Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

 in a relatively clean mcdonalds toilet, somewhere in the outskirts of florida ground,dahvie stands.
a needle in his shaking hand,and his feet trembling. "this is the third time today" he whispers to no one but himself as he pushes the needles tip under his skin.
Hes an addict, he knows. but its just temporarily, only until jay returns, he swears to himself, time and time again.
the door opens suddenly.
fuck its that annoying bitch from the mcdonalds counter.
dahvie wonders what her name was, esmiralda? he settles on that.
but ofcourse she had to continue her annoying ranting and shouting in the MENS toilet, why was she here anyways?
"Get out of there, fag! this aint no junkies parlament" she exclaims in the most annoying voice ever.
dahvie is a little scared, because, well she has some sort of authority over him, and he remembers the things usually happening when someone calls him that word.
although he isnt gay, ofcourse.
he decides to step out of the stall, flushing to make it seem like he wasnt injecting heroin but actually had to-.
bad idea, esmiralda was now directly in front of him once more, a deja vu from the time he had ordered at the register runs through his mind.
but she isnt here to take orders from him this time, he was here to take hits from her.
as she leapt forward and pressed her flat hand onto his face, like a woman, because thats what she was, ofcourse.
"huh i can fight a scrawny female" dahvie thinks, but this isnt some ordinary female; this is esmiralda!
"esmiraldaaaaa TERMINATE" she screams while doing weird dancing moves or whatever, like she was one of those sailor moon characters.
nothing happens, she must also be on crack.
"weird, it worked at home, i swear!" she takes a step back. and just as dahvie thinks hes spared she runs towards him once more, grabbing him by the neck, choking him, his back hitting the toilet stalls door.
but her intensions are not murder. She is a self proclaimed abuser, not killer.
dahvie falls to the floor with a loud thud, the noise repeating as esmiraldas 34cm boot with a blade as a heel connects to his stomach.
"stupid woman" he thinks, as it seems she forgot to remove the cap of the blade.
ofcourse, she does not realise.
"haha serves you right, you fairy! dont ever step your gay ass in my mcdonalds ever again! or ill give you hell!"
she (wo)man-handles his body out of the bathroom window, since the mcdonalds was spread over 7 stories to make room for all the obeseses and the bathroom was conviniently at the top, he had quite the fall.
his fall, finally interrupted by a huge soft plastic-y (nothings real in a world of plastic) ground, is the most exciting thing happening since jay left.
a weird stench hit his nose, "ahh this shit smells worse than my fucking bedroom!" dahvie yells out, although in utter pain from both the beating and the fall.
but hes distracted by what seems to be another man who has experienced asmiraldas outbreak, a few, meters away.
oh my god, hes at a garbage disposal!"fuck my life, kill me twice..." he murmurs....
looking around, he sees nothing but piles of garbage, and this next to the worlds largest fast food "restaurant"?
that means all of this is food remains.. and oily filthy packaging, used toilet paper and former managers dead bodies?
"im so dirty babe..." he whispers, pulling his knees to his chest and crying, thinking of all the things he did wrong: "i shouldve never stolen that witches star wars lego collection" maybe if he hadnt, he wouldnt have been cursed and jay wouldnt have left?
he wonders, what jay is doing right now.

JAY POV
lights are flashing and shitty EDM is blasting from someones ipod, hooked to the huge HIFI setup in the club room.
its been 420 days since hes left and hes never regretted it, never until now. where here he stands alone, in the club, him and dahvie used to frequent.
but instead of reliev, because hes free, all he feels is dread and regret. but a club is no place to mentally get fucked, so he makes the hard decision to leave.
1 meter left to the door, the lights are too much and everything is too loud, he has to get out, so he does.
reaching the door, pushing it, passing. hes out, oh wait hes not, theres another door.  like this is some kind of submarine, pathetic. repeating the previously mentioned steps, he finally steps foot outside.
leaning on the bricked up wall, he sighs, fondling his pocket, and pulling out a pack of cigarettes, he takes one out and stuffs it in his mouth, while putting the now empty pack on the trash he retrieves an old lighter out of it.
he holds it to his mouth and accidentally lighst his fucking hair on fire."ah fuck this shit!" he yelps, spitting the cig out and violently stepping on it.
this is the worst day EVER.
now he decided to just sit on the floor, and weep.
a boot lands in front of him, grabbing is attention (obviously, its in front of him retard) he looks up to see a handsome, youthfull stranger staring down at him.
hes mesmerized, but holds his guard: "yeah?" -that came out really desperate and weird.
"hello im atom, you are..? EXACTLY the guy i was looking for, jay von monroe? AMIRIIITEEE??" -the mysterious guy, apperantly "atom" -what a retarded street name, says.
"eh yeah" jay confirms, standing up and looking down at "atom" who seems to be a little surprised at his height, and reluctantly (?) takes a step back.
"a-a-alrighty theeeeeen ive got someone who wants to talk to youuuuu, so follow me, if you need a little, controversy! because i have been informed that YOU my friend have some on-going beef with a certain 'dahvie vanity' and guess who i just located!"
what?? this guy, this rando, had located DAHVIE VANITY years after he went undercover to hide from jays revenge seeking alliance? hes crazy! but whatever, he decides, not like hes got life left here: "alright, where's he now?" jay asks.

the guy smirks, leans closer to jay and says "oh i dont know, like i said i know someone who wants to meet you, she knows where he is, and a little side note, she works with J.U. so you better be real polite, and do as i say"
ANYONE who ever walked the streets of new york (which is the biggest city in florida you elementary school dropouts) knows J.U. hes the ultimate gangster! the ultimate streetler!
if you pick beef or imitation beef with him, youre a dead man, or child, because women do not dare to step up against him.
so of-fucking-course jay is quick on his trip to follow this wanna-be gangster who appreantly is much cooler than him because he works with or probably for J.U.

"a white van, seriously?" uh these new yorker 'gangsters' are getting more and more steretypical.
"duh! and guess waht, youre also getting tied up" the man says, or rather attempts to say, his voice is desperately shivering.
jay feels as though hes not very content with his current job. so he settles on the perfect plan to make this more pleasant for both of them.
he pulls out, the one, the only, UNO REVERSE CARD! stabbing 'atom' in the chest with it, who has now passed out from teh exhaustion of the defeat.
jay pulls the guy into the vans back and ties him to the weirdly positioned cross on the wall. hanging him up kind of like jesus, it looks very weird and sensual, he has to admit, but this is what this dude was gonna do to him, so better give him a taste of his own medicine (or something)
"alrighhhhhht" he slurs, still a little tipsy, settling into the drivers seat.

he exhales, looks around and realises, "fuck! why do i need a co-pilot for a fucking van?!"
"thats because its the fastest in the galaxxy!" he hears a shout from the back, wasnt the guy knocked out? "it completed a police chase through the entire USA in only 23 Meters!"
jay is quiet as to not point out the fact that it makes no sense to measure time in something like meters. because, hey this dude would have to be his co-pilot.
how is he gonna pull that off anyways?
"alright stop belittling me because it makes no sense that i just said 23 meters" what?? "What??" atom imitates jays thoughts. this fucking faggot can read peoples mind? or whut?
jay decides to speak anyways, "you fucking retard could read my mind all along and still managed to end up tied to a cross like jesus?"
'atom', now standing behind jay and massaging his shoulders, for some reason -presumably to keep him calm from his outbreak, exclaims: "what are you talking about? are you the one retarded here? you really think those supernatural kind of powers exist in our world here? and even if, hangin on that cross was quite erotic"
it was not. it looked fucking stupid,this dude was not jesus, but whatever.
"okay you fucking fag come sit here and assist in driving this piece of shit thing, i dont care about your weird biblical fantasies." jay spits
but 'atom' is sure to deny: "haha you really think im gonna co-pilot in my day-bay? get out of my fucking seat and situate your ass on the co-pilot space"
jay doesnt really have an option as he knows nothing about this shitty vehicle anyways, he doesnt even have a normal drivers license, but who does in new york?
"where we headed" he asks, having the slight suspicion, it might be canada -everything, is canada.
"ugh yeah, we are going to canada, now hurry the fuck up were already gonna be late." 'atom' replied, jay swears he can read his mind.
"pff yeah, sure, let me just drive with this retard claiming to know J,U, to some destination. for like, what, 7hours? oh and dont forget i don't even know your real name!"
jay debates (?not really a debate, whatever)  but to his pleasant surprise the boy answers:

"well on the canadian streets, they just call me I.S."

Chapter Text

it had now been greatly over 6 hours of insufferable mindless rambling from his left ear and jay is starting to suspect, that this dude was taking him somewhere completely different, the chatter just being a distraction which had proven not working in I.S. favor, making jay realize much quicker how much time had passed. It is now well into the night, the cars hopefully-still-working clock reading 1 am. In new york, considered the most dangerous time, but they are not in new york anymore that is for sure.

Jay is in great danger, he attempts a glance at his co-driver. I.S. -seeming to notice, flashes him a quick smile, although now seeming much more nervous as though he is unsure of his plan working out. What an idiot he was to even think for a second a man with weird looking silver and black (totally dead) hair is ever going to be sincere. He is probably lying about working with J.U. as-well. Who OPENLY claims to work with the one and only J.U thats like a self inflicted death sentence! This man is either totally retarded or just a really deceiving person. Jay is not sure what he would prefer.

"sooooo... you say, you work with J.U. thats quite the bold claim. Now tell me, mister S. can this claim really be backed up?" he tests his theory. "eeh yeah, about that, maybe" he starts "just maybe, i may or may not have exaggerated ever so slightly" I.S. seems in much more distraught, hesitant even. Jay is just as firm as ever: "and what exactly does that mean?" I.S. shifts in his way-too-big seat, jay wonders for whom this vehicle was built. "well you see, i am on a mission to find you, as my commander has instructed me to do." this guy is obviously avoiding the most embarrassing part of his confession: "who is your commander, I.S" jay says those letters in a mocking voice, as to belittle him further, get him to confess fully. But he does not: "well you see, she-" jay is astound: "A WOMAN?!" how does a woman acquire such powerful position? "yeaaaah?? shes quite a strong one lemme' tell ya' that! she like, shes got one of those ehm, those like, shes got uhm what do you call these? iphones! yes shes got an iphone!" an iphone? thats what gives her this power? this is so dumb, it could almost be one of those shitty fan-fictions. Who ever thinks iphones are superior is under a severe case of brain control anyway.

deciding he's had enough of it jay easily pulls out his handkerchief on which he spills a few drops od chloroform every-time before he goes out, just to be safe or-course. Steps up on his seat, the car still driving, as he secretly put it in autopilot while I.S. wasn't looking. Straddles his lap and just as I.S. is seeming to comprehend what is happening, opening his mouth to voice -something, he stuffs the whole thing in! wait what? you have to smell it? oh fuck. "ehm yeah sorry 'bout that, never had to use this." he pulls it out and actually holds it under his nose for a mere 10 seconds until I.S. is successfully passed out, -again!

now that weird jesus cross will come in handy for an actual execution! yes thats jays final decision, I.S. is getting hanged on a cross! like his pale emperor, jesus christ! (what the f does emperor mean?) Jay picks I.'s body up and carries him to the back where the cross is situated. This dude's quite heavy, he certainly works out, or some-thing. The vehicle shakes violently, making jay drop I.S. -eh he was gonna do that anyway, not like it matters If hes got a few more bruises. he just hopes he doesn't stir awake now. that would probably lead to another melee fight.

Hosting the cross up is a really difficult task, the thing probably weighing like 76543kg! woah, and hes gonna have to hoist this full-on-man up on it as-well. why not just tie him up with cable ties? ugh- what a complicated life. well as a wise woman once said, he is gonna have to "just do it".

the rest of the drive went on without any further trouble, as it came out you do not actually need a co-"pilot" for this van, that was merely some custom installations -regarding the display, and some junky coding -regarding the warning on I.S.'s part. -probably got bored or something. everything else seems to practically fall apart, attempting to stop the autopilot the buttons just came right off, leaving jay now very frustrated. at least its finally quiet. leaving jay with some quiet time to think, thoroughly. like: where the car is driving, or why it is driving there and is this guy actually Isaac shaw? jay is starting to suspect he is not.

all this stress gets him thinking about WHY he was actually retrieved, dahvie vanity, someone had his location, and jay does need it very desperately, maybe he should be nicer to the people whom have duty of bringing him there. but well, the car's on auto pilot anyways so he'll get there, thinking about that: how long is this gonna drive for? the only way to figure that out would be to ask his 'prisoner' in the back. but he's dead now, and unless he actually is jesus he will not resurrect either. Maybe he is jesus. or maybe the I.S. aren't initials -well somewhat not, but just short for Indian Spy or intense seducer -well he did seem to lack the seduction part quite a lot so that one's crossed out. maybe it just means 'In Service' and is actually followed by a number and hes just an android operating for his 'commander' as he called her. well, as they say -or don't: Only one way to find out!

"welcome to this farce" he hears, from his seemingly not-so-dead prisoner. oh hell no! this dudes still alive? or alive again? jay swears he was actually dead! i mean he did pay attention to doing all the steps right! so how was it he survived? or resurrected? was he jesus? or he is an android! that makes much more sense. but no, he had to put nails through his arms (very brutal and sadistic, but the only possible way) and there was real blood coming through! -the lack of visible pain obviously explainable by the influence of chloroform, but he is awake now, that means he must feel the terrible pain! this is horrendous! okay okay, what can he do.. "don't worry 'bout that; i forgot what pain felt like when i was brought into this organization. What you should be worrying about is getting me my god-damned clothes back!" oh right, he is still naked, very unpleasant for the both of them, surely.

alright, clothes.. eeeeh where were they.. oh yeah, "ehm well yeah they kind of fell out, but dont worry there is a closet right here! im sure we will find something for you." there is a closet, yes but it looks everything other than inviting, some might even be afraid of opening it, jay knows he is: "uhm eyah if you want clothes go to that closet and eh, like, get some i guess." he must admit, penetrating someones arms with nails and then making them get their own clothes after they somehow miraculously survived is rather cruel, but at-least he is giving him clothes, right? yeah right. oh right! (3x) how is he gonna get up if hes nailed to a- if hes what? where is he? "fuuuuuuuuhck..." jay breaths, how is this possible, he really must be jesus. doesn't matter. as long as hes not hostile its fine.

I.S. is casually rummaging through the contents of the old closet, finding just what he expected -old rotten clothes, very much nothing like his own previous clothes, he makes a mental note to get that money out of jay later. this is all so exhausting, maybe he could take a nap here? No, clothes first LOL. although none of them fresh, but all rotten, he does find some actually okay-looking pants and a somewhat-fitting t-shirt, -eh better than nothing. now he can peacefully sleep, not like that hibernation thing that was going on when he was for some reason nailed to a cross, does this guy think hes jesus? total weirdo, well this trip is far from over and surely will be interesting, hasn't it been so far? well hes surely gonna dream of possible other scenarios that could occur. "pm-suspend" he whispers, and surely, he falls asleep.

jay seems to have figured out that maybe I.S. has the upper hand here, so theres nothing he can do at this point in time, and maybe, just maybe he does get to meet the one and only J.U. did i say nothing he could do? well nothing of major use, but he can explore, and who dislikes exploring? i mean, and hes just now come to realize; this van has like seven hundred rooms, what? this is some kind of magic, surely it didn't look that big from outside. although this wouldn't be much stranger than literally meeting jesus or something.

well he decides starting with the most 'flamboyant' room is a great idea, as it obviously is the most intriguing, and looks a lot friendlier than even the closet, which HEY! is home to like the greatest thing ever, clothes! whatever, must've only had literally shit-clothes anyway. maybe I.S. went in there? whatever, jay's going in the cool door, probably a death trap, hah!

It is nothing like he had anticipated, ehrm its rather, dark. very dark and, the door is kind of erh, locked. yeah this was definitely a death trap.. lets search for.. Aha! a light switch, who would've though, huh? alright, and who wouldve thought the light was gonna be bright pink?! this is the weirdest room ever! and what is that in the background, it looks like those fluid filled containers they store living beings in in those sci-fi movies. and upon closer inspection, there does appear to be a human being inside. or so jay assumes, because apparently he is living in a world that is already in a such advanced scientific state that not everything that looks human -actually is.

so, this dude, who is like- practically jesus, keeps humans in his van. okay realistically these are probably not even his and he has no idea they exist because he stole the van. But the question really is, why they are here. Soooo much weird shit going on. eh fuck this maybe the guy in the container knows how to unlock the door.

now, standing before him, in all his glory, -with his pink still-spiked-even-though-having-been-exposed-to-fluid-for-a-very-long-time-hair and some weird pants cut open in the middle, also very- very pink, oh and not to forget the half open color coordinated dress-shirt with a matching tie that EVERY somewhat punk or emo resembling band wears EVER. it makes a lot of sense to jay why the room is lighted up in very pink.

the tank opens, and the 'man' steps out: "HAHA tricked ya' didn't I!? you thought i was some EXTREMELY SPECIAL life from that had to be preserved, from a war or plague, or that i was like- practically dead so they froze me to maybe be healed in the future if they find a cure? but no baby! i was juuuust taking a good ol' nap! and don't come at me going like 'oh thats a bit much for taking a nap isn't it??' okay, so what? not like you're in command of this ship, now where we headed."

this, jay had expected the least. and he is frightened, for sure: "ehrm sir, to be honest i do not know, as teh car has been on autopilot for the last... i dont know but my last grasp of info was that we are heading to CANADA, because ofcourse. like- CANADA! but erhm, we have been driving for over 7 hours now and the car doesnt seem to stop soon." "hmmm" the man looks around, "wait, did you say car? where the hell is my ship?" this is just what jay needs right now, some crazy guy thinking hes some sort of i don't even know! are all these people crazy? or maybe hes crazy? what is going on?

Chapter Text

I.S. has awoken, and decided to issue a meeting of the whole crew in the lobby, due to some uncalled for complications that have occurred on the ship.

"alright, i see you've acquired quite the refugee here." J.U. throws in the round. Jay, is NOT a refugee! but he decides that's a debate he can have after hes got out here successfully, he should focus on that. "well, jimmy, i am certain you're aware that jay right here, is NOT a refugee, he, in-fact, has to be brought to Esmiralda IMMEDIATELY!" wow this really is the one and only jimmy urine! "pff you really thought i was lying this whole time, didn't you?" jay looks over to I.S., he is reading his mind again. "haha" jimmy says. "oh you shut the fuck up man! do you even know where you are? i bet all that crack you smokin' is not of advantage now." I.S. screams, when did things get so heated? jimmy calmly stands up: "why, did you let him in? do you not know the danger? did nobody inform you about the standard procedure and why its important?" suddenly I.S. drops to the floor, onto his knees, and he prays. but not for long until jimmy interrupts him by stepping a foot in front of him; I.S. -used to this by now, gets on his hands and knees and starts chewing on the shoe, a sign of apology on jimmys ship, everyone knows that. if you listen closely you can hear him whisper to himself, "i am not in danger... i am the danger.."

as jimmy and I.S. were distracted with... obscure procedures, jay took the opportunity to flee, now hiding in the closet in which I.S. had changed, previously. he suddenly feels a strong wave of emotion, for his old clothes, which he realizes he might never see again, just like everything else in new york. eh man, fuck new york! the closet is awfully warm, so so warm...

jay awakes to the vehicle violently shaking, and seemingly slowing down from a sudden acceleration, did this trash can finally crash? one can only hope, freedom might be near!

suddenly, two very distraught men, which jay recognizes to be I.S. (the android) and jimmy urine (the craziest man alive at this point in time) come crashing in the closet. jimmy takes a few drags of his joint and whisper-yells: "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO, IRVIN?!" irvin? who's irvin? is that what the I stands for? must be. so-called 'irvin' attempts to speak but is at total loss of words, jay senses he is seriously shocked, as far as an android can be, and had not intended this crash or whatever it was. "i- i swear on my life man," he breaths, jay didn't know androids could value their life. "i did absolutely nothing!" as irvin is getting more riled up by the second, jimmy seems to be over the matter already, peeking out from the closet doors, into the main lobby: "okay guys we need to figure out what happened, i have a slight suspicion, you stay here, and ill go fix it" he leaves the closet and locks the door. "yeah fuck you, always thinking im incapable of anything!" jimmy did not hear irvins complains.

on the inside of the mysterious van, a man and what he presumes to be an android, lay, distraught and in the dark, both literally and figuratively, as they do not know whats going on. on the outside, jimmy urine is seeking the cause of the crash, proving his suspicion right: the engine had a malfunction while attempting hyper-drive, eventually over-clocking, going way over light-speed and ending up in the past; that is pretty awful, but easily fixed, he just needs to find out in which date and place he is, or was...

"bruh, you really do work with the real jimmy urine" jay breaks the silence, whilst irvin is rummaging through the closet the second time since their journey started: "oh don't you start with the whole 'pathological liar' thing too! everything i say is true! im just so cool, nobody believes it is." so cool, haha who is this man kidding? "yeah, super uncool..." jay stands up after voicing his terrible comeback; now standing face to face with irvin S, who locks eyes with him. they both feel the energy and move closer, now standing less than a centimeter apart (fuck america) when promptly, the door opens and a curious man with a small mustache directly under his nose comes into view: "ah you two are gonna be interested in this! i saw your alien ship land and i thought to myself: maybe they survived, and then i saw your inmate run away from it, i was sure there was some live forms still available, now if you'd like to follow me...." pff he thinks jimmy is their prisoner?! and fuck, this dude looks an awful lot like that one guy from these history books about germany, he cant assign a name tho, "do you also have the feeling you've seen him before?" irvin asks, it seems as though he also cant think of this guys name. whatever, hes sure one of them would remember, and isn't irvin an android? how did he not save that info!

they walk into a fancy-enough looking hotel lobby, up the stairs and the man shows them their quarters, pretty small, but fancy none-the less. With a singular bed and a nice looking nightstand, jay notices the lack of a TV and the overall old-looking decorations present throughout the room, or the entire building, but in this singular room its more prominent, like the alarm clock, and the curtains. "well gentlemen, you get to stay here free of charge if you promise to meet with me at 20:30 in the restaurant area.. now, if you'll excuse me." the man leaves them alone.

"ehm, irvin, i presume that's your 'name', where exactly was the autodrive programmed to go, if it was ever programmed?" jay lays down on the single bed they've been assigned. irvin paces through the room, presumably scanning his disc for any entries on the matter: "yes, that is my name and i'm sorry sir, i cannot seem to find any info on the subject: 'autodrive'" he lies down next to jay. who says, that they're probably in europe, as the mystery man said to meet them 20:30 which is military time; and to americans it seems as though only europe uses these. irvin quickly calculates that, that would mean to meet at 8:30 pm and tells jay to shut up; he does as told and sets an alarm for 8 on the old clock on the nightstand. It appears irvin needs to charge or something, no clue how he was gonna do that without any power source here.

"what did you say your name was?" ah what an inconvenience "jimmy urine." "sorry we do not have any records of that" jimmy is helpless: "try looking for little miss piss" the officer seems to not like his answer all that much: "sir i can see youre in no way little and cleary not a miss, and i dont know if you think you're being funny here but this overly perverse use of profanity, i will not tolerate." without any further reasoning jimmy is put to the floor and dragged to the nearest police station which seems to have been only 10 meters away (fuck you americans!). as hes sat down, he tries to deduce where hes landed, he can tell theres not been any form of digitalization yet, there's also no obvious homos around, so it must be pre-95 for sure. maybe he should have dressed up like a regular guy, he would for sure have a much better time here. why was he arrested anyway? cant you ask a couple strangers what the date is? what an un-progressive place this is!

"little jimmy urine" he is called up, so he goes to the front person, whatever. "Sir, would you like to explain why you have been brought here?" the woman asks him, and he does: "well you see, my space ship had a malfunction and i ended up time traveling, so i was trying to figure out what year i had landed, but to no avail, as a police officer approached me knocked me out and brought me here." the woman behind the counter seemed to understand, as she pulled jimmy closer and whispered in his ear: "i understand, we had a similar incident yesterday, the date is february 26 1933, make sure to act fast and get out of here!" jimmy is relieved hes found an ally, he quickly thanks her and walks out.

fuck, he forgot to ask what country he is in! well, he cant go back now... hes got to tell irvin and that recruit, he hopes they didn't fuck up his ship while he was gone.

the clock reads 8 and starts ringing. irvin wakes and sits in a flash, as jay has to try recollecting his mind before moving any body part, but hes lucky as irvin does it for him, dragging him off the bed and jumping on his stomach. "wake!" great! who programmed this dude? jay stands up without a word and throws irvin a pissed-off expression.

irvin insists on following jay to the bathroom, claiming he would lose track of time otherwise, all while not stopping shouting "wake!" every 5 seconds or so. jay continues with his normal routine, and later leaves the bathroom with irvin on his track. "dude you're really annoying, i cant see why jimmy works with you!" he snaps. irvin starst to frown: "im sorry you're retarded like that! that's just how he raised me, you have to know man, when i was but a child, he took me in and took care of me! he taught me how to shoplift, and stuff! and im sure you'll come to love my faggy ass ways if you just tried to expand your horizon a bit. And to be one hundred with you, i think you're plain annoying as-well man!" whatever this dude is saying makes no sense, hes an android; he doesn't get raised! he gets programmed. "whatever lets just leave to see this weird ass dude".

and so irvin and jay leave to see 'this weird ass dude'. the alarm clock still ringing in the background.

Chapter Text

there was countless people, all engaged in chatter, or business, who knows?
Now, this guy said to meet them here, but there was yet to be a sign of him.
The update I.S. had tried to install for the time the two had to rest, had gotten stuck at 58%, which is: a shame.
But not a tragedy, and so survivable, if not, bearable...
the thing to focus on Now was to find the odd guy from the text books, that was gonna prove to be very difficult, seeing as the room was heavily crowded.
I.S. looked over to jayy who apparently got engaged in a conversation with some hipster, and was not sparing a thought to the peculiar situation at hand.

minutes passed, minutes of listening to the mindless chatter, I.S. just went to standby and started sorting through his recent logs, like the waking of J.U who was supposed to stay asleep for a while longer...
a long while. The fact he woke up, was messing with the whole damn plan! also, where the FUCK did he strive off to??? not like he could go anywhere far with those looks, HERE!

Finally, after what felt like hours, but probably was just mere minutes (he had never been patient) I.S. was woken from his stand by to the mysterious man, standing in front of him, just a few centimeters too close for comfort. oh, he was saying something... ah, yes the table, yes the meeting is starting... lets get to a table and sit, yes.

so they did, and now the three of them were sitting at a table, in the middle of this odd restaurant. The man was ongoing about this, "final solution" -he seemed a tad bit arrogant, if not paranoid. but then he started talking about terrorism, and thats where I.S' ears peaked, (yes, physically the motor rotated them XDD) terrorism, on the befor standing meeting of, whatever, some important people.

that sounds a lot more fun that sitting here. so, they lay out a plan and irvin saves it all to his HDD, which he was thinking of upgrading to an SSD, thinking how its, you know "solid" and all that, -maybe in his adventurous job it would be quite good, also it wouldnt be this loud and whirring.

but whatever, that could wait a while longer, the backup would take ages, anyway. Back in the day, jimmy used to help him with these backups, when they had to install a new hard drive, or one of his storage expansion ports grew obsolete. like when they replaced his floppy drive with a cd/dvd -RW. very fun (it wasnt).

but now, it was all about this odd man, and his equally odd plans. -really a weird dude. But there wasnt much excitement in irvins life in these days, so whatever. meeting jay was probably the best thing that happened in a few years.

The man led them to a sort of interrogation room. And made them sign a kind of NDA, which they were reluctant to do, but decided it wouldnt matter, as back in their time, this dude would be dead anyways, so theres no point in risking injury by not being compliant. the room was squishy and yellow, it reminded irvin of the psych ward walls, except they were much cleaner, and white, and really had nothing in common, just the light, and even that really was different.

There wasnt much stuff happening in this room, just you know, going over the BOOOORING plans, who cares !

As they went back to their room, it was a very very late time, or early? it was 2 am. so they went to the room again, and started praying, because jimmy was still out there.

"i think we should really go look for big J" jay said, sounded funny, because his name's jay and he said big J which is the letter but it sounds like- also it was odd because they havent really spoken with each other since they woke up at 8 pm, but he was probably right: they should go look for jimmy!

they were out on the streets, unknown date and place, at 2 am, this couldnt be good. And it led to some dialouge between the two, some exchange of personal information, jayy kept nagging irvin about his second initial, which he didnt reveal, much to jayys disappointment. irvin led jayy to their now abandoned "ship" to gear up. the "ship", stuck in that alley -still, of-course. hadnt moved since yesterday, and sure wasnt going to, soon. "ya think were gonna get outta here?" jayy asked then, and irvin stood still for a second, presumably analyzing their probabilities, maybe this had happened to him before?: "no, unless we find the old man" that didnt sound too convincing, figuring, you know, jimmy just ran off, without a word.

but hope remained, and so did the silence they just broke. although it wasnt really disturbed, the empty streets were much unusual to both mens life style. -everyday life. whatever. so it was quite nice. Also not having to worry about the pigeons, or other people looking for them, was relaxxing. unless they had planted agents here? in this time?

that odd guys paranoia was maybe starting to wash off to them as-well. Or they were going crazy from, the drugs? the withdrawal? or the time travel? maybe they were just crazy, like from birth? (did you know that 1/5 teenagers has borderline? maybe that study was clickbaity, i didnt read it all the way.)

They reached the door now, quietly opened it and stepped in.

What they didnt expect though, upon entering, was to be hit on the back of their head with a brutal force, by a dull object, sending them both to the ground, unconscious.