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"Buck, you saved two lives without the uniform. It's not a costume, it's who you are."
The Moment those words left Bobby's mouth, Buck felt the bitter taste of bile in his throat and literally wanted to strangle the man. His eyes narrowed dangerously, not that Bobby noticed as he continued talking.
"It doesn't matter if I'm ready for you to come back. You are. It's time for me to get out of your way."
A bitter laugh that he couldn't keep back left Buck's mouth.
"So you think I'm ready because I saved two people?" he asked, his voice void of emotion. He just wasn't sure what to feel, so he turned them all at least down as he had learned at the academy and the SEALs before that, even if he wasn't able to turn them off.
"Well, it's not every day that we save people while out of uniform," Bobby replied, oblivious to the turmoil raging inside Buck.
"So the bar for me to come back, for you to see that I'm ready to come back was to save someone out of uniform? That's fucking rich, Captain Nash," Buck replied, his voice cold. Bobby flinched at the use of his name and title instead of his first name and looked at Buck for the first time since the conversation started. He didn't like what he saw as Buck's face was just as cold as his voice. "I'd like to request a transfer, as I'm done with you and your double standards."
Bobby stared at Buck uncomprehendingly. He had no idea what the younger man was talking about. Which double standards? And why a transfer? Buck should be happy that Bobby was finally letting him back on the rig.
"What do you mean?" he asked, bewildered. "What double standards?"
"First of all, that, as my lawyer, slimy bastard that he was, pointed out, no one else had to do anything like that. As much as he was an asshole that abused my trust, much like you have by the way, he was right about that. Also, that was the... I have honestly lost count of which number of goals it was, not that you informed me of even half of them and you constantly moved them to suit you," Buck answered, his voice still flat in a way Bobby had never heard before. "And if I really needed to save someone off duty to be fine enough to return in your eyes, then I have no fucking clue why two people in the street with help coming in a matter of minutes was that much more significant than the three dozen people I pulled on top of the 136's engine or the twenty other people I helped while searching for Christopher after I lost him. But I guess, all those people don't count, do they? Because then the goalpost was still that I needed to be off blood thinners or because I lost Chris because I needed to play hero."
Buck scoffed and turned.
"You'll have my transfer paperwork on your desk by the next shift. Have a good life, Captain Nash. While I hope to never see you again, I know that won't be possible if I stay part of the LAFD."
And with that, he left, leaving behind a speechless Bobby Nash who knew without a doubt that he had just lost his son for good through his actions.
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Buck sighed as he sat in his Jeep in front of Eddie's house. He had regretted his words to Bobby the moment he left the hospital. Not because they were untrue and not because he didn't mean them as he was sick and tired of Bobby's abuse of power, but because with them he had broken his promise to Eddie not to do impulsive shit again without talking to him first.
This would probably be the straw that broke the camel's back and he would lose Eddie and Chris on top of the rest of the 118.
He was so deep in thought that he didn't notice Eddie opening the front door, leaning in it for a good five minutes, and then finally making his way to Buck's car when it didn't seem as if the younger man would come out of his funk any time soon. Eddie knocked on the driver's window, startling his friend, who looked at him with wide eyes.
Eddie frowned, worried about the look on Buck's face that told him that something was very wrong. Buck looked like a kid with his hand in the cookie jar. Eddie looked to the door for a moment to check that Chris wasn't there, but could see them should he wake, before he moved around the Jeep and slid into the passenger's seat.
"What's wrong?" he asked. "What happened?"
Buck sighed again and rested his hands on the steering wheel, his shirt riding up to reveal the bandages on his arm.
"Fuck, Buck, what happened?" Eddie exclaimed, gently extracting the arm from the steering wheel to be able to look at the bandages. "You were fine when you left work last night!"
"There was this woman at the gas station where I wanted to get some pity ice cream because Bobby was still not letting me come back for real. She had this massive goose egg on her head and there was a man stuck in her windshield," Buck started to explain.
"And of course, you had to help," Eddie nodded, knowing that that was just who his best friend was. "Did you get checked out at least? Or did you do this by yourself?"
"Of course, I got checked out!" Buck exclaimed indignantly. "I even went to the hospital of my own free will. Just some shallow cuts because of the glass. Nothing to worry about too much."
"I'm glad," Eddie replied. "And I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry. I know you're much more careful right now with everything."
Buck looked away, taking a deep breath. He was glad that Eddie understood and wasn't blaming him for helping and getting hurt.
"Something else happened, didn't it?" Eddie asked when the silence between them stretched on. "Can you tell me what it is?"
"They called Bobby," Buck replied tonelessly. "I don't even know why, I was lucid and didn't even need stitches, so they really shouldn't have called him. Also, he's no longer my medical proxy so I really have no idea why they did or if it was the hospital at all."
Buck fell silent again, not wanting to tell Eddie the rest. As long as he didn't he would still have their friendship that meant so much to him. Once the words left his mouth, however, he would lose Eddie for good. He was sure of it.
"And Bobby probably blamed you for rushing in first and not thinking about yourself?" Eddie asked perceptively. Buck just nodded.
"He said that me getting hurt was my fault, just not in so many words."
"That's bullshit," Eddie exclaimed, causing Buck to look at him wide-eyed. "It's not your fault you got hurt helping. Things like that happen and it would not have happened had you still been on duty, because then, you would have been wearing protective clothing. Also, had you still been on duty instead of his bullshit letting you go early, you would not have been there to get hurt in the first place."
"Well, I guess seeing me hurt again changed something in him, as he told me that because I saved two people without the uniform, he was finally ready to let me come back," Buck scoffed and Eddie stared at him wide-eyed.
"Excuse me?" the older man asked. "But what a load of fucking bullshit! What about the fifty people you saved or helped during the tsunami? I hope you told him all about himself!"
Buck had shrunken back from Eddie's outburst at first but by now he was staring at the older man dumbfounded. He had no idea what was going on. He had thought that Eddie would be mad at him like Bobby was but the older man was not reacting at all how he had expected.
"That's it," Eddie went on in his rant. "We're changing stations. I'm done with Nash's double standards and constantly moving goalposts for you. This is it! No more!"
Buck stared at him wide-eyed, not sure what to say or how to react. This was so unlike Eddie that he had no frame of reference in what to think.
"You would change stations with me?" he asked, his voice small.
Eddie looked at Buck and saw the forlorn look in his eyes. He grasped the other man's hand and squeezed it lightly.
"Of course, cariño," Eddie replied. "I've been trying to get you to change stations with me for months!"
"You have?" Buck inquired, before thinking back over the last weeks and months, and yeah, now that he looked at things this way, Eddie had tried to get him to change stations. Only Buck had been too stubborn to see it, not wanting to give up on the 118. "You have! But where would we go?"
"Well, your friend Tommy said he'd take us in a heartbeat and Ronnie Cooper from the 136 would take us as well. They're both still looking for heavy rescue pairs for different reasons," Eddie replied, making Buck's face light up in hope.
"Alright, let's do this then. I already told Bobby that I was done with him and the 118. Sorry about that and about not talking to you about it by the way."
Buck let his head hang, waiting for the scolding he was sure would come despite Eddie's unusual reactions so far.
"Good for you!" Eddie replied, however, instead of scolding him. "As I said before, I've been trying to get you to change stations with me for months. I just couldn't stand how toxic that station is for you anymore. And I know that we promised each other to talk about shit first, but this was long overdue and I've been waiting for you to come to this point. I'm sorry that it's because you got hurt again, but I'm glad you finally did."
"I'm glad, too. Thank you for being there for me."
"Any time, Buck, I promised to have your back last year and I plan to keep that promise from now on."
"And I'll have yours."