Chapter Text
IV was scrolling on his phone, trying to get himself tired enough to be able to fall asleep, when he heard faint knocks on his door. Four hesitant taps, almost inaudible, unless the resident of the room was awake. In this case he was, so he slid out from under his blanket, making his way to the door to open it. Vessel stood in the doorway, which was somewhat surprising, since neither of his fellow vessels have seen him outside of his room for more than a few minutes in the past few days, noticing his self-isolating tendencies - which were a common occurrence – resurface, but unsure what to do to help him. They resorted to making sure he ate enough (even if it was just a little), providing him with food and gentle reminders that he is always welcome to go to any of them to talk, cuddle, get distracted or whatever he needed, no matter when or why he needed it. The policy was no questions asked if they weren’t welcome, comfort and safety was always priority and the free flow of love and affection was a given in their living situation, but each of them was gently reminded of it from time to time, when they were left feeling uncertain.
Vessel had a tendency to get lost in his solitude, forgetting how long it was since he left his room, how much time passed since he sought out contact with the others, instead focusing on writing, often forcing himself, pushing against his limits to create, even when his mind would, could not cooperate. The result would be desperate panic, sharp anger for not being able to fulfill his role as First, and intense self-hatred, quickly shut down by so much love, understanding and reassurance that Vessel would feel he was drowning in it. Though, it was definitely better than the feeling of a strong current dragging him away, his unmoored mind swarmed with half-formed thoughts, stuck in elaborate loops. The others quickly learnt that helplessness was most effectively dispersed by touch, grounding Vessel like nothing else, scattering swirling thoughts, pulling him out of his powerless drifting, confirming that he was real, present and loved immensely, always.
In the present moment, Vessel’s emergence meant that his self-imposed isolation reached the point of too much, tipping over to a yearning for any sort of contact from anyone he could find within reach. He probably sensed IV was awake, trying to refrain from waking any of the others anyhow, and was relieved, which made IV’s chest feel tight at the thought that Vessel would ever feel like he was bothering them. It probably meant that he might have reached out to them, knocking on a door on other nights similar to this, but it would have been so quiet – maybe not so unintentionally – that he got no answer and returned to his room, still alone and lost, bearing through the pain in his chest, and the voice in the back of his mind trying to convince him that he asked for too much, was being too needy, clung too close. IV quickly returned from that train of thought, determined to get Vessel out of his spiral as soon as possible, reaching for his wrist and pulling him into the room with a tight hug, pouring all the warmth and comfort he could muster into the action, hoping he could get his point across. You are loved. You are wanted. You are never a burden. IV felt Vessel tremble in his arms, not reaching around his middle, but embracing the feeling of being enveloped in affection, soaking it up like he was dying of thirst.
IV pulled back after some time, making sure not to let go of Vessel, squeezing his fingers with one hand to let him know that he’s there, reaching to close the door with the other. Gently, he led him to the bed, sitting him down at the edge of it, quickly arranging the pillows and blankets so they could climb in and get comfortable. They ended up with IV lying on his back, eyes on the ceiling, caressing Vessel’s back with his left hand, as he was curled up to his side, head on his chest. Vessel played with the fingers of his right hand absently, staring in front of himself, listening to the steady heartbeat under his ear. IV could feel the tension in his shoulders, the way he sometimes took long, deep breaths, eyes shutting closed, hands stilling for a moment. Once he regained control over his breathing, – IV helping him through it by providing a grounding pressure on his back, rubbing it in circles and taking deep breaths - Vessel would snuggle closer, earning a kiss on the top of his head, gentle fingers carding through his hair and tracing lines down his back.
Vessel did not say a word, neither of them did, presence and touch enough to prove that he was real, and wanted, all thoughts saying otherwise small, in comparison to the unfiltered love he received from his mate. IV made sure to leave out the traces of worry and sorrow from the flow, knowing that Vessel didn’t need any of that at that moment, putting those feelings away for later, to sort through them with the others, together. He knew that any of their partners would do the same for Vessel, for any of them who needed it, to the point that it was out of the ordinary for them to ever spend the night alone. It happened sometimes, and it didn’t always lead to nightmares or sleepless nights, the need for privacy familiar and understood, but most often at least, they paired up, or used a select bed to fit the four of them into, all tangled up limbs and comforting touches. They would need to talk with Vessel about his fear of being a bother to them, once again reassuring him that they would rather be awake and there for him, than bear the thought of him alone in his misery, turbulent thoughts troubling him and preventing him from getting any sleep.
Somewhere along these thoughts IV noticed the slackened figure of the man at his side, closely coordinated breaths evened out, soft puffs of air being the only sounds in the dark room. Vessel felt comfortable enough to fall asleep, his tired mind giving up the fight to convince him of false notions about his worth in the eyes of others. IV looked down on him with tired eyes filled with love, pressing a final kiss to his hair, before settling in to fall asleep with the comforting weight on his chest, providing him with a sense of contentment, finally feeling at ease with Vessel safe in his arms, undisturbed in his long-overdue and well-deserved rest.
In the morning, the soft rays of sunrise filtered in around the edges of the curtains on the window, waking IV gently. Before looking around, he noticed there were dips in the bed on both his sides, familiar snoring accompanying the additional bodies in their cuddle-pile. To his right, II was curled up on his side, legs close to his chest, snuggling with one corner of the blanket enveloping him. He must have brought it from his room, IV recognizing it as the one he always used, the once fluffy, white material rendered dull by frequent and loving use. Chest fluttering with affection, IV looked over to III’s sleeping form, who had both arms around Vessel’s waist, face propped up on his hipbone, nestled into the blanket and Vessel’s hoodie. IV felt like his heart would burst at the sight, realizing that the others probably sensed the sudden calm in the bond from Vessel, deeming it time to pile up on it, as they found them sleeping soundly. The way they knew what Vessel needed could not only be explained by their shared bond, - obviously, it helped - but they somehow understood each other so deeply, providing just the right things at the right moments, that it felt like second nature to them. They didn’t even hesitate joining IV and Vessel, just in case a nightmare would disturb them, but even if it didn’t, they just wanted to be there. Close to their loved ones, within reach, ready to engulf them in unconditional love and affection. IV felt immensely happy, drifting back to sleep, bond vibrating with appreciation for his partners.