Chapter Text
It felt like Eddie had always known Buck. It felt as though they’d always been best friends, and he’d slotted into their little family so smoothly that Eddie sometimes forgot that Buck hadn’t been there since the day Eddie had first held his son in his arms. And once Eddie realised he was in love with Buck, it kind of felt like it had always been that way too.
Because so much of the time when they were together, it felt like nothing had changed: when they were joking around in the engine to or from calls; when Buck was sending Eddie strings of memes- usually during the hours when Eddie was asleep and Buck should have been asleep; or they were naturally paired up for chores around the station. Buck had a way of making the worst chores fun, and they worked seamlessly together on calls so they barely had to speak. And even when Eddie woke up to a string of memes and TikTok videos, it had always been a nice feeling to know that Buck had been thinking of him or wanted to share things with him. Eddie had never really had that before.
Or there would be brief moments where Eddie would get a glimpse of what could be and be stunned all over again by how easily they fit together: doing the dishes at the Diaz house when Buck was over for dinner; navigating Christopher’s homework; handing out candy to trick or treaters on Halloween; or fixing little things around the house that seemed to spring up the moment Eddie fixed the last thing. Buck had been known to come over just to help Eddie fold laundry when he was feeling overwhelmed by it all, and Eddie was forever grateful to have Buck as his co-parent.
Which made it so difficult right now. Because now, there’d be the moments where Eddie’s gaze would linger on Buck without him realising, or Buck would brush past him and the lightest contact would make Eddie’s stomach swoop and Eddie would falter for a beat. Because he didn’t know what the rules were when you told your best friend that you were in love with him but were giving him space to work out his own feelings.
Every time a message from Buck popped up on Eddie’s phone screen, Eddie’s heart skipped a beat, wondering if this would be the message, to tell him that Buck had made a decision. He’d catch Buck watching him carefully out of the corner of his eye; and sometimes, when Eddie caught his gaze, Buck would open his mouth slightly like he was about to say something. But he never did.
Eddie could be patient. He was patient. It was a skill he’d been forced to learn both in the Army, and as a parent. And he’d meant it when he’d told Buck that he’d wait as long as was needed, that he was content with what they had. If Buck decided that he didn’t want to risk their friendship, or couldn’t return Eddie’s feelings, nothing would change. But that didn’t mean that Eddie hadn’t spent many, many moments in the past six weeks or so wanting to crawl out of his own skin, feeling like he was going mad. Because he loved Buck. He’d kissed Buck, and it had taken him less than twenty minutes after Buck had left the house that night at the end of September to fear that he’d forget what it was like. And he couldn’t ask Buck for a do-over, because Eddie was pretty sure that counted as ‘pushing’.
So while he waited- patiently- for Buck to think everything over, Eddie satisfied himself with the moment he and Buck first locked eyes at the beginning of a shift and the smile Buck would gift him with; even if a small part of him kept dreaming that one day Buck’s smile would be slightly different and Eddie would just know it meant good news for them before a single word was said between them.
On the Monday of the week of Thanksgiving, Eddie had subtly positioned himself in the perfect spot to catch Buck’s gaze when he entered the station, ready for the smile. Instead, when Buck finally arrived, his shoulders were tense and he looked pale. Eddie’s heart sank, especially as Buck didn’t even seem to see him as he headed for the locker room. Eddie took a few steps forward but then hesitated, where normally he would have immediately been on Buck’s heels. Had Buck made up his mind? Was it bad news?
If it isn’t going to happen, he’s still your best friend. He’s still family, his inner voice reminded him. You told him nothing would change either way. Prove it, Diaz.
And that got Eddie through the door.
“Hey,” he greeted him cautiously. “You okay?”
Buck was slumped onto the bench before his open locker, his knee jiggling. “My parents are coming to town.”
Eddie had never met the Buckley parents. Honestly, he could count on one hand the number of times Buck had ever mentioned his parents in a way that wasn’t a passing reference in a story from his childhood. And while they all had suspicions about why Buck and Maddie never seemed to talk to their parents or visit, Eddie had never dared to ask.
“Huh. Why are they coming?” he asked, sitting on the bench beside Buck.
Buck huffed out a bitter laugh. “Maddie invited them. For Thanksgiving. And conveniently forgot to mention this until they drove over the California border.”
Eddie arched an eyebrow. “They drove here? From Pennsylvania?”
From the impression he had of them, that seemed more effort than he’d ever expected them to make.
“In an RV, according to Maddie. My parents are those people now, apparently,” Buck shook his head. “They would never let me go camping- not even in the backyard; but now that they’re retired, they’re all about the road life?”
“Retirement changes people,” Eddie offered, his mind swirling with questions. “My abuelo got really into coin collecting when he retired.”
Buck merely hummed, looking far too tired for someone at the start of a twenty-four hour shift. “Do you think this is why Chim’s been acting so weird lately?”
“Maybe,” Eddie shrugged, thinking back on Chim’s odd behaviour around Buck the past few days. “You know he’s terrible with secrets.”
The door opened behind them and they turned as one as Hen stuck her head in the door. “You guys had better hurry up,” she warned them. “Bobby’s about ready, and he won’t be pleased if he’s waiting on you two.”
As one, Buck and Eddie immediately sprang to their feet, Eddie hurrying for the door while Buck practically lunged for his uniform. And that was the last they got to talk about anything non-work related for a while as they went through their usual routine at the beginning of a shit. Buck was still noticeably subdued, and Eddie noticed Bobby shooting some vaguely concerned looks towards him. Eddie, after watching Chim awkwardly and profusely apologise to Buck for… tripping over air a good three feet away from Buck as they passed in opposite directions at a call, decided that enough was enough and cornered Chimney at the next opportunity when they were back at the station.
“When exactly did you find out?”
Chimney spun around, eyes wide. “Find out? When did you find out?” he demanded.
Eddie quirked an eyebrow. “This morning? Buck told me when he got in.”
“He knows?”
Eddie stared at Chim confusedly. “Yes? Was he not supposed to? I think he’d notice when an RV turned up to Thanksgiving dinner, don’t you?”
Oddly, Chim’s shoulders seemed to slump in- relief? Disappointment?
“Right. Thanksgiving.”
“When did you find out they were coming?” Eddie asked again.
Chim’s face settled into a rather grim expression. “Recently. Very recently. Maddie didn’t want to tell Buck until the last minute. I think she thought he’d flee- and honestly I don’t blame him.”
Eddie tried to put himself in Chim’s shoes. Thanksgiving dinner while meeting your girlfriend’s parents for the first time- just before she gave birth. Eddie didn’t envy Chim’s position, and it made sense why Chim had been acting so odd lately.
Eddie clasped Chim’s shoulder reassuringly. “Don’t sweat it, man. Meeting the in-laws? Not as scary as it sounds.”
Chim snorted weakly. “Weren’t you like fifteen when you first met Shannon’s family?”
“Something like that,” Eddie admitted.
Chim pointed at him. “Just wait until you start dating again, Diaz. Then we’ll see if meeting the in-laws ‘isn’t as scary as it sounds’.”
He walked away before Eddie could say anything else. Eddie almost laughed, until he realised that if things went well with Buck, he and Chimney might have very similar ‘meeting the in-law’ experiences. Or at least, the same future in-laws.
“Ah, crap,” Eddie muttered under his breath, just as the alarm sounded.
Fortunately it was nothing too terrible- at least in the grand scheme of things. The guy who had gotten his hand stuck in the garbage disposal probably thought it was plenty terrible.
As Hen and Chim headed for the hospital with the patient in tow, Buck, Eddie and Bobby headed back towards the engine, leaving the man’s partner to clean everything up. Eddie was very glad that wasn’t a part of their job description.
“Surprisingly, not the worst garbage disposal call I’ve had,” Buck said, almost cheerfully. “Bobby, remember that time in my first month when-”
“Buck, this maybe isn’t the best story for right before I’m about to make tomato soup for lunch,” Bobby cut him off gently.
Buck actually laughed, and Eddie couldn’t believe that this was the man he was in love with.
“Can I make the grilled cheeses?” Buck asked Bobby eagerly. “I’ve got an idea that if I mix cheddar with-”
From within his turncoat, Buck’s phone chimed and he came to a dead halt, fumbling for it frantically. Eddie and Bobby stopped too, waiting. When Buck managed to dig out his phone, he checked it almost apprehensively, but his shoulders quickly eased in relief.
“It’s Dr Copeland,” he said. “I asked her to let me know when she had a sec.”
He looked over at Bobby, who waved him off. “Make it quick, kid,” he said simply and Buck nodded eagerly. His eyes flickered over to Eddie for just a second before he turned away, phone pressed to his ear.
“Is he okay?” Bobby asked Eddie lowly, as they continued walking towards the engine.
Eddie hesitated for just a moment before answering, knowing that Buck wouldn’t mind Bobby knowing. And also knowing nothing really stayed secret among the 118 for long.
“His parents are coming for Thanksgiving,” he replied. “He just found out.”
Bobby’s eyes narrowed in concern. “Hm,” was all he said, but Eddie knew that tone. He was a dad too.
When Eddie finally got a chance to talk to Buck alone, it was as he was cleaning the kitchen after lunch. Technically, it was Chim’s turn to do so, but Bobby had suggested to Buck they take advantage of the lull between calls to bake, and Buck had leapt at the chance. It was times like this that Eddie really had to give Bobby props as captain; he knew Buck needed something to settle him and had effortlessly stepped in- also ensuring that it gave him a chance to talk to Buck as they baked.
As Buck rinsed all the lunch dishes before loading them into the dishwasher, Eddie silently stepped up to help him. Although it hadn’t been planned, the rest of the crew seemed to discreetly step away to give them some privacy.
“Do you know how long your parents are here for?”
Buck sighed. “No. A few days, at least. Maddie says we have to have dinner tomorrow night with them. Plus Thanksgiving.”
“You can come to Abuela’s with Chris and I for Thanksgiving,” Eddie offered immediately, taking over loading the rinsed dishes into the dishwasher. “You know Abuela and Pepa would love to have you.”
Buck looked torn, but ultimately shook his head- as Eddie had rather expected. “Thanks, Eds. But I can’t leave Maddie alone with them. Who knows what they’re going to say about… everything.”
“When was the last time you saw them?”
Buck kept rinsing bowls for Eddie to load, scrubbing intently at one remnant of soup that stubbornly clung to the bowl. “I called them when Doug died,” he said flatly, his eyes darkening. “Saw them? When I left Hershey in 2012.”
Eddie had his own issues with his parents, and God knew his parents hadn’t always been thrilled with his life choices, but they still spoke regularly. Eddie couldn’t imagine a world where he didn’t see his parents for years. The idea of Christopher not wanting to see or talk to him for that long made Eddie wince.
“I could come to dinner with you tomorrow night?” Eddie offered as he closed the dishwasher and started the cycle.
Buck shot Eddie a small smile as he reached for the dishcloth to dry his hands. “Thanks, Eds. But I wouldn’t subject you to my parents either. I don’t know if our rel-”
Eddie straightened slightly as Buck cut himself off, a dust of pink creeping over his cheeks.
“If our friendship could survive that,” Buck finished lamely, his tone dropping.
Eddie swallowed, holding Buck’s gaze. “I think we can survive anything,” he said quietly. “I’ve got your back, remember?”
Buck ducked his face, seemingly entirely focused on folding the dishcloth and putting it away, but couldn’t completely hide the way his smile grew and that pink flush deepened. And Eddie… Eddie hoped.