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“What’s up, bitches?” Childe greets, casually strolling into the warehouse as if he wasn’t 30 minutes late.
“Language.” Dottore reprimands.
“Shut the fuck up!” Scaramouche yells from inside the truck on the other side of the large room.
“Stop bickering like children and hurry up, we need to get going.” Signora sighs, fingers pinching the bridge of her nose. “The truck is already packed, let's go.”
The three join their coworker in the truck, Dottore sitting in the driver's seat while the other three squeeze into the passenger seats, and set off for tonight's job.
“So where are we going tonight?” Childe questions.
“You’d know that if you showed up on time.” Scara taunts.
“13 Willow Street.” Signora answers, ignoring the glare Scara sends her.
“That old place? That’s been abandoned longer than I’ve been alive. No ones been inside since it was boarded up all those years ago, how’d we get access?” Childe sits up, eyes shining in excitement.
“Our boss has been working hard to get permission for years and finally got it approved earlier this week.” Signora smiles at the thought of Tsaritsa.
“How did I not hear about this till now?!” Childe gasps, making sure to bump Scara in his dramatics.
“Because you have the brain of a goldfish.” Scara scoffs, shoving Childe out of his space.
“Now now Scara.” Signora tsks and Childe sticks his tongue out at the angry man. “That’s rude to goldfish.”
“Hey!” Childe exclaims as Scara copies the tongue he stuck out before, laughing at his misery.
“We’re here.” Dottore announces as the truck slows to a halt.
The three exit the truck quickly, ignoring Childe’s complaint. Dottore unlocks the back of the truck and enters as the ginger runs to catch up.
“Wait for me!” Childe pants, taking a moment to catch his breath.
“Don’t be so slow then.” Scara rolls his eyes before turning away to gather his equipment. “I have the UV Flashlight and Ghost Writing Book.”
“I have the EMF Reader and D.O.T.S. Projector.” Signora chimes in.
“I have a Photo Camera and a Video Camera.” Dottore announces.
“I have a Thermometer and Spirit Box!” Childe triumphantly holds his equipment above his head.
“Don’t forget your Strong Flashlight and Head Mounted Camera.” Dottore reminds him, the other three having already grabbed their own.
“Oh right. Thanks! I’d lose my head if it wasn’t attached to my body.” Childe laughs as he grabs the missing items. “Ready!”
“Wait.” Scara flicks Childe’s forehead. “You didn’t even read the info.”
“His name is Zhongli and he responds to people who are alone.” Childe reads aloud.
“And the breaker is in the garage.” Dottore adds.
“Let's go then, boys.” Signora exits the truck and the three men follow her.
A sense of foreboding falls over them as the Ghost Hunters approach the abandoned building. Once they reach the front door, Signora pulls out a key and unlocks it. The door creaks open and a near pitch black darkness greets them. They click on their flashlights and Dottore leads the way to the garage, unaware of the piercing yellow eyes watching their every move. The blue haired man flips on the breaker while Scara hits the light switch. Old and faded bulbs light up the dusty garage. A red truck sits in the middle of the room with shelves of various tools lining the walls. Various boxes lay abandoned, some on their sides and some stacked in piles.
“Childe, what's the temperature in here…?” Signora trails off, unsurprised to see said man with an Ouija Board in hand.
“I found the cursed object!” Childe grins.
Dottore steps closer to snap a photo of the item before moving back to where he was, his camera still pointed at Childe.
The ginger eagerly sets the Ouija Board down in front of him. Signora and Scara back away, prepared to run at a moment's notice.
"Hello!" Childe greets and the planchette appears, hovering over 'hello'.
"Where are you?" Childe asks.
"Oh my god." Scara scoffs. "Of course you start with the most dangerous question."
The planchette glides across the board - 'G' 'A' 'R' 'A' 'G' 'E' - and Dottore snaps a photo of the interaction.
"Hey lucky us! The first room we enter is the one where the ghost is!" Childe laughs gleefully.
Dottore turns the light off and switches to the Video Camera, watching through the night vision mode and searching for Ghost Orbs. Signora She pulls out the D.O.T.S. Projector and places it in the ground nearby. She then turns on her EMF and it immediately reads Level 2 when aimed at the board. The woman scans the room searching for more readings. Scara sets the book down next to the board and then pulls out his UV Flashlight and begins scanning the room. The three focus on their tasks while Childe continues asking the ghost questions, oblivious to the invisible presence beside him watching on in amusement.
"How old are you?"
'2' '5'
"Hey, he's the same age as me! Twinsies!" Childe laughs.
"How did you die?"
'M' 'U' 'R' 'D' 'E' 'R'
"Ooo a mystery!" Childe laughs.
"Not in our job description." Scara barks.
"How long have you been dead?"
'2' '0' '0'
"Mmm daddy." Childe bites his lips.
The others merely roll their eyes, used to the young man's strange antics.
"How do you feel?"
'C' 'O' 'L' 'D'
"Oh I could warm you up, baby." Childe jokes, nearly jumping out of his skin when one of the miscellaneous tools falls to the ground. Signora holds the EMF over the fallen object.
"Level 2."
"I don’t see any Ghost Orbs.” Dottore informs them, putting his Video Camera away and flipping the lights back on.
“I haven’t seen any handprints yet.” Scara turns off his UV Flashlight as he walks over to check the book. “No writing either.”
“I haven’t seen any D.O.T.S. yet, but it's still a possibility just like the writing.” Signora muses. “Try asking him to interact with us.”
“I will then, let me finish having fun first.” Childe huffs at the woman before turning back to the board. "What do you want?"
'Y' 'O' 'U'
“Oh…” Childe freezes, not used to the ghosts responding in this way. Usually they hate his jokes and flirts. He snaps out of his daze, not wanting to miss out on an opportunity to flirt with a ghost. “Well you can certainly have me~”
“I swear to god if you fuck the ghost I’m going to kill you myself and torment you everyday.” Scara growls.
“I think it would be interesting.” Dottore remarks, earning a disapproving stare from the purple haired man. “It would be for science. There’s no document ever of a human and ghost partaking in intercourse together, the news could change the world.”
"Enough." Signora sighs. “You’re all going to give me a headache. Let’s get back on track.”
A shadow moves in the corner of everyone's eyes and they all turn towards the source.
"I believe we just got D.O.T.S." Dottore remarks.
Everyone watches as the shadow once again crosses the green dots projected across the room. The shadow is tall and broad and walks formally, as if this was a fancy event and not an abandoned garage. There were no discernible features of the ghost besides-
“Holy shit the ghost is caked up!” Childe exclaims, staring wide eyed at the ghost’s large butt.
The others merely facepalm as the shadow disappears instantly. They all mark down ‘D.O.T.S. Projector’ in their journals under the Evidence section.
“You better not have scared it off.” Scara sighs. “What's the temperature?”
Childe says goodbye to the Ouija Board and the planchette hovers over goodbye before disappearing. He stands up, pulling out the Thermometer and swiftly scans the room.
“The lowest is 35°F.” Childe reads off the device. “Close to Freezing Temperatures but not quite there.”
“Why don’t we try Spirit Box? Since we don’t seem to be getting any other evidence so far.” Dottore suggests, setting up his camera to face where Childe is standing. “Go ahead and flirt with your ‘boo’, I’ll be watching from the truck. The other two can wait outside the door in the next room in case of emergency.”
Dottore leaves without waiting for a response, Signora and Scara falling after, clicking off the lights and closing the door behind them.
“Proceed when ready.” Dottore radios from the truck.
Childe flips on the Spirit Box, static filling the otherwise quiet room.
“How old are you?”
“...”
“How did you die?”
“...”
“Why the hell are you asking it the same questions as before?” Scara complains over the radio.
“Because sometimes they only want to say the same things!” Childe radios back. “It’s not my fault the ghosts are never super talkative.”
“Where are you?”
Behind you .” A deep ghostly voice whispers. A cold presence presses against Childe’s back, as if someone was standing right behind him. The presence continues and settles over his shoulder and neck before pressing against his cheek.
Childe yelps and he swears he hears a deep chuckle right before the door slams open and Signora turns the lights back on.
“We got Spirit Box.” Childe scratches the back of his neck, smiling to ease the concern of his coworkers.
“Told you he was just being a scaredy cat again.” Scara rolls his eyes, turning on his UV Flashlight to scan the room. The purple light crosses every surface before landing on Childe. “What the hell?!"
Signora and Scara stare wide eyed at Childe. Said man quickly looks over his shoulder, fearing the ghost was standing right behind him like he had said. When he sees nothing he turns back around confused.
“What happened?”
“You tell us.” Dottore renters the room upon hearing the commotion from the truck. He pauses only a moment to stare at Childe before bringing out his camera, the flash blinding the man as he snaps a photo of his face.
“Why the hell did you-?” Childe covers his eyes, reeling from the pain. When his vision clears he glances at the back of the camera Dottore is holding towards him and instantly understands why everyone is staring at him.
The UV light revealed a glowing green set of lips on his cheek, meaning the cold sensation he had felt was the ghost kissing him.
“That’s new.” Is all Childe can think so say because in all their years of Ghost Hunting this has never happened before. “Does it count as Fingerprints?”
“Do those look like fingerprints?” Scara raises an eyebrow.
“Haha no.” Childe laughs, still in disbelief at what had happened. He raises a hand to feel at the spot, a strange warmth almost seems to radiate from the cold ghost residue.
“Why don’t you ask your boyfriend for Fingerprints?” Signora teases. "Or EMF Level 5 or Ghost Orbs while you’re at it? Based on what Evidence we have so far we need one of those three to narrow down what kind of ghost it is. Do be careful though with how much you run your mouth, it could be a Yokai.”
“If it was a Yokai it would’ve hunted by now, especially since Childe can never shut up.” Scara points out.
“Our average sanity was at 60% when I last checked so a Yokai is certainly within its abilities to hunt by now.” Dottore remarks. “It could be a Phantom or a Wraith so let's gather some preventive measures just in case.”
The blue haired man leaves and the rest follow him out, checking off ‘Spirit Box’ in their journals on the way. Once back in the truck they grab some Salt, another Photo Camera, two crucifixes and a smudge and lighter before heading back in.
Back in the garage, Signora sets her EMF down on the ground next to Childe, making sure the device is on before setting the smudge and lighter beside it. Dottore spreads salt across the doorway and leaves some piles around Childe. Scara sets the crucifixes down on the floor, one on each side of the room. Childe holds the UV Flashlight and Camera in hand as the others leave. Dottore watches the Activity and Sanity Levels alongside the camera in the truck while Signora and Scara wait in the next room with a smudge and lighter each in case of a hunt.
“Remember to scream if you need help.” Dottore chuckles over the radio. “Activity is currently 0.”
“Hey, Mr. Caked Up Ghost.” Childe greets the seemingly empty room. “Could you please write in my book? I’d love to get your number.”
Childe winks before realizing his mistake.
“Wait shit, ghosts don’t have phones.” He laughs. The journal gets tossed gently about a foot away from where it was placed. The EMF beeps singling Level 2.
Childe leans down to check the book, seeing no writing he crosses that out in his journal.
“No writing.” Childe radios.
“We know, dumbass.” Scara radios back. “It can’t be Ghost Writing, remember?”
“Oh yeah.” Childe laughs, too focused on flirting with the ghost to remember the evidence so far. “Okay then, could you please show my crazy coworker some ghost orbs on the camera?”
Silence answers him until Dottore radios.
“I’m not seeing any orbs and you’ve been in there for quite awhile. I believe we can rule that evidence out.”
Childe crosses ‘Ghost Orbs’ out in his journal.
“Oh and be careful, the average sanity has hit 50%. The ghost might begin hunting soon.” Dottore warns.
“Can you give me EMF, hot stuff?” Childe flirts. “Well, cold stuff would be more accurate I suppose but you get the point”
The EMF immediately starts blaring, reading Level 3.
“Thank you! If possible could you give me Level 5?” Childe questions and his flashlight begins flickering. “Oh shit.”
He quickly shuts off the flashlight and ducks down behind some boxes, a deep voice hums as the ghost slowly crosses the room towards his hiding spot. Childe eyes the EMF, the lights dance between 3 and 4 but never hits 5. The soft melody carries on for a moment more before abruptly stopping.
“Don’t worry, that was only a Ghost Event.” Dottore radios.
“A little late for that.” Childe radios back. “I almost pissed my pants.”
A deep chuckle in the only response he gets.
“The EMF only went up to 4 during the event, so it most likely isn’t EMF 5 but I’m going to keep watching it just in case.” Childe radios.
“Good idea.” Signora radios back.
“So Mr. Tall, Dark and Mysterious, it seems we only have one last piece of evidence to try so please let this be it.” Childe held up the UV Flashlight. “Can you please touch something?”
The cold presence returns, this time on his hand. Cold fingers intertwined with his own and Childe holds back the instical urge to run and hide.
“Holy shit I just reached First Base with a ghost!” Childe squeals and the ghost gently squeezes his hand before fading away.
Childe quickly shines the UV light on his hand and sure enough there’s a glowing green handprint showing where the ghost had held his hand.
“We got Fingerprints.” Childe radios. “Oh my gosh does that mean if he touched my-”
Scara kicks the door open and if looks could kill Childe would already be hunting this house alongside his ‘boo’.
Childe merely laughs as he helps the two gather the equipment and circle ‘Phantom’ in their journals. Signora and Scara exit the garage and Childe attempts to follow before the door slams shut in his face, knocking him to the ground. The ginger jumps to his feet, pulling on the door handle with all his strength yet it doesn’t even move an inch.
“This isn’t funny, Scara! Let me out!” Childe yells, banging on the door.
“It wasn’t me!” Scara calls back, twisting the knob repeatedly. “I can’t get it open!
“It's hunting.” Dottore informs them through the radio.
The two outside run off to hide, leaving Childe to fend for himself. He turns quickly, ducking behind the boxes from earlier and turning off all his electronics. The heavy footsteps grow closer, strangely no other sounds accompany them. In all his years of his job, there has never been a quiet ghost when it was hunting. They always made some sort of sound, ranging from singing to just groans of pain.
What the hell was happening?
“I’m sorry for startling you.” A deep voice speaks, the footsteps stopping just outside of his hiding place. It's not a voice Childe recognizes yet sounds familiar, his mind scrambling to recall where he heard it before. His stomach drops when the dots finally connect.
It was the ghost.
Another anomaly. Ghosts never spoke in full sentences and they sure as hell never apologized for making him nearly shit his pants.
“I truly did not mean to scare you. I simply wanted to be able to speak to you and next thing I knew the door was locked and I was visible to you.” The ghost explains. “My name is Zhongli. Your’s is Childe, correct?”
Childe stayed quiet, worried it might be some sort of trick.
“I know you don’t trust me but I’m unsure of how to show you that I mean no harm.” Zhongli muses. “Perhaps we can just talk here like this for the time being?”
“Why aren’t you trying to kill me?” Childe whispers to test the waters.
“Kill you? Goodness, why on Earth would I try to kill you?” Zhongli sounds genuinely shocked and upset about the topic of killing him but you can never be certain with a ghost.
“Well most ghosts I meet try to eat my ass.” Childe talks at normal volume and when decayed hands don’t suddenly attempt to strangle him to death he continues. “Don’t get me wrong, it's a nice change! It's just…surprising. Also how are you able to talk fluently? And remain visible for so long?”
Childe couldn’t tell the time but it's definitely been longer than a hunt is normally.
“To be honest, I don’t know. Before today I couldn’t talk or show myself to others except for small events. This is my first hunt actually.” Zhongli admits sheepishly.
“Oh! Congrats!” Childe awkwardly laughs and Zhongli joins him.
The two eventually fall silent for a few moments before Childe feels brave enough to break it again.
“Why are you so interested in me?”
“Well you were attempting to court me, correct?” Zhongli asks, unsure of himself. “I do not know much of this time’s courting rules but you seemed interested in pursuing me. You looked cute and I enjoyed your free spirit and laughter. It livens up the place.”
Zhongli chuckles at his joke. When Childe doesn’t respond he clears his throat.
“My apologies if I misread the situation, it's been a long time since I’ve spoken to anyone else. It seems I’ve forgotten how to properly communicate with others.” Zhongli quickly explains, before his voice gets quiet. “And it's partly because you remind me of someone I knew once, a very long time ago when I was alive, so I became too comfortable in expressing my thoughts. For that I apologize.”
“Woah woah! You don’t need to apologize! It's a-okay!” Childe quickly reassures the ghostly man. “Sorry I was just…flustered. I was flirting with you but I didn’t expect a response let alone you feeling the same way so it took me by surprise…”
“Ah, I see.” Zhongli hums. “I’m glad that I didn’t scare you away.”
“Don’t worry, I’ve seen scarier ghosts than you. Phantoms are pretty common. Demons on the other hand, are an absolute bitch .”
“I imagine they are.” Zhongli chuckles.
“...can I see you?” Childe asks, his voice barely heard even by the supernatural being.
“Of course. And I promise I do not look as ghastly as most ghosts do.” Zhongli reassures.
Childe slowly sits up, eyes peeking over the boxes as he finally looks at Zhongli and what he sees is certainly the last thing he was expecting. A tall man stands before him, hands held behind his back as piercing golden eyes meet his own. Surprisingly the sight doesn't strike fear in him, instead he feels a strange warmth spread through him - similar to a rock that’s been laying in the sun for hours on end. Dark brown hair with amber tips frame the man’s deathly pale yet beautiful face. A detailed black suit jacket with a yellow undershirt is all Childe can view of his outfit from this angle. The man’s face is sharp and stern yet the expression he wears is soft, the sides of his mouth tilted upwards in a smile.
Oh no he’s hot!
Childe simply stares, mouth hanging open until Zhongli shifts under his intense gaze.
“I hope my appearance pleases you.” Zhongli chuckles nervously.
“Oh it certainly does.” Childe mumbles, still lost in the sight before him.
“Shut your stupid mouth and stop staring, your sanity is absolute ass.” Scara radios, apparently having made his way back to the truck with Signora while Childe was busing eye fucking the handsome ghost.
“Yes it's definitely a bad idea to stare directly at Phantoms.” Dottore agrees over the radio. “They drain sanity rapidly when gazed upon.”
“Your friends are right, you should get going.” Despite Zhongli’s attempts to hide it, sadness seeps into his eyes as clear as day.
“Don’t worry I’ll be back! I don’t know when exactly but there’s no way in hell I won’t come visit you again.” Childe promises.
“I would love nothing more than to once again enjoy your company, especially in a less professional setting.” Zhongli smiles but then it quickly fades. “...speaking of, I’m not quite sure how to stop hunting.”
“Don’t worry I can help!” Childe laughs, picking up the smudge stick and lighter. “It won't stop the hunt, it'll only stun you for a few moments but maybe during it you'll find a way to stop hunting?"
“Wonderful.” Zhongli leans forwards, pressing a cold kiss to Childe’s cheek again. The touch is so light it feels like he imagined it if he hadn’t seen it happen with his own two eyes. “Until we meet again, Childe.”
“Until then, Zhongli.” Childe returns the kiss, still somehow surprised by the unnatural chill of Zhongli’s skin.
Zhongli smiles wide as Childe lights the smudge, smoke filling the air as the ghost instantly vanishes and the door unlocks. Childe stumbles out of the garage and out of the house, face bright red as he hurries to catch up with his friends.
When Childe bolts into the truck, Scara looks at him in disapproval while Dottore grins widely, pulling out a cotton swab from seemingly nowhere and rubbing it against Childe's cheek before depositing it into a test tube he also pulled from the void.
“How’d it go, love bird?” Signora teases.
Childe blushes.
“I have a date with the world’s hottest ghost.”