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The waves crashed against the shore, cool water stretching over the warm sand reaching up to tickle their toes before pulling back into the vast ocean. Gon stared into the horizon enjoying the cool breeze and warmth of Killua’s body leaning against his . Killua mumbled something in his sleep, snuggling closer to Gon, his breath slow and peaceful. Gon smiled watching him lazily flutter his eyes open, blue irises glancing around disoriented before acknowledging the body beside him, gaze trailing up until they met Gon’s serene eyes.
“Hey sleepy head.”
Those crystalline eyes did not react, half-lidded they stayed looking at him. Gon’s smile wavered as the seconds rolled by, confused by the distance in Killua’s eyes. He felt his heart slow, the sound of waves echoing in his ears, Killua’s hand coming to rest on his cheek.
“Gon.”
The amber eyed boy barely heard his name being whispered from his friend’s lips. Soft fingers caressed his face, Killua’s eyes looking at him but also beyond, the Gon reflected in his eyes being one of a different time. Gon held his breath allowing Killua to feel him, ignoring the instinct to pull back when Killua leaned forward much too close to his face. His heart clenched in his chest, the feeling of Killua’s breath fanning over his lips. His eyes fell to Killua’s lips wondering what it would feel like to kiss them.
“You’re here.” Killua mumbled, tears swelling in the corners of his eyes. He looked so relieved and vulnerable. Gon stared dumbfounded as the droplets rolled down Killua’s face followed by a quiet sob. “You’re alive.”
Still lost Gon took Killua’s hands in his and nodded, resting his forehead against Killua’s.
“Yeah, I’m here.”
Another sob and the tears continued to fall, Killua’s hands finding Gon’s nape, pulling him closer.
“I thought you were-. I-I saw you-you were-”
Gon brushed away the tears with his thumb, pulling Killua into his arms. He gave him a gentle squeeze, hiding his own threatening tears in the fluffy white mess.
“Shhh, no. It was just a dream. Nothing more than a bad dream.”
Killua let himself be embraced, his grip tightening with desperation. Gon hated the crack of Killua’s voice as he spoke, wincing at the sound.
“No but it was so real! I was there. I saw you, on the bed! You were d-”
Gon played with Killua’s hair hoping to sooth him back into sleep. He kissed his head rocking back and forth.
“I’m here now, with you, and I’m not going anywhere.”
“But you were-” Killua insisted, his words muffled against Gon’s chest.
Gon couldn’t help but smile at his stubbornness. He took Killua’s hand in his and interlocked their fingers, pulling away only enough to look at Killua in the eyes.
“Hey, look at me. See me? I’m here. Feel me. Feel the ocean, the wind, the sand. This is real. I’m alive. We’re alive.”
Killua stared at their joined hands, still in disbelief, with doubt. He sniffled, eyes trailing between their hands and Gon’s face. Not totally convinced, more like resigned, Killua nodded and nuzzled himself against Gon’s chest finding comfort in the sound of his beating heart.
“You were dead.” He said once more, conclusively.
Gon exhaled, swallowing to clear his throat. It wasn’t hard to stay optimistic but the reminder of the unpleasant memories still weighed on his mind, striking a numb fear in him.
“You left me.” Killua weeped, nails digging into Gon’s back.