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A part of Dan Feng knew it was the end, no matter how much he didn’t want it to be. It wasn’t the end of a life, but of a person, of the memories they shared. It was the end of them- it was the end of himself. Thanks to his powers and unsealing the Arbor, Dan Feng granted Yingxing immortality.
Immortality comes at a cost, Dan Feng should’ve known that. Yet as he thought back to his relationship with Yingxing, it would’ve been worth it to spend forever with him.
“Dan Feng,” Yingxing would say his name with such care- with a fragility that no one else regarded him with, “Would you like to get a drink?”
Dan Feng didn’t hesitate, “Of course.”
He was about to be forced to reincarnate. There’d been discussion on whether to just kill him, whether to exile him, but reincarnation is what he thought they’d settled on.
He wasn’t afraid to reincarnate, but he was afraid to lose his memories with Yingxing- as well as his memories with Jing Yuan, Baiheng, and Jingliu. As tragic as their end was, Dan Feng truly treasured his times with them.
“Do you ever think about reincarnating?” Yingxing asked him as he took a sip of his sake.
“Not really,” Dan Feng admitted. “I know it's a possibility- maybe an inevitability, but if I think about it too much, the thoughts may consume me and ruin the time I have left.”
Who would he be when he reincarnated? Would he lose himself along with his memories?
“That’s how I feel about death,” Yingxing had told him. “It will eventually come for me, but instead of dwelling on the inevitable, I want to forge as many things as I can… as a way to be remembered once I’m gone.”
Maybe it’d been an accident, a miscommunication, but Dan Feng thought he’d like to live forever. Maybe that assumption showed how he truly felt about reincarnating. Maybe he’d been slightly afraid of reincarnating.
“I’ll remember you,” Dan Feng added awkwardly. He’d always remember Yingxing. Dan Feng would remember his bright eyes, silver hair, the way he spoke in poems and his words felt like a gentle caress.
“I’m glad,” Yingxing chuckled, looking from the sky in front of them down to his bracer- the bracer that matched one on Dan Feng’s own arm. “It’ll be enough if you remember me.”
Dan Feng raised an eyebrow at that, before taking a sip of his drink. Was it really enough? What if Dan Feng reincarnated? Then his memory would be gone, useless.
Jing Yuan looked into his jail cell, “Was it worth it?” He asked, leaning against one of the walls. His words came out calm, genuinely curious.
“You know the answer to that,” Dan Feng lied, taking in a breath. Has it been worth it? Dan Feng wasn’t completely sure. The plan had been forever, but that wasn’t the outcome.
“I don’t,” Jing Yuan corrected, looking into Dan Feng’s eyes like he could look through him and into his immortal heart. “I don’t think you know either.”
Dan Feng clicked his tongue. Did he regret it? Even if the end was tragic, even if they’d never meet again… He’d done what he thought was right, he took a chance and it failed. “I regret my actions, but I don’t regret my time with Yingxing.”
Dan Heng woke up in a prison, shackled to the wall. He looked around him at the grey walls as he pulled at his shackles. Yeah, there was no way he could escape this.
“You’re awake,” A grey haired man walked into the area, leaning against the wall. A small hint of deja-vu hit Dan Heng.
“Who are you?” Dan Heng asked, pulling at the chains on his arm absentmindedly.
“A friend,” The guy responded. “A friend who’s glad to see you awake.”
Dan Heng didn’t know how to respond. He couldn’t exactly share the sentiment. “Right.”
The man appeared a couple days later, putting a spear on the wall he’d been leaning on the other day. Dan Heng didn’t know why but he felt an odd attachment to the spear, looking at the dark greens with curiosity. Maybe in his past life he’d wielded this spear? “This is yours.”
Dan Heng looked between him and the spear, “Do I know you?”
“You did, yes,” The guy looked at him with kind eyes. It was the most genuine care he’d been shown since waking up here. “Do you want me to tell you about it?”
Dan Heng felt a bit of curiosity at the words, but he didn’t indulge in it, “I’d rather not hear about it.”
It took time, but Dan Heng became his own person. He met March, Himeko, Welt and Pom-Pom and they became like a family to him. Whatever he’d had in the past wasn’t his , it was Dan Feng’s. He’d see glimpses of his past in dreams, including one grey haired man who he’d have drinks with, but those dreams always ended in pain.
As he walked around the Xianzhou Luofu, he met with a face that plagued his dreams; bright red eyes and dark hair. The man looked beyond furious at him, but Dan Heng didn’t know exactly why. He didn’t feel comfortable enough to ask though.
Dan Heng felt connected to the man. He’d been killed by him multiple times in nightmares, but underneath all the hatred, he felt something along the lines of pain, yearning. As the man held a spear up towards him and declared that they’d fight, Dan Heng felt a tickle in the back of his mind. Was this the man he’d spoken to in dreams? The man who he’d had drinks with, the one he had some sort of painful end with?
He couldn’t dwell on that though. Instead he held his spear up. He was not Dan Feng. No matter what this man’s connection was with his past life, he wasn’t that person. He was Dan Heng.
And with that, their fight began.