but he managed to stand up again and walk back into the middle of the practice room. "We can start again".
Minho looked him up and down in concern but was smarter than to ask again if Felix was feeling okay. The younger boy was stubborn as hell and wouldn't step down anyway. So, Minho turned on the music again, the beat flooding the room and making the floor vibrate.
Felix's headache increased with every step he took and the sweat got more and more, running down his face and back. He felt short of breath, like something was pressing his lungs together and the world started swaying a bit.
"Minho?", he asked quietly, stumbling over his feet and barely catching himself. Minho stopped dancing and ran to turn off the music. "Min... Hyung", Minho looked up, seeing Felix still standing where he had left him in the middle of the room.
The boy's cheeks and lips were pale, sweat covering his body and hands shaking slightly. "I don't... Feel so good", Felix sighed before his eyes rolled back and his legs gave up, his body hitting the ground with a loud thump.
"Oh fuck"
Felix needed a few minutes to be able to sit up and drink something, the world was spinning rapidly and he would definitely get a bruise where his head had hit the floor.
"I'm gonna call Chan", Minho said, reaching over to get his backpack but Felix stopped him by grabbing his wrist, his nails pressing into Minho's skin. "No! No, it's okay. He's stressed already, I'm not a baby, he doesn't need to come", Minho didn't look happy with that answer and frowned.
"You just passed out right in front of my fucking eyes, are you kidding me?", he snapped angrily. He knew this kind of behavior from Jisung but not Felix.
"Hyungie, please. I... What is he supposed to do now? I'm awake, right? We can stop practice now and go home, I'll be fine", Felix assured, looking up with big puppy dog eyes. Minho silently cursed him and his adorable features.
"I'll drive you. And you won't practice tomorrow", he demanded, avoiding Felix's eyes. The younger boy sighed but nodded, knowing that this was the best solution. "Deal".
It was game night. Or movie night. Whatever you wanna call it. Felix, Chan and Hyunjin had invited their five best friends over. Minho, Jisung, Changbin, Seungmin and Jeongin.
Minho and Jisung were sitting on the sofa (Minho was sitting on the sofa, Jisung was sitting on his lap), Changbin and Chan were in a deep talk about a song they were working on right now (bringing work home, like always), Hyunjin was messing around with Jeongin and Felix was in the kitchen with Seungmin.
"Do you need help with anything?", Seungmin asked, placing his glass on the counter. "Uhm, could you get the chips out of the cupboard?", Felix asked, he was preparing a snack plate for the others. "Sure".
The evening had been good till now, they had watched a movie, laughed and talked a lot already and there was still plenty of time. But Felix wouldn't mind if he could lay down in his warm bed now. He had been feeling off the whole day already, sweating a lot even though it wasn't that hot and fell asleep twice while cleaning the house.
The exhaustion of the past days caught up to him and it wasn't helping that Minho followed every one of his steps with cautious eyes like Felix could fall apart every second.
"These?", Seungmin asked, holding up a bag of chips. Felix looked up and nodded, "Yeah, thanks", he opened them and filled a big portion on the plate.
"Let's go!", he announced happily to Seungmin who followed him back into the living room. Hyunjin had started to annoy Jisung too which had resulted in them wrestling on the ground for no reason, Jeongin hyping them up now and then like an excited dog.
"Snacks!", Felix said when he entered the room, immediately getting the other's attention. The moment he put the plate down all of them reached forward to grab a handful of chips or peanuts. "Bringing food in here is like bringing a bunch of lions meat", Seungmin teased with a cocky smile.
Felix grinned too, taking a step back and leaning onto one of the cabinets. He felt weak or tired as if he had run a marathon without drinking a single drop of water. He just needed to support himself on something.
While the others were throwing insults back at Seungmin and stuffing their mouths with the snacks, Felix's hand grabbed the cabinet's surface that was pressing into his back. He let out a long breath and closed his eyes.
In. Hold... Out. In. Hold... Out. In. Hold...
He opened his eyes. Minho was looking at him, the others still mindlessly bickering with each other. "Everything's fine?", Minho mouthed. Felix didn't know how to react. Was he fine? He probably wouldn't die right on the spot but still... He was scared any more movement would push him over the edge of unconsciousness. "Felix?", Minho asked louder when he didn't respond. Felix grabbed the wooden surface harder.
In. Hold... Out. In. Hold... Out. In-
His legs gave up and he could feel how he fell, knocking over a lamp with his arms. The room got quiet immediately. "Felix, oh my god!", Hyunjin jumped up and stumbled over to his boyfriend. "Hey, baby. Wake up, come on", Chan appeared next to him, pulling Felix against his chest and slapping him lightly.
Felix mumbled something, squeezing his eyes and pressing himself more into Chan's chest, seeking warmth and comfort. The pounding in his head had stopped but the light of the room hurt his eyes and he just wanted to sleep.
"We are taking you to bed, okay?", Chan said, not expecting an answer and picking Felix up. Hyunjin followed his boyfriends into the bedroom, pulling back the sheets so Chan could lay Felix down.
In the living room, the five other boys were looking at each other in concern. "What was that?", Jeongin asked. "Is he sick?", Jisung wondered. "I'm sure it's just exhaustion", Changbin assured. Minho who hadn't said anything yet suddenly let go of Jisung and left the room.
"Jagi?", Jisung called but Minho didn't answer. He went straight to the bedroom, waiting impatiently in front of the door. He would tell Chan and Hyunjin now that this wasn't the first time Felix had fainted. He didn't know what they would do about it but at least they would know and keep an eye on Felix from now on. Whether it was exhaustion or something more serious, Chan and Hyunjin would want to know.
Quiet steps could be heard and then Chan opened the door. "Oh hi, Felix is sleeping", he told Minho. "Hyunjin is staying with him", he added. "Chan, I need to talk to you", Minho replied, grabbing the elder’s sleeve and pulling him into the office.
"You're scaring me, what's going on?", Chan asked. "It's about Felix. Three days ago, he fainted during practice. We were doing one of the new songs and he just fainted in the middle of it", Minho explained.
"Why didn't he tell us?", Chan wanted to know, frowning. "He said you already have too much stress and that he would go home and be okay", Minho answered. "Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, it wasn't really my business but if it happens again, you should maybe take him to a doctor", Chan nodded.
"Yeah, thanks Min... Let's go back to the living room, the others are probably almost dying from concern", both men chuckled and left the room, thoughts about the young Australian still present.
When Felix woke up again the sun was shining already. Two bodies were pressed against him, their heat making him sweat. He felt arms around his waist and a breath at his neck.
He squirmed, feeling uncomfortable with the heat and all the skin contact. "Channie, Jinnie", he whispered, trying to peel their limbs off him. Chan sat up and looked Felix up and down, still a bit sleepy.
"Hey baby, how are you feeling?", he asked gently, stroking Felix's cheek. "Hot", he answered, sitting up too and waking Hyunjin in the process.
"Good morning", he yawned. "Can we leave the bed please, I feel overwhelmed", Felix asked, scratching at his arms. "Yeah, yeah, of course", Chan replied, pulling the covers off his boyfriend.
Felix felt lightheaded when Chan grabbed his arms and helped him out of the bed but without the heat of his boyfriends' bodies, he felt better already.
"I gotta go drink something", Felix mumbled, letting go of Chan's hands and running his hands through his hair to peel it off his forehead.
"Wait, I'll help you", Chan offered but Felix pushed his hands away and shook his head. "I can drink water alone", he said. Hyunjin and Chan exchanged a few glances but Felix already left the bedroom.
"He isn't okay", Chan stated and Hyunjin nodded. "His hands were shaking when I helped him out of the bed", he added, pressing his fingers against his temple. "We should talk to him, take him to a doctor", Hyunjin suggested and Chan sighed. "We will have to drag him there". Hyunjin shrugged, "Then we will".
In the meantime, Felix had filled a glass with water and sat down at the kitchen table. Yesterday evening was replaying in his head and he felt embarrassed about it. He also feared that Minho had talked to his boyfriends.
Felix was sure that he was just having a phase of being exhausted, not enough sleep combined with work, stress and weather were getting to him and it all would be over after a few days of resting. But his boyfriends were way too protective and wouldn't let him get away with it that easily.
"Felix?", he looked up, Hyunjin and Chan were standing at the counter, arms crossed over their chests. "What?", Felix asked, already expecting his boyfriends' concerns.
"We are worried", Felix almost groaned. Of course they were and he could understand them, really, but it still annoyed him. He knew his body and how to handle it and he wasn't at the point yet where he needed medical help.
"I'm fine", he assured them, taking another sip from the water. "You didn't look fine yesterday when you fainted and almost destroyed a lamp", Hyunjin replied in disbelief. "It was a one-time thing, I swear", Felix promised but by the way Chan looked at him, almost disappointed, he knew Minho had snitched on him.
"You know it wasn't, and I know it wasn't. Felix, look. We are just worried. This could be something serious. Or not, but at least get it checked. We just want to help and ensure that you are healthy", Chan explained.
Felix jumped up from his chair, slamming his hands on the table in anger and almost knocking over his glass. "I'm not sick, why don't you get it?! I'm stressed but-", he stopped talking all of sudden, the words getting stuck in his throat.
Hyunjin and Chan looked at him, expecting his outburst to last a little longer when unexpectedly Felix's eyes rolled back and his legs gave up underneath him. He almost hit his head on the table when he fell but Hyunjin was fast enough to grab his arm and pull him away.
"Call an ambulance", Chan said, kneeling next to his boyfriend and holding up Felix's legs to help his blood circulation. Hyunjin stumbled out of the room to get his phone. Felix was such a stubborn- ugh!
Hyunjin and Chan fought for a good five minutes with the paramedic before he allowed both of them to ride in the ambulance.
Felix kept slipping in and out of consciousness but always being non-verbal, just his eyes opening now and then. Hyunjin held his hand while Chan filled out some papers from the paramedics.
"Baby please, stay awake. You have to be okay, you hear me?", Hyunjin asked, his thumb brushing over Felix's palm. "I'm so worried, Jagi", he laid his head on Felix's shoulder, breathing in his smell and taking a few calm breaths.
"You are not deadly sick", Felix clicked his tongue. He knew it! "But-", Oh god. "You are pregnant", the doctor stated. Felix blinked. "What?", he asked.
"You are nine weeks pregnant, Mister Lee", she repeated. "Oh", he didn't know what to say. He hadn't expected to have a chronic illness or cancer but being pregnant hadn't been on the list either. "Do you need some time?... Should I get your boyfriends?... Maybe another doctor?", the woman requested, her tone soft and assuring.
"I...", Felix still tried to collect his thoughts and form a correct sentence in Korean. "I want you to know that you have options, you don't have to have this baby", the doctor added. "No, I just... Didn't expect it", Felix replied. "I don't need somebody to talk, I'm okay. Just progressing".
"Good. But if you change your mind, just ask me or one of the nurses", she said. "Thank you... Oh-, uhm... Could you... Maybe keep this to yourself? I want to tell my boyfriends properly", Felix asked. "Of course. You can go home if you want, but you should rest and tell your boyfriends in the next few days, alright?". "Understood".
"You are sure that you can go home? That you are fine?", Chan asked for the third time. "Yes, Channie. I am not dying in the next two weeks, I just didn't take enough care of myself these past few days", Felix reassured.
"And that's why we are gonna do that from now on", Hyunjin decided and Chan nodded. Felix rolled his eyes playfully. These two didn't even know about him being pregnant, how were they going to act when he finally told them?
Felix already had an idea of how to tell his boyfriends. He would take a pregnancy test and then wrap it with two baby shoes. That way he could see on their faces how they understood while unwrapping. And it was more creative than just telling them!
The only problem was how he would buy the pregnancy test secretly when his boyfriends planned on supervising him 24/7 from now on. Maybe he could tell Minho and Jisung and ask them to buy one for him.
"When we are home you are going straight to bed while we prepare lunch, no arguing with that", Chan decided while helping Felix stand up. "Will you allow me to walk to the bed myself or is that forbidden too?", he asked amused. "Depends on how you feel after the car ride".
Felix fell asleep during the car ride and only woke up when Chan lay him down on the bed after carrying him inside. "Sleep some more, alright?", he whispered and kissed his forehead. Felix murmured a reply and cuddled into the pillows. He could text Minho or Jisung later.
He decided on Jisung. Minho was too much of an older brother to him and he needed his partner in crime right now, who wouldn't worry too much about his health but listen and act instead.
Twin
Sungie? I need you to do
something for me please
Do I need a shovel?
What? No! You need to go to
the pharmacy for me
What do you need?
Are you sick?
Not really...
???
I need a pregnancy test
YOU THINK YOU ARE
PREGNANT??!!
I don't only think so, I know it,
doctor told me but I want to
tell Chan and Jin with a gift
and it includes a positive test
Sungie?
You still there?
Sorry, processing...
Omw to the pharmacy
I love you!
Thanks!
I need alcohol after this
You can have some, just
without me
Holy fuck. You are having
a freaking baby
I'm gonna be an uncle!
So much pressure, ugh
Yeah, the uncle role is
really pressuring.
Let me panic properly!
Got the test, should I
ring at yours?
No, just throw it into the
mailbox, I'll get it later
Thanks! Really!
Tell me how it went!
<3
Hyunjin and Chan were still occupied in the kitchen so if Felix was quiet enough, he could get the test real quick and take it. Tomorrow he would buy baby shoes and then finally tell his boyfriends.
On his toes, Felix sneaked through the hallway and past the kitchen to the front door. He grabbed the key from the board next to the door and cursed when the lock made a squeaking sound while he turned the key. He stopped for a few seconds but no steps were coming in his direction, so he opened the box and took out the little plastic bag.
He quickly ran back to the bathroom, again passing the kitchen in which Chan was humming a melody while cooking something on the stove. It took a second before the smell reached Felix's nose but suddenly he felt sick and sped up, reaching the toilet just in time to throw up the water he had drunk this morning.
"Ugh", Felix made when he finally stopped gagging. His throat was feeling scratching and he was short of breath, at least he was in the bathroom and nobody had followed him.
Felix got up, drinking some water from the sink and then picking up the plastic bag that he had thrown on the ground in panic. The package was wrapped in plastic and Felix would complain about the pollution but he couldn't think straight at the moment. He briefly looked over the instructions: pee on the stick, then wait. Great, he could do that.
When he was done, he washed his hands and started a three-minute timer on his phone, the test lying face down on the edge of the sink.
While the seconds were passing agonizing slow, Felix thought about where to get baby shoes from especially without his boyfriends finding out. He guessed that they wouldn't let him out of their sight for more than a few minutes from now on, much less let him go to the store alone.
Maybe he would have to ask Jisung again, and then give him enough money so Jisung could buy himself a big bottle of wine or better, vodka.
The beeping of his phone startled him out of his thoughts and he scrambled to turn the timer off. His eyes fell on the white stick, and even though he knew that the digital screen would show the word 'pregnant', Felix could feel his heart beating heavily in his chest.
"Now or never", he mumbled and turned the test around. Pregnant. He took a breath... wow. There it was, the evidence that he was carrying a child, Felix felt a bit overwhelmed.
"Felix?", Hyunjin asked, knocking on the door. "Are you in there?", "Yes! I'll be out in a minute!", Felix answered, hastily putting the test in the bag of his sweater and throwing the package into the trash can, wrapped in the plastic bag, so nobody would notice it.
He opened the door, Hyunjin greeting him with a smile. "Are you feeling better?", "Hmm", Felix hummed, "But I'm hungry", he admitted. "Great, we cooked, come on", Hyunjin pressed a kiss to his cheek and pulled Felix to the dining room, helping him to sit down at the table.
"You don't need to pull the chair for me, you know?", Felix said, amused. "But we like to pamper you", Chan replied, placing a pot in the middle of the table. "You are getting the biggest plate we own", he told Felix, who smiled in return.
He could think about baby shoes and gift boxes filled with cotton and glitter tomorrow.
It turned out that finding baby shoes was easier than expected. Felix had thought he would have to find a shoe store but he found a pair in a drug market, cheap and probably not good for real babies but enough for what he had planned.
Hyunjin and Chan went to work and he had promised them he wouldn't leave the apartment except to get food and that's what he was doing right now, getting food... along with other things. 'Other things' being a gift box, confetti, a ribbon and the baby shoes.
The woman at the checkout smiled at him when she scanned the objects and whispered a small "congrats", when Felix paid.
With his purchases he quickly made his way back home, he only had an hour till Chan and Hyunjin would be back and he had to get the gift ready.
He decided to do it in the living room, placing the box on the coffee table and filling it with the confetti and then putting in the test and shoes. He topped it with the ribbon, making a little bow on the top. Now he just had to wait for his boyfriends to come back.
With every minute, Felix grew more and more impatient, his heart beating in his chest, making him a little dizzy. At exactly 2:07 PM, the front door opened and he could hear Chan and Hyunjin taking off their shoes and jackets.
"Hey baby, how are you?", Chan asked, when he saw Felix nervously standing in the living room. "Good, great even, how was your day til now?", he replied. "It was okay, I hope I can clear my head during lunch break with you guys, producing will be easier then", Chan told him.
"The new customer is a pain in the ass but he pays well so I'll have to bear with him", Hyunjin shrugged. "How was your morning? Did you go out shopping? Did you eat?", he proceeded to ask Felix. "Good, yes and yes, but I also got you guys something", Felix answered, gesturing to the coffee table.
"Oh? A gift?", Chan asked. "Hmmm, but you have to open it together", Felix explained. Hyunjin and Chan sat down on the couch, Felix on the other side of the coffee table so he could see their reactions.
"Can you give us a tip on what this is?", Chan asked. "Uhm, I hope it will make your day better", Felix laughed sheepishly.
Hyunjin carefully pulled at the bow to open the ribbon and Chan took off the box's lid. Felix held his breath and bit his lip when his boyfriends looked into the box, Hyunjin taking out the test. He stared at it for a few seconds, Chan looking over his shoulder and then both of them looked up.
"Is this real? Are you...", Felix nodded. "Oh my god... oh my god!", both of them got up, rounding the table and trapping Felix in a hug. "You are pregnant? Like for real?", Hyunjin asked again. "Yes, I am", Felix whispered back, a little overwhelmed.
"I can't believe it. That's why you fainted, right? Wait, are you okay? Is something wrong?", Chan stumbled over his words. "No, no, everything's fine. It's common that your blood pressure is low during pregnancy, the doctor told me we are good", Felix explained.
"Wait, since when do you know you are pregnant?", Hyunjin wanted to know. "Yesterday, they told me in the hospital, but I wanted to do something special, so I took a test and made the gift box", Felix told them.
"It was perfect. Whoa, you were right, this made my day a lot better", Chan kissed his cheek. "How far along are you?", Hyunjin asked. "Nine weeks", "So far already, the baby is gonna be born soon!", Chan gasped. Felix chuckled.
"Let's sit down, you still need rest", Chan decided after two more minutes of hugging. "We should eat, you guys have to leave in half an hour", Felix reminded them.
"Oh please, you are crazy if you think we are leaving after hearing those news, we have an afternoon of baby talk and cuddling before us", Hyunjin said. "Absolutely right. But we are eating anyway, Felix needs those nutrients", Chan added.
"I love you", "We love you too, both of you"