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tsukasa had done it. he’d gotten the role - rio.
rui walked up to him, nene and emu trailing behind, with varying expressions. emu looked all giddy, bouncing on her feet, whilst nene had a look of the utmost determination. her face softened as the three approached. "wowie, tsukasa-kun you were super super wonderhoy!!!" emu congratulated, shaking her hands.
"yeah, you did well." nene nods in affirmation.
"thank you! i couldn't have gotten here without my beloved troupe!"
“why don’t we celebrate, tsukasa-kun? after all, this is a momentous occasion.” normally, he would’ve accepted. celebrating his triumph and step forward to becoming the world future star he’d always dreamed of being.
“a splendid idea rui! however… as sakurako said i'd have to practice even harder now that i have the role, i'm afraid i must decline!" as much as celebrating would've been fun, as a star, tsukasa had to practice as much as possible.
"i see… well, if you're sure." he worriedly furrows his brow, crossing his arms. emu frowns,
"tsukasa-kun!! you should at least eat, right?? you know how rio feels now so you don't need to not-eat anymore!!"
"ah yes, i should definitely eat something, at the very least… i shall see you all at practice tomorrow!"
"see you…" nene frowned as well, watching tsukasa walk off.
'hm… i feel somewhat bad but i ought to rehearse even more if i want to play this role perfectly! then again, food will also give me more energy to use in shows…'
tsukasa thought to himself as he walked away from the stage.
he felt tired. really tired. but alas, he'd have to push through! because would he be able to call himself a star otherwise? no, he must certainly would not be able to!
tsukasa entered his house, finally. still unable to decide between eating to gain energy, or using that time to practice instead.
still, he figured he owed it to himself to eat something. and if his stomach growled, it'd disrupt the practice. though, for a reason he couldn't place, tsukasa felt… repulsed by the idea of eating. he didn't know why, but nothing seemed appetizing to him at the moment.
he figured he'd practice and then sleep it off.
which didn't work whatsoever. the next morning, he prepared something for breakfast. still, he merely poked at it. this confused him, to say the least but he didn't think much of it.
today was a weekend which gave him more time to practice. saki was out with her friends today and his parents were on a day trip, meaning the house was all his. perfect.
this cycle repeated for a few days after, he'd brush off the worried glances and questions — he was worried too, he wanted to know why he hadn't had the appetite for things as of late.
tsukasa had also decided he'd try more methods acting — if a character was one with scars all over his body, tsukasa would try to replicate that, so he knew how to feel the character's pain. he wouldn't cut deep, no matter how tempting it was, as he wanted to feel a character's pain to its full extent.
some part of him felt this was wrong, but it was overcome by his goal to play each and every character correctly, no matter what he had to accomplish to do so.
the next few days had been a blur, tsukasa wouldn't pay attention in school, would barely do so when being spoken to about anything other than shows. and even then, it was only when it came to discussions about playing rio and the show he was in, tsukasa would be completely focused.
people were worried, tsukasa thinks. he can't seem to care. perfecting rio was more important.
people would ask why his hands were covered in bandages. he'd respond "rio injured his hands badly." and move on. people would ask why he'd gotten so frail. he'd respond "in case any character i have to play goes a long time without food. more than three days."
tsukasa was barely present save for during rehearsals. he couldn't seem to care for anything outside of that.
one night, tsukasa was reading a script, not the one for the show he'd been so fixated on, but one he'd been dying to do for a while, he quite liked this one, sure, it was morbid but it had good characters and a good lesson. what more could you ask for?
tsukasa was aiming for the main character as always. this show's main character gets badly hurt, worse than what he'd done for rio or any other script he'd read as practice.
but that was okay. he'd do it.
and as tsukasa slipped out of consciousness, body numb and soaked in crimson, he thinks: "i've finally done it. i've accomplished becoming what a star truly is."
