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The Invisible Street Bandits

Summary:

Jouno and Tecchou head off to a small farming village outside of Yokohama to help with a street bandit problem. The problem is they can't stop acting like crack heads long enough to notice all of the plot twists that I threw in there.

 

Also, happy birthday to Jouno

Notes:

Ah, ok, this is lighter than most of what I've been writing. So, there aren't any trigger warnings this time. I am gearing up for Whumptober though. So, if you want major angst, you'll have to wait for that.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Jouno wakes up knowing that it’s going to be a bad day. Everything is loud and uncomfortable. The blanket is scraping against his skin and his head is pounding. He sighs, pushing the blanket away even though the air coming from the air conditioner isn’t much better. 

 

Did Tecchou turn the air on again? Jeez, it’s winter, what the heck? 

 

He gets dressed slowly, wondering if he should just skip his run and workout this morning. Despite how much he wants to, he knows that he shouldn’t. Someone would notice, and everyone would ask. As far as it matters, nothing is wrong. He sidesteps the door as Tecchou’s door bangs open. Tecchou walks out, wandering past. He doesn’t even greet Jouno, causing him to frown. 

 

I wonder what’s going on there. If I had any more energy, I’d go after him. 

 

Since he doesn’t, he follows his usual routine instead, going for a run and then heading to the gym. The rest of his teammates are there, chatting as they work out. 

 

“Jouno, you’re here!” Teruko exclaims excitedly. 

 

Her voice grates on his frayed nerves, but he forces the grimace away from his face. 

 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

 

“You have a mission with Tecchou today. Fukuchi and I are stuck under a mountain of paperwork, but things need to be done.” 

 

“And we can’t do paperwork,” Tecchou says matter of factly. 

 

“Yes, I’m aware. What’re the mission details?” 

 

“There’s a farming village outside of town that’s having issues with street bandits. You guys are going to go down there, and do anything you can to help. Also, if they need help with anything else, you’ll help with that too. Humanitarian work, don’t you love it?”

 

“No.” 

 

“I do, I love it,” Tecchou says. 

 

“We know,” Jouno says, folding his arms. He walks over to the weight rack. 

 

“Let me spot you,” Tecchou demands. 

 

“No,” Jouno replies, sounding annoyed. 

 

No one says anything else to him as they work out, talking amongst themselves instead. Despite that, he leaves half an hour early, unable to handle their voices and how loudly they’re dropping their weights. It gets quiet when he stands up, everyone noticing that he’s leaving earlier than they are. Normally he leaves at least twenty minutes after they do, because his run takes so long. He takes a longer shower, enjoying the hot water. After blow drying his hair and getting into uniform, he walks to the conference room. That’s where Fukuchi and Teruko like to do paperwork, but that’s also where missions are discussed before they go. Fukuchi, Teruko, and Tecchou are sitting around the table, working quietly. Tecchou is reading over the mission details. 

 

“Wow, this really says for us to do anything that they ask us to,” he murmurs. 

 

Alright, I can deal with this. 

 

He clears his throat, announcing his presence. Everyone turns to him. 

 

“Hey,” Teruko says. 

 

“Are you almost ready to go?” Fukuchi says without looking up. 

 

His heartbeat is erratic, the only sign that something is wrong. 

 

“Are you alright, Captain?” Jouno asks. 

 

“Yes.” 

 

He’s hiding something. 

 

“Did something happen with Tachihara’s infiltration mission?” 

 

“No, but he might be coming back soon.” 

 

Jouno nods, deciding to drop it. He can investigate his strange behavior later. 

 

“Why are you being so weird?” Teruko demands. 

 

“No reason. When are we leaving?” 

 

“Right now,” Tecchou replies, standing up. “What’s that look for?” he asks as he walks over. 

 

“Your heartbeat is annoying me.” 

 

“Oh, ok.” 

 

His heart rate slows down, which does help settle Jouno’s nerves. He mentally berates himself for being so harsh when Tecchou’s just trying to help, but it doesn’t last long. Tecchou puts a hand on his shoulder, pin pricks igniting under his uniform. 

 

He forces himself not to move as Tecchou says,” Alrighty, let’s go now.” 

 

The drive there is quiet and uneventful. Not that Jouno would know since he puts his special headphones on that block out noise well enough that even he can’t hear. He doesn’t take them back off until they reach the farming village. It’s a little bigger than he expected, but it’s not one of the largest ones around Yokohama. Tecchou is still examining the ground by the time that Jouno is done taking in their environment. Tecchou’s cape blows in the wind as he crouches down to stare at the ground. 

 

“What are you doing?” Jouno asks, failing to hide his annoyance. 

 

“I’m looking for wildlife. There’s usually more wildlife around these parts. You know, since animals live around here.” 

 

“Hm, that is odd, but not as odd as the smell. Smells a little like the gas leak that we had at base. I can hear people inside of the village though, so it can’t be anything toxic. They all seem fine. Maybe whatever’s causing the smell is deterring the animals.” 

 

“Maybe, that’s strange though.” 

 

“We shouldn’t mention anything to the villagers. We’ll look into it ourselves after we’re done with our original mission,” Jouno says, walking towards the village. 

 

The man that drove them tells them to text him when they need a ride home, and then drives away. 

 

“And there he goes,” Tecchou says. 

 

He watches the car drive into the distance until it’s gone. Someone notices them as they’re walking up, so they run off to grab the person who called them. A short man with a cane meets them before they reach the first house. 

 

“That was fast,” Jouno mutters. 

 

Tecchou shakes the man’s hand. Jouno doesn’t offer his so the man just turns back to Tecchou. 

 

“So-” 

 

“Oh, Jouno’s in charge. You’ll want to tell him what you want. I’m not qualified to take your complaints.” 

 

“Oh, well, you should come back to my house so we can have tea and explain what we need from you guys.” 

 

Jouno nods, having to make a conscious effort not to shudder when his hair slides across his cheek from the movement. They follow the man back to his house. There are two people inside of the house, one of whom is obviously a child and the other one an adult female. 

 

“This is my wife and one of my children. My other kid is an adult now. She’s working, but you might see her later.”

 

“Wow, you guys are the soldiers that they sent us?” the woman asks. 

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Tecchou replies. 

 

“You guys are cute. Don’t you think that Sakura would think that they’re cute?” 

 

“Hana! Now is not the time for that,” he chides her and then adds in a whisper,” They’re also really strange. That one hasn’t opened his eyes the whole time that he’s been here.” 

 

Jouno clears his throat, not really keen on overhearing anything else. They lean back, away from each other as the man turns his attention back towards Jouno and Tecchou. 

 

“Anyway, there have been pirates nearby. We were hoping that you could stay until they come back so you can apprehend them. You could also go look for them, but the police have been looking for weeks without any luck. They usually hit about an hour from now, so you might not want to leave in case you miss them.” 

 

“That’s fine, we’ll stay for a couple of hours, and if they don’t show up, we’ll search for them,” Jouno replies. 

 

“Is there anything that Jouno and I can do around here while we wait for them to arrive?” Tecchou asks. 

 

“Yes, but you will need to change clothes first. If the pirates see you, they won’t come.” 

 

“That makes sense. Jouno, did you bring any other clothes?” 

 

“Not any that would make us fit in around here.” 

 

“We can provide you with clothes,” Hana interrupts. 

 

“Thank you, ma’am,” Tecchou says as she walks towards the back of the house, presumably to get them clothes. 

 

They’re both given clothes and lead to the guest bedroom to change. It’s a quick process and Jouno folds both of their uniforms to minimize wrinkles. He places them on the bed, drawing the curtains. The rough material of his shirt scraps across his skin uncomfortably. He shudders, readjusting his arms. It doesn’t help, the feeling filling his mind. Suddenly a hand is on his shoulder again, except he doesn’t hate it this time. 

 

“Jouno, are you alright?” 

 

“I’m fine,” he says, his voice steady and calm. 

 

“Alright, you just looked uncomfortable for a moment there. It was probably my imagination. That happens from time to time, as you know.” 

 

“Of course it was your imagination. Now get a move on. We have things to do.” 

 

Tecchou grabs Jouno’s hand as he pulls Jouno out of the room. Jouno makes a sour face, but doesn’t actually care to pull away. Hana and the child are gone by the time that they get back to the living room, but the man is still there. 

 

“I just realized that we never asked for this nice man’s name,” Tecchou whispers, and Jouno shrugs. 

 

“Why do we care what his name is again?” 

 

“Because it’s rude not to ask for people’s names, Jouno. We’d make The Hunting Dogs look bad if we’re rude,” Tecchou replies. 

 

“One time Teruko bit one of our clients. I don’t think that we’re gonna make The Hunting Dogs look bad by not asking for this man’s name. Especially since they’re country hicks in the middle of nowhere, and are already trying to set us up with their daughter. They’re crazy, and I doubt they even know who we are.” 

 

“Don’t be rude, Jouno,” Tecchou says,” and anyway, they seem like fine people.” 

 

“I’m not being rude, they are. Who tries to set up two men with their daughter at the same time? Especially if you just met those men?” 

 

“The Amish?” 

 

“Tecchou, you can’t just say things like that! You don’t know if they’re Amish!” 

 

“What’s taking you guys so long?” the man asks, turning to face them. 

 

“If you’re so torn up about it, ask for his name,” Jouno hisses quietly, still annoyed. 

 

“Sorry, we were discussing the Amish. What is your name?” 

 

“Kenzo, I apologize. I thought that I already offered my name. I don’t think that you two introduced yourselves either.” 

 

“I’m Jouno, and this is Tecchou. We’re going to step out now, we’ll check in later.” 

 

He strides out of the house, not even waiting for instructions on what they’re supposed to be helping with. 

 

“Sir, you did want us to capture the pirates, not kill them, right?” Tecchou asks. 

 

“Of course! Please don’t kill anyone! Anyway, in the meantime, can you guys go across the street and ask what they need help with? They should have something for you to do to kill time.” 

 

“Alright. Kill time, not people. Thank you sir, I’ll be going now.” 

 

He walks outside to find Jouno. 

 

“Jouno?” 

 

“What do you want? I’m trying to figure out where the pirates are coming from,” he demands, irritability seeping into his tone again. 

 

“To kill time, we are supposed to go across the street and ask what they need help with. We are not supposed to kill the people though. That was clearly stated.” 

 

“Tecchou, why would we kill the people across the street? What did they do to you?” 

 

“Nothing, I was talking about the pirates, Jouno. I thought I said that. Did I not?” 

 

Jouno sighs heavily, rubbing his nose. 

 

“No, you did not.” 

 

He walks across the street, knocking on the door as soon as he reaches it. A woman answers the door, giving them a smile. 

 

“You guys must be the government-” 

 

“No, we are not the government. We are part of the government though. I’m Tecchou and this is Jouno.” 

 

“I was gonna say government workers, but that’s great. Anyway, I’m assuming Kenzo is putting you to work while you’re waiting?” 

 

“Yes, is there anything we can do to help?” Jouno asks, elbowing Tecchou pretty hard. 

 

“Oww, Jouno, that hurt. That was mean of you.” 

 

He starts pouting and kicking the dirt. Jouno ignores him, turning back to the woman. She looks between them for a moment before focusing on Jouno. 

 

“Well, you can go out to the back of the village. There’s a field back there, and the workers are backed up. They could use your help as long as you’re good with your hands.” 

 

“Good with my hands how?” Tecchou asks.  

 

Jouno smacks him hard enough to force his head down. 

 

“Ignore him, we’re going to go back there.” 

 

The woman stares at them as Jouno pulls Tecchou by his hair towards the back of the village. 

 

“What the hell is wrong with you?” he demands as soon as they’re out of earshot. 

 

“My mental disability? It’s rude to bring that up at a time like this, Jouno.” 

 

“What? That is not what I meant! You can’t say things like that whether you have a mental disability or not. Heck, you can’t say that if you have five mental disabilities.” 

 

“Who has five mental disabilities? How would they function?” 

 

“They probably wouldn’t, but that wouldn’t allow them to say something like that. Just shut up and let me do the talking.” 

 

He keeps pulling him towards the back of the village. The field there is large with only a few people dotted around. Jouno walks towards the nearest one, finally letting go of Tecchou. 

 

“Hi, sir,” he says to the elderly gentleman that’s watering some of the plants. 

 

“Hello, youngster.” 

 

Jouno bites his tongue, forcing an insult back down his throat. 

 

“Who says youngster? How old are you, sir?” Tecchou asks.

 

The man looks offended and Jouno looks like he’d like to slit his own wrists. 

 

“Please ignore him, he’s mentally disabled. Is there anything that we can help with?” 

 

“Oh.” 

 

The man gets a sly smile across his face for a second before nodding. 

 

“Yeah, there are two jobs that we could use some help with. The opposite side of the village has another field, and they could use some help down there. Also, there’s a shop in the middle of town, it’s clearly labeled. They’re getting ready to go to the local market, and they could use some help.” 

 

“Alright, we’ll split up. Tecchou, where do you want to go?” 

 

“I’ll head to the other field. I don’t think I’d do well with packing for a market.” 

 

“That’s fine, but we’re walking together. I don’t think that clearly marked counts towards blind people.” 

 

He turns around, walking back through the village. 

 

“I don’t think it does, Jouno. I don’t think you could put Braille on a sign like that.” 

 

“True, and either way, that would require me to touch every sign I pass by. So, I’m not doing that. You’re going to point it out to me.” 

 

“I wouldn’t touch the signs either. They don’t look like they get cleaned.” 

 

Jouno gags, scrunching up his nose. 

 

“Ugh, that’s disgusting.” 

 

He suppresses another shudder as they walk. He tries to push everything out of his mind as they reach the center of town. After Tecchou tells him where the shop is, he heads over. He doesn’t care to knock since it’s a shop. He just lets himself in. He feels a sigh escape his throat immediately. At least a dozen girls are scattered across the room. They’re all close in age, somewhere between twenty two and twenty eight. 

 

“Hello, how can I help you?” the closest one asks. 

 

Her voice is high pitched and a little shrill. He cringes against his own instincts. 

 

“I was sent to help you guys pack up for the market.” 

 

There’s some giggling and whispering about how cute he is before the girl near him spoke again,” Well, that’s great. We could use someone to carry the boxes for us. It takes us a long time.” 

 

“Of course, if that's what you need, I’ll do that.” 

 

The whole hour and a half that he spends in the shop, at least two girls are hanging off of him or touching him. It makes his head spin and nausea swirl in his gut. He excuses himself to go do a perimeter check, barely keeping his tone neutral. 

 

I wonder if Tecchou’s dealing with the same thing. Probably is. That other field was almost empty yet they sent us away. They didn’t need any help at that shop. There were a lot of people there. I should probably go check on him soon… 

 

He takes a deep breath, steadying himself against the wall. He walks around, doing a quick perimeter check. There are no signs of the pirates. He frowns. 

 

That’s odd, there are no signs of any pillaging. If they come by every week like the report says, there should be some sign that they were there. I don’t think I’ve even come across anything broken around town. 

 

Jouno takes another lap around town looking for any sign that they’ve been robbed recently. He doesn’t find anything, so he goes to find Tecchou. His assumption rings true as Tecchou is in a field at the edge of town, surrounded by women all in their mid to late twenties. They’re all either flirting with him, or just admiring him as he works. He’s the only one working though. While Jouno isn’t surprised that they’re not working since Tecchou isn’t even wearing a shirt, he still tries to suppress a laugh, putting a hand over his mouth. Tecchou doesn’t seem to have realized that he’s the only one working. As Jouno comes over, he looks up. His face brightens. 

 

“Jouno!” 

 

“Hey.” 

 

He walks over, shooing the girls away as he approaches Tecchou. He still looks slightly amused though. 

 

“Those people seem nice,” Tecchou says,” but what’s with the look? Are my pants unzipped? You like to laugh at me when that happens.” 

 

“Well, you are a grown man. You should be able to zip your pants without me having to remind you. Anyway, that’s not relevant. Have you seen any signs of pirates around here?” 

 

“No, I haven’t,” he answers,” I would have dealt with them if I had come across them. How was working in the shop?” 

 

“That’s not what I meant. Have you seen any signs that they’ve been here at all? If I just came across this place, I wouldn’t assume that they’d ever been stolen from.”

 

“Well, not that I really looked for it, but now that you mention it, I haven’t noticed anything broken or anyone grieving for lost loved ones.” 

 

“Woah, slow down there, killer. No one died. I was just wondering if you noticed anything that I missed. We’re gonna go out and try to find the pirates now. We’ll start by heading to the West of the village since that’s where they said that the pirates are coming from.” 

 

He heads towards the West side, not waiting to hear what Tecchou has to say since he’s not interested anyway. Tecchou grabs his shirt and jacket, then runs after Jouno. They head West after hitting the edge of town. Jouno is quiet, focusing entirely on picking up the pirates’ trail. They only made it about ten yards outside of town before there was a small howling noise. Jouno perks up, hearing it almost ten seconds before Tecchou can. It gets louder quickly over the next thirty seconds. 

 

“What is that?” 

 

Tecchou looks around for what’s making the sound before looking at Jouno. 

 

“Can you hear that or is it in my head?” 

 

Jouno doesn’t answer, straining his ears. He turns to the ground right before people pop out of the dirt. They grab Jouno first, quickly subduing them both. Jouno wakes up feeling groggy. The first thing that he notices is that he’s alone. There isn’t anyone close enough for him to hear them. He feels around, taking in the dimensions of the cage he’s currently being held in. It isn’t large enough for him to stretch out fully. The furthest he can get is stretching out his torso, but keeping his knees bent. He can faintly hear two people coming towards him as he curls back up. It’s not long before they start talking. 

 

“Did you hear? We actually managed to catch two of The Hunting Dogs off guard. They’re gonna be worth a pretty penny on the black market.” 

 

Jouno sighs, the pieces clicking into place. 

 

There were never any pirates. I had my suspicions, but the villagers just didn’t seem capable of doing anything. 

 

The door opens, revealing the two men talking. 

 

“He doesn’t look so tough. He actually looks kind of vulnerable. Can he use his ability? Do we know what it is?” the second one asks. 

 

“No, he can’t use his ability. The black market has started selling suppressants, and we gave him those.” 

 

“Are those safe?” 

 

“I have no idea, but I think they work.” 

 

“Well, that’s good enough for me.” 

 

More pieces click into place. 

 

That’s why I feel so high. Suppressants haven’t been made stable enough for something on the black market to interact well with the human body. Crap. I have to get out of here and find Tecchou. 

 

He attempts to sit up as much as the cage will allow, but his head spins, throwing off his balance. 

 

“Look at him. He can’t even half sit up,” one of them laughs. 

 

By now his stomach is turning. 

 

Oh, at least with the drugs I can’t feel enough for my sensory issues to bother me. I would have thrown up on myself already. That is not happening. 

 

He grits his teeth, willing his stomach to calm and his muscles to stop shaking. It takes a minute for him to get his bearings again. The men are gone by then, probably to go make fun of Tecchou too. Jouno frowns at the idea. He feels around for the lock on his cage. There’s a keypad. He bites his lip thoughtfully before deciding on a course of action. He smashes the lock, causing the door to swing open. He slides out, letting his limbs adjust to being extended again. He only gives himself a few seconds before trying to stand. His legs don’t respond, refusing to even attempt to hold his weight. 

 

Crap, there’s no way that I didn’t alert someone. I have to get up. 

 

He drags himself across the floor, looking for anything that can be used as a weapon. The door slams open, hitting his hip. He bites back a curse as someone says something. It takes a second for the pain to abate and his hearing to come back. 

 

“Jouno, are you alright?” Teruko asks, kneeling next to him. 

 

“Ma’am?” 

 

“Oh, Tecchou wasn’t kidding.” 

 

“Kidding about what? Have you seen him?” 

 

“Yeah, he said that they gave him a dose of ability suppressants, but they gave you four. It wasn’t too hard for him to break out, but he couldn’t find you. So, he left and got me and Fukuchi involved. You look terrible though. I’ll help you up.” 

 

How long was I out? Jouno wonders as she pulls him up to his feet, causing his stomach to roll again. He gags to the side, even though there’s nothing in his stomach other than water. Teruko keeps him upright as he heaves before carefully picking him up to carry him out. It’s a quick trip back to their car. Jouno passes out right before they reach the car though. He wakes up in the infirmary at base. His senses are still dulled, putting him on edge, but it’s not as bad as earlier. Teruko is sitting beside his bed. 

 

“Hey, are you alright?” she asks as soon as she notices that he’s awake. 

 

“I’m fine. Where’s Tecchou?” he asks, slinging an arm over his chest. 

 

“He’s asleep in his room. He’s already slept off most of the drugs, so that’s good. You, on the other hand, almost overdosed on the way over here.” 

 

“Oh, that’s unfortunate. How’s my recovery look?” 

 

“Fine, you’re gonna be fine, and it’s not gonna be hard to get over. You did scare the crap out of me and the Captain though. I was not ready for that. I thought Tecchou was overreacting on how much they drugged you.” 

 

“Guess not.” 

 

“But, you’ll live to fight another day, and the people involved were arrested.” 

 

“Well, it would appear that things turned out this time,” he says nonchalantly. 

 

“Yeah, well, The Hunting Dogs don’t fail, do we?” 

 

“We don’t,” Jouno replies, a small smile gracing the corners of his mouth.

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed. If you did, feel free to leave a kudos or a comment. Also, why are there so few Hunting Dog tags? There are only like ten for all of them.