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Miko wasn’t sure how far she had run, but it wasn’t far enough. The burn in the back of her throat and ache in her lungs wasn’t enough to accept penance for what she had done.
For what she had almost allowed herself to do.
No, she had to keep going.
Nobody could see her like this.
“Guuji Yae, are you… feeling alright?”
The concern was simple, earnest -- much like its owner. But Kujou Sara didn’t leave it at that, the simpleton . Of course, she had to care, she had to reach out. She…
When Miko stopped being able to recognize her surroundings, she slowed down enough to stumble to a stop, mossy earth at her feet-- no, paws.
Miko had spent years, endless, lonely years, soothing the unrest of Inazuman patrons; countless faces had entered the Grand Narukami Shrine seeking salvation, peace, or answers, and Miko’s job was to convince them they would find what they sought. She was a beacon of hope, a life raft in the sea of turmoil, selflessly casting herself out at sea to gather and soothe as many lost souls as she could accumulate.
She huffed a humourless laugh. One child, sick and hardly able to stand, had the gall to tell her she was a savior. It was as if the child was mocking her -- like the child knew what would become of her.
But as Miko sat against the unforgiving bark of a tree that scratched her fur, she couldn’t believe she was anything so lucky. She couldn’t turn back and face them -- what sort of savior could she truly be if she was content to abandon those that turned to her for hope like a weary quartermaster would look towards the beam of a lighthouse.
Who could she truly save when she couldn’t even save herself?
She knew Ei wasn’t truly done with her self-immolative meditation -- who would look after the people if their god had abandoned them once more? Had abandoned Miko once more?
Many nights over the course of many years saw the same question plague bittersweet ruminations: Who would save her?
The frightened, wide-eyed pup that used to ride upon the shoulders of matured yokai - they had taught her much about the world and of her ancestry, and helped her find her wits. They saved her then, but who would save her now?
She knew the answer as it burned into her gut, a furious reminder of why getting close to others was always foolish.
Solitude had felt these days more akin to a curse than a humble period of reflection; although she hated to admit it, she often felt so hopelessly lost . Her compatriots had left her too soon, leaving her with no one to illuminate her darkened mind; the thought screamed itself in her mind, the pain pricking at her eyes as she picked out burrs that wedged into the skin of her hind leg.
Miko would have wiped at her eyes if she were in her humanoid form; she still could not shapeshift at will, and the heat of the situation ripped a bitter growl from her throat. It was that General’s fault, she knew.
She stood up on all fours, fury melting away the pain and guilt that threatened to devour her; the rage of a cloud of deep purple engulfed her form, power surging through her as electricity crackled around her.
If Kujou Sara, of all people, had the wherewithal to mind her own damn business, Miko wouldn’t have been stuck in this mess. If Kujou Sara hadn't followed her and asked if she was alright…
An unnaturally low-pitched growl sounded, vibrating deeply through the ground; its vessel seemingly pulling energy from the forest itself, darkening the hues of the grass and the trees as the deep purple glow pulsed brighter.
If Kujou Sara hadn’t reached out and grabbed her hand, with a horribly tender touch…
If Kujou Sara hadn’t stepped in front of her and offered a heartwrenching gaze of stalwart concern …
The squeeze of a calloused hand, gentle and reassuring…
The searching gaze of owlish eyes, wide with kindness…
The soft, yet deep timbre of her lowered voice, careful to keep their conversation private…
Idiot, idiot, idiot! As she nearly felt the General’s pity through her memories all over again, Miko gnashed her teeth, eyes flaring bright pink with pure electro energy.
A distorted, otherworldly scream ripped itself from Miko’s throat. Wild, bright pink electricity discharged in all directions as the scream distorted with each reverberation, shaking the trees with the force of 600 years of gnawing emptiness.
Miko’s furred chest heaving from exertion, adrenaline staving off the exhaustion she was sure to feel otherwise. A similarly otherworldly sound -- akin to a demonic squawk -- had her jolt; with long pink ears peeled back, she braced as she met her new intruder.
“Sara? ”
As her stoic General landed, several inky black feathers fluttered to the ground with her. Miko’s vision was simultaneously blurred from grief, yet sharpened from heightened yokai senses, and she couldn’t believe what was in front of her: Sara’s true tengu form.
Covered in feathers, Sara’s humanoid form meshed with the unknown, with claws instead of fingers, and a red feathered face instead of her familiar mask. Seeing Sara’s form was beautiful as much as humans would find it terrifying.
For several moments, they stared at each other in silence; Miko’s heart thrummed in her ears as quick as her mind raced, and it took everything to keep the floodgates from opening.
“How ?” Miko croaked.
“You should know that you’re not the only one who deals with such… changes, Guuji.”
Sara’s voice sounded so powerful, it was deeper, it had a mysterious resonance to it that, when she spoke, the forest quieted to listen. A commanding presence, fitting for that of the Shogun’s General.
She knelt in front of Miko, arms outstretched in offer. “You do not have to deal with this alone,” she said, her booming tone warding off any dangers that could threaten them.
But Miko didn’t feel safe, nor protected. Sara’s impressive physique and frightening yokai abilities could not stand up against the bitter feelings of shame entrenched in Miko’s heart.
“Perhaps I am meant to be alone.”
As soon as she said it, the shame flared. Sensing the inner conflict, Sara inched forward and slowly wrapped her feathered arms around Miko’s furred neck.
“Perhaps,” Miko started again, wanting to run so far and so fast so nobody could ever see Inazuma’s most powerful yokai at her weakest. “Perhaps I deserve to face this alone.”
Sara shook her head, although Miko couldn’t see it. “I do not believe that. Do you?”
Miko bared her fangs, an unconscious response to the unseen threat. She didn’t feel Sara’s hug tighten ever so slightly. She didn’t feel how she leaned into the touch.
“Why are you here?” Miko asked, countering Sara’s question with her own. “Don’t you know how dangerous I am?”
Sara said nothing.
“Don’t you know I will hurt you?”
Sara said nothing. Miko growled.
“Can’t you get it through your… your thick skull that I’m going to abandon you ?!” Miko yelled, ripping herself from Sara’s arms and staring wide-eyed at her. Fangs still bared,highlighting the desperation within her barbed promise, Miko wanted-- needed -- Sara to fight back.
Sara, however, did not flinch.
“Why won’t you say anything?! ” Miko cried. “Why would you follow me all this way a-and have the gall to not even fucking explain yourself?!”
K-KRAK
A devastating pink flash blinded them temporarily - the ensuing clap of thunder left Miko’s ears ringing. When her eyes re-adjusted, she gasped.
“Sara, I--!”
The grass surrounding her frightening tengu was blackened; any hint of flora or branches reduced to ash at Sara’s clawed feet. Outstretched was a feathered arm, encircled with pulsing light pink ripples of electro - golden eyes glowed with power, their gaze fixed on Miko.
Miko watched as Sara flung her arm to the side, sending the pulsating wave of electricity crashing into a cluster of trees, incinerating them on the spot. Aftershocks from the blast vibrated underneath Miko’s paws.
“Come home, Miko,” Sara said. She had walked forward without hesitation and placed a soft, feathered hand on top of Miko’s head. “Let’s go home.”
She waited for a response. Feeling her energy, her rage , her sorrow depleted, Miko started to fall.
But the ground never came.
It was only when Miko felt strong arms holding her up that she realized she had returned to her humanoid form. Her eyes felt heavy, her mind felt blanketed and foggy. She looked up and saw the comfort of Sara’s stalwart concern staring back at her - she had also changed back.
“Sara,” Miko whispered, trying to gather the strength to pull herself back onto her feet, her hands weakly tugging at Sara’s regalia in vain.
In one motion, Sara gingerly lifted Miko into her arms and started to carry her. The steady thrum of Sara’s heartbeat along with the even rocking motions of Sara’s footsteps were a comfort Miko wouldn’t have dared ask for, but never wanted to let go.
As the fatigue of her transformation started to get the best of her, she heard a soft promise that laid her troubled heart at ease:
“Don’t worry, Guuji Yae. I’m here.”
“Yes,” Miko whispered in response, huddling closer to the warmth. “Maybe that’s best.”