Chapter Text
Harvey’s been to bad parties. Harvey’s been to REALLY fucking bad parties. But none have ever compared to this one. Firstly, all the lights and really he means ALL the lights were fully on in the house. Why would they do that? Obviously, he's complained about having to take someone home home based soley by the glow of clearly thrifted Christmas lights, but this was ridiculous. Well lit parties just really ruined the whole vibe. Despite this, just a mere 2 feet away from where he was sitting, some dude was just straight up asleep—on the ground—half empty bottle of beer slowly dripping into the floorboards. Some girl walked by, and gingerly stepped over him just to plop her bare (bare???) foot directly into the puddle of beer. She was, however, way too drunk and didn’t seem to notice.
On that note, the one potentially redeeming quality of this party was that there was an unfathomable amount of alcohol. In fact, Harvey wasn’t sure he’d seen any mixers at all much less water. There were at least 3 tables heavy with 40s but really light on anything else. He was pretty sure that when he arrived, there'd been a bowl of lemons on the table to his left, but now the bowl was gone and a small pile of lemon wedges sat on a soggy napkin. Whoever organized this party was a mess, clearly, because this was a mass poisoning world record in the making. Heck, Harvey wasn’t even sure how, but they managed to get only green solo cups. They seemed to be a St. Patty’s Day special, but honestly even he was at a loss how these were at a party in September.
“Anyway so that’s why the dialectical in Plateau’s Republic is so critical to our understanding of Shakesperience tragedy.”
“Mhmmm, that’s exactly how the Shakesperience critiqued the Western structure of power. Harvey, any thoughts?”
Oh God, Prince was goading Danny into saying stupid shit again. The blonde boy definitely didn’t know his limits and he no doubt believed he was spinning thesis-worthy thoughts right now.
“Yeah you guys enjoy the Shreksperience or whatever the fuck I’m gonna go find someone intelligible to talk to.”
“Your loss,” Prince hummed languidly.
“Wha-hat? No, no! Come back I need to hear how you think Franklin Bacon had the effect on LGTV movement in Weiner Germany,” Danny whined, tugging on Harvey’s sleeve.
“Oh, Danny, Danny, please elaborate, I'm listening” Prince tapped Danny on the shoulder.
Harvey was glad Prince spared him whatever Danny was rambling about. Although it was fun to mess with Danny, Harvey didn’t go to shitty house parties for that. He would freshen up his drink then go meet some people or something. You never knew when oppor–
“Oh, oops! Shit what?”
Some Asian guy he didn’t know had backed into him, clearly doing some stunt that his friends had convinced him to do which apparently didn’t involve wearing a shirt.
“Hey it’s cool, you’re lucky you didn’t spill your drink on me. This shirt’s expensive” Harvey said, half ironically, half joking. The guy seemed dazed, definitely entering the early stages of a stupor.
“Woah yeah, that’d suck” he agreed, but then he held up some sort of cupholder with a handle "but like I won’t spill cuz I have this!”
“What?” Harvey was confused.
“Yeah, it’s a centrifugally stabilized drink holder. I made it myself in the makerspace. But lowkey I kinda hate that name because like it’s based on centri petal force but like that doesn’t really describe what it does but centrifugal is fake. It’s all reliant on load and gravity–”
“Dude, I don’t need a lecture, it’s cool you made it, but like what does it do?” Harvey decided that he’d bite. This guy seemed interesting, and it was kinda cute how he was so into this. He wouldn’t have kept him, but the friend group had scattered and had been replaced by a pair of violently drunk boys making out.
“Oh bro I don’t need to tell you–I can show you.”
The expression on the boy’s face was suddenly very focused. Without warning, he swung the little holder wildly in Harvey’s direction. Harvey recoiled but miraculously none of the jungle juice in his relatively full cup spilled.
“Huh, I guess this is worth something after all!” Harvey chuckled. “I’m Harvey by the way, nice to meet you.”
“Oh, hah, yeah thanks! I’m Mitt,” the guy said, eyes shining at the approval.
“You’re like, so tall,” Mitt drawled out, then he put a hand on Harvey’s bicep. “And ripped too, damnnnnnn.”
“Thanks, I know,” Harvey smiled at the dopey boy in front of him. Mitt was awfully endearing.
“Bro, you should come and meet my friends, they’re gonna–” However as Mitt stepped to turn around, he immediately slammed his face into a door frame and ate shit.