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When Edgeworth returned from his year long- disappearance, he wasn’t sure what he was expecting. He had never been the best at understanding people’s feelings, much less expressing his own, but at the time he assumed his message was pretty clear.
“Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth chooses death.”
Clearly meaning he was dead from his career as a prosecutor, right? After Phoenix’s response at the precinct, it looks like he severely miscalculated.
He wasn’t expecting the man to rejoice in his reunion with open arms, but he thought Pheonix would at least be thankful of his return to help. But he wasn’t. In fact, he was pissed.
Miles remembers the scene he caused, the way his voice rose and shook as if he was on the verge of tears. The way he looked at Miles so betrayed, telling the man that it would be better for everyone if he had just stayed dead.
It was a mix of grief, shock, anger, all these fierce emotions Miles had never seen in Phoenix, had he really mattered so much to the man?
When he had left Miles felt like he couldn’t handle his past and everything he became, he had to run away from it all. He was so sure he was a terrible person he never even considered someone would miss him.
He never thought about how much this would hurt Pheonix, really he didn’t think it would.
In short, after Pheonix’s outburst, Miles was left confused. Any normal person would try to talk it out, but Miles was never good at that, and anyways, they had some more important matters on their hand at the moment.
Working with Phoenix was tense to say the least. Pheonix didn’t want anything to do with Miles but desperately needed help on the case. He had dark eye bags, Miles is pretty sure he hasn’t slept since Maya was kidnapped. Miles had never seen him so- worn down.
-
As they continue to work side by side Miles almost feels hopeful that when it’s all over, he and Phoenix could just go back to normal. Working together for once, not on opposite sides, it felt nice. It felt right.
And when after so much work and so many sleepless nights, they manage to find Maya, Phoenix’s bright smile as he sees her again makes it all worth it. Miles had missed that smile, it was warm, sweet, and so full of life.
He hasn’t realized just how much he missed it. How much he had missed Phoenix.
But after hugging Maya, promising to visit soon as she’s taken to a hospital to be checked on, the smile fades as quickly as it appeared. He was exaughsted.
Miles hesitates but steps to stand besides the man, clearing his throat and glancing over at Phoenix.
“Are you alright?” He asks quietly, wanting to do something, anything, to comfort the man, but he wasn’t sure how.
Phoenix tenses and glances to him with tired eyes, his expression turning cold as his eyes meet Miles for a moment. It was like he saw right through him.
“The case is over Edgeworth, just- go home.” He muttered, sounding utterly defeated.
He leaves before Miles has a chance to respond. His heart sinking as he sees just how badly he had hurt Phoenix.
-
He hasn’t stopped thinking about Phoenix since the case ended. He felt so terrible, guilty, but also mad, confused, just- hurt. He had to leave, he couldn’t take being in that courtroom anymore.
The same courtroom where he realized his mentor shot his father, the courtroom where he was on trial for murder, the courtroom where he reunited with his childhood best friend, and with it dug up his entire past.
He had been broken after the von karma case, he had the right to leave it all behind- hell if anything he should be furious at Phoenix for being mad but- he isn’t.
God Phoenix, the first person to truly care about him, to be there despite everything and Miles left him with nothing but a shitty note.
He didn’t deserve Phoenix.
Miles sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose as Pess laid her head in his lap. She was always better at comforting people than he was. Miles smiled sadly and placing down his glass of wine before he ran a hand through her fur, staring up at the ceiling.
“What’s wrong with me? Phoenix was the one person to be there and I ruin things. God probably he never wants to see me again-“ he muttered, glancing to Pess as if she could respond.
Of corse she just stared at him, reminding Miles he was talking to a dog and Miles just groaned, holding his head in his hands.
He wasn’t sure Phoenix would even listen, or if he would even be able to explain himself, but he wanted to try. Phoenix was the best person he knew. Miles lost him once and ended up miserable for twenty years, he doesn’t want to lose him again.
-
It’s nearing midnight when Miles builds up the courage to show up at Phoenix’s apartment. He’s frozen at the door, wanting nothing more than to return home or maybe just fly back overseas and forget it all.
He cringes at the thought, why was this so scary to him? He must have stood out there for ten minutes before doing anything, a million scenarios running through his head of what might happen.
Before he can worry about it too much he takes a deep breath and knocks, wondering why the hell he didn’t wait until the morning. Pheonix is probably sleeping anyways, he should just go-
Miles doesn’t register the door opening until it slams right back in his face.
Great.
He knocks again, a bit annoyed that Phoenix won’t just listen.
Pheonix opens the door again and stares at Miles with a mix of anger and exaughstion. His hair is sticking in all different directions and he’s wearing some worn t shirt and sweats. Maybe Miles shouldn’t have worn his usual fancy getup for this-
He looks back at Phoenix and is at a loss for words as all his plans go out the window.
“I shouldn’t have woken you I’ll just go-“ he quickly murmurs. He couldn’t do this.
“Stop”
Miles freezes and decides to keep his mouth shut.
“Just- stop Edgeworth. I don’t know why you’re here but I can’t do it tonight, I just can’t.” He says harshly, his fists clenched and body all tense.
“Pheonix I- I know my departure was somewhat of a shock but-“
“A shock? You fucking left! You left and everyone thought you were dead!”
Phoenix’s voice trembles, filled with emotion he’s been bottling up since seeing Miles in the precinct.
“How could you just- leave? You could’ve called or told me or something! I was devastated! I spent the last year missing you and you were alive?”
Miles flinches as his voice raises, feeling even worse when tears begin to prick the corners of Pheonix’s eyes.
Phoenix takes a deep breath and sighs, glaring at Miles who still stood helplessly in the doorway.
Phoenix steps back inside, not bothering to slam the door this time. Miles follows him, carefully shutting the door behind him.
“I know. I’m- so sorry for what I did. I don’t expect your forgiveness I- I didn’t think I would hurt you so badly”
Pheonix sniffles and pauses, turning back to look at Miles. “How could you think I wouldn’t care? I thought you had died and- I wasn’t able to save you. I thought maybe if I had done something else, if I had just-“ he hesitated, not bothering to hide the tears flowing down his face now.
“I thought after everything that for once you’d stay with me. I thought you were getting better.”
Miles winced at the words, he knew the feeling of grieving someone all too well. How could he be so selfish to have put Wright through it.
“You’re right”
Miles sighed and avoided Pheonix’s gaze.
“I should have never left like that, I should’ve just told you but- I couldn’t stay there. After everything that happened I couldn’t do it all anymore but- Phoenix you did save me”
He hesitates, never having been so open before, but continues.
“I don’t know where I would be without you in my life. I still had to leave but- I never should have left only that note.”
“God what’s wrong with me?” Phoenix’s voice is shaky when he finally speaks, his arms wrapped tightly around himself.
“I’m still so mad at you, part of me never wants to see you again and yet I- I still miss you.” His words break off into a sob as all that bottled up frustration and grief finally breaks out.
Miles heart aches at the sight, still feeling terrible that his actions left Wright feeling this way.
Pheonix buries his face in his hands as a few more muffled sobs bubble up. Miles isn’t sure if Phoenix even wants comfort from him, but Miles can’t stand to just watch Pheonix break down this way.
He takes a tentative step towards the man and awkwardly pats his shoulder, eyes widening in surprise when Phoenix immediately turns and wraps his arms around Miles at the touch.
He buries his face against Miles fancy suit softly sobbing as Miles slowly wraps his arms around Phoenix in return, rubbing slow circles against his back. Not saying a word.
For a while they stay like that, awkwardly embraced as Phoenix sobs until his throat aches and the exuaghstion begins to catch up with him. He’s nearly drifting off in Miles arms by the end.
Miles isn’t sure what this means for them, it’s definitely not forgiveness, but, it’s a start. Gently he guides Pheonix to his bedroom and lays him down. God knows he needed the rest. He pulls the blanket up over Phoenix, stopping for a moment to gaze at his face now all wet from tears.
He isn’t sure Phoenix will even remember this by the morning. He isn’t sure if he wants Phoenix too. Miles isn’t sure what he wants anymore.
-
“Phoenix,
I truly am sorry for everything, I understand if you don’t want my forgiveness, or to even see me again. You have every right to be upset. However, if given the chance I would love nothing more than to rebuild our relationship- if that’s even possible.
Yours,
Miles Edgeworth”
When Pheonix finds the note on the door he debates even reading it, dreading what was surely another goodbye.
It wasn’t. He reads it over once, twice again, to be sure. It wasn’t a goodbye, it was a promise to be there, a promise to try and fix things.
He’s not sure he’s ever heard Miles as fondly as he wrote the letter in his neat cursive handwriting.
Pheonix is still mad at him, it’ll be a while before he isn’t. But right now he’s not focused on that. He’s too busy running his fingers over that last bit of text.
Yours, Miles Edgeworth