Chapter Text
The ground shakes as thick bush hedges surround Roxanne Ritchi on all sides, rapidly gliding up from the grass with the help of Megamind’s latest invention. Widening her stance for stability in her blue work heels, her eyes dart around as all open ground is quickly swallowed up.
Rows and rows of more hedges rise. There are openings, she notices, sporadically in the appearing bushes.
It’s a maze.
A few startled yells from citizens trill over the hedges, people scrambling in their Spring Fair attire. The rumbling underfoot stops and she straightens up, looking to the sky as a few Brainbots fly overhead.
What is the city’s resident supervillain up to now?
Roxanne wastes no time and marches off through the maze, heels sinking into the grass with every step. Her eyes are glued on one of the Brainbots, trying to meander through the bushes to follow him. 501, she’s fairly certain. The group leaders each have a series of small dots on their bellies, and this one is like a W.
Maybe he’d lead her to Megamind.
It was fortunate that Roxanne was near the middle of the Spring Fair when Megamind’s maze sprung up. If she would have been near the edge, she’s sure Minion would have snatched her and tied her up already. And this would thoroughly prevent her from any good snooping into Megamind’s inventions or into the blue alien himself.
Looking to the sky, she uses her peripheries to not run into other people while following 501.
Rounding a bush corner, she pauses briefly as she spots a different Brainbot leading a child by the hand. She watches for a few seconds to see the Brainbot deliver the child to his mother. They must have gotten separated while the maze was going up. Huh.
She shakes her head at the conundrum she doesn’t have time for and presses on. Down a long, narrow path, left at a fork, and THERE!
She dives back behind the corner she just turned as Megamind’s glossy black cape swishes behind him.
He’s striding about 10 feet away from her, back to her, giving directions to a Brainbot then rapidly tapping over a device strapped to his forearm. Not for the first time, Roxanne feels a tiny swoop in her tummy at the twinkling wave of his leather-clad fingers expertly punching in commands in a device. He has hundreds of inventions, and most she sees him operate without even looking.
And, that swoop in her tummy is… impressed. Yup. Impressed at his brilliant nerdiness. Not at all anything else.
Finally, he turns a corner and she hastens after him. She slows to peek around the corner and almost gasps, biting her tongue at the last second and popping her head back behind the bush.
He’s right there! She saw him! A VERY brief glance at his blue profile. Just a couple of feet away!
Of course, she’s seen Megamind before, but never up close. He’s kidnapped her 38 times over the past two years, but Megamind seems to make a point to never get too close. Addressing her from across the room, or in the shadows, or behind her. (Which was not at all distracting. She shivered those times because it was cold on top of that roof!) Minion does most of the handling…
Whenever Megamind did come near her, the kidnapping bag was on. Even in news reports, the cameras never got a very clear image of his face. It was usually blurry from trying to zoom in that far.
Biting her lip, Roxanne is overcome with the urge to finally get a good look at her alien---the city’s alien supervillain. Yes. She just wants to see. Teasing her cold fingers into the branches of the bush, pushing apart leaves until she could see the blue skin on the other side.
Oh, his ears are pointed slightly on the ends. She guessed they were, when sifting through the hundreds of videos and pictures she’s found of him over the past year.
“You haven’t found her yet?” his familiar voice rang, and the thrill of recognition that he was likely talking about her.
“Minion. Minion, this is no time to panic. She’s very resourceful, I’m sure she— well— even if she did get stuck, I’m certain she’d figure out how to untangle herself.”
His face turned and his ear went out of sight. She quietly extracted herself from her hiding place and moved to creep around the corner.
“Have the Brainbots do another sweep of the southern region. Near the fountains.”
Roxanne really should not be smiling to herself this much. So what, he’s looking for her? She was looking for him too. It doesn’t mean anything.
But having his voice this close is intoxicating and she can’t stop herself from following as closely as possible behind him to keep hearing it.
Megamind’s cape flutters behind him as he strides purposely through the maze, like he knows exactly which turns to take to reach his destination. She has to move quickly to keep up, carefully stopping at the edge of each corner to peek around, waiting for him to make the next turn.
She just wants to hear what other directions he’s giving… for snooping purposes.
“Uuuuhg, Roxanne,” he groans exacerbated, and she does gasp then, flattening herself against a leafy wedge.
Her name. He never says her first name. In all of their across the room banter, in all of their under the kidnapping bag talking and laughing, with all of the questions he only ever indirectly answers for her… he never calls her Roxanne. Only Miss Ritchi.
And they talk quite a lot during every single kidnapping. She can’t help it. She barrages him with comments, questions, distracting jokes sometimes. And he always has a reply on the tip of his tongue waiting for her. As if he looks forward to their banter as much as she does. Megamind loves to talk. And she loves to make him talk.
It wasn't until her 10th kidnapping that she realized he was actually teasing her. That should, Ah-hem, not turn her on.
But now she’s trapped against the edge of this hedge, spine tense, breath shaky from trying to breathe without sound. She listens.
Nothing.
Cautiously, she turns the corner then scoffs. He’s gone! Dangit!
She half-trots around the corner, cursing her heel as it gets stuck in the grass again, but then Megamind walks by right in front of her in the fork of the maze.
There’s a determined scowl on his face as he looks resolutely at something in front of him.
His face.
“Wow, you’re cute,” she blurts. It’s the first thing that comes to her mouth.
He keeps walking on as if she hasn't spoken at all.
“Strikingly so,” she adds with more purpose in her tone to get his attention.
Megamind slows his gate, glancing back to see her looking right at him. She's struck anew as his green eyes switch from confusion that someone addressed him that way, then shock that it was her.
Megamind is sharp angles, and bright eyes, and periwinkle blue in the evening sunlight. Her eyes greedily rake over his face in the few seconds before he turns and speedwalks away from her.
“Hey!” she calls, tracking after him. Trying to match his speed, but he has long legs and these darn heels!
“Megamind, would you--”
He avoids her, changing directions suddenly and she stumbles in the grass to pursue.
“I know you can hear me,” she smiles to herself as she chases his blue head through the maze. This is, sort of fun! This reversal where she’s chasing down a supervillain. (Not that she’s ever run from him…)
“Why are you chasing me?” he calls over his shoulder.
“Why are you running?”
“I'm not running! I'm strategically moving away.”
She huffs, reaching toward his billowing cape that quickly whips out of her reach.
“Look, I'm not that scary,” she tries.
He moves into an open circle of hedge around a fountain near the edge of the park. He makes it to the other side of the fountain and she places her hands on the edge of cold concrete, grinning at him. His eyes widen.
“Maybe I just want to talk to you.”
“Maybe I just don't want to answer your questions.” He mirrors her body, placing his hands on the other side of the fountain edge.
Eyes locked over the five feet of splashing water between them, she slowly walks around the edge, dragging her fingertips behind her on the concrete. He mirrors her on the other side, keeping the fountain the same distance between them.
"Always so secretive. I thought you'd steal a camera and broadcast yourself ages ago..."
Her grin falters slightly. “I’m going to start taking offense.” He lifts a quizzing black eyebrow at her and she answers. “You keeping your distance from me like this.”
“You want me to get closer to you?” he guffaws.
“You constantly tie me up on the other side of the room as you. You never talk to me alone, always with Minion in the room. You hardly talk to me-”
“I talk to you!” he blurts, losing his tempo to keep the same distance. He realizes his mistake as she takes three steps closer to him. He backed up suddenly, placing a bench between them as well.
Annoyance starts creeping in the more he tries to get away from her. What's the deal?
“But you’re always guarded. This is the first time you’ve even deemed me good enough to see your face. Am I really that unpleasant to be around?”
“Maybe I'm just not comfortable around reporters.” His eyes widen as he backs up further, glancing to the circle exit to his left and behind him.
“Not buying it.” His eyes snap back to hers, brows furrowed as she walks around the bench. “It’s me, isn’t it? You don’t even kidnap anyone else.”
“Didn’t know you were paying such close attention to me,” he gruffed, slipping through a maze arch.
She follows.
“So what is it? Tell me, Megamind.”
He scoffs, frowning as he keeps moving, keeping 8-10 feet between them.
“Coward. You don’t have to spare my feelings,” she snapped and he rounded on her then. Both of them scowling, standing with defensive posture. “Am I annoying? Pushy?”
He kept his distance, his precious 8 feet that he so desperately needs from her.
“What is it about me that just drives you wild, huh?”
“Everything!” he snaps, and she startles at his harsh tone. His face is wrinkled in tension and she blinks at him too many times.
“Oh,” she finally says softly.
She hadn’t actually expected that. To be so annoying of a reporter that he literally hated everything about her. Shame burns in her cheeks as she clears her throat, taking a step back.
“Well, then.” She wraps her arms around herself defensively, refusing to look him in the eye again.
Then without another word, she turns and marches off. Stupid stupid tears burn in the back of her eye and she wipes at them furiously.
Who cares? She knows she’s annoying. She knows she talks too much. Her mother told her. Her friends told her. Her boss told her. Who cares?
Roxanne turned in the maze, stomped six paces and turned again. And again.
Megamind is just one more person. One more who she now has to tiptoe around, right?
Can’t just relax and be herself, but actually has to pay close attention to every word out of her mouth. Can’t say too much. Can’t ramble on about a topic you’re actually passionate about.
Eyes glued to the grass in front of her, she marches on. Frowning at herself. Ignoring the chilled bite in her ears.
So what if she actually liked talking to him? Felt like he wouldn’t judge her. He probably hated it when she rambled on about the book she was reading. Even if he did also read that book and argue teasingly with her that her romantic perspectives were naive for the harsh world of carnivorous mermaids.
Roxanne sighs, reprimanding herself, then looks up. And realizes her temper tantrum has taken her quite far away in the maze. She’s… really not sure where she is now.
She groans, looking up to try to spot a Brainbot in the sky, maybe to wave it down. They never seemed particularly dangerous. But no. The only thing she sees is gray clouds.
She could probably yell for help from the outside, but her pride won’t let her. So Roxanne walks on, unfolding her arms, then immediately folding them again to brace against a cold breeze. She looks to the sky again, it’s getting a little darker and darker by the minute. Shoot.
Can’t Megamind wrap this up already? And where the heck is Metro Man? Does he not know? Did no one call him?
She tries to retrace her steps, then immediately faces a hedge wall that she was sure wasn’t there before. Fine. She turns around and continues, right, right, no- why? Why is this wall here now? She scowls, annoyed at herself for misremembering. She grumbles on, only to be faced with dead end after dead end.
How is this possible? She got in here somehow.
In the corner of her eye, a new hedge wall sprung up, closing off the maze section to her left.
“Uuuug!” she yelled to the gray clouds. A changing maze?? Has it always been changing??
But no. Another wall came up. Then another. Directly around her.
The maze was cornering her into a smaller and smaller box. She saw that now. And she ran towards any shadowy corner that might still be an opening. Could she climb over? Not without getting scrapes all over her bare legs, but what’s worse? Bloody calves or getting kidnapped by a man who admittedly despises you?
Suddenly, Megamind's blue face wearing a vicious smile pops out from the only opening left in her box and he strolls arrogantly toward her. Blindly tapping at his wrist to close the gap behind him.
“Miss Ritchi,” his low voice rumbled. “You've fallen right into my trap.”
No, no, shut up labido. Who cares if his voice is like warm honey down your chest? He thinks you’re annoying. He hates you.
She snarls at him as he steps closer and closer to her until she’s cornered into a wedge of bush. Brilliant.
She shows no fear at being this close to his smug face, pushing her shoulders back.
“Why would you want to trap me? Am I that tempting to kidnap?” she mocks.
“Tempting?”
Ok. She's actually trapped with a supervillain, now what?
“Maybe I just want to talk to you,” he parrots.
Luminous green eyes getting closer, she steps back until she feels bush digging into her spine.
She lifts her chin defiantly. “Ah, ah, ah that's poor manners. I asked first.”
She should at least continue with her plan. Try to get good answers from him.
She looks at his face, his blue blue face that she so desperately wished to see clearly for months. Her heartbeat races under her skin.
It’s not fair, how striking his features are. How handsome he is. It’s distracting. And she simply can’t allow that.
“You don’t even look scared,” he mumbles, possibly more to himself. Blinking long lashes down at her.
She rolls her eyes, mostly to remind herself to be too annoyed to be aroused. “Let's make a deal, a question for a question.”
His feet stopped just in front of her. Like he’s challenging her to actually be afraid of him.
He’s so, so close. She can’t hardly believe it. Has ANYONE ever been this close to him? Why is he so close? To distract her? Did he… does he know? Can he tell how attracted she is to him? Which is- come on, Roxanne. You can’t be attracted to a supervillain. That’s, that’s absolutely not allowed.
Megamind is hovering over her, closer, closer.. And oh my gosh he has a philtrum. A delicious little dip between his nose and lips. And WHY IS SHE LOOKING AT HIS LIPS???
An intrusive image pops into her brain of smirking blue lips pressing urgently against hers and her moaning into his mouth.
“Scream,” he demands, voice rough.
She wonders vaguely if he can smell the caramel hot chocolate on her breath. She swallows, “That's not a question, that's a request. And no.”
She can do this. Stay focused.
She lifts her chin uncomfortably high, arching her neck, and his eyes catch on it.
“Temptress,” he growls and lightning tickles through her core.
Roxanne tumbles backward on her heel, one arm bracing painfully against the sharp hedge.
But her other arm is caught, pulling her back to her feet. Her elbow is wrapped around by long leather-clad fingers that can dance over control panels without looking.
Her breath catches at the contact and he yanks his hand away like she was fire. Her mouth gapes as he takes a few steps back.
He mumbles a rough, “Sorry. I- I apologize, Miss Ritchi,” then quickly puts much more space between them before snapping his wrist to his face, mumbling orders to a Brainbot on the other side.
She spots a lavender hue tinging the tops of his amazing pointed ears just before he disappears completely from her for the night.